Sup Bitches!
The First Family's prodigy has finally decided to become active on social media.
Name's Seth.
And yes, Sweet Tarts... that Seth.
Third and blessed son of Adam,
You know the one, the First Man, Adam. Yep.
Come on don't be too shocked, You thought this face card came by chance? Nah Just a good copy, remix and paste, Dollface.
#Blessedtobefuckinghot.🙏😏
Ole Man's favorite.
The one who took over after the Ole Man finally kicked the bucket and made sure my kids and descendants were raised right so humanity didn't get completely obliterated in that fuck-ass flood.
You're welcome, by the way. 😌🤘
Big condolences to my eldest brother's descendants, though. I wish they could've lived out their hundreds of years like mine did.
Anyway,
Paradise has been treating me pretty damn well. Heaven's nice.
Always good popping in to check on the Ole Man. Nice seeing him keeping busy.
I still love having little jam sessions with him too. 🥁🎸
It's fucking hilarious drowning out his guitar with my drums.
Oh, and for anyone who ever gets gaslit by dear old Dad...🙄
You know exactly why you want a drummer over guitarist, sweet tart.
The drums aren't the only thing I can pound around for hours.~
😇😈
Other family-wise?
I like catching up with the younger siblings. (Even the older baby brother.)
Listening to the dumb shit they get themselves into never gets old.
They really never change.
It's always nice hearing about whatever adventure they're on, or even the little accomplishments they're proud of.
🧡
Heavenly Duties
Guess everyone's supposed to put their heavenly duties in these things, so...
I work alongside the Death Angels.
I don't do the whole ripping-your-soul-out-of-your-body-and-dragging-you-to-judgment thing.
I'm usually the guy who shows up a few days, or maybe a week, before your body finally gives out.
I help your soul get ready for the jump from life to death.
That whole...
"Be not afraid."
Yeah.
Half the time that's guys like me.
We're there to help you settle in, calm your fears, and make sure you're as comfortable as possible before the big guys come to collect you.
Nothing glamorous.
Just helping people let go.
Honestly... I like the stubborn ones best.
The souls that refuse to accept it's their time.
There's something satisfying about helping someone make peace with the inevitable.
Guess that's about it for this part.
Now time for the lame ass shit…🙄 Yall Ready? Good cause aint much of a choice now huh?
Now be good, pay attention and read the lame shit, Sweet Tart.
Account Stuff & Rules
(Yeah these gotta be put up cause some folks dont know how to fuckin act.)
18+ only.
If you're a snot-nosed brat, you'll be blocked.
I'm centuries old. I'm not pathetically desperate for a kid's attention when there are plenty of grown-ass adults around.
Flirting?
Sure.
(Again... 18+ only. Deadass, don't test me.)
Playful flirting's fun.
Just keep it respectful.
And don't get jealous if someone else sends me a flirty ask.
You'll get your turn, sweet tart. 😉
Incest ships?
Absolutely not.
Family OCs, fan-kids, or anyone like that trying to ship themselves with me gets blocked immediately.
Miss me with that bullshit.
🚫
DMs?
No.
My page's public for a reason.
I don't do one-on-one RP through DMs.
The only exception is if you're another RP account wanting to plan a story.
Other Hazbin accounts, and OCs, are absolutely welcome.
Send starter asks whenever.
If I've got the time, I'll happily answer. ✌️
Seth's Lore
Seth was given to Adam and Eve during one of the darkest periods of their lives.
Their marriage had nearly fallen apart.
Growing up meant listening to constant arguments, watching his father's crushing guilt consume him, and living with a mother who was emotionally distant, sometimes outright cold.
After Abel's death and Cain's exile, much of the blame landed squarely on Adam.
People believed he hadn't done enough to protect his sons.
To Eve...
Heaven giving her another son felt less like mercy...
...and more like mockery.
She couldn't see Seth as one of her sons.
Only as a replacement for the blood she'd already lost.
Because of that, Seth never experienced the warmth his older brothers once had.
At least...
Not from her.
His father told him stories about the woman she'd once been.
Adam, despite his own grief, accepted Seth completely.
He simply became stricter with him.
Not out of resentment.
Out of fear.
Fear of making the same mistakes twice.
Even then...
Seth became Adam's light during some of the darkest years of his life.
He gave Adam a reason to keep trying.
To repair his marriage.
To keep moving forward instead of drowning in the past.
As more children were born, Seth naturally slipped into the role of dependable older sibling.
He helped raise over sixty younger brothers and sisters.
He stepped in whenever Adam was exhausted, or Eve became overwhelmed and emotionally withdrew.
By the time Seth became a man and was given his own wife...
He'd already spent decades helping raise children.
Becoming a father came naturally.
After all...
When you've helped raise over sixty siblings before having your own firstborn...
You're practically a professional….
-Present Day -
Heaven has been peaceful for Seth.
He takes his work seriously, but enjoys the freedom eternal life offers.
His favorite assignments are the difficult souls.
The stubborn ones.
The ones who fight death every step of the way.
Helping those people finally find peace gives him the greatest sense of purpose.
As for his wife...
The two eventually chose to separate.
Not out of hatred.
Not because they stopped caring.
Simply because spending endless centuries together didn't feel healthy or realistic.
It was a mutual decision.
They've both embraced their freedom while remaining on good terms.
(They still sometimes find their way back to each other.)
I think that's everything.
Catch ya around, Sweet Tarts. 🥁
Don't be too shy now~
.
