uwu✨

I like when you click a link and it turns purple its like youre bruising it

you’re so fucking spoiled you get to pick out which radiator you get chained to

[doesn't understand jacking off] and I'm supposed to... touch my penis? [shaking my head and smiling, murmuring to myself] touching my own penis... [chuckles] what will they come up with next

Women love me for my glinting eyes and unsettling knowledge of the apocalypse. And fish? Well

*dirty talking* you’ve been a very bad boy and im just going to straight up kill you now

Send me an "if I met you" message in my ask. I'm bored & I wanna know lol

did you have the dream i sent you?

how can i communicate to wild bunnies that i am their ally

I’ve got that neglected dog stare

does anyone like me also my stomach hurts

whenever a mutual posts their pet I want to comment things like "Fuckass thing" "Kill him" But I don't know if they would understand that I mean this in an affectionate way,

in monster world they have berries and cream but they call it SCARIES and SCREAM. one of many interesting little cultural differences

can i pet ur raging boner?