please listen to stereomyth

for a long time now, one of my go-to phrases is "shake it like a can of beans." im not really sure where this came from, but i've been saying it for three years or so. it never really occurred to me that this was unusual until yesterday when i was bouncing a baby in a rocker a little too violently (he was having a great time, it just wasnt exactly sending him to sleep) and i went "sorry, im shaking him like a can of beans over here" and both my coworkers reacted like i had said something insane

one of the babies was getting picked up and started screaming as soon as her dad pulled her from her crib (where she'd been sleeping) and i instinctively said "that's what we in the industry call: baby moding" and he started laughing so hard he almost dropped her

i legiterately always feel like that person on reddit who posted "is it weird if i go on a walk like is everyone gonna be freaked out". i feel like that every minute of every day

fear not: you can also “attack” your friends even outside of art fight, so if you miss the chance to before august 2nd you can always get them after with no repercussions. No crime will be committed either way and its actually fine to draw art for others at any other time of the year

we named it the computer mouse because it fit so comfortably in our hands and it reminded us of ancient times where our ancestors put their palms over the backs of cave mice and shuffled them across the ground to move the cursor on their cave wall mounted gaming monitors

when you try to get into the png nightclub but you see the dotted rectangle surrounding the bouncer stretch him wider to block the entrance cus ur not on his clipboard

when people who want to be vaguely progressive say 'nature' all secular style but it's painfully obvious they mean 'god' while thinking they don't mean god

"natural behaviour" "the natural body" "nature intended" "nature created" no da fuck it didn't

“Culture tends to argue that it forbids only that which is unnatural. But from a biological perspective, nothing is unnatural. Whatever is possible is by definition also natural. A truly unnatural behaviour, one that goes against the laws of nature, simply cannot exist, so it would need no prohibition.” - Yuval Noah Harari

ive thought about the possibility of being plural or something for the past several years because i am not consistent in the slightest but i just dont know. i dont have gaps in my memory or anything but my memory is just terrible in general But i think thats cos i do the same shit every day. even if something happens to break up my routine i can never remember anything that isnt vague. im also 18 but i think people are supposed to have more of an identity by that age? maybe i just hate myself and think i dont have an identity. idk. it seems like itd just be a lot easier to see myself as a bunch of different people even if im just lying to myself lol

ive done some thinking over the past like 2 weeks and this is like almost definitely the case. humiliating. But being aware of it has been making me infinitely less suicidal lately so i win

nevermind im wrong about everything tranquilize me