like stars burning holes right through the dark

Your name is DAVE EGBERT and you are [AGE REDACTED]. You're quite fond of playing VIDEO GAMES, especially old-school stuff like MARIO and DONKEY KONG, though you have a soft spot for POKEMON as well. You also love watching HORRIBLE B-LIST MOVIES in your spare time. You love your TURNTABLES and you spend most of your time MIXING MUSIC on your laptop. You also play the KEYBOARD in your spare time and make some extra cash playing at parties. You once played a game called SBURB with your friends John Strider, Rose Harley and Jade Lalonde, but you don’t really talk about it nowadays. Your chumhandle is troublemakingGenius, though you don't get online very much anymore.