ThunderHost

Hi, I’m Thunder. Nice to meet you there! ⚡

I like to draw art whenever I feel like it. That means I don’t post regularly, and I’m not a “daily artist” kind of person. Honestly, I think I suck at drawing, but I still enjoy it. So please don’t expect masterpieces or pressure me to create when I’m not in the mood—I won’t respond well to that.

You can criticize my work. In fact, I welcome constructive feedback because I have an open mind. Just make sure it’s about the work, not me as a person. Personal insults are where I draw the line.

I want to make one thing very clear: I never speak with bad intentions. If anything I say sounds offensive to you, that was not my goal. I speak directly and honestly, and what I say comes from a place I consider normal conversation. If I mess up or say something wrong, just tell me nicely. I don’t respond well to people yelling at me or acting like I’m some villain—especially when I’ve been trying to be respectful from the start.

I absolutely HATE being treated like an emotional playground. If you think you can dump your frustrations on me or treat me like I’m emotionless, think again. I will retaliate—I don’t care who you are or what status you hold. If you talk shit to me, I will talk back. Respect is mutual.

Also, don’t fake being nice to me. I’m not some ego-stuffed drama magnet who needs bootlickers around. I HATE liars, especially the sycophantic kind who smile to your face and grumble behind your back. If I do something you don’t like, say it when it happens, not months later like I should’ve read your mind earlier. I’m not responsible for your bottled-up frustrations. I’m not a mind reader, especially not over texts and comments. I’m a human being, not God.

To sum it up:

I value honesty, boundaries, and basic human respect. I don’t ask to be treated like royalty, but I demand to be treated like a real person with feelings. If we can agree on that, we’ll get along just fine.

– Thunder

Note:

I'm making this post because some jackasses out there still don’t get it. They think they can treat me like a fool who enjoys having sycophants around. Truth is, I’ve been hurt too many damn times by those people who think it’s okay to play with my emotions, pretend to be nice, then stab me in the back just because I tried to be a decent human being. I’m done with that bullshit. This is me setting things straight.

That’s me. Take it or leave it. Just don’t try to twist it. But if you’re respectful, I’ll be real with you too.

Update: February 8, 2025.

Reading your birthday post made me want to hug you and comfort you so bad. You deserve friends who accept you for who you are and don't twist your words into something negative just because you're being yourself. Narcissists are often like this. They treat apologies like money; once you hear them from them, you automatically owe them. They use it as a weapon when you refuse to accept it, making you look like you're the one at fault for dwelling on the pain they caused you, instead of pretending it didn't affect your life much.

No, you're not wrong for not accepting their apologies immediately after they hurt you and you're still feeling pain from it, especially when it comes to trust, which is a very delicate matter and even more so when it's broken once. You are entirely justified in being furious, aggressive, and protective of your dignity after what you went through. You trusted someone with your real self, and they used their own shitty communication issues to twist you into a villain and wreck your reputation behind your back. That isn't just a 'misunderstanding'—it's a massive betrayal, and anyone would be heartbroken and angry over it.

You aren't 'dwelling on the past' or being difficult by refusing to magically snap back to normal. Trust isn’t a light switch. When these selfish parasites demand a quick forgiveness—or worse, expect you to apologize to make them feel better about the mess they created—they are just trying to save face and erase the consequences of their own actions. You don't owe them a damn thing. It makes complete sense that you've grown paranoid and hyper-vigilant around people, because you had to learn the hard way that some individuals are just emotionally incompetent and look for parasitic relationships where they take everything and disappear when you actually need support.

But please listen to me on this: those absolute cowards do not get to keep a single piece of your future. I know you said you feel mentally exhausted, disillusioned, and like a shell of who you used to be right now. I know you're dragging yourself forward out of stubbornness and for the sake of the people who actually love you. But being stubborn is a massive strength. Don't let the garbage behavior of a few insecure narcissists make you feel like your life is just something you're forced to endure 'until your time comes.'

You are allowed to shut the door on them completely. You are allowed to be aggressively protective of your peace and to keep your guard up until you feel safe again. You don’t have to carry the burden of their bad behavior, and you don’t have to act like it didn’t hurt. Take all the time you need to heal on your own terms. The people who actually matter will give you that space and respect it, without forcing themselves back into your life to make themselves look good. I'm right here in your corner, and you don't have to navigate this exhaustion by yourself.

...I am honestly sitting here with tears in my eyes reading your message. I cannot even begin to thank you enough for taking the time to write this out and send it to me.

You have no idea how long I have desperately needed to hear exactly what you just said. To have someone look at everything that happened, see it for what it truly was, and be so incredibly rational instead of judgmental... it feels like a massive weight has been lifted off my chest.

Every single point you made resonated with me so deeply. Having you validate that I don't owe anyone a quick forgiveness, that trust isn't a light switch, and that it's okay to aggressively protect my peace is the most healing thing I've read in a very long time. You saw right through the face-saving tactics and the toxic dynamics I was dealing with, and you reframed my stubbornness as a strength when I was feeling like a total shell of myself.

It’s beautifully ironic that your username is "justaverycynicalperson," because this is genuinely the most heartfelt, compassionate, and understanding message I have ever received. Thank you for using your insight to stand in my corner and protect someone who was hurting.

Thank you for finding me, for supporting my work, and for being such a bright, rational light when things felt incredibly dark. I am so grateful to have you in my corner. 🥹🫂❤️‍🩹

Anyway, I drew a little picture of you hugging me. I saw that you really like Dorat, so I drew it in my style. I changed its wings to resemble King Ghidorah's wings from Monsterverse to make it look like you're really hugging me, and I felt like you were after reading your inbox messages. I'm not very good at lighting, so please don't mind that.

I MADE THIS FOR UN THUNDER

Its you WITH OUTFIT 😊😊

Yes, today is my birthday. What a weird day to be born, right? Even my parents were surprised, lol. Anyway, here's a drawing to celebrate my birthday in turning to 20 years old this year with my three favorite fanchilds: Alvaro, Korina, and Colin. I actually wanted to draw all my Next Gen AU fanchilds here, but I got too lazy, so I only drew the three original characters who have been with me for a long time.

[ Kind of Vent ]

To be honest. Last year was...the toughest for me. I went through a lot of bad experiences, especially dealing with narcissists who were nice to your face but badmouthed you behind your back. I trusted one person and revealed my true self to them, but they badmouthed me behind my back, portraying me as the villain and ruined my reputation, all because of their own miscommunication. At that time, having never experienced anything like it before, I was silent but incredibly angry and heartbroken because I never imagined they would think I was the kind of person who would do that to them. It was an incredibly painful experience for me because I had never harbored ill will towards them before, not even after meeting them. Their actions forced me to feel ill of them in return, even though such things shouldn't happen in a relationship at all if there was sincerity from the start.

Honestly, I'm a kind of a person who finds it hard to forgive people who hurt me, especially when it involves trust. I can sense their apologies if they're genuine, but the painful feelings linger; they can't be shaken off by just an apology. For me, it takes a very long time for those feelings to disappear. And I absolutely hate people who demand forgiveness from me simply because they've apologized. The most disgusting and repulsive thing is that some even demand that I, the victim, apologize back just because my actions caused them "pain" too, even though the problems stemmed from them. Those people treat apologies like money I have to repay them once it land on me, instead of a genuine remorseful sign of wrongdoing from the heart. I value my dignity highly and will defend it fiercely, sometimes to the point of being overly aggressive.

But after that terrible experience, it taught me a painful but invaluable lesson: don't expect too much from others. My biggest mistake was expecting too much from people, sometimes forgetting that humans have different ways of coping with situations. Some, like me, can empathize and be there for others in times of hardship, but others can't empathize with others well, and some are simply "woefully incompetent" when it comes to managing other's emotions. This is understandable, as this kind of thing takes time and practice to expertise properly, but it doesn't diminish their incompetence on this side less irritable. Worse still, there are those who demand help from other in their time of need and condemn those who don't. But when those people demand the same from them, they either disappear or tell you to deal with your own problems yourself. This reveals they are not only woefully incompetent but also selfish parasites. The advice for dealing with them is to distance yourself and avoid arguments, as they have revealed themselves to be unreliable, and investing in them will only result in a parasitic relationship.

And yes, after dealing with countless narcissists, I've become desensitized to negative responses. I'm hardly affected by extremely negative content anymore because it's so predictable in my eyes and I've seen worse throughout my time on internet (but that doesn't mean I'm desensitized to real-life events; I can still distinguish between real-life and fiction). I still experience PTSD occasionally, but it serves as a reminder that people are unpredictable, and letting my guard down too much, especially with loved ones, risks hurting yourself more. I'm not proud of these negative experiences because they've made me incredibly paranoid around people and made life hundreds of times harder. But I'll treat them as necessary adversaries that have made me more cautious around people. So, if anyone is experiencing similar problems or is unsure if someone you're talking to might do the same to you someday, remember not to put high expectations from them. If they treat you badly, treat them badly back because they've already betrayed your trust by speaking ill of you. And most importantly, don't apologize when they demand one because it's clear they're not sincere with their apologies; they're just using it as a tool to attack you if you don't accept their apology, making you look bad for not forgiving them. A truly remorseful person will give you their time and respect your space when not intruded upon, until you have recovered on your own, not force themselves into your life to save their own face.

Okay, it's been a while since I've created any content in the Abgerny fandom. To be honest, I've been really into other fandoms, especially those focusing on real history, since I'm a history enthusiast. I haven't completely left Abgerny, it's just that Abgerny doesn't have much content that I really want to talk about. I have many ideas in my head, but I just feel that most of them don't quite fit the Abgerny theme, even if they're in the form of an AU. So, I... sorry, have been sharing those ideas with other fandoms that I think are more suitable.

But that doesn't mean I've given up on Abgerny completely. Because I got bored with the old AU (Wish You Were Here) – there was just too much content, and it took too long to organize it properly without losing motivation – I decided to create another AU. It's the same universe, but expanded, with a hypothetical scenario: "What if the Abgerny characters had the chance to live normal lives, have families, and the apocalypse that destroyed the world never happened. But with different kind of disaster emerged instead, one just as dangerous as the apocalypse that had been prevented?

And that's the origin of this AU. I've loved the Next Gen concept for a long time, inspired entirely by My Little Pony, because there are so many great Next Gen AUs. Since no one in Abgerny has done this concept before except for Fanchilds, I'm taking the liberty of officially launching my Next Gen AU into this fandom!

Finish? Now, let's get to know the fanchilds of my AU!

And that's all the information for my Next Gen AU characters! I've gone all out with the details so everyone can clearly see their backgrounds and personalities, not just for show. In the next post, I'll show a relationship chart of how each of them feels about my other fanchild characters.

And yes, I retconned Molly and Milly's nationality to Scottish. Why? To make Korina and Colin, who are mixed race like the other fanchild characters, make sense. And also, since Milly is Molly's biological older sister in my AU, she has to be the same nationality as Molly. I know it's sudden, but it was necessary! Their backgrounds remain the same, though.

That's all for today. Feel free to ask questions about my fanchild characters or my Next Gen AU in general! But remember, if you see any questions I haven't answered, remember that answering them would automatically spoil my Next Gen AU, and I reserve the right to withhold those answers to prevent spoilers.

Eh, looks like Valentine's Day is almost here, huh? But I'm busy on that day. Plus, it's been ages since I drew Birdo x Zee, even though they're one of my top favorite pairings. So, here's some artwork for all you Birdo x Zee fans!

Some of you might be wondering why Birdo looks like that in this artwork? Why didn't I draw him based on the original?

Simply put, I headcanon Birdo as a "black-throated magpie-jay" because this bird is incredibly beautiful and cool, especially its crest (one of my favorite underrated bird species). and I drew him based on that inspiration. Also, Birdo in my anthro design looks incredibly "bland" without Black-throated Magpie-jay motif in my opinion, and I really dislike it. So, I decided to add it for the sake of "aesthetic" instead of maintaining originality.

[ Black-throated Magpie-jay ]

And Zee's bee species name? No, I wasn't inspired by anything. I just drew her and randomly gave her anthro body design, lol. And yes, I also changed her mouth into realistic bee mandibles because I wanted her to still have an insect-like quality, and keeping the mandibles didn't make her look scary at all in my opinion.

As for why I had Birdo holding a blue hydrangea and Zee holding a sunflower? You might think I just drew them to match their main colors, but I didn't draw those flowers to have any positive meanings in this art at all. How so? Try searching for the negative meanings of these two flowers on the internet, and you'll discover that I headcanon these two have completely "questionable personalities" that ordinary people might consider "problematic," but somehow it works when they find common ground to work together. (I'm going to get beaten up for this, but it's the main reason why I ship this pairing.)

(This art was drawn to test lighting and coloring the characters to blend in with the background, as I'm very weak in this area and still developing my skills. And no, I didn't draw the background. I randomly found it on the internet.)

I'm not a furry artist, but I wanted to try drawing an anthropomorphic version (or what's commonly known as anthro-furry) of Abgerny characters. Not just taking the normal-mode Abgerny head and pasting it onto a human body. I don't have any prejudice against artists who draw Abgerny that way; I just see it so often it's become repetitive. And of course, it will be my own version of anthro. I don't really stick to the rules of any particular drawing style; I draw what I feel like. I definitely won't be drawing hair in an anthro character design because hair often obscures some distinctive features of animals that don't have hair to begin with, and I don't like that most of the time.