samuel @thriftstoresushi - Tumblr Blog

my sons and i stared at a bug today for 20 minutes

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sometimes i wish the void would ask me how im doing instead of relying on me just yelling

are you really married if your wife doesn’t just tolerate you

#linc.selfie #do i tag this?

don’t mind me, just screaming into the void

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i traded the sam and colby brain cell for one (1) corn chip.

no regrets

#food #i spelled my name wrong

icedlatteslut

#body image #WIFE WIFE WIFE

i gossip with emerson all the time about the cats, and their drama. she’s invested in this season of as the cat tree turns.

life is weird and wonderful and i am eternally grateful

don’t tell my wife how i look at @walmartcorpsevoice

kiss the homies happy valentine’s day 😘

#linc.selfie #do i tag this?

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hey guess what, i became a dad last night :)

emerson sage golbach made her grand entrance and i i think i like her more than my wife (who likes paramore more than me so it’s fair)

#babies

i feel like a hermit crab who made a soda can a home

man, having to be funny all the time is hard

thinking heavily about how someone brought up the point once that maybe rocks are squishy until we touch them

#can’t sleep club

kind of feeling like a deflated party balloon

you know how it is ig

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i just asked my wife if she’d like to be my valentine and she replied “let me get back to you on that”

i- ma’am you’re my WIFE??

the amount of times i’ve been woken up out of a dead sleep by my wife crying over animal crossing would be concerning for anyone other than me

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