Lives Under a Waterfall

HAVE THAT CHARACTER GAIN WEIGHT AS A SIGN OF HEALING: NOW

some of you people are so annoying. i mean me too but good lord

Happy pride month to the tiny cowboy and tiny Trojan man from Night at the Museum

happy pride month 2021 I ain’t quittin’ you…

New idealogy i call it Alcohol Feminism

they put my blood through every test under the sun and yet nowhere in the pages and pages of lab reports do they tell me what my blood type is

your neutrophils absolute? 2.71. anion gap? why, that's 11! hemoglobin A1C? a solid 5.4. and don't fret, champ—your VLDL (calculated) is a cool 12. real fascinating stuff. hm? what's that? you want to know what kind of blood you have? like, so you won't have to look your next ER nurse in the eye and tell her you have no clue what type you have right after giving her a date of birth that confirms you are over 30 years old? psh, don't be silly! we can't tell you that! it's a ✨secret✨

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

well what can i say. i will like all characters better if theyre women instead of men

tuck him in Tuesday

tuck him in Tuesday once again

another tuck him in Tuesday is here

WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM

Anybody else have no idea how their personality is perceived by others? Like am I nice? Am I mean? I have no idea.

When people tell me stuff about me I literally think about it nonstop for 3-5 business days.

A coworker casually said “everyone else likes you” (because one coworker was mad at me) and I was for real like ????everyone likes me??????

We just not going to talk about how he can also do pottery? With chocolate?

And stickers!

he HAS A not chocolate version of that god damned bowl right there! TAUNTING US, and holding the not pastries kiwis!