May 13
#hi. my fellow void people. back again for another shout into the aforementioned void#i want to feel wanted. i want to recieve what i give. i give so much attention and just dont recieve it back#i put in so much effort for this. why does it have to be one sided?#you act as if it isnt. like its a joint effort. its really not. how many times do i have to put myself out there and ask for what i want.#promised things will change? and they dont. i feel that same disinterest from before#just because i show interest and am attentive doesnt mean im feeling the same back#and why would it?#its not as if actually being given the same treatment back#how can i feel something i dont get?#it doesnt make sense. i wish people were easy to read and i didnt have to guess if people like me or not#any time i express how i feel it always ends poorly. its taken aggressive or confrontational#Thats not always the case. i may be emotional unstable but it doesnt mean im any less human and capable of being sane and expressing what I#feel or want. why do i have to be made to feel bad for my own emotions and thoughts?#im confused. i want answers. i want to know everything and i want you to know how you make me feel.#people want me to move on as soon as they say sorry. as if it makes every emotion disappear instantly. it doesnt.#what am i expected to do? im told off if i air out troubles with one person to another so i cant go to anyone else.#but it also seems like i cant even go to them either because anytime i express myself and my hurt its taken as aggression and hostility.#is that what people think of me?#a hostile. emotionally unstable. volatile human?#what do you think of me#i do so much for people#why cant they do the same for me#am i not important enough?
