shadoll:
POPULAR. ✧
lorenz’s problem - of which there are too many to be helped or even counted - is that her every word comes as such an affront to his view of the world and self that she cannot judge whether a particularly sensitive nerve has been trampled or all he is made of are nerves. gloucester’s heir has to be the must baffling creature she has conferred with in the last decade and sara sees her own frustrations mirrored back at her as if she is the one being so thoroughly unreasonable. disbelief written across his face might be the only transparent part of him, the sheer drapery that cannot completely conceal a silhouette of fear.
she anticipates the momentary end of his whingeing, for the facade he calls composure to return. sara had a birthright long ago and all the trappings that accompanied it. some days she feels the weight at her heel of its shackles still. few, if any, are born equal to the task. fortunately, there is no one left in the world who expects anything from her now.
“the kia and i were reunited only a little while back,” she shares agreeably without cue, wistfulness imbued in her smile. “how ironic that i’ve a better relationship with my staff than you yours in such short time.”
her index finger carefully slides down the journal, held in place as she closes the cover on it and meets the face of his taunt in utmost sincerity.
“where do you think magic comes from? the answer is, again, life.”
one look at lorenz’s face incites a fit of giggles, softer this time, girlish. she unceremoniously leans into his space, dragging the kia staff before him at an awkward angle. lorenz is stubbornly a lost cause by choice of his own, but the bickering takes her back to a garden from her childhood. neither she nor lorenz have walked away yet, and sara knows it is because war has taught her the thrill of a fight. she concentrates on holding him by gaze alone, while he remains. once he leaves, disagreeing with the him in her head won’t be anywhere near as fun.
“when you call on your magic,” she teaches, “you channel it through objects - tomes, sigils, staves like the kia and thyrsus. do you think it merely vanishes afterwards? the lifeforce of every soul who has used kia before me runs through it and i’ll join them when i perish too. i hope they can be friends, after we are both gone. maybe that would cure it of heartache… do these writings of yours have any notes about how it was made? and don’t tell me they it just fell from the heavens. kia’s body was carved of an ancient tree and the gemstone atop here was retrieved from the depths of a sparkling lake.”
IMPETUOUS GIGGLES MAKE ONE THING CLEAR—they ring in Lorenz’s ears after the fact, drowns out the blood that wants to rise instead as she strikes every nerve true before grounding the childish barbs in something to grasp and remind him that he is arguing with a child. Glimpses of a wisdom beyond her years do not preclude that from being true.
The smartest thing to do is to walk away now. Spare his head the cold and the agony of swimming through her whims. She is not owed the wisdom of his family or of Thyrsus, and even if her claims are true—there is something just as unsettling about a child speaking with a plainness about her soul joining its ancestors, unseen but felt in the blood of all mages—his pride is on the line.
(That is what the entire thing is about, whether or not he wants to speak it. He is worthy, of that there is no doubt, but worthiness should not diminish enthusiasm to use it. It isn’t inextricably tied to the relic, for he still has a myriad of his own accomplishments to his name. Lorenz has spared all time he can afford for seething and wallowing in worthiness. It’s the time for seizing. If Sara knows something then it should benefit the both of them to listen. But his pride has already been trampled so thoroughly by forces outside of mortal comprehension, and letting, again, a child, do so with reckless abandon—)
He could go mad debating with himself, and madder letting Sara’s whimsies roam free. What is concrete is something so offhand he admittedly hadn’t even considered it for himself.
Lorenz is poised to respond. And then he shuts his mouth, lips pursed and brow furrowed with a frustration that is, for once this afternoon, not brought right back to his classmate.
“I,” Lorenz responds, after a rather pregnant pause, “I cannot recall its make ever being mentioned.”
—No, that cannot be right. That an oversight so large would exist right under his nose…!
He shifts uncomfortably on the grass next to Sara. A hand reaches out and grabs an unoccupied journal, leafing through it. The next words are a rare struggle to say with absolute certainty, though Lorenz tries: “I know enough to know it is not wood, unless it is wood petrified in a manner I am wholly unaware of. I am learned enough to know that makes a difference, but I…”
Pages fly by in handwriting of his forefathers. The shock becomes more pronounced, despite Lorenz’s voice clearly fighting to stay even. “I don’t recall my father ever mentioning its make to that effect. Magic was never his strong suit, and he did not wield Thyrsus but for official portraits.” The Kia Staff’s... unique origins aside (noted, tucked away as knowledge he’s not sure he’ll do anything but lightly contest for its exaggeration later) at least there is no question.
Then why should one exist for Thyrsus?
Pages rustle. Brow furrows more. There is a creeping suspicion as to what Sara’s next claim might be. The resignation that starts to creep into Lorenz’s voice is bolstered by his genuine confusion: “Do not tell me Thyrsus has whispered to you such an answer.” (Such a secret with no reason to be.)


















