Some Mad Hope

“That might be one of my GOATs. I’m going to write about it in my diary”.

Today marks one year since I found out that there was a 95% chance I had cancer. One year since the start of the hardest week of my life and then the hardest year of my life. I am mostly grateful but today also feels hard and heavy.

Today I said to my therapist that having cancer ~wasn’t that bad~ and her response made me feel so cared about etc. and I’m just so very grateful.

Might be feeling hopeful about something

I keep what I can of you

I never want to forget him running his fingers through my hair and holding me while I cried.

My therapist cried in session after I said I was scared I'm going to die from cancer and I feel so many things but mostly that I love her.

This morning my therapist told me she can see it in my eyes when I’m depressed (vs. just sad) and tonight the guy I’m sleeping with told me he can see it in my eyes when something ~feels good~ so honestly?? She contains multitudes!!!

Not me crying over the lyric “and you stay until the morning”

If he wanted to he would!!