go broncos

I first read matt stone's short essay "why I like math" a little over a year ago and I'm at a loss on what to do with it.

I came across it while doing some research for a post I was entertaining about the dichotomy between south park's public reputation to some degree as an "atheist" show despite having a largely sympathetic, even-handed, and uncharacteristically optimistic tone with respect to its plotlines regarding christianity, faith, and religion -- more than most of its more cynical contemporaries in the adult animation sphere or sitcoms more broadly.

And there's just something about Matt's essay that clicked with me in such a profound way. Trey has a lot of interesting things to say regarding his own personal feelings on God and faith and how that influences the show, but one thing I've noticed a lot of the people I most admire creatively have in common is analogizing the creative process to math, or a fixation with numbers and their relation to each other, the mathematical brain. My own math skills are pretty average -- decent, but certainly nothing to write home about, but I'm also very fixated on the physicality in math and searching for that pattern recognition, very fixated on numbers, how I recognize it in my writing or art on a conscious level when you reach that flow state, and him describing his mathematical proficiency as something deeply spiritual made me have my own Magic Eye moment of you don't, you don't, and then you *do*.

And I think so much of life is about those moments of clarity, and reading this made me have one of them. You don't get them often but the brief euphoria of when you do is... it just is.

if you're talking specifically about the groundbreaking work of fiction that is herbert garrison's night school for unwed fathers, then yes, i have read it lol

mpreg has never quite been my niche but i cannot deny that version of stan and kyle are utterly delightful. the entire exchange between sheila, stan, and kyle in her car is unbearably funny, and stan and kyle themselves are equal parts insufferable yet so endearing -- exactly as they should be.

i love a lot of holly's work. i remember being 19 at my shitty job and taking my smoke break outside while i caught up on a few paragraphs of her fic never change, which might be my favorite of all. she strikes such a good balance between stan's obedience and his passive desperation, and kyle's unwitting standoffish-ness that hinders his ability to express himself.

i'm so glad you enjoy it. i know i wrote it but of everything i've written it's the most special to me and it always boosts my mood when people tell me here or on ao3 that it's meant something to them, really gives me the kick to revisit all my drafts and put something out there