oh how i wish i was those strawberriesâŚ

Love Begins
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â
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TVSTRANGERTHINGS
One Nice Bug Per Day
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Not today Justin
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occasionally subtle
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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if i look back, i am lost
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@thisblogwillselfdestructin54321
oh how i wish i was those strawberriesâŚ

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happy pride to Him
i need feminism because when jesus does a magic trick itâs a g**damn miracle but when a woman does a magic trick she gets burned at the stake
fabulousÂ
i mean they did also kill jesus. that was a pretty significant thing that happened. like i understand where youâre coming from here but they very much did kill jesus.
if you think about it, in their effort to be the least sexual cereal, cornflakes are actually the most sexual cereal, on account of the fact that most cereals are 0% concerned with sex in any way
ontologically is literally, ethereal is pretty, POV is pretend, junkie is addict, satire is parody, parody is mockery, death threat is hate mail, gaslighting is convincing, manipulative is abusive, abusive is toxic, toxic is problematic, problematic is annoying. write that down

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People still doing "do you think voting can fix this" memes when the answer to the question "when did voting last end an authoritarian regime" is "two days ago"
the real answer to almost every "does [identity A] belong in [identity B] spaces" question is actually just "these spaces are informal social groups and if you're cool you can hang, don't worry about it"
You can be Homer Simpson at the lesbian bar. It's fine. Don't worry about it.
not without those fire exits I'm not. have fun in your death trap, ladies
[ID: A joke article titled, "Man Building Up Courage to Listen to Favorite Band's Recent Stuff." Attached is a picture of a man putting on headphones, seated in a chair. End ID.]
and they are the bestest of friends

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âI hate school Iâm sorry Malalaâ- Funny yet poignant. Acknowledges both the difficulty of the task and the fact that doing that task is a privilege. Gives credit to the people who fought for that privilege with a tongue in cheek acknowledgement of the irony of the initial statement
âIâm just a girl I should be home baking bread not doing calculusâ - at best historically uninformed at worst leaps decades back in time. Refusal to acknowledge the charged history of education and slights the centuries of womenâs labor it took to reach this point
tw lying
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when youâre a gay lion and you accidentally tried to introduce your lesbian lioness friend to one of her own exes at a gay bar and she goes into the bathroom and bitches you out for not being able to tell her endlessly rotating cast of girlfriends apart which isnât really fair because first of all they all keep dyeing their hair different colors and second of all she keeps getting back together with different ones at different times and meanwhile youâve been âsingleâ for like 8 months but are spending a lot of time with one specific guy who works at your old co-op and were going to excitedly tell her about it tonight but now youâve ruined the whole subject of dating by trying to introduce her to her own ex at a gay bar (which is a watering hole. because youâre lions.)Â
>landlord of my building changes >new online portal for paying rent >required to set up an account with Bilt Inc. >Bilt will add $10 a month to my rent if I pay it using my debit card >look for ways to avoid this fee by paying directly through my bank account >required to set up an extra account with Plaid Inc. >Plaid demands the password to my bank account (!!!!!!!) to connect, after which their terms of service will allow them to monitor all of my financial activity and sell that data to the highest bidder >look for a way to set up my account through a regular ACH process without taking this massive security risk >download the Bilt app on my phone because it's the only way to directly contact their help desk >realize that the Bilt app has an ACH option for connecting my bank account that is available on the app but completely unavailable on their web portal (illegal?) >finally enter my routing and account numbers like a normal human being >app still tries to redirect me towards giving away my bank account password >avoid this again >Congratulations! Your account has been set up! >doomed to a future of both email and physical mail spam from Bilt trying to pressure me into a Bilt Rewards credit card that allows me to earn 4% of my spending back in Bilt Cash that can be redeemed at qualifying establishments, terms and conditions apply >this is considered an efficient mechanism for transferring money between two accounts
Nuke the entire financial industry.
(in sex ed class) this is stupid when are we ever gonna need to use this lol

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Britney Spears by Martin Schoeller 2003
is there anything as good as lying in a sunbeam
telling the truth in a sunbeam #honesty