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Diane, it’s 10:30am and I’m completely vexed. I just spoke with Albert and he informed me that I am what people would call a ‘Twunk’. Now, I’m not sure why he would think this way but I am at a severe loss of what this means. Diane, schedule a delivery for a dictionary at your earliest convenience. I have to know why Albert referred me as this or I fear I might dwell on this too much.

COOP! AGENT DALE COOPER! I NEED YOU TO GO TO A PLACE CALLED SILENT HILL. ITS A LONG STORY I’LL FILL YOU IN AS YOU GET HERE BUT COOP SOME VERY STRANGE STUFF IS HAPPENING. NOW IM NOT SURE HOW I GOT HERE MYSELF BUT IM SEEING WEIRD THINGS THAT CORRELATE TO MY DAILY LIFE. THEYRE SAYING SOMEONE IS WAITING FOR ME IN OUR SPECIAL PLACE. I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT THIS MEANS AND I DONT THINK THEY WILL BE TOO HAPPY ABOUT THIS DOWN IN WASHINGTON.