"It's Giving Me The Death Giggles"

And it pisses me off because when characters are cis it's silence (naturally). When characters are trans it's Opinion Hour and there's no way of having this culture in a way that doesn't wrap around to being transphobic :(

I think it being up in the air for most of the series exacerbates it. Everyone has a Different Interpretation and getting canonized is seen as "winning."

I think it's mildly weird (although still not actually harmful) to headcanon, say, a trans woman as a trans man if that's the case from the start, but when something like TADC or Deltarune could go either way for awhile not only are people going to come up with headcanons that turn out to be wrong later but I also see that situation more as an AU situation, where you're depicting a version of canon that went differently than it did IRL.

Genuinely I don't feel like the trans community has ever had to meaningfully reckon with exorsexism. There's all this fucking yapping about smashing the gender binary and how cool and sexy this androgynous (cis) rockstar is, but when it comes down to it people want to cling to the binary. Because it affirms their own gender. Because it allows them to bond with cis people. Because it makes them feel normal and real and natural. Binary trans people oftentimes only want to challenge the parts of the gender binary that directly impede THEIR ability to socially claim womanhood/manhood, but will not actually challenge it anywhere else.

It comes back to the fact that cissexism and the patriarchy itself are built on the gender binary & oppositional sexism, but a lot of binary trans people (particularly those who pass and are gender conforming), knowingly or not, have this attitude of "but why do THEY (cis people) get to play with that, and I don't???" Because they are men/women, and all those OTHER men and women can simply float on the exorsexist social current without ever thinking twice about it.

There is inherently some exorsexism in all transphobia, but if you can narrate yourself and your experiences through the language of the binary, you get a level of social acceptance that other trans people (including many, many binary/-aligned trans people, and intersex people) do not. And that's why binary aligned trans people then turn around and start blaming nonbinary people and GNC trans people and anyone who continues inflaming exorsexist society for how trans people are treated.

Because to be cis is to be binary, and so, so much of trans activism has been about telling cis people that we are just like them—just regular men and women, trapped in the opposite sex body. And nonbinary people fundamentally cannot and generally will not do that. We are asking cis people to respect us and acknowledge that our genders are just as valid even if they are completely foreign to cis people, even if they are undeniably, fundamentally trans in a way that cannot be renegotiated into cisness.

That is not to say that binary trans people are less radical or less trans—there are many binary trans people I know and love who fucking hate the idea of conforming to cisness in any way. And they get fucked over by exorsexism big time. The language I'm using here (nonbinary vs binary) is itself fundamentally flawed given the actual complexity of exorsexism, but I'm feverish so I'm unfortunately not going to invent an improved paradigm in this post.

My point is that I tried so damn hard to make myself make sense to binary people. I spent years of my life knowing I was trans and torturing myself because no matter what I came out as, I always felt like a liar, nothing ever fit. I tried to be a nonbinary lesbian the way everyone wants, I tried to be a trans man in the way everyone wants, I tried to be neutral but y'know not making a big deal out of it or anything (and of course neutral people don't have any sexuality, because the minute you have a sexuality you have to align yourself with the binary, hence the "not making a big deal out of it"). I tried and tried and tried to not be a thorn in the side of the exorsexism that's so prevalent not just in society but in the trans community, I tried not to make my gender a problem for everyone. I only felt real stability and safety and humanity in myself through my gender once I let myself be how I actually am and quit cherrypicking my identity based around what wouldn't upset the implicit but STRONG gender binary in trans spaces. And it's really just so frustrating seeing binary trans people who don't ever think for a second about any of this, and even more other nonbinary people who are able to narrate themself in a way that appeals to exorsexism, all of whom act like nonbinary people who can't or won't do that are just causing problems for fun.

My rat Blue Jay is in need of surgery to remove a mammary tumor. I usually use CareCredit but since I’ve been using it for my rats for years I’ve uh… accumulated a lot of debt on my card. I have $470 available to spend on my card. I currently have around $200 to my name and don’t get paid for another 2 weeks. Blue Jay’s surgery is estimated between $638 and $1,247.

I don’t have enough to get her the surgery.

Blue Jay is such a sweet girl (she was covering the vet’s hand in kisses while he was doing the exam) and still full of life, but this tumor will rapidly drain her life. I’m trying to do everything I can to not let that happen.

So I’m posting this GoFundMe. I know there are much bigger problems in the world right now, and other people are facing much worse, but if you can donate even just $1 to save this sweet little girl’s life I would forever appreciate it. She doesn’t deserve to die early. If you can’t spare anything, please consider reblogging this post so more people could possibly help.

There’s a video of Blue Jay (and her friends) for tax below the break, tumor and all. If the tumor freaks you out, there’s some older picture of her above it, without the tumor.

We’re currently at $398 of my intended $1000 goal. Once that money transfers I’m going to go ahead and schedule the surgery and see if I can split the payment between CareCredit and what I have. Part of the quoted estimate included a spay and x-rays so, unless more donations come in soon, I’m going to decline those so that I can afford just the mass-removal surgery with what I have.

If you haven’t yet, and are able, please consider donating a small bit or just sharing to help me get her the spay as well (so the tumor doesn’t come back) or, at least pay off some of the CareCredit debt so that if something else comes up soon (I have… 7 rats 🫠) I will be ready this time.

Here’s pictures of Blue Jay eating a little cookie with me right now:

Choke. Just think about it, seriously. Think about what choking is and imagine speaking while it’s happening. That would fuckin’ hurt, man.

Hiss. Look, it’s just not possible, okay? No matter how “evil” you want your character to seem.

Snarl. Animals snarls. The Beast from Beauty and the Beast snarls. The Hulk snarls. You know who doesn’t snarl? PEOPLE WHEN THEY’RE SPEAKING.

Shriek. Come on, 99% of the time, “shriek” is not the word you want.Let’s face it: if you put an exclamation point at the end of the sentence, your reader gets the picture. Don’t bring to mind banshees and screaming toddlers.

Hiss is a low, threatening whisper. Raw, guttural, vicious. It is NOT a literal hiss like an animal, it is a tone of voice that serves the same function. Someone will hiss that they’re going to cut your throat- a message from one person to the other.

Snarl is the same kind of thing. Not literal, it’s a tone of voice that serves the same function. It’s raw and gutteral like a hiss, but more savage than vicious. It’s loud, it’s showy, it’s intimidating. It’s very alpha male, big man, look at how fucking dangerous I am. I’ll take ALL of you on. Even if they’re snarling at one person in particular, nobody better back them up or they’re gonna get fucked up too.

Shriek. Come on, seriously? We’ve all heard people shriek either in fear or outrage. High pitched, loud, out of control, feminine. Men can shriek, but it’s funny and emasculating. Think angry italian women throwing pots and pans or ladies on tables who just saw a mouse.

Here are some basic primers. If someone is wearing what look like Meta glasses, they usually have a small circular camera in the outer corners of the lenses, like the one on your phone.

I would also regularly check their own product pages so you're on top of what the models look like. They tend to have larger frames, but come in a variety of shapes and colors.

A new hobbyist developed app warns if people nearby may be wearing smart glasses, such as Meta’s Ray-Ban glasses, which stalkers and harassers have repeatedly used to film people without their knowledge or consent. The app scans for smart glasses’ distinctive Bluetooth signatures and sends a push alert if it detects a potential pair of glasses in the local area.

The American Foundation for the Blind has said that "The Ray-Ban Meta glasses are an accessibility tool only by coincidence. That makes them more affordable and, in many ways, unaware of the needs of users with reduced vision" although they do have seemingly positive views on Meta Glasses as a whole. (source 10). It also seems like their marketing push as accessibility devices began last year (source 11).

But to add even more into the nonsense, Meta is now toying around with adding a "limit" to the functionality of their glasses unless their users pay for more access (source 12). AND, as stated above, Meta has officially added facial recognition code in their glasses and only admitted it after being called out, which is basically the death of privacy as we know it (source 13, source 14, source 15). And oh look another lawsuit because of it (source 16) THAT THEY LOST (source 17)!

Long story short: I don't begrudge someone using them as a disability aid overall, but ultimately both their privacy and other people's privacy are being disregarded by Meta and that is not and should not be acceptable by any means.

I understand there is no ethical consumption under capitalism but there is a level of personal responsibility someone has to take when using them if they truly truly need them, such as opting out of sharing information, not filming strangers without permission, not posting footage of strangers online, opting out of facial recognition if possible, etc.