It's just a catchphrase

I had a dream recently that I was getting all of my ingredients ready to make a delicious vegetable soup while the broth was being warmed on the stove on low. When I came back, there were TWO small capybaras in my soup pot bathing in the broth. In the dream, I was infuriated. But it’s a very cute image and someone should draw it.

my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old

Three different guys in the same shelf. I repeat. We have three different guys in the same shelf and one of them has his CHEEK MEAT hanging out like it’s nothing

good morning to this taco bell worker and no one else

This feels like a Seinfeld bit

we’re killing our planet

hamg on i gotta find smthn

mine craf

ladies, ladies, please. one at a time with the ray-bans offers