The Stench of Summer
I'm plodding slowly during my morning run in the park on the path by the sea. There are a few dog walkers, a few cyclists and some runners too. I listen to an audiobook and I can hear the sounds outside my head clearly. That's how I hear heavy steps catching up from behind. A faster runner, no wonder there. A man in his late-20s, maybe early 30s, passes me by. Judging by his almost painful expression, he's not enjoying it nearly as much as I do. He wears short tights and some kind of colorful shirt made of synthetic fabric, what we call "technical". He is enveloped in a cloud of body odour so rich, it would make the smelliest Roquefort envious. I gag, then ease off my pace and let him put the distance, a lot of it, between us. I still smell him for minutes after. It makes me wonder if he somehow damaged my nasal paths and now everything will stink of him for the rest of my life. Luckily, the air and my nose clear after a (long) while.
Town of Split on the Adriatic coast of Croatia is my temporary home for the past several years. It's almost ideal for running - it has mild winters with lows at around 10Β° C. And, it has summers at around 30Β° - 35Β°. Yes, I know, I said ALMOST ideal. In the summer I get up at 5am, when the night finally cooled off the heat of the previous day, and go for my daily 10k. When I return, there's usually not a dry patch on me. It's a very sweaty weather. Which is also one of the earliest things I noticed about the town: people sweat! Of course they do, the sun is so hot, you could fry an egg just by holding it in your palm. From the moment I leave our air-conditioned home it takes a quick minute until I'm bathed in sweat. While there's nothing I can do about the circles under my arms and wet marks along the spine on my shirt, at least I try to stop the smell by using antiperspirant deodorants and taking frequent showers. Which, sadly, isn't really a habit of many of my new neighbours. Quite a few times I had to cut my coffee short because the smell coming off men sitting at the table next to me made my eyes water. In the recent face-mask-wearing reality, we found a disinfectant spray with long lasting refreshing scent and I douse my mask in it, because more often than not the person in front of me in the cashier line reeks. It's not completely foolproof, but it saves my smelling cells.
I walk along one of those charming narrow Mediterranean streets framed with stone houses and a young woman passes by. She's almost pretty, with a touch too much make up, botoxed lips and blonde hair which shows her true brunette nature underneath. She wears stylish white sneakers with some golden shiny decorations (they like glitter here), light breezy summer blouse and stylish 3/4-length pants. And, oh boy, does she smell! She wafts on a cocktail of body odour ripened to perfection, mixed with copious amount of sweetly perfume. It puts me in danger of losing my breakfast right there in her wake. So you see, it's not only men.
What baffles me is β those people, these women, they grew up with steamy summers. They sweat their whole lives. They stink their whole lives. One would think, by now they'd figure out how to deal with it. Take, for instance, good ol' stinky me! I was tricked on a couple of occasions early on; I stayed outside running errands without a shower break, and, alas, without a deodorant in my pocket. I watched people moving away from me. Heck, I wish I could have moved away from me! But, see, I learned! Now in the heat of summer in my pouch I carry a small pack of wet wipes and the aforementioned antiperspirant. When I'm away from the shower and exposed to high temperatures for too long, I find a washroom, wipe my smelly areas and re-apply deodorant. It only takes a minute! And if I could, I organize my days so that there'd be a shower break every few hours.
I understand runners shouldn't be judged for sweating. That's actually quite commendable, sweating it out on a long run. But, they could learn to wear fresh shirt for every run. If possible, not the technical one! I know, it's the bragging right to wear shirts from the race we conquered, and those are mostly plastic-fabric kind, the one that keeps stinking of sweat even when you freshly take it out of a washer. Maybe keep those for cooler weather, wear it over a long-sleeved shirt. For the summer though, put on something fresh. And, no one said a runner shouldn't apply antiperspirant before the run! It may not stop the odour completely, but it will lessen the ripening.
