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@togepinochet

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My favorite one yet- heres the creator
Please for the love of god unmute
For a variety of reasons, i am trying to eat healthier and make more food at home, but i hate cooking. Unfortunately, we go through bread very fast in this house, and i'm not one of those people who can eat the same meal every single day with minimal variation, so i need options.
Please send me your easiest, simplest, 4-6 ingredients max, recipes. Health benefits appreciated but not required, only restrictions are no fish, no "solo" eggs*, and not spicy.
*Basically, no scrambled eggs, omelets, fried, over-easy, etc. Just imagine the eggs are flour -- you wouldn't want to eat a flour omelet, but bread or chicken made with flour is fine.
All responses appreciated. <3 I am extremely fortunate to have the food options i have in general, and any further suggestions to narrow down the abundance of choices in front of me is above and beyond what most people have had throughout history, so i really appreciate it.
One Pot Garlic Parmesan Pasta - The easiest and creamiest pasta made in a single pot - even the pasta gets cooked right in the pan! How easy
^ Yes this is over 6 ingredients but it's so ridiculously easy. I combine with chicken breast (can do salt, pepper, italian seasoning) for some extra protein, and you can add spinach for some greens
This Baked Chicken Breast comes out juicy and flavorful every time! With a simple spice rub and quick cook time, it's perfect for any night.
^ Super easy and I often combine this with pasta or rice (bonus points if I made it in a rice cooker!) for a weeknight dinner. I WILL say that you should at least double the amount of spices.
These 6 easy chicken marinade recipes add bold sweet, tangy, and savory flavor to your chicken, plus tips for marinating and freezing for qu
^ Make any of these, leave in the fridge overnight, dump in a crockpot
Cacio e Pepe....yum yum yum and yum! I first noticed this classic Roman pasta dish a couple of years ago before a trip to Rome. Having been
^ I make cacio e pepe all the time. I don't even use a recipe anymore, and I couldn't tell you the measurements. Maybe try this one? Super easy as long as you're down to grate some cheese.
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Anyway, yeah, I love cooking but am also autistic and burn out easily...I am fully functional maybe 10% of the time. I especially like recipes with minimal chopping or mess afterwards. A few more from my personal recipe book:
BETTER THAN HAMBURGER HELPER:
Grab 2 lbs ground beef, season to your liking (I use one of my spice mixes...anything designed for beef is great. Cajun seasoning is fun) and cook in a skillet with tall sides or a pot
While that's going on, make two boxes of mac and cheese, follow box directions
Combine the two
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MY BOYFRIEND'S BBQ CHICKEN:
1 1/2 cups bbq sauce (you pick the type)
3 tbsp apple cider vinegar
3 chicken breasts
1 tbsp black pepper
1 tbsp cayenne pepper (since you dislike spicy food, either lessen or omit entirely)
Combine everything in a large bowl. Pop the chicken in the crock pot, pour bbq sauce mix over, turn chicken to fully cover. Cook on low for 4 hours. I usually then shred it once it cools a bit.
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PEANUT BUTTER NOODLES: (my favorite "I am so so so tired but I need nutrition" meal)
Ramen noodles (steal from a pack, or buy them in the international section of the grocery store)
2 tbsp peanut butter
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp rice vinegar
1 tbsp sesame oil
1-2 tbsp gochujang, chili oil, or sriracha **if you don't like spicy food, either lessen or omit entirely
Cook noodles. While they boil, combine the rest of the ingredients in a bowl. Drain noodles, rinse with cold water, add to bowl. I like topping with sesame seeds and green onions if they're on hand.
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REALLY LAZY TIPS:
Rotisserie chicken. Buy it, shred it, douse it with sauce you made or bought, pop it into a bowl of packet ramen...etc.
Pre-made meatballs, jar sauce, spaghetti=lazy Italian dinner
SHEET PAN RECIPES. Seriously, look them up on Pinterest. I make a lot of chicken and potato and greens recipes.
If you hate chopping potatoes, buy the mini ones and just chop in quarters. Idk, it's easier for me.
Spaghetti bake
16 oz pasta
14oz jar of spaghetti sauce
1 jar ⬆️ of water
S&p to taste
*bonus* you can add a pound of browned ground meat if you feel like you need a heartier meal or more protein
Combine in a 9x13 pan and cover with foil. Bake for 35 min. Uncover, stir, and add mozzarella if you want, bake for 15 more minutes or until pasta is soft and cheese is melty
Chag Pesach Sameach!
Chag Pesach Sameach!

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Also his deeply underrated ability to clap back
Reminds me of that story about the teacher or lecturer or whatever who told their class "hey, the ceiling has 'gullible' written on it" and anyone who looked up discovered that yep, the word "gullible" really had been written on a piece of card and taped to the ceiling. And after letting that sink in for a while the teacher said something like "those of you who looked up have just demonstrated one of the most important tenets of research: check the source."
>Government tells people to die for them
>People gets killed by the same government
Don’t die for the state, kids.
Every time my extended family gets together in upstate ny, we (the Adults) all get wasted & at least 1 giant Family Scandal comes out…..tonight is that night..
We’ve Got A Winner Folks, And It Involves Arson AND A Nun!
So apparently my aunt cecelia (not really my aunt, just the best friend of my dads cousin, whomst we also call aunt) once married a dude referred to only as Florida Asshole. He was named such because he apparently left my aunt cecelia while she was in the hospital, stole all of their stuff, and fucked off to florida. Aunt cecelia then hired a p.i. to find him, as u do, and went down to florida with my dads cousin (who was going to florida for a work trip, and had no idea Florida Asshole was there). Apparently the p.i. told aunt cecelia which city the guy was in, but hadnt found the exact address yet, so ofc aunt cecelia did what any other able bodied half insane scorned person might. She went to a costume shop, bought a full nun costume, and went door to door under the assumption that she was collecting charity. (She did, in fact, donate everything she collected. This was an important fact to her). At one of the houses, she looked in the window and noticed an awful lot of furniture that used to be hers. So she, obviously, went to a gas station and bought several cans of gasoline, threw a molotov cocktail through the front window, and began pouring gasoline over the rest of the house. At this point, Florida Asshole came outside, recognized his ex wife looking like a renegade nun sent to punish him for his sins, and began beating her. The neighbors, seeing the strange new man beating a nun in his front yard while his house was on fire, did the only sensible thing in this story and called the police. Who promptly arrested Florida Asshole for assaulting a nun. Aunt cecelia did not get arrested, came clean to her best friend, and was immediately sent back to new york with a ticket bought under my other aunt’s name. We don’t know if she still has an arrest warrant out for her in florida, and that’s tonight’s Family Scandal!

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Day 29 - Psychosomatic Bullshit
Found the post!
fun fact: tigers also contract their muscles to make a slow tiger into a fast tiger
i genuinely forget this is supposed to be aged up chris whatever and not joe biden
i have suffered less than christ but have complained way more abt it

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What happens when you have heated tile flooring
(via)
Just another thing the boomers fumbled