Tusara Ame

Juvia stood by the guild’s doors, umbrella in hand, staring into the rain. Her heart felt heavy. She could feel Gray’s pain even without seeing him; it tugged at her chest like a thread. He had disappeared again, retreating into himself like he always did when the guilt hit too hard.

She couldn’t let him stay there. Not this time.

The forest outside Magnolia was washed in mist, the smell of wet earth heavy in the air. Juvia followed the faint trail that led to his cabin — the one hidden deep in the woods, where he went when he didn’t want to be found.

When she reached it, the lights were off. Only the faint glow of a dying fire flickered through the window.

“Gray-sama…” she whispered, knocking softly before opening the door.

He was sitting on the floor, back against the wall, half in shadow. His hair was messy, his usual coat discarded. The air was cold, but he didn’t seem to care.

“Juvia told you not to sit in the cold like this,” she said quietly, shutting the door behind her.

He didn’t look up. “Told you not to come.”

“Juvia never listens when Gray-sama says foolish things.”

He gave a hollow chuckle, no warmth in it. “Guess not.”

She stepped closer, kneeling in front of him. His eyes looked tired — like he hadn’t slept, like the weight of the world was sitting on his shoulders again. “Gray-sama… talk to Juvia. Please.”

“There’s nothin’ to talk about.”

“That’s not true.” She reached out, hesitant but firm, placing her hand over his. “Something’s hurting you. Juvia can feel it.”

He flinched slightly but didn’t pull away. His jaw tightened, eyes glancing to the dying fire. “I keep losin’ people, Juvia. Every time I start to think it’s fine — that I can let people in — something happens. Someone gets hurt. I can’t…” He swallowed hard. “I can’t keep doing that to everyone.”

Her heart cracked. “Gray-sama,” she whispered, squeezing his hand. “You’re not a curse. You’re not bad luck. People get hurt because life is cruel, not because of you.”

He looked up at her finally — really looked. “You don’t know what it’s like to—”

“Yes, Juvia does,” she interrupted gently. “Juvia knows what it’s like to be alone. To be blamed. To think you don’t deserve warmth.” Her voice trembled, but her gaze didn’t waver. “But you do deserve it, Gray-sama. You always have.”

For a long moment, he said nothing. The only sound was the soft crackle of the fire and the rain against the roof.

Then he whispered, “I don’t know how to stop feeling like I’m broken.”

Juvia’s eyes softened. She shifted closer, wrapping her arms around him slowly, carefully — like she was afraid he might shatter. He stiffened, breath catching, then exhaled shakily and let himself sink into the hug.

“You don’t need to fix yourself alone,” she murmured against his shoulder. “Let Juvia help carry some of the pieces.”

His hand hesitated before finding her back, holding her tighter than he meant to. For the first time in days, the cold around him began to thaw.

They sat there for a long time, the world quiet except for the rain and the sound of their breathing. When Juvia finally pulled back, she smiled softly.

“There. Gray-sama’s eyes are lighter now.”

He blinked at her, brow furrowing slightly. “You’re seein’ things.”

“Then Juvia likes seeing things,” she teased, brushing a damp strand of hair from his forehead. “You should come back to the guild tomorrow. Everyone misses you.”

He sighed. “Maybe.”

“Juvia will drag you there if you don’t.”

He smirked — just a little, but it was real this time. “That so?”

“That is a promise,” she said, smiling brightly.

He shook his head, the faintest laugh escaping him. “You’re impossible.”

“Juvia prefers persistent.”

“Yeah,” he said softly, looking at her — really seeing her. “Guess I needed that.”

Her heart fluttered. “You needed warmth. Juvia just brought it back to you.”

He didn’t say anything else, but his hand stayed on hers, his thumb brushing gently over her knuckles. The fire crackled higher, and outside, the rain began to ease.

—

Steady and gentle…

His arm is around her.

Steady and gentle…

His face is mere inches away.

Steady and gentle…

He leaned in closer, shifting their positions at the bar and pulling her into a hug.

Steady and gentle…

Juvia can see Lucy holding Gray tighter, like he's all that's keeping her together.

Steady and gentle…

Inside the main hall of Fairy Tail, the loud, pouring rain sounds more dull and melancholic due to its thick walls. Usually, summer was hot and sunny in Magnolia after mid-June-ish, but this year it seemed like the wet season was never going to end. It was to the point that the whole guild itself was slowly catching onto the gloomy atmosphere of the world.

Juvia herself felt off the entire week. After the war with Alvarez ended with her friends victorious last winter, she had thought that this year would be the first year she'd have a "normal" summer. Zeref was defeated, Acnologia was dead, and there were finally no more major threats to the people she cared about most. There wasn't even a dark guild that required her Darling to infiltrate again.

But then her Darling left anyway. Something about his team accepting a job to pay off Lucy's rent before June was over. It didn't bother her at first, it was common for Gray's team to pitch in and help Lucy keep her apartment. Juvia thought the building was quite cozy as well, so it would be a shame if Lucy had to move. However, a couple of days suddenly turned into a week, and a week turned into two weeks, and two weeks turned into early-July.

It felt just like last year.

Although, unlike last year, she knew exactly where Gray was, what he was doing. She didn't have to worry about him abandoning her for half a year, the heavy rain was just delaying his return and making his quest last longer than normal.

Despite knowing rationally that her Darling didn't leave her again, though, Juvia still felt the familiar pit in her stomach steadily forming again. She could feel the claws of emptiness cling to their usual spot along the edges of her heart. It had been a while since she felt like this, but the feelings deep inside of her enveloped the rest of her body like they never left in the first place.

Juvia's active imagination didn't help, either.

In her mind, she could see Gray patting Wendy's head after successfully taking out a tough bandit. Perhaps Erza would team up with him when the group splits up to accomplish different tasks. Maybe Lucy would walk with him to find a place to stay the night in some new town they stumble across. Lucy would let Gray carry her stuff while they looked around. Lucy would point out a nice-looking restaurant for them to eat dinner at. Lucy would pull him inside, finding them a table for two. Lucy would bat her eyes. Lucy would lean in. Lucy would close the distance. Lucy. Lucy. Always Lucy.

When Juvia looked in the mirror that morning, she saw her eyes drooping more than usual. If she focused harder, she could've probably heard the rain getting thicker outside too. She didn't care about those things, though. All she cared about was her Darling coming home, returning to her arms, and feeling whole again.

She didn't like imagining her friends betraying her or Gray leaving her for someone "better." Logically, she knew that Lucy would never do those things. It was obvious to everyone, especially Juvia, how much Lucy loved Natsu. Everything she imagined Lucy doing with Gray was probably the truth if you replaced him with Fairy Tail's resident hot-head instead. But Juvia couldn't stop. Those thoughts have haunted her all week, her jealousy, loneliness, and insecurities choking her all at once.

Leaving the girls' dormitory only made her feel worse.

There, on the window sills of multiple homes she passed by, Juvia could see teru teru bōzu hanging together from their small strings. They were probably hung with good intentions, with the citizens of Magnolia only lightheartedly praying for the rain to go away with the paper and cloth dolls, the wet season lasting a little too long.

But Juvia couldn't see their good intentions. All she could see was her past, her childhood, her younger self, sitting on the floor, begging for the rain to go away as she made her own teru teru bōzu. It was the same rain that pushed the other children away from her. The same rain that caused Bora to break up with her. The same rain that her Darling called depressing when he first met her. The same steady and gentle rain that always surrounded her, no matter how hard she tried to escape it.

Before Fairy Tail—before Gray—she believed herself to be the "Rain Woman." She had accepted that the rain she hated oh so much was herself, and that she wouldn't be able to ever separate from it, even if she wore her own doll across her neck.

Now, standing in the rain, surrounded by the same small dolls that filled her past, it felt like she was back to being the "Rain Woman," and the whole city wanted her to leave. Juvia was cold, gloomy, and so lonely.

In her mind, she craved for Gray to appear in front of her, to hold her, to tell her that he was there and that he was never going to leave her, no matter how much rain and sadness followed her. She dreamed in that moment, for him to show up and comfort her, to say that she wasn't just the "Rain Woman," or the depressing weather that Magnolia wilted in. She wanted him to grab her hand, kneel down, and ask her to never leave his side, even if it was raining.

But he wasn't there, he was on a job. A job with Natsu, a job with Erza, a job with Wendy, a job with Lucy. Lucy.

And with how hard the rain was pouring, he wasn't coming any time soon.

However, right as Juvia entered the guild, steady and gentle, Juvia saw them.

Steady and gentle…

Gray's arm was around Lucy, performing some kind of ice magic.

Steady and gentle…

Juvia couldn't hear the dull, melancholic rain outside the guild hall.

Steady and gentle…

Gray was leaning in, tugging Lucy close, bringing her into a hug.

Steady and gentle…

Juvia couldn't see the tears in Lucy's eyes.

Steady and gentle…

Lucy was clinging to Gray's body, right in front of everybody, right in front of Juvia.

Steady and gentle…

Juvia couldn't feel her Darling's love for her anymore.

—

She wasn't in the guild hall.

One moment, she was watching her Darling shatter her heart right in front of her. The next, she was outside again, feeling the familiar pitter-patter of cold rain surround her and melt into her skin. She let the chill seep into her, let it sink into her soul.

It wasn't comforting like Gray's ice-make magic, and it wasn't warm like summer's usual rain during the wet season. Instead, it was piercing, frigid, and made Juvia feel smaller than she'd ever been. It reminded her of her childhood, where no one wanted her around. It reminded her of her teenage years, where no one could love her enough to keep her close. It reminded her of last year, when she spent half of it waiting for her Darling to return.

Gray was right, Juvia is depressing.

Her whole life she believed she was destined to be alone. If she wasn't, then why was she cursed to have rain follow her wherever she went? Why did she have to be born with magic that repelled everyone around her? Gray was the only person to make her feel otherwise, he was the only one who had shown her the sky, and yet—just like the others—he wasn't with Juvia anymore. He was at the guild. He was with Lucy.

Tired of thinking, Juvia sat down, curled in on herself, and closed her eyes, a different wetness coating her cheeks.

—

Juvia's head pounded, and her throat felt parched for once.

Slowly blinking awake, Juvia lifted herself up from the soft pillow that she was resting on. Quickly, however, she jumped out of bed once she realized she was in an unfamiliar room.

The last thing she remembered was drifting off on a random street in Magnolia, not some stranger's house! Did she sleep walk and break into someone's home? Or did someone kidnap her?

Prepared for the worst, Juvia steeled herself and surveyed her new surroundings.

Behind her was the queen-sized bed she woke up on, with its dark blue comforter on the floor crumpled. To her right was a long wooden dresser with a dark furnish, with a door next to it that probably led to a small closet. What caught her attention, though, was the large window to the left of her.

It was still raining hard outside, the walls of the room not dulling the noise as much as the guild hall did. Instead, it created a natural rhythm that thrummed through her ears and settled around her heart. With a short glance, it also looked like the city streets were as empty as they were earlier that day. But what she really noticed, what she really couldn't take her eyes off of for long, was two teru teru bōzu hanging right above the sill.

Except… it wasn't hanging in a way she'd ever seen before.

Usually, a teru teru bōzu doll would hang upright, its smile looking out the window with a smile as it attempted to steer any rain away. But the two dolls on this window weren't hung upright, they were upside down. Almost like they wanted it to keep raining. Like they wanted Juvia to stay.

It was ironic in a way, how the same dolls that made her feel so lonely all her life were the first thing to actually make her feel like she belonged all week.

Steady and gentle, Juvia immersed herself in the sound of the rain again.

She didn't know how long she stood there, in the space between the bed and the window. She didn't even realize she had moved in the first place. But there was something calming about the dolls, something about them that entranced her. She could've been there for a few seconds, or maybe even a few hours. All she knew is that she didn't want to leave.

Suddenly, the door opened, one that was at the very front of the room that she was too distracted to even notice. And standing right there, hand gently holding the knob was…

"Juvia?" He blinked, "You're awake?"

With a sharp pang to her chest, it was like the floodgates opened as tears started pouring down her eyes once more.

Gray, her Darling, was here. With her. Not Lucy.

"Whoa..! What's wrong?" Before Juvia could even process it, Gray rushed over and pulled her close, holding her face carefully with his hands as if he had the power to physically wipe away her sadness.

But Juvia couldn't bring herself to say anything, her voice losing all words. Her mouth was sewn shut, like the white, cloth dolls that hung beside their heads.

With hindsight, she didn't want to tell him how much she longed for him to return home. She didn't want to admit that she was jealous of one of their best friends, who she knew was in love with someone else. She didn't want to remind him how miserable and insecure she becomes when it rains.

But her Darling didn't push her to speak; instead, his brow furrowed as he looked at her. Really took her in. Saw past her tears. As if sensing and understanding all of her thoughts, all of her insecurities, he lowered his hands until they rested on her shoulders, hugged her even closer than he ever hugged Lucy, and breathed her in.

Steady and gentle, he breathed like he wanted her to stay.

Steady and gentle, he breathed like he didn't want to leave.

Steady and gentle,

everybody thinks juvia is all about gray and gray is nothing but a jackass who ignores her feelings, her very loud feelings.

well, technically yes. that was before, when he is too emotionally constipated to even allow himself to open up to anything romantic and all that chessy shit.

but nobody knows, probably except for the guild, how much gray is all about juvia.

he doesn't normally flinch when others are in danger, well he does, but not as much as when its juvia in question. not even in gossips or any rumors going around the town.

if he hears some shit about fairy tail, usually he'd either smoothen it out diplomatically or simply freeze that person's ass (unlike natsu who'd jump in with his fists or legs or even his head) to end the argument.

but if he hears as much as a peep about his juvia, he'd be a lot worse than natsu.

he doesn't care if its a harmless rumor. no. as long as its something that tarnishes his adorable water mage, then he'd be throwing hands, not even erza could stop him unless she'd knock him out. (though erza is just a tiny bit behind natsu's temperament, just a tiny, tiiiiiiiny step behind the dragon slayer).

sometimes lucy would have to step in, using virgo to bind him or dig holes to stop him, worse it'd be the leader of the zodiacs—leo or loke—who'd stop him from chasing the poor guy who is running his mouth with whatever about juvia.

he wasn't like that before. nooope. he was calm and would always, aaaaaalways investigate first.

but after he had acknowledged, accepted and finally allowed himself to feel, truly feel his emotions for the beautiful water mage, he became possessive, jealous, protective and absolutely feral for juvia. in every possible way.

he used to think that erza, who would be in bar fights, just because somebody talked shit about fairy tail or impersonated somebody from the guild was downright unreasonable and immature.

used to.

but not anymore, not at least when it comes to his girl.

and if he is bad at keeping his temper in check when it comes to rumors, imagine how worse it would be when he hears somebody who'd talk about her body in a perverse way.

oh natsu and wendy are already scrambling to stop him from using his devil slayer magic, happy is already tearing him from the ground and using his speed to keep the peace, while erza would take care of it in her own way (just knocking their heads with her fist with no damages around).

and when he is jealous, especially when they're enjoying a nice, lovey-dovey date, he tries hard... really, reaaaaally hard, not to ruin it by fighting men who'd stare at his girl.

honestly, he couldn't blame them. she is beautiful. smooth, creamy skin, thick and juicy thighs (and her ass that drives him crazy), long, blue hair like the ocean, cat-like eyes that makes him go feral when they're hazy and hooded from lust, her full and large breasts that are perfect in his rough hands and her face... her absolutely, perfect, pretty, gorgeous face that he thinks is too attractive to be shown in public.

but will he keep her hidden? fuck no. he is strong enough to fight the perverted men who'd try and disrespect her. plus she is strong enough to protect herself (but that doesn't mean he'd allow her pretty hands to get dirty or even allow her to waste her magic on those sick bastards).

so he simply just let her do what she wants, wear what she wants—especially since she dresses for him and for herself—but mostly for his eyes.

and he enjoys it unapologetically.

if she wants to put on some makeup, he'd tell her she looks pretty, give a peck on her lips even if they would stain his with her lip gloss.

if she wants her long legs in display, he'd touch her thighs when they're sitting together so that she knows he noticed them (all the time).

if she wears cropped blouses or shirts that shows her toned belly, his hands would be on her waist (though it usually is most of the time).

so no, he won't stop her from doing whatever because he is strong and she is crazy ass strong as well. (even he is terrified of an angry juvia, just like everybody in the guild—yes, even laxus)

but will he keep his hands to himself? no. his hands are on hers, his fists are on the perverts.

and sometimes, he even enjoys it when she's the one putting those bastards in place.

sometimes its even more terrifying because she'd be all pretty and smiling, but in a blink of an eye, that poor bastard is already encased in a boiling bubble of water. then she'd simply go back to his side, arms around his own, resuming their leisure date around the town of magnolia.

sometimes he'd be smug about it, knowing that he's the one taking her home, that he's the one doing all the perverted shit on her and that she loves every bit of it.

cause everybody thought she's the perverted one.

well, technically, juvia is sometimes lost in her own 'gray-sama daydreams and fantasies'.

but what they don't know was how shy she was during their first time. she was so adorable and flustered, almost melted into puddle, and he was trying his best to be a gentleman and be... well... gentle because its her first and he doesn't want to hurt her.

it drove him insane. she was so soft, so tight, so gorgeous beneath him, that he fought every urge to just slam his throbbing cock repeatedly until she's far gone to even think about anything else.

but after that? they're fucking like rabbits, to the point that he's wondering why he hasn't gotten her pregnant yet. she's feral for him, but he's worse that he'd sometimes have to take a moment before entering their home just to keep his restraint.

and he'd be throwing that out of the window once he walks into their living room, with his lovely girl, wearing nothing but his shirt, her delicious thighs bare, nipples perking beneath, face bare and pretty, all for him.

how could he stop himself? if there is a magic that could, he would use it because she needed to keep her legs functioning. (thank wendy for helping her)

nope. he couldn't stop himself from making her sit on his face or him just kneeling before her and diving straight to taste his delicious meal.

and the sounds that she'd make? they're heavenly. especially when its his name that's on repeat. he doesn't care if others would hear it. actually, he wants them to hear it. wants them to know that he is the very reason she's like that.

he thinks its because they held back for such a looooooong time, which is why he couldn't stop himself, as if he's a poor, deprived man and now he's simply just catching up from the lost time.

and she's also needy, clingy and insatiable as he is. and he loves it when juvia is like that.

when she is pulling him to the bedroom, kissing him, then undressing before him like a damn show he'd watch all day, then with her pretty lips around his cock... he's already too dumb to think about anything else.

or when she's bouncing on his cock, those large tits on full display moving with her movements that he couldn't stop his hands from grabbing them or his lips from sucking them.

and when she's on her fours, ass presented to him, oh he couldn't stop himself from being rough, from spanking those juicy globes until they're red, from admiring her thighs and her small waist.

but what drives him crazy is when she wraps her long legs around his waist. his hands would be caressing them, holding them, placing it over his shoulders. and he knows he'd be asking wendy for a favor the next day to help juvia walk properly because they'd be doing it for hours.

and he won't stop until she is satisfied, until he knows she'd be all jelly to even move, that she'd need his help afterwards to move.

and he loves it, loves the aftercare as much as he loves fucking or making love to her.

and juvia loves every bit of it too. he'd be all soft and gentle with her, handling her like a fine china, so tender when he bathes her or dries her, even has a tiny smile when she's too tired to use her magic to dry her hair so he'd use a hair blower.

and then he'd wrap his arms around her very satisfied body as they sleep, would wake up with either her peppering kisses on him or him eating her out very, very slowly, in the most gentle way, lips and kisses on her clit so soft, wet and cool to alleviate her swollen folds from the way he bullied her pussy the previous night.

sometimes he'd make her breakfast, but she'd stop him with a stern look because its her domain. and gray knows better than to mess with her holy kitchen. he makes up for it by cleaning, although, again she'd be stopping him because she does it better.so does with the laundry or grocery shopping. which makes him feel useless at times.

what would he do? simple. he helps her put away the stuff, he'd deliberately put them in places she can't reach, places that would require her to call for his help. petty, but effective.

he'd bring her fresh flowers, everyday as long as he's not away for a mission with team natsu, or every time he'd come home.

he'd also go on missions with her if she's not with team gajeel.

he'd also talk with her when he's away, with the help of warren's tech and cana's card magic, because he loves to hear her voice, loves to know she is safe and would also keep her at ease. he'd let her ramble on and on about her day or her recent mission, or anything mundane. he doesn't talk much, but he loves to hear her voice the first thing as he wakes up and the last thing before he sleeps.

and he is working hard, harder, to save money, to buy a nice home for them and their future. he wants to save as much money as possible, because he wanted to provide for her, wanted to give her the best life that she deserves as his queen.

he imagines their home... with a garden where she could grow her plants and vegetables, a yard where they could practice and allow their kids to run around, a porch where they could sit together.

it would be beautiful. he knows it will be, as long as its with her.

but for now, he wants to get her a beautiful ring with a big gem, big enough to let others know that she is off the market.

and also, a talk with mira and erza about proposing, though he thinks its much sensible to talk to lucy and wendy or even gajeel (of all people but because juvia is practically like his sister). maybe even pantherlily could give a better advice than the two strongest female mages in the guild because erza might probably be too flustered and mira jane would be... all too mira about it.

maybe not in a few months, but maybe a year from today, or maybe after the hundred year quest.