someone: Rey is so obviously a Skywalker!!! What will you say when it’s revealed?

Most of the posts I’ve seen so far remember and praise Carrie Fisher for always being fearless, for speaking her mind without shame, for not being afraid to age or expose herself or whatever, and while we absolutely must draw inspiration from that, I think it’s a somehow erroneous message. If you’ve read her books, you know the opposite is true. She was insecure, and afraid, she had body image issues from a young age, the digs from the media and the public about her body or her life did hurt, she always talked in a self-deprecatory way about herself (yes, to be funny, but that’s also the mark of someone who’s really very insecure), she never believed she could be a cool, popular girl. And on top of that, she had a mental illness and addictions that accentuated all those feelings.

Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength.

Date someone who meets you half way. Date someone who brings you a glass a water when they get themselves one. Date someone who makes sure you don’t spend money on ridiculous things. Date someone your ex hates and your mom loves. Date someone who’d rather spend a Friday night watching movies, than out with 50 people they barely even talk to. Date someone who sleeps on your chest and leaves a little puddle of drool. Don’t date someone who makes you leave oceans of tears.