I do not have to explain myself

Sanguinius, who is still a child in this one, desperately tries to come through to Ishidur Ossuros and almost disowns him in a fit of emotions. This causes Ishidur to collapse in grief and pain, and Sanguinius instantly regrets his harsh words and tries to make comfort his hurting son. The scene is beautiful, and I am not doing it justice with my words (hopefully with my art, though)

Below is another version of this work, as I still cannot decide which one I like best. There is also a bloodied version, which probably makes more sence for the scene, as Sanguinius just finished killing those sons who were lost to the Red Thirst, and both of them are kneeling in a pool of blood. I'll maybe post it later

Can also be viewed as a standalone abstract of Sanguinius and the Revenant legion, second version more so than the first probably.

Мне так нравится рисовать примархов в цепочках и платьях. А Сангвинию это особенно идёт / I really enjoy drawing primarchs in chains and dresses. And it especially suits Sanguinius.

"Is fine Kyrin. I did not want to pressure her."

"..." you looked again at him, to the giant that spoked with a quiet voice and weared those curious trinkets like feathers and small skulls like jewelry. "... I'm fine....my lord...thank you..."

And while he smiled you wondered where you had saw him before...

///

The crow were always around. You like to call them like that, his sons.

They weren't bad, to be honest you had noticed that they were quite nice, especially to you, peobably because of your frail health. They were around , always around, monitoring everything and moving like shadow.

"It's our way." Told you Kyrin when one of his brothers appeared almost from the nothingless. " We move where eyes cannot see us. Take actions where we can avoid conflicts."

Kyrin was an old warrior, a veteran that didn't barked command but spoke with a soft voice. Yet, they assured yoi that no blade was swift like his own. He had been chosen by his father to watch over you for the voyage to Deliverance, their home planet, because he has been in a...similiar situation.

"I had a sister, once." He told you with a melancholic tone. "She was sick...I couldn't do much for her... slaves do not require medical attention."

"...were you a slave?"

"A long time ago, yes."

"And...what happened?"

"My Father, Corvus Corax happened."

He told you about him, about the name that Deliverance once had, about the prisoners, the long hours of work, the people that couldn't even eat or sleep properly. He told you that Corvus became the hero that they needed, that he freed them, that brought justice.

And you realized that Corvus was more kinde than you could imagine.

"...I would like to know more about him..."

"... I'm sure he would love that."

There was never the intention to lead you to his father, to allow the spark of curiosity to finally fire up the possibility of you getting closer to him. He had done nothing onm purpose, even if it was clearly the intention that him and his brothers had.

While mortals could not see the shadows dancing between the corners of the ship, they clearly understand the sudden ruckus, as they could see sometimes, between the few lights, the features of their father admiring this fragile creature.

The Ravens has been gifted with things that other Space Marines would had not find important or usefull, but they hold with pride their ability of observation . They had noted how the shadow seemed to bend around you, how they seemed to be always not too close, yet present where you stay. Always close, always reachable and they knew who chould have done this.

They noticed hiw their father seemed...interested in things he had view as moundain or trivial, how his eyes seemed to lingering on screens that were fastly closed to them, how he seemed lost in thoughts and dreams.

It was obvious what was happening and, in the love they hold for their father, they wished only to help him.

///

When the Shadow of the Emperor had reached its destination you had imagined festivities for the return of the warriors. So you were quite surprised when instead people kept on doing everything they were like nothing had happened. On the other hand, you were thrilling with excitement by the prospect of exploring a new planet, to became like one of the ambassador in the stories you you had back home. It was hilarious, a few weeks before you were crying non stop because of your departure and now you were fantasizing about this moon, its planet and what kind of place had gave birth to your silents protectors.

Untill your health worsened all of a sudden. They blamed the change of air, the structure of the planet, whatever the reason was you were now stuck in a room, connected to monitors and machines. You had little memories about the place they had took you, your mind too foggy by the fever to remember, and the only few things you knew were the constant darkness and the coming and going of the medicae.

You remember so little, but you knew you weren't alone and that you were cared for. You remember a soft and cold head that gaved you some solace on your temple, a soaked cloth to clean you from the sweat and a hand holding your, giving you some courage and company where you felt alone without your family. You thought it must have been Kyrin, who else could had such kindness to tend to you?

It was when your head had finally stopped screaming and your lungs burning that you finally had the strenght to understand that your room has changed. Bigger, spacer, a large window that face a sky full of stars and clouds. Hiding the only source of light that could grant something like a day another planet orbitated placidly.

It was when the star decided to show up, when the moon had stopped its circle that Kyrin appeared, welcoming you oficially to the moon of Kiavahr: Deliverance, operative base of the Raven Guards.

"Why are we so high?" You rasped, holding yourself close to your guardian while looking down.

"Our Fortress-Monastery is situated in a tower that once belonged to our jailers, my Lady. This is Raven Spire, our home...and yours, of course."

He then explained you everything you needed to know about your new home, its function, what holded and especially who lived there. Knowing that you were so close to Corax quarters, even if you felt like this man must had completely forgotten about you!

Yet, you couldn't imagine how planned this choice was.

You couldn't remember, not in those delirious time when your fever had peaked and some thought you would had soon succumbed from your illness, but Corvus

had never once leaved your side.

He had never cared for what they may had found ridiculous or improper for a Primarch, he had spent hours when he could close to you, begging his Apothecaries to do something, to at least gave you some respite from the fever. He could do so little and what he did seemed completely useless to the point he feared that he had done a mistake, that he had took you from your home and condemn you to die surrounded by strangers. He wanted to take you back, to ignore the voice in his head and fix what he had done.

Then, you started to get better. Your fever calmed down, your sleeps became peacefull, deep, and your breath wasn't like someone was holding a hand on your neck.

He smiled, while you were sleeping, and he decided that it wasn't such a bad idea.

///

You moved the small stone between your fingers, noticing a greeny reflection from were the light touched it. Inside, the metal fragments incapsulated recreate a small scale scenario of a starry night, an operation that must has needed thousand of years to happen.

It wasn't the first time something like this appeared, only that this time had happened almost without intent.

You had noticed this pattern when, during the twilight of the moon, you noticed a gleam in the dark shadows of the tower. You wondered of the origin of the event and Kyrin explained that it was the flora of Deliverance.

" Plants can grow in the night?" You asked with curiosity.

"Indeed they can my lady." He responded. "It is quite a natural phenomena."

"Do flowers do that to?"

"They shine as gems under a scoarching sun."

"...can we see them? "

Of course the answer was no. Too risky, your health still hanged on a thread and the chance of worsening were always close. Many medicae had already been consulted and more were supposed to be heard in a matter of days, yet any precaution was never enough. And you found yourself earning for a word just a few step from you.

That same night you only saw a silhouette between your slumbering eyes and the swaying of the drapes in the wind before you could notice the gentle glowing. You fully woke up when the sweet scent came to your nostrils and the petals slowly opened in a quiet glow.

A flower, a white small luminescent crown that glowed under the weak light that filtered behind Kiavahr.

You questioned Kyrin, that looked confused, then almost hurt.

"...I suppose that...who wanted to gift you this wanted you to see it in when you would truly appreciated it ."

"They entered my room!" You said holding back your tremors. "While I was asleep! Did...did you-"

"I would never do anything to cause you harm." He said with his firm and secure tone, more aggressive now. "No one will ever harm you. Not while under my Father eyes."

It was after that argument that, probably, someone must had understood the gravity of their actions, because that night they had leaved a sign but outside of your room. You just heard a soft knock, sound of footsteps and, laying outside were you could see it, another flower, this time far smaller than the ones that were now in your possession, and a note.

Forgive my, I never meant to scare you. Please accept my offerings untill you can finally exit the tower.

You questioned Kyrin once more, less aggressive this time. He smiled while reading, trying to look less dismissive he could.

"They probably care for you. Maybe they know that you cannot roam for too long around Deliverance and they want you to know what awaits for you outside."

" ...Isn't... abbormal? Leaving messages...and these?"

"Well, gifts and notes never harmed anyone on my notices. Maybe is someone that just wish to known you better?"

Maybe it was the fact that an old soldier was trying to making sense of the situation, maybe for the fact thta you were indeed in one of the most secured palace on these moon and in the most secured area of the same area. Maybe it was that you did not known better...

A message never hurt a fly...right?

You left a message back, after the last call of the night in the same place you had found the first one.

Thank you for the comprehension.

The next day another message, this time accompanied by what seemed to be a leave, colored in a deep dark purpleish tone that turned to a slight magenta when the light touched it. The most iconic trait was the velvety sensation that you felt once your finger touched it, something imiliar to another plant from Terra.

I just wish you can see this world. This is the only way I can do it.

There was a good intention and that was enough for you to keep writing messages and accepting these offerings, not knowing that it was like pouring gasoline on a fire.

The stone was something Corvus has known since his childhood. A mineral competely useless for his former masters yet with a inner beauty that was precious for his brothers and sisters. Even now that the chains were broken it meant so little value for others and he wnated for you to being enmored just like he was.

He felt wounded when Kyrin explained the scare in your eyes once you told him about his father incursion in your chambers, how you completely ignored the gift because you were terrorized by his action. He meant no wrong! He would had never even touched you! He just wnated to have close what you wished to have close! He had no malice in his heart, he sweared!

He apologized, still hiding in the shadows, a last message to finally create a wall. It wasn't right, he had told himself, of course any individual with some logical mind would had found his acts deranged.

He left one last gift, just one and an apology written with an heavy heart....and you responded to it.

He didn't wanted to take it as a sign, he did not wanted to see it like you were reciprocating, but an awfull hope started to bloom in his heart, the one that told him that you may start to enjoy this dance between notes. He dared to hope that maybe you would had strated to grow curious about him, that you would wnated to see him and, maybe, once realizing that he was behind those messages alla long, you would see him not like the Primarch that refused to meet you but like the man in love he was.

It was silly, he told himself, but he wanted to believe it.

///

I wish I could be healthier. Even back home it was hard for me, but my thought are mostly for my family. I love them all so gratly, my father, my brothers...all of them are important to me but I cannot fathom the idea that without me they would feel better. I leaved them and read how they are in constant worried for me, that even my father is not doing well because he cannot see me.

I wish I wasn't born sick, I wish that my mother didn't died with the sorrow of leaving me in a world without a good health. I wish people did not feel like they have to move like I could crumble at every breath.

I wish I could be fixed.

He re readed it this note of days ago, when you had another attack just while tacking a stroll on the balcony. He remembered the commotion, how the serfs screamed in panic because they forgot the medicines. He sighed and posed the paper down along the rest and took another one.

Today has been better. I woke up earlier when you can see the ending of the eclipse and the sun start to poke out and I heard the heavy boots moving. I wonder iof Lord Corax is alongside them, I've got no chance to meet him. Kyrin said he's sorry he cannot see me besides those few times and I'm worried he's start to regret taking me with him. It must be exhausting deal now with another burden. Once I'm better I would like to chat with him and thanks him for his kindness and apologize for the troubles.

He have a soft voice, it seems nice.

The night he wnated to burst into your room and telling you that you're not a burden, that he would love to spend every second he can have just by talking to you. He blushed thinking that in the end you had a good thought him. Another note, a recent one.

I like the doctors. Usually they are always nice and understanding. When I was small they weren't allow to stay alone with me so I nebver had bad experiences with them.

There's just this one, Koyak, that make me unseasy. He said he needs sample and he pocke my skin everytime. He doesn't even ask me how do I feel, but it's fine I'm always the same. I don't like his syringes, they're big and hurt me and he said he had to do it more than once because my veins are small. He said he want to do another sample but in my bones, I don't like the sounds.

But I guess he knows better right?

Koyak...he heard of him. Difficult, arrogant, very good in his jobs. Kyrin had reprimended him more than once about treating you with respect, but even his captain wasn't a medicae and he may be the key for your helaing.

He did not liked the idea of a syringe in your bone tho...

///

"...I...C-Can we...there's no other option?"

"The origin of your sickness may be located in a more tricky area. A bone marrow analysis will show something."

Koyak haven't even looked at you, he had preferred preparing everything he needed for the procedure. Kyrin did not liked him neither, but he ws no apothecary, he knew so little about the human physiology. But he knew when someone was panicking when they clinged on his hand like he could fiox everything and when their heart punded so hard iot could break.

It wans't good, your heart rate was too fast.

"Now, we'll need to sedate."

"You never said anything about sedation."

"She have a good recoird for the few information I got, I presume she'll be able to endure it without a flinch."

He tested the mask, you couldn't smell the gas but Kyrin did far too well and he was, for the first time in a long time, quite worried. You , on the other hand, were terrified, especially when he rised the drill and the only sound that came was that sharp sound that made your skin quiver.

"I said you did not mentioned it." Kyrin growled at the man, leaving your hand his calm demeanor with you. "You won't do anything unless had been discussed!"

"My Lord, I understand your concern. "No he wasn't. "But it's for the best! I'll assure she won't feel a thing!"

"You wnat to drill a hole in her bones."

"With care the aftermath-"

"We need results! My father demand you to do something!"

"There will be after!"

No man could ever look in the eyes an Astarte and speak to them with a tone of superiority, but this one did and move past him, ignoring his glares and his now rising murdering intent.

"We'll start to sedate-"

"NO, no please no I don't-"

"Do not start, you too, this is a simple operation."

"Please! Please I don't want to! I want somethign else! I want-"

"Stop acting like a child and cooperate! Honestly I'm surrounded by ignorant fools!"

You keep on moving his hands away, tryed to remove the mask, begging. Kyrin had step closer, starting to arguing with that cruel doctor in front of you, motioning to him the door, probably barking him that he was not needed. The man shouted back, saying that it was an option, that it was a medical procedure that has been done for a long time, that they were idiots to believes that it was just a silly sickness.

And you started to feel your chest heavier, each breath harder to get, sounds mixed in one cacophony and a loud ring. You wnated to ask for help but you couldn't speak, to ask them to stop and leave you alone, to just not do that.

But then, befor eyour eyes could close, everything became dark.

///

"..."

"...I'm...forgive me...Ftaher I....I couldn't contain myself."

"No...No no...you did what I asked you, Kyrin...you wnated to protect her."

"That Medicae wanted to... I couldn't allow him."

"I know...I know my child, I know...I felt the same way."

Corvu sighed in his chair, his hands played with that one note he wnated to gave you that night.

"...Did you find him'?"

Kyrin shifted in his foot, uncomfortable.

"Did you?"

"...Yes..."

"...Did I-"

"No he...he was untouched...But his mind has been lost...talk about a monster that took him into the darkness...thousand eyes looking at him..."

Corvus had already known about these thing, he knew because he had made it. How? He wasn't sure, but he did. He had created a nightmare, one that could break another mind, one that could make a man crumble and quiver like a child, one made to make suffer.

And he had no regrets about it.

He wnated to be surprised, but he wasn't. He enjoyed that, a small side of him enjoyed that he had made that cruel man suffer the pain that maybe he had cause to others while his practice. But he cared so little for the others, what had moved him was nothing else but you.

Small and scared little you, that beg that man to stop, that you're scared, that you don't wnat to. He felt also guilty, he should had make sure that "the best" does not rise their head over their own limit.

He had also was forced to see you in pain again while another attack took place in front of one that should had helped you. That horryfing sound of your lungs that cannot pull out or drag in anything in, your hands holding your neck like trying to open it to allow the oxygen to move, youre eyes slowly watering for the tears...

He knew far too well, he had saw it.

"....Good..." He said with a coldness that wasn't his own. “The next time he touch what’s mine, I’ll cut his fucking arm off. I'll teach him what happens when they think they can ruin my light. I'll make sure he doesn't even remember his name! I'll-"

"F-Father?"

Corvus looked at his son, at one of the many that had freed this planet with their own hands and blood...and he looked scared.

"...Y-Yours?...You...You talk like..."

Corvus's trembling hand met his own face, realizing his words, what they sounded, how shallow they were.