cauliflower is on the way

So as we all know the gang is currently on a lil’ break between campaigns, but i don’t think that’s a good reason to deprive y’all of my genius* insight**! And so, for that reason I shall bless*** you all with my very important**** post.

*insane / **ramblings / ***curse / ****unnecessary

Note: This post will be a miscellaneous compilation of… anything. If it doesn’t make sense, you’re correct. I just miss posting.

That being said…

Chapter I: Please, Mr. Poe Was My Father…

Veksilius

A dragon fixed and a dragon torn, With a spear in hand and a pair of horns. A dragon furred and a dragon shorn, In an alternate universe, a vial isn't mourned.

Some dragon carrots and dragon corn, Thanksgiving in Khoarexia would happen in the morn, Dragon Freya and Dragon Bjorn, Scandinavia isn't real, what a shame... what a thorn...

I hope in the future the world will remember, A legend, a folk's tale, a story well-worn, The people who's passion is strong as the ember, Each day brings another, a dragon is born.

Vev after 2 1/2 Vodka Cranberries

RD

Domo Arigato, Uh Oh.

Fuck they see me.

Wait let me pick this back up in a-

RD Take 2

Slash and hash my way through life, A dragon on the left, a wolf on the right, Strife.

Etched and sketched on the strings of my heart, Sharpen my claws on the corpses I fight, Shart.

RD tried to help writing, Dead.

Luciano and RD Collaboration

Chapter II: Mitski Once Said...

Eiwn

Daezonik

Zai

Azure

(but fully melted you get it)

Alto

Chapter III: I Like My Ways How I Like My Women

Mean Girls

Regina George: Archfey Warlock Gretchen Wieners: Whispers Bard Karen Smith: Zealot Barbarian Cady Heron: Alchemist Artificer Janis Ian: Assassin Rogue Damian Leigh: Glamour Bard

Hamilton

Alexander Hamilton: Scribes Wizard Aaron Burr: Eldritch Knight Fighter Angelica: Storm Sorcerer Eliza: Peace Cleric and Peggy: Mutant Blood Hunter Thomas Jefferson: Eloquence Bard The Bullet: Soulknife Rogue

Six

Catherine of Aragon: Creation Bard Anne Boleyn: Fiend Warlock Jane Seymour: Devotion Paladin Anna of Cleves: Berserker Barbarian Katherine Howard: Life Cleric Catherin Parr: Astral Self Monk

Bonus Round: RuPaul's Drag Race

The Hilarious Ross Matthews: Lycan Blood Hunter Carson Kressley: Fey Wanderer Ranger Ts Madison: Gunslinger Fighter Michelle Visage: Fiend Warlock RuPaul: Great Old One Warlock

I hope this post was incredibly insightful <3

shaking, crying? yelling? what am i meant to do with this knowledge? is it a sin to share to the masses? could this all be a lie? i feel like moses or some shit rn idk.

evocation - class swap! change all (or some) of the pcs classes around to something else. explain your reasoning.

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A good old fashioned class swap for my good old fashioned audience. Easy enough, but I'll try to think up some extra wacky combinations this time. Actually, let's go one step further and think up some new subclasses too!

Eiwn I'm thinking that some of her affinity for special plants and summoning her animal steed might mean she could fit well as a Druid. On top of that, she is named after a mushroom... How about we give her some fun flavor with the Circle of Spores Druid? She'll get some fun necrotic abilities and have a sort of undead vibe going for her, and I feel like she'd lean into that HARD.

Ma'el Guys, I swear I'm really funny for this right... no but hear me out: Blood Hunter Order of the Lycan... EVERYONE STOP I HEAR YOU ALL SAYING LESTER is he not enough of a DOG for you already. Well point number one: him being an actual werewolf would be really funny for the bit. Point number two: I looked into it and there's technically nothing stopping you from using Shifter features and Lycan features at the same time. That means not only can you be a werewolf, you can be an even beastlier fucking werewolf so I am begging you all to hear me out.

RD The Adversary, Destroyer of Everyone, Angel of the Endless Night, Great Beast That is Called Dragon, Prince of Another World, Father of Claws, Spawn of Metrilun, and Lord of the Moon... RD [Neil Gaiman, what are you doing in my post?]. I'm actually being very silly with this and going in an entirely different direction for Red. Imagine her as an Armorer Artificer. Their metallic body could become something that they're able to control and give cool abilities to, adaptable to killing but also being sneaky. It'd be really different to what he does now while still building off of their pre-existing flavour.

Miym Had a harder time thinking of something for her at first, but something ended up being a perfect fit in my opinion: Order of Scribes Wizard! Wizards carry around spellbooks all the time, and the Order of Scribes lets you add a smidge of sentience to that book. Miym is always using her notebook to communicate with other, so leveling it up sounds like something really cool! (Plus she gets to fling a shit ton of spells because she deserves it).

Pall'or Everybody's favourite doctor (if you don't ask for Lily's opinion). So doctor's swear an oath right? I'm not going to google that, but I'm pretty sure they do. Whatever the oath is, I don't think this mfer is following it, Oathbreaker Paladin baby. He'd still have access to some healing abilities as a paladin, even immunity to disease! However he gets to add on a little bit of freakness which I think he deserves!

Alastrelle Last but not least, purple elf. Given recent events that have altered their powers in unexpected ways, I think a fun new thing for Alastrelle would be Shadow Magic Sorcerer. They've already flavoured most of their starry powers to have a shadowy vibe instead, so imagine it as a new fate. Also dogs. You can summon dogs. Dogs are cool.

TDLR; Eiwn - Circle of Spores Druid Ma'el - Order of the Lycan Blood Hunter RD - Armorer Artificer Miym - Order of Scribes Wizard Pall'or - Oathbreaker Paladin Alastrelle - Shadow Magic Sorcerer

I hope you all enjoyed my take on the class swap! Feel free to send anymore asks, but I'll be signing off for tonight (off to the mansions of rest). I hope we'll all be tuned in this Saturday for a fun new session.

divination - favourite session and why?

bard - songs you associate with any of the dldnd characters?

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Alright let’s start with divination. I love having PC interactions and hearing what these little shits have to say to each other. I’d say most recently i’ve been thinking about “the rain session” a lot. One person’s actions having unbelievable consequences somewhere else makes my brain unbelievably rotten.

🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶

Next we have bard for which I have compiled a little list of songs for each of the players in the campaign’s deadly game. And Luciano.

Ma’el - Hound Dog by Big Mama Thornton

Pall’or - Mad Hatter by Melanie Martinez

Miym - Don’t Speak by No Doubt

Eiwn - The Moss by Cosmo Sheldrake

RD - Bad Reputation by Joan Jett and The Blackhearts

Alastrelle - Good Morning Starshine from Hair

Bad Luck - Choke by IDK HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

Lily - Tired by Kelly Price

Luciano - Money, Money, Money by ABBA

Sorry for the little delay on answering these asks, I’ve been a little busy working on campaign prep of my own 😎 I’ve got a lovely little group and they are always very creative with what they do with their characters so I gotta be extra careful with them 😭

heeheehee i mean yeah i’ve got a few things, but also they only recently got subclasses (most of them) so idk

alastrelle’s seems pretty obvious, they pretty much used their main subclass thing and i don’t think they’re trying to hide it (quite literally shining bright) [circle of stars druid]

river just straight up said their subclass, some hints beforehand but hey, they do what they do [wild magic sorcerer]

everyone else is kinda ???

RD is a barbarian, we know that but i’m not too sure if what we’ve seen them do is subclass related or homebrew, so for now [path of sickass barbarian]

pall’or is a cleric and i’ve got an idea based off of two things. 1 - nox described their channel divinity as twilight and 2 - moonbeam is a twilight domain spell, so my spidey sense says that [twilight domain cleric]

miym is a case to me. still hard to figure out because i don’t think they’ve used many bard features, but that seems to be what’s going on there. the spells they’ve used are definitely bard spells though so it seems fine. no clue for subclass tho [college of bird bard idfk]

i’ve got ideas? for a lot of the stuff going on? i don’t even know where i would start like what do i even expose.

- new mfer on the island? river briefly pointed out that they had a yellow heart, did they already die? fuck going on. likely at least one more person on the island, and i don’t think it’s the blue haired pronouns mfer rd is speaking to.

- hey speaking of rd, something’s highly off? and i mean it in the way of things seem, very different to what they know. almost too different. maybe rd doesn’t know as much as we think they do?

- miym is a part of this somehow? but why. i don’t know if we have the full picture yet.

- ma’el’s gloves? is he under control? what’s going awn. as a critical role watcher sorcerer’s scare me now. the scary little killer, hidden somewhere beneath the silly little guy. ma’el, the one they call the ultimate ticking time bomb. watch out for him.