Thorin x Reader- Could Have, Could Be
Warnings: Character death, sadness,
Note: I was balling my eyes out the entire time I was writing this, I hope you all enjoy.
“You?” Thorin began, shock filling his sickly veiled eyes, his expression wild and almost that of a scared animal in a corner.
Fearful, wronged, shocked, ready to attack.
“You dare betray the King!” He shouted, the crown on his head showing just how ‘magnificent’ his words were as you bit your tongue, staring at the Company around him in battle armor. The Elves held their place below the barricaded entrance, waiting for their King’s command as they watched the Dwarven King with unease.
“I didn’t do it to betray you, Thorin, I did it to save you…” You talked lowly, even Thranduil had to strain his ears to hear you. “You are not the Dwarf you were in the Shire! You’ve changed, that stone…. That stone corrupted your mind and your heart,” You spat back at him with equal agitation, your voice laced with sadness as you recalled all the moments he treated his fellow Company like dirt because he was now ‘The King’.
“A king without regard to his people is a king I will not stand beside.” You finished, taking the silver bead out of your hair and slamming it to the ground, the sound echoing like dragons roar. Before anyone could say anything else, you made your way to the side of the barricade, using the rope Bilbo left and made your way to Gandalf, not letting him have the chance of throwing you over it in anger.
You didn’t betray him, but you knew that if he knew Bilbo did, it would be the end of the Company. You were just a magic user to them, you didn’t mean much to them, you told yourself to take away the pain of seeing their faces of shock and hurt that you would take away the king’s jewel in hope for peace.
The wind howled past your eardrums as you ran up the snowy landscape, your boots almost slipping on the ice several times as you felt your heart beating rapidly, threatening to burst out of your chest. The last thing you recalled hearing, ‘Thorin’s badly wounded, he may not make it.’
If there was one thing you were, it was loyal. You would not sit by while he died. The memories of Thorin throughout the journey passed through you like a movie rewinding and pressing start back at the beginning. How he accepted your opinion over Gandalf, how he treated you with respect and kindness like you were his own kin. How he began to trust you and tell you stories late at night beneath the stars about how great Erebor was, and how happy he was you were with him to experience it again.
Blinking back the tears in your eyes, you caught sight of Bilbo leaning over something brown, narrowing your eyes you bit back a gasp.
That was Thorin on the ground.
“Bilbo” Thorin rasped, a cough ripping through his throat as he struggled to find the words to say. An apology? A last-minute request for forgiveness for his despicable actions? A farewell? Thorin’s mind was scrambled as the pain in his chest kept growing,
“I’m glad you’re here..” Thorin rasps out as Bilbo moved to put pressure on the wound. “Shhh.. Don’t speak Thorin, don’t speak,” Bilbo shushed him, tears filling his own eyes as he felt the blood seeping onto his fingers.
“I wish to part from you in friendship,”
“No no no, you aren’t going anywhere Thorin–” Bilbo sucked in a hiccuping breath, “You are going to live!” Bilbo asserted, his tone seeming like he was trying to convince himself rather than convince Thorin.
“Bilbo!” You shouted out, running up to the two, eyes widening at Thorin’s state.
“Oh thank goodness you’re here, Thorin see? You’ll be alright, we’ll get you all fixed up.”
“(Y-Y/N)…” Thorin rasped, his eyes softening upon looking at you.
“Don’t talk Thorin, save your energy,” You muttered at him, dropping to his side and searching through your bag.
“I have to have some of my shifting stones in here, come on…” Your hands fumbled with urgency, the pounding of your heart now banging against your eardrums as you nervously fumbled through your bag.
“(Y/N), I take back all my words and my deeds at the gate… You did what a true One would do, forgive me… I was too blind to see it…” Thorin’s eyes filled with tears as he realized the inevitable fate he got himself into because of his greed.
“I am so sorry…” He breathed out, his chest rising up and down rapidly as he tried to control his breathing.
“I am so sorry to have led both of you into such peril…” A lone tear slipped down Thorin’s cheek. His last memory with you was him damning your name, telling you he wished you were never a part of the company, not holding you and telling you how much he loved you.
Closing your eyes, you pulled your hand out with no shifting stone to be found, one tear slipping from each eye as you looked over to Thorin,
“No, we’re glad to have shared your perils,” You smiled sadly, your hand gripping his, as you prepared yourself to do what you believed was best.
“What’re you doing?” Thorin sniffled, seeing your hands begin to light up as they grabbed hold of his one hand. “No, (Y/n), don’t you dare,” Thorin begged, feeling the pain lift from his chest.
A pained cry left you as you lurched forward, burying your face in his chest. It was already too late.
“No!” Thorin yelled at you, “Stop it, give it back, (Y/n)!” He shouted, hot tears scalding his cheeks as they fell from his eyes, your cries of pain leaving him helpless as you gripped his hand tightly.
“What’s happening?!” Bilbo demanded, not understanding what was going on.
Your cry choked off with a shuddering sigh, looking up to the sky with tears rolling down your cheeks.
“I took it away…” You mumbled, blood beginning to bloom on your chest where Thorin was impaled. Your breathing began to grow labored as your eyes glazed over slightly. Losing your ability to hold yourself upright, you laid on Thorin’s chest, your eyes slipping shut as you cried silently.
“She took my wounds, so I would live…” Thorin choked out, holding you tightly to his chest, sobs wracking his frame as the Company gathered around.
“Thorin…” You began, your voice nothing more than a pathetic whisper, “Be the king we always knew you could be…” You finished, looking up at him one last time, before your eyes fully glazed over, the light draining out of them like clouds filling the sky and hiding the sun, your chest giving one last labored breath before it was no more.
Bilbo moved your bag to hold your hand one last time when suddenly the contents spilled out. At the very bottom was a shifting stone, the one you began looking for only minutes ago.
Bilbo held it up with a pained cry, realizing your death was for nothing. It could’ve been prevented, you could have lived.
You could have been a mother, you could have been Queen of Erebor.
But as the cries of the Company caught his ears, Bilbo’s heart broke bit by bit as he realized all you could have been.
And all that you never would be.
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