Trading Truths for Lies

That time of night as an adult where you’re desperately tired and want to sleep but you also don’t want to give up the day yet bc there’s stuff you wanna do. I’m calling it the toddler hour

This post came into my bedroom and punched me in the face

I love rebloging. It’s the adult equivalent of showing everyone the cool rock I just found.

can't believe the only options are 30 minutes early or 10 minutes late. if only there were some other way. but what can you do

Yes yes yes this scene thank you for the tag, heehehehe

It’s funny because this scene must be based on the memoir Special Agent by Candis DeLong. In it she describes being out looking at clothes at a department store on lunch break with another female agent and overhearing a conversation between a man and a woman in which he says he’s an FBI agent. They peer around some clothes racks thinking that they’re going to see one of their fellow agents trying to get a date, and when they don’t recognize the guy they go over and pretend to be interested in the big strong FBI agent themselves and ask to see his badge. The guy actually pulled out a fake badge, whereupon they said “Huh, that doesn’t look anything like ours…”, produced their own badges and arrested him for impersonating an FBI agent. (I remember this bit from a 25 year old book because I actually stole it myself for a fic)

Exquisite. Glorious. 10/10 thank you for sharing.

reblog if you remember having to ration your text messages and accidentally opening the internet on your phone was the end of the world

“you couldn’t make this movie today” not because of cancel culture but because big studios aren’t willing to take risks on cool fun new ideas instead of adaptation number 7,000

people have suddenly started reblogging this post of mine from february 8th, 2012. great bit everybody

the most important virtues for the young woman are as follows: time theft, selfishness, orgasms, irreverence to authority, sacrilegious behavior, a questioning mind, and eating regular meals.

severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person

when I say “be safe” I say that shit from the bottom of my heart