❝ — I WISH I COULD JUST CHANGE — ❞
indie fandomless oc, written by kacie

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@typicalross
❝ — I WISH I COULD JUST CHANGE — ❞
indie fandomless oc, written by kacie

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ooc: i’m baaaaaaack ~
herd u liek 2 suk dick
srry not urs dude
No, Kennedy! | Ross&Kenny
actuallybirb:
There was just something about when Holly left the house that led Kennedy to absolutely lose her sense of right and wrong. The tiny brunette haired toddler was often fairly rambunctious on her own while they were at home, but it seemed to just go one step farther when it was clear to her that her mama was nowhere to be seen.
Getting bored of being confined to the area that connected from the main room to the kitchen, Kennedy patted her little hands against sliding glass window in hopes that her daddy would open it for her. She had to go outside!! Every impulse in her mind told her that she needed to go interact with the area that Holly typically kept her away from, out of fear that she’d end up falling into their pool.
“Eh… Ehh!” Kennedy whined, deciding not to use the few words she knew and instead just using her primal-like noises to get what she demanded. Daddy had to be able to understand her, right?!
Having a kid was actually pretty fucking cool. Okay, so, there were some days when Ross wondered how he'd managed to keep Kennedy alive for so long, because she had some weird impulses, but then he'd remember - Holly. Holly was probably the one keeping all three of them alive most of the time, but Ross had his moments where his adulthood would truly kick in. Unfortunately, not always did it kick in when it was his turn to be a solo parent. There'd already been too many times when he'd tried to squeeze Kenny into Orph's old Halloween costumes and bounced her on his knee while animating even though Holly had literally just fed her. Sometimes Ross wasn't great at being a parent, but with Holly working today, he hoped to do alright.
"What's up, Ken?" Ross was halfway between the living room and the kitchen when he heard his daughter's distressed sounds, her fists thunking against the glass just a dull sound in comparison to her grunts. He headed towards her, squatting down close with his eyebrows raised as if she was posing the most puzzling question in the world. "You know I can't just let you outside, right? Mom would be mad at me."
Ross reaches out to Kennedy, putting a steadying hand on her back in case her toddling steps got too wobbly her fist-pounding got anymore aggressive on the glass and really knocked her over. "Outside is not for kiddos. Let's play with the kitties. How about that? The kitties?" He offered what he thought was a compromise, trying to turn her attention away from the bright outside world.
angiespeggy:
list of trash aus i need immediately (send me “trash au” and i’ll use a random generator to decide which starter to write for you)
“hey we hooked up last night and it turns out you are my childs teacher” au
“we both play this stupid game online and you keep beating me every single goddamn time so i called you out and you are pretty cute but can you not” au
“im a bartender and you just came in here without shoes sat down and ordered a chocolate volcano and idk what the fuck that is and im scared to ask” au
“we are neighbours and every night at 3:14 am you start yodeling for no fucking reason??? why???? is that you yodeling??? its been 2 months???” au
“im a pizza delivery person and i just delivered a pizza to someone in the middle of a satanic ritual and they gave me their number???” au
“i woke up this morning to find you sitting in my living room with a goat in a poncho??? who are you??? why is the goat wearing a poncho??? how did you get the goat in here i live on the 12th floor???” au
“we work out at the same gym and you always look super legit but i know you sing hannah montana in the shower and you know i know” au
“im a cashier and i saw you stuffing you pants full of potatoes and i would stop you but you already have 27 and i want to see how many you can fit” au
“its 4 am and im drunk as fuck in a mcdonalds and you have been watching my trying to eat this burger for 30 minutes” au
“i was playing beer pong with a coin and i accidentally threw it right into your eye at a party” au

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sockleton:
rerrss
nexttimeongrumps:
Oh. A weight was lifted as the other rejected Arin’s fear of being seen as repulsive to him. He lightly smiled. His fear of being a disappointment was not only wrong, but made Ross react almost immediately when told to him. There was no time for Arin’s words to hang in the air before Ross dismissed him. He had been so scared that Ross didn’t want him, but his reaction made him realize that his fear was for nothing.
Arin carefully listened to Ross’s words, hanging on to each one. The mood of the conversation had changed from before. No more evasive eye contact nor ambiguous expression. They were finally talking about how scared they both really were; finally talking about how much this terrified them. Arin knew that this made him happy, that no one would make a better soulmate than his best fucking friend, but he also knew that this wasn’t easy for either of them. Just because this is something they both want doesn’t necessarily mean that they’ll just live happily ever after. The future was still so uncertain, but these things take time. Baby steps. Right now the accomplishment was that they could finally look each other in the eyes and be direct about how the felt.
"You’re not making it worse.“
His tone was much more relaxed now. He was nervous, he was sure that the look on his face made that very obvious. But at least now he knew he would be able to say what he wanted without fear of saying the wrong thing. He held back the impulsive part of his personality, trying his hardest to fully communicate the thoughts he actually wanted Ross to hear.
"Look dude, waiting until you get back home is just a bad plan. If we do that, then we might now ever talk about it at all, and I don’t want that.”
He let out a deep sigh. This was going to be hard, Ross was right about that, but it was important. He looked down at his food, still in the wrapper, and back up into the other’s deep, blue eyes.
"Let’s just… You know, this isn’t exactly something I want to talk about at a Del Taco. Do you want to go somewhere else? We can go to my house, or I can should you around LA. I’m sure it’s completely different from Perth. And when we’re ready to talk about it, then we’ll talk about it.“
He knew that there was still so much more to talk about. Sure, they could talk about hypotheticals forever, but that would be pointless. Things were already changing for them so fast, he was sure their relationship would never be the same and this was just the beginning of such a drastic change in their dynamic.
Maybe they could just get to know each other better. They talked all the time online, and Ross was his best friend, but that wasn’t exactly the same as seeing how someone acts in everyday life. Their habits and the way they walk, it was going to be all new to them. Before they could plan how often they were going to visit each other or plan for the future, Arin felt they needed to just dick around and be buddies for a bit. He wanted to experience Ross through a new lense, to see him as a friend and a soulmate at the same time. That was the only way he would know how he really felt about this. After all, when Arin saw Ross at the airport he feared that the other would take one look at him and think that he wasn’t that great after all. He feared that Ross would think that he wasn’t everything that he said he was. That fear was still true deep down, and he needed time to tell if their relationship would work at all while not talking through a screen.
He reached out his hand, placing it on top of the other man’s, hoping he could just play it off as friendly if the contact was seen as too intimate.
"Okay?”
Arin was the farthest thing from a disappointment. After months upon months of video chats, texts, and the odd phone call here and there, Ross had easily come to the decision that Arin was fucking amazing. By now, it was probably clear that neither one of them were very good at voicing their feelings, hadn't stuck their necks out long enough for their hopes to ever talk about their timers before, but Ross hoped that at the very least, Arin knew his friendship was valued. It'd never once crossed his mind that he'd see the other in a different light once they were face-to-face for real, but he'd worried about communication. Ross stressed that maybe their friendship was destined to have them both stuck behind computer monitors and nothing more, and even now, he still had inklings of those worries. It'd be unfair to destine two people who were meant for each other to only understand one another when they were separated by an ocean and thousands of miles.
But Arin was right. Even if they were still lacking in the area of smooth conversation, it wouldn't do them any good to wait until he was back in Australia to talk about being soulmates. Ross nodded, because he agreed and didn't want to waste this week worrying about what was meant to inevitably become of their relationship. It was best to just… let it happen. It would probably take time and maybe a better setting than a fast food restaurant, but sooner or later, they'd have to force them- selves to talk and state more than the obvious facts. Ross just really hoped that he'd be able to be more honest with Arin than he was with himself.
The longer his best friend spoke, the more Ross relaxed. The furrow in his brow smoothed out and he could feel some of the anxious tightness that had been growing in his chest uncoil. (That was the magic of a soulmate, too, wasn't it? Their ability to fill in the blanks and calm each other down.) When Arin reached out to him, Ross looked down to the space where their hands met, eyes lingering a little long. He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and nodded, taking the bit of contact a step further when he turned his hand up enough to squeeze Arin's fingers in his own. He looked back to his friend and offered a smile - possibly the most real one he'd managed all day.
"Okay. That's probably the smartest thing I've ever heard you say before."
Ross teased, the corner of his mouth quirking up a little more to show it, just in case they were just that out of sync. He started to ease his hand out of Arin's, sneaking it away in a reluctant motion to reach for his pair of burritos on their meal tray. They wouldn't get anywhere sitting around in Del Taco holding hands - not that Ross would complain.
"Do you want to eat or should we take this stuff to go? I don't think I have a whole lot of sightseeing energy in me today, so going to your place would be cool. If that's alright with you? I could kick your ass at Smash Bros. if you wanted."
He raised his eyes back to the other, curious to hear what Arin had in mind. Ross was looking forward to seeing Arin's room in real life. He wanted to see a less pixeled version of his life, which would eventually include running around LA, he was sure, but starting small was good. Especially good when he'd jumped backwards a whole day and they both had more than enough on their minds.
nexttimeongrumps:
The lack of expression on Ross’s face made him absolutely livid. I fucking care. Arin could hardly believe that. Ross was holding back emotion, and that almost made Arin more angry. If he really cared about him, than he could have said it by now. They shared so many silent, awkward moments together today; surely one of those moments could have been an opportunity to express that he really cared. Arin’s nostrils flared at the words, his eyes never leaving the other. It wasn’t until Ross’s expression changed into something more annoyed that Arin was able to relax his shoulders. He didn’t want Ross to be mad at him, but at least anger was better than indifference.
Arin thought about how unique their situation was to other soulmate stories. Most people’s clocks countdown to zero as they look at a complete stranger. Sure, that must be awkward too, having to walk up to someone you don’t know anything about and knowing that one day you’re likely to become best friends and get married. But Arin and Ross had been best friends way before their clocks counted down. Being given an out from not only your soulmate, but your best fucking friend— it felt like a punch to the gut. He couldn’t put into words how much he didn’t want that; how scared he was that their friendship was never going to be the same again. So he stayed quiet, breathing out deep sighs, trying to find the words to say.
At the question, he wasn’t entirely sure how to answer. He finally had to look away, looking back down at his tray of untouched food. Honesty was probably the best option, but lying was much easier. Being honest meant being stared at and judged, when lying meant that he could act as dickish as he wanted. Honest answer: of course he expected it. He hadn’t ever heard of soulmates meeting after they already knew each other on opposite sides of the planet. He wasn’t sure if that’s how it even worked. But as soon as he knew Ross was staying with him for the week and exactly which week it was, he knew deep down that fate was finally bringing them together after years of waiting.
But he wasn’t going to admit that out loud. Despite Ross admitting that meeting for the first time was actually much more scary than either of them had expected, Arin didn’t want to give himself up like that. It was too embarrassing, too much information. He was too oblivious to realize why Ross was asking the question.
"No. Of course not. I didn’t even know that— that soulmates could even be on different continents.“
He finally looked up again to see the pained expression of the other man’s face. He regretted lying immediately. He wondered if the other could tell, if their connection meant that Ross would be able to call him out on his bullshit and know exactly what he was thinking. But it wasn’t fair to play a game. This conversation was happening whether he liked it or not now. This was the story they were going to tell people in the future, their soulmate story. Of course, that was assuming this week was going to go well.
"I mean, I wanted it to happen. When my clock counted down and it was actually you… I couldn’t be happier. I just—”
He closed his eyes and brushed hair out of his face with his hand, thinking of how to phrase it correctly this time.
"I don’t want to just give up. I know that we live far away and it’s not ideal. But giving me an out… does the fact that it’s me as your soulmate really repulse you that much?“
As far as soulmates went, their situation was different. Lucky was probably what most people would call it. They had the chance to be friends before soulmates and that wasn't something people did. They went through the motions of a normal friendship developing before knowing what the universe had already predetermined for them and man, if that wasn't a plot to some awful rom-com Ross would've gladly laughed at. Unfortunately, this wasn't a movie. This wasn't some story he was hearing secondhand with the details washed down. This was his life and it was far more terrifying that he'd expected.
Ross wanted to feel lucky. He did before. He'd felt uncharacteristically hopeful when he played with the idea of Arin being his soulmate, but in the harsh light of day, he kept thinking of words like 'mistake' and 'wrong' and maybe even worst of all 'platonic'. It's what set him on edge. Made him default to a neutral expression and now, listening to Arin more, Ross's shoulders were drooping and he was forcing himself to hold back quite possibly the heaviest eye roll in history.
If Arin was going to play dumb, then Ross could, too. Of course that hadn't been what he was asking. He was tentatively trying to gauge Arin's reaction to all of this, to figure out if maybe there was some tiny, microscopic chance that he'd been hopeful, too, at some point. Ross sighed, eyes cast downwards as he reached for his face again. This time, he started to press the heel of his hands against his closed eyes. He attempted to stave off the increasing chance of a migraine and stop himself from saying anything else more damaging. (For Example: I want to go home.)
But then - then Arin was saying maybe the best thing ever. He wanted it to happen. He wanted his soulmate to be Ross. Within seconds, he looked back up, elbows still heavy on the Del Taco booth table and shoulders hunched, but Ross was stared at Arin. Focused and listening.
"You --"
Ross stopped himself and let Arin continue, but as soon as the heavy question dropped, he wished he'd just kept on talking. He shook his his head, quick and urgent, because no. No fucking way.
"Arin, no. That's not - That's not what I'm trying to say at all. Why would you even…"
No, no, no. They needed to stop with the hypotheticals or else they'd be be here all day and Ross would probably start crying out of frustration within the hour. He sighed, a heavy breath in and then out, before leaning further forward against the table.
"I'm happy that it's you. I'm not repulsed. You're my best friend, dude, and I love y -- I love having someone I can tell anything. But all I'm trying to say is that this is going to be hard. Like, when are you going to be in Perth next, Arin, really? And even without the distance, I'm here for a week. We're together, in person, for only a week, and I don't to ruin this by going over endless hypotheticals and bullshit that might not matter in six months, y'know?"
Was he making any sense? Ross had no clue. His blue eyes were wide as he stared at Arin, doing his best to stop stumbling over his words and speak with conviction and the sincerity that he felt.
"If you wanted to postpone this conversation until I'm back home or just not even talk about it, then I'm saying: no hard feelings. I'm just trying to not fuck things up and I'm probably making it worse by opening my stupid mouth at all, but this isn't how I expected this to go. I don't know what I thought, but I didn't think we'd fight about it, and I don't want to, either."
Holly: i had several adult beverages
Holly: and now i'm hungry but also very tired
Holly: Jessica left me alone like the WORST FRIEND EVER
Holly: orph is very concerned
Ross: Do you need an adult babysitter now?
Ross: Don't squeeze any of the cats too hard.
Ross: also, any requests for dinner?
nexttimeongrumps:
His heart stopped as their hands touched, the other’s cup being pushed into his hand. He forced himself to look up at him. Arin knew he had fucked up, and Ross’s concerned look didn’t make him feel much better. He hated that his impulsive nature got the best of him, forcing thoughts that should just be kept quiet out into thin air. Part of him appreciated Ross ignoring everything he had just said, but another part of him wished that this wasn’t so hard for them to just talk about.
Arin bit his bottom lip and stepped back as their shoulders brushed. He watched Ross walk to pick up their food; he could have stood there forever. All of their interactions today had already been so awkward; the airport, the car ride, standing in line… Arin didn’t want to think about sitting across from the other face to face. But as another group of people came up to fill up their cups too, Arin knew that he just needed to man up and act like an adult. He filled the other’s cup with Mountain Dew, quietly apologized for making people wait behind him, and carried the two cups in each of his hands over to the booth Ross had been sitting at.
The air was different. Before it was fake smiles, and attempting to make the other as comfortable as possible without bringing up the whole soulmates thing. But neither of them was smiling now. Arin pushed Ross’s drink towards him, and sat across from him, mirroring his body image. He couldn’t tell how distressed the other felt, his face just reading as uninterested and detached. Finally: no more bullshit. No more dancing around the one thing that was really on both of their minds. At least that’s what Arin thought before Ross said the most disheartening thing Arin could hear right now. Perhaps it was the most disheartening thing Ross had ever said to him in their entire friendship.
"What? Why in the hell would you think I’d want that?“
His expression dropped. His eyebrows lowered and fingers trembled against the edge of the table. All the confusion and nervousness he had felt before began translating into anger.
"Look, I don’t know what our friendship means to you. But before today I thought we could talk about anything. And I don’t know why this should be any different.”
He stared into Ross’s eyes, trying to read what he was thinking. He was so frustrated that he couldn’t bother to care if he was raising his voice too loud or if he was drawing attention to them.
"Of course I want to fucking talk about it. I care about you, man.“
Arin snapped. Arin snapped and it was the last thing that Ross had expected to come from his suggestion. There was the ghost of surprise and brief concern coming across his features before Ross schooled his face back into the neutral expression he'd been holding. This wasn't what he wanted, though, not at all. He didn't want to be sitting in a fuck- ing Del Taco, arguing about his future with Arin - with his soulmate. He could hear the slight raise in Arin's tone and feel the few glances that were directed their way from other customers, but Ross didn't shrink back or attempt to give reassuring smiles to the people around them. He didn't let himself look away from Arin yet because he was stubborn. He was stubborn and an asshole.
"I -- I fucking care."
Ross was stubborn and an asshole and he felt that Arin's words were too sharp, too accusing to be left unaddressed. He knew that he could have tried to be the bigger person, tried to be calmer and more rational, but that wasn't him. That wasn't Ross's way when he was getting into an argument (and Arin better learn that now, right?). Finally, his expression changed into something a little more volatile, a look that showed emotion instead of flat-lining, because: fuck Arin if he doesn't think I care.
"You're my best friend, Arin. What the fuck ?? I'm just - I'm trying to give you an out, okay? If you don't - if you didn't - ugh."
For as much as Ross was trying to win this frustrated staring contest, he had to blink away, head tilting up as he squeezed his eyes shut tight and fought to find the right words. He wished they were alone. Wished they had some sort of privacy. Even sitting in Arin's car and overheating would be better than this, but he didn't want to be the one to suggest it. It felt like something shameful to say, especially when he was already the one to try to ignore the subject of soulmates altogether.
"Did you expect this to happen?" Ross dropped his hand from pinching the bridge of his nose, took a few more seconds to stare at the ceiling before he blinked back to Arin with an expression far more pained than before. "Did you think our timers would zero out when we saw each other? Because honestly? It's scary. It's scary as hell, dude, and it doesn't make this any easier that I'm only here for the week. I live on a whole different continent, Arin. It's not - this isn't ideal."
His wording was wrong. Probably bad and Ross braced himself for another bunch of rough words from Arin. There was a lot more he could say. A lot more he should say. Like that fact that there were moments during his flight over from Australia that he imagined his timer going off when he saw Arin. Or that there were brief moments where he stood at baggage claim, purposefully not making eye contact with other tired passengers because what if? Mostly, he probably should have said that Arin wasn't a disappointment in the slightest.

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typicalross sent - ⁇
Holly: can u get dinner
Holly: i don't trust myself to not fall asleep with food in the oven right now tbh
Ross: yeah, sure. I can pick something up on the way home.
Ross: why, though - what's up with you?
ok but a ‘your apartment is next to/above mine and i can hear you and your partner dancing and singing and the bed moving and you two laughing and talking in hushed tones and it won’t let me sleep so i bitch about it to you 24/7 and one day it stops and one day turns to one week and then months and i haven’t seen you smile in forever please let me in, i’ve been knocking for ten minutes’ au.
“ sssto – puT IT AWAY !”
“ i’m not doing anythi- !!! i didn’t do anything!”
flapflapbandit:
Suzy smiled softly, her muscles feeling tired and unused to the movement.
“Thanks, Ross. I appreciate it.”
"Well, y'know - -" He shrugged his shoulders, an almost hopeless gesture as he looked back to Suzy again. Ross offered up the same kind of minimal smile. "You deserve better, and I know that you'll get better, too. Eventually. It'll happen for you."
actuallybirb:
Slowly, he began to get herself a little closer to her husband and bury her face into the crook of his neck. He was one of the only consistencies in her life, and Holly couldn’t be any more happy about it. “I love you,” She sighed, wrapping her arms around his waist loosely.
Ross's attempted smile flickered when Holly seemed to crumble closer to him. He reached out to close the gap as well, an arm wrapping around Holly's shoulders as his other hand rested against her head, fingers starting to move through her hair. "I love you, too," he answered back, sincere and sure before Ross tipped his head down to kiss the top of his wife's head, humming a little as he paused and stayed near.

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midnight snack
actuallybirb:
Holly knew he was right. If she’d been hungry enough to wake him up in the first place, then it probably wasn’t the best idea to just ignore her stomach any further. She would only end up with a migraine, and possibly getting physically ill if it got bad enough. Not only that, but it likely wasn’t good for the baby if she didn’t end up eating something, at the very least.
“I just don’t know what my stomach will let me eat, and it’s making me so mad.” She was just so frustrated with herself. She wanted nothing more than to just go home and cry with Ross, regardless of whether they found something for her to eat or not.
Looking up, she eyed the trail mix with a displeased look before shaking her head and hiding half of her face in Ross’s shoulder. She was so glad he was so patient with her. Lord knows she sure as hell wouldn’t have the patience to deal with herself while she was exhausted, hungry, and overemotional to the nth degree. Glancing around, she took a last minute survey of the area before her eyes landed on one of the walls of Slurpee machines.
“…I could probably stomach one of those. To tide me over. It’s just ice and flavoring.”
So trail mix was definitely out. He made a quick nod and reached out to hook the bag back onto a random hook in front of them, not moving too much since he didn't want to disturb Holly's current hiding fit in his shoulder. Ross wished that this was easier. That it was a matter of just taken ten minutes to think really hard and Holly would instantly know what she wanted, but it clearly wasn't that simple. And if it was? He'd still be passed out in their bed and Holly would've made herself a snack or even made the trek to the nearest grocery store on her own. Being here with her, though, and trying to decipher her weird pregnancy cravings was hardly a burden to Ross. He just hated seeing her so upset.
"Probably not the healthiest decision but… yeah. A slushie is probably a good way to go for now." Ross agreed, eyeing the machine that had a myriad of options and mixes to choose from. He turned his head a little, enough so he could press a lingering kiss to Holly's temple. "Do you wanna grab one of those and then we go find a Von's to look around or something?" Ross mumbled into her hair, knowing that the answer already was probably a simple 'no', but he really didn't want to just go home with a Slurpee and nothing else. It wouldn't help them in the morning when Holly was twice as hungry and unable to stomach anything.
Slipping his fingers between his wife's, Ross started to lead the way back towards the Slurpee machine, considering for a moment if he should get one for himself, too, but he had plans to go right back to sleep as soon as they made it home. He shrugged his shoulders a little and looked back at Holly again. "If you want, I can take you home just call you from Von's. I know you feel like shit and it's probably not great for you to be shuffling around everywhere at two in the morning."