WONDERLAND

“i did not save you. did you hear what i told you at the bus stop? and i don’t know anything about an accident.“ an awful liar, just terrible. one could only wonder how miyoung got herself out of dozens of lessons feigning stomach aches or emergencies when her acting skills left much to be desired for.

time goes by slowly while eunju waits for miyoung’s answer.

she looks at miyoung, looks at the large clock on the wall, at the window, how outside few people are walking through the streets, unaware of the conversation those two girls are having. she looks down at her own hands, ignores how they are trembling of nervousness. she looks everywhere and back to miyoung when the older girl starts speaking.

“you’re lying.” eunju says right away, covers her mouth with her hands in shock because it wasn’t her intention to say it. sometimes things like this happen, sometimes it’s like eunju has no control over her brain to mouth filter. it’s embarrassing, but now she started and she can’t go back and she’s still facing miyoung.

truth be told, eunju doesn’t remember much of what miyoung told her that morning. she was sleepy, the sky was still grey and miyoung was so, so pretty that early that eunju couldn’t focus on anything else but at the other girl’s face. she remembers insults to her project and the occasional teasing, but anything else went over her head.

“you never talk to me, miyoung.” it’s not an accusation – eunju doesn’t have the right to make one, anyway, they were never friends. it’s a statement of their relationship, or lack of one. sometimes miyoung calls her nerd and laughs at her, but they have never talked. if anything this is the longest eunju has ever talked to her ever since that day at the bus stop.

“and honestly that morning you were a bit too agitated.” she says in a way to try and fish for something. a reaction, a slip, anything that confirms she is right. because the thing is: eunju knows she is. she doesn’t know how, but she feels something, a hunch, intuition or whatever. there is a thing inside her that tells her she is right.

He says nothing until there’s nothing else to hold onto. A single sigh is his undoing, through the small parting of his mouth, and then he caves. 

“Shit.” 

(What the fuck have I done?) 

it’s funny, yerin thinks, this connection between them.

she had known she wanted noah before she could even understand why or for what – she took one look at that boy and knew he had be hers in any capacity possible. it’s been years and yerin doesn’t regret it, approaching the boy at a formal party, smiling at him. she knew then, she knows now, noah is the one. her mother calls her dramatic, says yerin is too young to know such things, that there will be other boys, prettier than noah, smarter than noah, richer than noah ( and it’s always on this part where she gives yerin a pointed look ). and she’s not wrong, there will be better boys.

but would they kill for her like noah did?

yerin thinks about marin, about how she would laugh at noah. she had a mean laugh and a way of making people uncomfortable, the little bitch. now she’s at the morgue and noah is here, with yerin – at least his body is.

she locks the door, kicks her shoes to the side and walks to noah. yerin stands in front of him and looks at him, her boyfriend, her lover, her partner in crime, literally now. she doesn’t waste time, instead she straddles his lap, knees digging on the mattress, dress riding up. they have been in this same position many times before and it always makes her stomach flutter.

fuck, eikichi thinks. he really is tired, but he can’t rest until they’re home. until hanbin is a hundred percent safe on choi family territory. “next time, i don’t care what the deal is—we’re bringing more guards with us. i’m not going to risk shit like this again.” i’m not going to risk you again. “you’re going to end up with more scars than tattoos if this keeps up. that isn’t sexy, you know?”

you promised.

this is not how they are supposed to work. eikichi should be the one making promises, not hanbin. he is the boss, after all. still, he promises eikichi he will never leave and he intends on keeping it. eikichi will help him turn the choi family into the most respected family the city has ever seen, they will rule over the other four families and will teach them a lesson. together.

together.

walking to the car is torture, but hanbin doesn’t let it show. he makes an effort to open his shirt and throws it somewhere behind him. he is bleeding all over his brand new bentley and hanbin tries to focus on not dying instead on the fact that there is blood on his goddamn car. he watches eikichi move, always so focused and so experienced, knowing exactly what to do, how to take care of hanbin. he was trained for that, taught everything he needed to know to keep hanbin alive. would he still act the same if loyalty wasn’t nearly beaten into him since he was a teenager? would eikichi follow him because of who he is instead out of survival instinct?

hanbin feels feverish when he presses his hand against the bandage, watching as it turns red. doctor kim doesn’t take more than a couple of seconds before picking up the call – he knows that when choi hanbin calls he better pick up. “doctor i need you in my house at ten.” hanbin says once he makes sure the man is listening. he doesn’t need more than that, the doctor will know what means.

“who would have guessed a couple of low level jos would think they can take me? me?” hanbin asks, annoyed. “when we get home i need you to call jihoon and tell him to go there, we’ll have to prepare for the blowback.” eikichi will know where to find their lieutenant, the man responsible for one of the nightclubs the choi family uses to do money laundering. breathing is getting harder by the minute, but hanbin doesn’t want to scare eikichi, he knows he will be fine.

he chuckles, a sound that comes out raspy, almost breathless. “i’ll look sexy as fuck, don’t lie.” unlike eikichi, hanbin doesn’t have many tattoos. the choi family dragon takes most of his chest and his left arm, two black lines on his right arm, one for his father and one for his mother, a reminder that they are gone. hanbin will add one for his grandmother when she passes too. he will never add one for eikichi, because eikichi will never leave him, not like that.

“spit it out,“ she said before plopping the rice in her mouth and leaning back, wondering if she could even stomach her food.

the sound of the chair scrapping against the floor makes eunju jump in surprise. she looks at miyoung and sits down, unsure of how to begin. she didn’t have a plan when coming to talk to the other girl, more like a curiosity and the certainty that miyoung would dismiss her without a word. now here they are, miyoung looking so cool while doing such an ordinary thing as eating breakfast and eunju fidgeting, too embarrassed to say anything but not wanting to get up and leave without saying a thing.

she thought about it for far too long – but this is eunju, who is prone to daydreaming while bagging groceries, always finding a way to escape her reality, even if it’s just inside her mind – and miyoung had to know something about the accident. maybe it was a deliberate crime and miyoung was part of the criminals! maybe it was a ploy by the oil industry to... well... something! and miyoung, being an oil heiress herself would know!

eunju takes a deep breath and speaks it before she loses all the courage ( none ) that she gathered since sitting there. “well, first i would like to thank you for saving my life.” her voice is lower than usual, shy as eunju is to be speaking to miyoung. it’s so surreal, to be sitting with the most popular girl of their little town, to be taking a bit of miyoung’s time. “i don’t think i thanked you before.” in part because she was too shocked and needed time to process what happened and in part because the idea of talking to miyoung terrified her. it still does.

“i mean... you couldn’t have known what was about to happen,” eunju laughs in a way that can only be described as awkward and so uncool. “but still, if it wasn’t for you i’d be dead now!” and how horrible would that be, really. eunju can’t die before going to seoul and from there seeing the rest of the world! there’s so much she wants to accomplish and none of that would be possible if it wasn’t for the other girl.

“with that being said...” eunju looks around them, at how the restaurant is almost empty. no one in sokcho is ever in a hurry to go anywhere, so there is no need to deny themselves a nice homemade breakfast. but still, it’s nice here, in the silence, with miyoung. eunju leans forward on the table, large eyes staring at the older girl. she lowers her voice even more, afraid anyone will hear her question. hell, she’s afraid miyoung will hear her question because it sounds as dumb coming out of her mouth as it did when she first thought about it, but eunju won’t be able to live if she doesn’t know.

“could you lady excuse us? I need to talk to seola for a second. alone. it’s just a second, I swear,” he reinforces the smile, watches as they apologize and leave. jaeho turns her attention back to his girlfriend. “you look terrible. what is going on?”

in the scene everything else falls to the background. she stops being seola and becomes here character, forgets about everything. it’s what makes her feel alive, the thing she loves the most. when the director ends the scene she rushes to her chair, grabs the script because she is trying her hardest to not mess up. in this world it’s important to be professional at all times.

she looks at jaeho, raises an eyebrow in a silent question as he dismisses the makeup artists with that smile of his. “i thought you would have left by now.” she says instead of answering his question. seola looks at him, curious about his sudden interest. jaeho never cares about anything or anyone that isn’t him, that’s the first thing she learned about her boyfriend. he puts himself first, second and third and only then, perhaps, thinks of the rest of the world.

“i told you jaeho, they keep changing the script and i keep having to memorize new lines in a hurry. it’s a whole mess between the writer, the production and the girl’s company, each one trying to get the final word.” seola resists the urge to rub her hand over her eyes not to smudge her makeup. it looks minimal now because her character is supposed to be a poor teacher, but there are layers over layers of foundation, concealer and eye shadow to make her look this natural.

“we filmed until 2am last night, i went to bed by 3 and guess what? when i woke up at 6 there was a change on the script.” she is so annoyed right now. at her work, at the goddamn idol girl who shouldn’t even be there, at jaeho. always at jaeho. why is he still standing there looking at her like he cares? there is no one around, there is no need for him to pretend. “i don’t remember the last time i had a good night of sleep.” a lie, she does. it was two days before she had her first table reading for this project, when she had dinner at jaeho’s and fell asleep in his arms while he talked about the concept about his next comeback.

she looks at jaeho, admires him openly. it would be easy to be rude, to tell him to leave now that his little scene is over, but seola is a fool and she is selfish, she wants him there. even if he hates her and their fake relationship, even if he is pretending to care, seola wants him there. she is so tired she doesn’t have it in her to fight now, so she doesn’t.

“listen to me.” with his free hand, eikichi cups hanbin’s face and brings it close to his, leaving smears of blood on hanbin’s cheeks. “if you can’t walk, tell me. i’ll carry you. just don’t push yourself, okay? i—” and here, his voice fades, his throat constricting around words he can’t bring himself to say. “i don’t want to lose you over something stupid like this,” he forces out eventually. “not like this.” they’re supposed to have years together to build the choi empire.

he won’t let it end prematurely.

hanbin has been hurt before, countless times. from the moment he started his journey as the choi heir at 15 hanbin’s body has become a patchwork of scars and bruises, never fully healed until he adds a new one to the collection. and through each and every one of those eikichi has been by his side, running to save him, to take a bullet for him, be stabbed for him. eikichi would die for him, hanbin has no doubt of it.

( “think of him as a very skilled dog,” his father said, voice serious as they watched the new japanese recruit fight one of their men. “your dog.”

it was always like this: you want to join the choi family? you will be thrown inside a cage with another man and fight for your spot. the strong receive a dragon tattoo and master choi’s protection. the weak die.

“mine?” hanbin asked, confused. normal teenagers receive small gifts from their parents, rich teenagers receive cars and plastic surgeries, choi hanbin was gifted a shadow.

“yours.” his father gestured as the scrawny kid came victorious. “he will be your protector, hanbin. we will raise and train this boy to follow you like a dog and bite anyone who tries to hurt you.” )

but the thing is, hanbin would also die for him. it wasn’t part of deal and eikichi would try to stop him, but hanbin would give up his own life for this man. now, as they look at each other in this shitty alleyway, hanbin knows he would be ready to do anything for eikichi. his eikichi, who keeps him up, who holds his face so delicately, whose voice cracks when he says how he doesn’t want to lose hanbin.

for a split second hanbin considers kissing eikichi. bleeding or not, fuck it, he wants to, just once, just to know how it would feel. instead he leans into eikichi’s arms and nods. “i’m not going to die eikichi, don’t worry.” instead he rests his forehead against eikichi’s and closes his eyes. “i won’t leave you, i promise.” hanbin opens his eyes, decided to live. he would die for eikichi and he sure will live for him.

“it really went through, i can feel the blood on my back.” he says, taking a deep breath and focusing. now it’s not the time to let his feelings speak, there will be no future for them if hanbin bleeds to death here. “let’s get to the car, i can walk if i lean on you.” hanbin has been shot before, he has learned enough to know how to evaluate how serious a wound is. this is not good, but not terrible. he can solve it. with eikichi he can solve everything.

he places a hand on her elbow, brings her closer to the cart. once she is close he leans in, as though showing her the menu. and then whispers. “you can thank my company for this shit show.”

“oh, right.” seola says, feeling a bit dumb because for a second she thought that even jaeho doesn’t love he could at least be nice. but he can’t because he’s kang jaeho and he doesn’t need to be nice, not to her or anyone else. she takes a cup of coffee, hand firm as she holds it. “thanks baby, i really needed this.” she says loud enough for the people around them to hear, smiles as if she isn’t both parts annoyed and hurt and kisses jaeho on the cheek.

she always liked this, that jaeho is tall, but not tall enough that even seola has to get on her tiptoes to kiss him. at least in this they are on the same level, kind of. she holds the cup with care and blows over the lid before taking a sip. a latte, her favorite. seola wonders which poor intern had to comb through her interviews until they found which type of coffee she likes. she imagines if jaeho’s company forced a document about her to him, imagines him taking a glimpse at the page and dismissing it, saying he already knew what matters about her in that obnoxious and crass way of his.

“you can say hi in between takes, we’re very busy today.” she smiles and when she’s about to go seola remembers something. she doesn’t have her phone with her, so with one hand she unceremoniously unbuttons his coat and pats her hand on his inner pockets until she finds his phone, fishing it with a familiarity she shouldn’t have. “take a picture of me in front of the truck, i want to post it on instagram.”

seola poses cutely in front of the cart, her coffee in one hand and the other making a heart. if she can take anything out of this relationship it will be the satisfaction of seeing how much jaeho’s fans hate her. she finds a sick joy in reading all the comments that call her a bitch and how jaeho deserves so much better. if only they knew.

once seola is satisfied with the pictures she walks over to jaeho, smiling. “don’t forget to send me those.” she says, before taking his hand and almost dragging him in with her, enough of this shit. once inside she drops his hand and points at the director. “go say hi and offer everyone coffee or whatever, i have five pages of script to memorize because that bitch’s” she points at the idol girl who is happily chatting with another actor “company doesn’t think she’s being showcased enough. now if you excuse me, baby, some of us have to work.”

“you,” eikichi says tiredly, “have a knack for pissing the wrong people off.” his lifts his gaze to look at hanbin’s face for the first time in a while. a part of him is afraid to find it pale or twisted in pain—this part is the hardest, to see hanbin suffer and be powerless to fix it. or worse, to be the cause of it. everyone is determined to take advantage of hanbin’s youth; eikichi, meanwhile, is determined to not let them. each instance that ends like this, with both of them bloody on the floor, is his failure. “were you born with this skill or did you have to work on it?” 

he should have seen it coming. after all, choi hanbin was raised for this. fancy meetings at hotel conference rooms sitting around expensive wooden tables drinking martinis are always a good thing, but hanbin grew up knowing most of his days would be spent at places such at this: an abandoned warehouse, shady alleyways, old motel rooms. that’s where most people like to meet him.

he should have seen it coming and yet he didn’t. hanbin can almost hear his father’s disappointed voice i expected more of you, habin. well father, so did i, his feverish mind replies. he didn’t see this coming because hanbin has been sloppy for a while, not focusing where it matters: his work – and that is a dangerous mistake because hanbin’s work is his life. the two are so connected there is no turning back.

they all understimate him, the other families. they see his youth as weakness and try to take his territory away. hanbin’s father warned him they would try to do so, it doesn’t come as a surprise. they are all snakes, one ready to bite the other the moment an opportunity comes, and for the jo family it seems to have come sooner. what better than a meeting with choi hanbin himself than to try and erase his existence?

they should have accounted for something else: hanbin is never alone. never. he falls down and thinks of eikichi, if they will try to shoot him as well. and if they do, well, they better run. hanbin has little reguard for his own life, but eikichi’s... that’s a different conversation. eikichi is his most precious possession.

but he isn’t really hanbin’s, is he?

he, like all the others, is a choi employee. he lives under the family’s protection and works for them, his role more important than others, but still, he is the family’s, not hanbin’s.

it’s with this thought in mind that hanbin watches eikichi shoot the two jo goons. there will be consequences, but hanbin pushes them aside the moment eikichi crouches over him. “i’m fine, i’m fine.” he replies, ears burning in embarrassment. hanbin is supposed to be the boss and yet here he is, shot and useless. “he couldn’t even hit a headshot, what a disgrace.”

威神V_董思成_WINWIN: Photographed from a 45 degree diagonal angle 🎬 ​​​(1, 2, 3, 4)

“pink dahlias can be hard to find, but perhaps, i could go up hill, the highest hill at the south of the kingdom, it is said they can be found in high places.” because it is more than obvious hyukjae would climb ANY mountain to find a suitable flower for the prince.

“hyukjae.” aroon repeats, enjoying how the name sounds on his tongue. he looks at the garden boy and is unable to smile. everything about hyukjae is breathtaking. “a beautiful name for a beautiful boy.” he says, still smiling. now that he knows hyukjae is the one behind the flowers he feels happy and back in his element. a monarch has to be charming, to leave all enchanted and this is what aroon wants to do with him. he wants hyukjae to never stop bringing him flowers.

“i’ll talk to her, don’t worry about it.” he can’t stop smiling at hyukjae, at how he seems ready to do anything for aroon and yet he is worried about respecting the rules. “my mother won’t oppose if she knows the roses are being taken to my room, i’m sure she’ll be happy that i like them.” the flowers belong to his mother and although hyukjae was indeed stealing from her, upon hearing his motive she wouldn’t punish him. maybe the servants see them as cruel, but aroon knows his parents to be benevolent.

as hyukjae starts going on and on aroon’s eyes widen, surprised at the lengths the boy is willing to go for him – or maybe he is not, maybe that is a lie to make sure aroon doesn’t punish him. he can’t help but touch hyukjae’s hand again, smiling softly. “please, that won’t be necessary, the roses are enough for me. even more so now that i know you’re the one who brings them.” he brushes his fingers over hyukjae’s, feeling his skin. the garden boy must resent him for having such delicate hands, hands of a person who never had to work hard for anything in his life and never would. aroon’s body has scars and dark spots, but none of them can be attributed to work or to battles. he is nothing but a boy being trained to fight despite the fact that he has a whole army that would die for him. “and i don’t want you to get hurt because of me, hyukjae.”

aroon has never wanted to kiss anyone before. he has, however, done it before. he kissed one of the young ladies and one of the noble boys, both times late night after a feast, but it never meant anything. he did it because he was curious about the feeling and because he wanted to have a story, any story, about love conquests to tell to the other boys. and yet, at this moment, as he looks at the garden boy, aroon wants to kiss him, wants to know if hyukjae’s lips feel as soft as he look.