Topher Romijn

Staring at their little apartment, now them as the sole inhabitant, Topher wondered about what was next for them. Life had seemed interesting when they had first arrived in Astoria, young, adventurous, angry. Being homeless had grown stale, but more importantly dangerous. Life had offered them chances: a job, a home, money. And all of that seemed bland.

Bland while there was so much out there. Yes, Astoria meant understanding for them. They had changed into someone without meaning to, and that still haunted them. But it didn’t make life more exciting. Life was, in a sense, boring.

And Topher had no idea what their future would bring. Yet for the first time ever, they wanted to create a future for themselves. They wanted to be someone, do something.

But where and what?

Topher had always thought they had no family in Belgium to go back to. And that much was still true. Yet that didn’t frighten them at all. Despite not having spoken the language in years, they still knew Flemish. They didn’t have a high school diploma, but they knew how to get one.

They looked at the website on their phone.

This time of year, it had to be a split second decision. Second semester started in January, they could still enrol, take up less credits. They were a Belgian citizen, no parents, school wouldn’t cost them more than a hundred euro’s a year. Maybe they could contact some family, get a place to stay.

It was in a sense an adventure.

They had many options on what to study: veterinarian, mechanic, police officer, anything.

Things they liked doing. Futures.

―

It had been some time together, the two of them, but none so long that he had grown tired of the duck’s antics but rather found himself amused by the way it seemed different than others. Bash nodded with a grin. “Yes, waddled. Much better word than walked,” he agreed as he watched them for a moment longer. “I have not either. But I am patient and Dog is stubborn. It works between us that they allow me to carry them so that we do not have to waddle everywhere or else Dog would have to stay back. And as you can see, they very much would rather be here in the thick of things than miss out.” Not to mention that when Dog was at the bar, the attention was solely on the duck which seemed to suit the duck just fine if not thrive under the many pairs of eyes on him. Even now, they shifted closer towards the other in hopes of more watercress and attention.

“They’re a watch dog,” Topher said, smiling, looking back at Bash, although their eyes constantly found the little white perked creature on the bar. “They’re very regal like that,” they shared. “Could I come back some time to feed Dog again?” they asked, giving the duck another piece of watercress and still refraining from petting them. Perhaps next time. “I need to go or else risk someone taking my spot at the shelter,” they said. 

“Too many, if you ask me,” Dean kidded. He loved his sisters, of course, but being a part of a family of that size had a few consequences. One of which was his phone blowing up, involuntary stuck in a group text, or generic responsibilities that came with being a big brother when his parents weren’t available. “Nope, just me. One of my sisters wanted to, but after a few years of me being gone, she decided against it.” Dean nodded. Salads and fruits sounded about right. He almost felt dumb for asking. “That’s nice.” Turning his head towards the waiter, he briefly looked towards the menu again before asking for a club sandwich. “I’ll cover the check,” he mused as he held the menu patiently. “Is it safe? The shelter?” Dean swallowed. He had heard mentions of the shelter, but he’d never visited the location. With his siblings outgrowing clothes and neglecting foods, he always wondered if shelters were a good place to donate. “Like, is it warm and stuff?”

“Hmm, because of the danger?” they asked. “I don’t understand why people go to war, not that I … I don’t mean to sound like I have an opinion about it that goes against you. But war seems so often about hurting others. Even if people go because they want to help other people…” They stopped talking then. They weren’t against violence, but when it was useless it was useless. Topher didn’t like that Dean suggested covering the check, so, in a very Topher like fashion, they offered words in response. “I’ll pay next time,” they said, firmly. “Of course,” they said matter of factly. “It’s full a lot though. But the food is good, and the beds are soft, and the people are nice,” they said. They didn’t like how shelters were showing on television. They weren’t bad, they were good places, just more curfew and more rules. But good places to stay nonetheless.

tuaharjuna​:

Tuah stepped into the store and headed towards the aisles where they kept snacks and alcohol, humming to himself to the tune that was playing over the store absentmindedly. He didn’t know the title of the song, per se, but the tune was catchy and easy enough to follow along. He had planned to invite Sahid to his place for a movie night, though he hadn’t exactly invited them officially yet. It was a spur of the moment sort of thought, wanting to spend the night unwinding after a long day at work. And then he thought that perhaps he could spend the time with one of his friends, and Sahid came to mind while he was still thinking the sort of movie that he should be watching for the evening.

He thought about perhaps he should prepare dinner for them too, thinking Sahid was all skin and bones from what he could tell. He wasn’t a great cook, however, seeing that he didn’t have a sense a taste. He could follow the recipe he found on the internet, sure, but he wouldn’t know what it would taste like. So it would be best to order from somewhere he knew would taste good based on the reviews he read online. Or perhaps that Indian place where they had their brunch together the first time they met.

He was in the process of texting Sahid, taking out his phone from the inner pocket of his jacket, when he heard the ruckus in the same aisle he was in. Tuah watched with wide eyes the sudden transformation, from two individuals to the two identical ones standing just a few feet from him, before the clone (he assumed they were a shapeshifter) ran away after dropping everything in their hand. His brows furrowed, walking towards the man as he pocketed his phone, momentarily forgetting about his plan as he helped the man up.

Once he was sure that the man was alright, Tuah followed to where the crowd was forming, murmuring between themselves about the same man trying to hide himself between the women’s clothing section. He slipped between the crowd and asked the security to disperse the crowd, volunteering himself to handle the man (telling them that he recognised the man, which was technically true). He then thanked them for their help before crouching in front of the man as they tried to hide themselves further.

“Hey,” Tuah called out, hearing the stifled sobs between the row of clothing. “I’m Tuah, by the way. What’s your name?” he figured he’d start with something easy, hoping to help the other to get their bearing and calm them down a little. “Would you like me to call someone for you?”

Aleyna was aware by now of how frustrating not shifting into her wolf form could be, part of herself just wanted to find a cozy and safe spot in town, to remain as far as possible from others but during her path she ended up by the mall, trying to find some peace in a crowded place sounded odd but it was where her body led her to.

Despite the lack of transformation she’d face a couple of hours later, she could still noticed the heartbeat of someone else, the terror and her eyes landed at someone that she didn’t know but that seemed to be in distress. Despite everything she was going through herself, Aleyna made her way closer, trying to respect their personal space but still aiming for their shoulder to question. “Are you okay? Do you need anything?” If they wanted to be left alone, she’d do so. But at that moment, she couldn’t help but ask, try to be helpful in anyway.

Topher hadn’t changed in a long time, using their ability only when they felt like it was strictly necessary. Over the course of their years since figuring out they had the same ability as their mom, they must’ve changed only four times a year, when the situation called for it. A way of escape, a way of protecting themselves from others. 

Their mom had used it to earn money, and while she was amazing at it, a skill that Topher had always envied, it had also gotten her killed. It made Topher very aware of the fact that if they had enough control over it, that would never be them. They could avoid the worst if they stayed away from using the faces of others. It didn’t take away being observant however, silent and studious of the appearances of others. Even if they didn’t use it, shifting shape was still something they were aware they could do. So if they honed their skill of observing, they could change their own shape quickly enough.

Going to the store with Rowan was supposed to be a fun outing, the two of them getting some stuff they absolutely didn’t need, paying as little money as possible by getting all the discounts. 

It wasn’t supposed to be terror inducing. 

Topher wasn’t sure what part of their body was responsible for the sudden change, the complete change, but it was jarring and scary. Just a single touch and no observation necessary, their body changed on its own. 

Changed and became this manly shape that clung to them heavily, pressed itself on their own body like a virus. They felt warm and awkward, kicking away from the person who had forced this change upon them, crying out in surprise, throwing their shoppings to the floor. 

It felt invasive, terrifying, their body wasn’t their own anymore, because they tried to change back, tried to force their tinier frame back through the bulky male form they had borrowed, but no matter how hard they pushed, it stayed on them. It stayed and kept pressing them down. 

Topher never cried, but the tears found their way to their cheek regardless, more out of frustration than sadness. Frustration and fright. They didn’t want this shape. Pushing away from the people, Topher ran down the aisle, trying to find a place to hide, eventually hiding out under a row of clothing, feeling even more frustrated because their new bigger shape didn’t allow for perfect camouflage, long legs sticking out. This was stupid, this needed to stop. They brushed the tears away, angry at the large hand, angry at the beard. They tried to will their body, a constant battle with a wall that gave no way. 

Carleigha nodded in understanding. She’d had her fair share of run-ins with humans who were appalled by her existence and a fair share of those who were intrigued by it. Once or twice they begged to be turned, for no other reason than they wanted that life, a life they truly couldn’t understand. There were still some who accepted what she was without fear or over-interest. There were good and bad of all species that she’d found. Vampires who lived for peace but also those who lived for chaos. Werewolves who loved the hunt, the beast and others who hated it. A strange duality to the world, though she wasn’t sure if they balanced eachother out. “Some do, I guess that’s why this place exists but compared to the rest of the world most don’t. I think its more that they don’t like that someone has more power than them, even if its not used against them. Anything that’s different makes them afraid and they lash out. Atleast here there’s more understanding” 

Topher nodded. “Yes, we are much better off here,” they agreed. “I am glad this place exists, my mom used to tell me about it, I think she was planning on getting us here eventually, because it was better for us both, but I also think she didn’t want to take me out of school so suddenly. I wish she had though,” they said, growing a little more sullen. “I think if she had she might’ve still been alive.” They hugged their backpack for a moment. “Or maybe she didn’t want to leave Belgium because it reminded her of my dad.” They smiled again at that thought. “Like how some items are laced with memories, so places can be too.” 

~*~*~

The coffee thrust in his direction was what truly drew his attention in his otherwise mindless stroll, glancing from the to go cup to the person who was extending it. “Hi, Topher,” he returned, gesturing vaguely towards the coffee, “for me?” He’d only seen Topher a time or two since they’d gotten into town, still recalling that time they’d been sitting, soaking wet, in a booth at the diner. But now they seemed a bit more put together, which was nice to see; perhaps they’d gotten their feet under them. “To what do I deserve such an honor?” he said, sort of jokingly, as he took the cup.

“Oh, I have money now,” Topher explained, as if that was all they needed to say to explain for the extra cup of coffee. “More money that usual,” they added. They held up their own cup and pretended to do a clink of glasses, before taking a sip from the drink that still didn’t taste good. “How have you been?” they asked, they didn’t think they were friends with Derrick or anything, but he was nice and they felt like returning some kindness to other people if they could. 

—

“I guess it depends on how you treat them? Or how long you’ve had them.” He explained. “Also, some types of cats are calmer and more affectionate than others, but yeah, in general, they’re more independent.” Which was why Leon liked having them around. It sort of made it easier for him to go to work knowing his kids could handle themselves. Plus, Tiger was much more independent and sociable than King ever were. Leon could count in his fingers of one hand the amount of people King had warmed up to. “Oh yeah? That’s awesome, Topher! Feels nice to have your own place? And weird how?”

“Which is why I like cats more,” Topher shared. “But I love dogs equally, if they ever ask. The dogs that is. Maybe it also depends on the person. I think cats like to be wanted, but also like to play hard to get. So if you play hard to get in return, they will like you more,” they shared. But that was mostly just… Topher’s brain trying to make sense of cats. They never had a pet themselves, so they always tried to befriend animals in the neighborhood. “Yeah, I guess. I don’t know, I think I like it, but I didn’t mind the alternative either till… yeah, no it is funny. Oh, I don’t know if I should tell you this,” they said, biting their lip. “She has been a raccoon all her life… she’s a shapeshifter, so she… likes to borrow other people’s stuff instead of having her own. So we… uhm, it is actually a lot of fun, we are very free.” 

▬

“You know what helps? When you don’t give a shit about it,” Charlotte replied, a smile resting over her lips before she ended up chuckling. “Whenever people discover that I’m actress or are already hyped up that they are meeting an actress over a date, it’s their own problem the idea of placing me in this pedestal, I have no intentions of meeting that standard. And– In a sense, yes, it’s for the best to wait and get to know someone, but it’s pointless if you think about the fact you can’t never truly know a person. There’s always something others will keep to themselves, and I’m not even talking about secrets,” but that was also part of the list. 

Charlotte didn’t know if Topher wanted her point of view about everything they talked on their way to the bar, but at least now she’d have a beer. “Bash has a duck called Dog? That’s pretty unique,” did she know that? If she did, it was something she didn’t focus on. “I have a cat and a dog, but I didn’t name them after different animals. I named them after gods, well, you met Loki.” Tapping her fingers against the counter, she nodded. “Okay, what would you prefer to drink?”

Topher chuckled at that. “Maybe I should do that too.” They said it in jest, but they already did that a lot, held back, didn’t care much what others thought of them, unless if they thought they were helpless, because they were not. They grinned when Charlie said something about putting her on a pedestal because she was an actress. Because they did that too, or maybe not as much because they didn’t fool themselves into think they were friends or something. “Oh yeah, that’s… kind of normal. I think nobody can know another person completely. You always have your own idea of another person, they’ll always fit into your… uhm, world view?” 

They nodded. “Yes, and Dog is very adorable, he doesn’t bite and also you can pet him without problem.” They looked up with wide eyes at the mention of Loki - although they mostly knew the Marvel comic book version. “Yes, the dog, what is the cat called?” they asked. They looked at the menu, although they would drink what Charlie wanted to drink, they figured making some effort to make a decision of their own was a good idea. “Uhm, this one looks good,” they said, pointing at a name that looked French.

“Oh yeah, my mom was a fabulous cook. Something that must be genetic, because I most definitely didn’t inherit that skill.” Ashling mused, smile tugging at her features. “Do you remember any of her recipes? Do you make them now?” The halfling asked curiously, head tilting. She hoped she wasn’t prying. But the other brunette had brought it up, so she didn’t think they’d mind the questions. 

“Wait, you can dance?” Ashling lit up at that, sitting a little straighter. “Okay, you have to teach me too.” Ash was all long, awkward limbs, and sometimes even being graceful while walking was a hard task. She definitely could not dance. But she’d definitely be interested in getting a few lessons, if Topher was willing to share the newly acquired knowledge. “You would?” People usually weren’t overly amused by Ashling’s collection of curious items, so the fact that Topher actually seemed happy to take it was exciting and the witch lit up, offering it to them. “It’s all yours!” She grinned. 

Topher shook their head. “No, I didn’t pay a lot of attention, but she liked to try out a lot of dishes, I think most of them were Indonesian or Congolese, so maybe I can look them up at the internet. I wouldn’t know how to cook them myself though, she did a lot at like… you know, just throw some herbs in and see how it tastes, but yet it always was good. I think she had a talent or just years of practice,” they shared. “What kind of things did your mom cook?” 

“Oh… yes, but not so good. I learned like… uhm, swaying or something, and a twirl.” They stood then, and held out an arm to Ashling. Finally a chance to see if they actually picked up the twirl as well as Laurel had taught them. When Ashling asked if they really wanted the stick, Topher nodded firmly. They knew it was just a stick, but while it might be just a stick, it was a gift from someone else. They would have to tell Rowan not to eat it or move it somewhere else. Perhaps it was best to keep it in their backpack. They slipped that off their shoulder so they could hold the stick in there. “Thank you.” 

▬

“Let me know if it works. I mean– they usually end up just awkwardly dancing to the rhythm of the song, which is also valid.” It was their own way of expressing how the music playing would make them feel and Laurel wouldn’t be the one to judge them loudly. It was different when it was someone pretending to know how to dance only to impress her. That would often end badly and they’d end up embarrassing themselves in front of her. “Oh, the twirl… just hold their hand gently,” and with that Laurel grabbed Topher’s hand, “motion their body counter clockwise, so once they’ve made a full turn,” she slowly passed by every instruction shared with words by exchanging them through actions as well, “you’ll be able to hold them close again to continue dancing without losing the tempo. And then you could either move back and forth or left and right.” She chuckled, “it seems difficult, but it’s actually pretty simple. But, okay, should we head back downstairs, finish our conversation so we can settle all of this once and for all?” With that, the witch offered a smile at them.

They grinned. “I usually end up awkwardly swerving to the beat as well,” they admitted. “Or I just sit and watch because I don’t know how to move without looking weird.” They wished they had more trust in their own ability like Laurel had. “Do you go dancing in clubs a lot?” they asked. “Do you… do you meet people who can match you in dancing?” Topher followed Laurel’s instructions carefully, paying attention only to the movements, not to the closeness of bodies. It had been a long time since they had been really close to someone else. They had friends, yes, but Topher prided themselves in keeping people at a distance, they noticed they enjoyed the closeness. They figured they understood it to a point, though they would need to put it into practice to make sure they had. Which wouldn’t happen that day, because Laurel reminded them of why they were there. “Oh, yes,” they said, smiling, and putting a step back and away from Laurel. “That sounds good.” 

―

          “Nearly two years. They walked into my life and have not left yet, though I fear that it has to do with knowing there are treats for them here,” he jested as he watched the duck snap at the lettuce in the other’s hands but with enough care not to bite at the other’s fingers. The duck was smart enough to know not to bite the hand that feeds them, though it had little to do with the noises that it would make to ensure that their opinion must be known. “Yet I would like to think that they are here because they choose to be.” And that Bash had some hand in that even as the duck seemed to enjoy the company of others that came through the brewery and his life. Atlas was special to Dog as were they special to Bash.

“Oh, that’s… a long time.” They pressed their lips together. “Do you mean… they waddled into your life?” they joked. “A duck to my heart, I would stay too if I knew there were snacks.” Although, that wasn’t completely true, after all, Topher was very used to eating very little. Topher couldn’t help the giggle that escaped them when Dog took the leaves that Bash had called watercress. They waited as the duck ate, then grinned as he quacked its appreciation. “I think they are, he seems to really trust on you… I say that only because they allowed you to carry it. I haven’t seen a single duck that does that.”

―

           “I was thinking about it. Actually I was trying to find something that wasn’t the same clothes that I always wear, you know? There’s one thing to feel comfortable and another to feel worn out,” she told the other with a small smile as she glanced back at the sweaters that looked cozy and inviting. “Are you planning to check them out yourself? I might go in with you if you are. Not that I have much practice in shopping with others, it seems to be what most people are doing these days.” Zoey let out a laugh then, considering everyone else was there with their friends or families while she’d come alone. It was typical, considering that she didn’t have much of either outside of the pack and a few friends that she hadn’t thought to ask to join her. 

“I think it depends on the type of clothing… but maybe because I’m used to second hand. I have this shirt for about six years now, I wash it a lot, but I’ve also mended it, I like it,” they said, pointing at the shirt under their parka. “Yes,” they said, biting their lip. “Even though I don’t need a sweater… I kind of like these,” they added, then offered Zoey a laugh of their own. “I haven’t shopped together with other people in a long time, aside from my roommate, but she doesn’t buy a lot of things, she just likes to try out all the samples. “Do you do shopping with the pack sometimes?” they asked.

“Oh wow.” Ashling’s head tilted when the other mentioned their mother wasn’t great at keeping track of expiration dates. “No, my mom wasn’t like that. She was a pretty seasoned foster carer, she so was pretty on top of those kinds of things. I guess kids wouldn’t want to stay with us if she had a reputation for getting them sick.” 

Blue eyes lit up when Topher mentioned that they knew Laurel. “You know her? That’s awesome! She’s great. I’m so lucky to be getting lessons from her.” Coming to Astoria had been the right decision; there were so many people here that Ash could learn from, with so many more years experience than her. “Isn’t it?” Ashling twirled the stick in her fingers, a genuine smile on her lips. “Do you want it? I’m out here enough that I’ll probably find another one eventually.” 

Foster meant adoption, or something, Topher wasn’t certain, but they didn’t ask. “Probably. Was she a good cook? My mom made a lot of weird recipes, I could never be certain where they came from, she just cooked with a lot of spices. Nobody liked her cooking,” they said with a grin. At least, nobody but them and some of the neighbours who also made similar dishes. The actual Flemish people ate far more bland. 

They nodded enthusiastically. “Yes, she is great. I am certain she can teach you a lot, she’s a good teacher, she taught me how to dance.” They bit their lip at the thought, it felt strange to them to be talking about a friend with someone they didn’t know, but mostly because Topher didn’t have a lot of friends that were more than just... situational friends. Most ‘friends’ they had were people who also lived on the street. All the other friends were... friends, but Topher still felt awkward around most of them. Laurel, Sara, and Teddy were those that they felt comfortable enough around, but even then they worried those wouldn’t see them as such. And then the present came rushing back with such a nice nod to their past that Topher smiled as they had when they were younger at got a Caterpie pokemon card. “Oh, yes, I would like that,” they said.

5. On an average day, what can be found in your character’s pockets?

Receipts, keys, and a lot of coins.

6. Does your character have recurring themes in their dreams?

Topher rarely remembers their dreams. They can sleep without dreaming, which they find nice but also sad.

18. Is your character more likely to admire wisdom, or ambition in others?

Wisdom.

44. How easy or difficult is it for your character to say “I love you?” Can they say it without meaning it?