The World Of Henry

Hello little world. I'm back with a vengeance.

Whilst you were all sleeping; preoccupying your meaningless existences with the little birdy, the big F, the sweet crush, blah blah blah... I was plotting.

Subject: *Kneels before King Charles-Henry I* I follow King Charles-Henry I! The dutiful and rightful leader and God.

His Royal Holiness: That is us. What is the reason for this disturbance?

Subject: I wish to profess my love for my King and Master, and to ask forgiveness of my mediocrity. I am not good enough to kneel before you.

HRH: We are glad that you recognise these facts and will accept your apology.

Subject: Thank you oh benevolent King and Master. Can you forgive my mediocrity any further and allow me the honor to pray and pay homage to you? I would like to give your holiness this premium steak, I am aware that your royal holiness should be given the best sacrificial foods possible, and I hope that this steak, cooked to your preferences, will be adequate for you.

HRH: It will do.

Subject: Thank you your holiness, please accept then, this sacrificial food and my homage to you.

HRH: You are welcome, our subject, we will accept your gifts of homage and you may leave our holy prescence with your life.

The first commandment of Henriality.

We expect our subjects and followers to kneel down and pray to us for forgiveness of their mediocrity and make promises of becoming better subjects/followers. In addition, all subjects/followers must pay homage to us a minimum of three times a day. This should involve sacrificial food - preferably of a meat variety (BRING US THE BACON!)

That is all for Commandment One. Be grateful that we are a benevolent Dog.

Your Dog God and Rightful King,

Good Morning Our Subjects,

Have you ever noticed that the word Dog is God spelt backwards? We have. Today is a brand new day to worship us. We are creating a new religion. It is named Henriality. You shall worship at our paws and pause for our commandments. 10 is not enough, unlike these lesser religions. We shall have 365. One for every day of the year. And these shall be updated every year. One commandment shall be posted per day. So stay alert!!

Your Master,

Hmm.... perhaps your wits are beginning to become amusing. Your position in our rule will have to be our Jester. We say 'will have' because you literally have no choice. We own you. So. Report for duty at 0600 hours. If you are late we will have your head on a spike to garnish our halls.

May we remind you that we know all. Who you are. Where you live. You are ours. We have the ownership certificates to prove this. Do not laugh. This is reality. Dog Society is real and we will have our Jesters!

Have a nice day.

Your Master,

Dear Slaves *ahem* we mean, faithful subjects,

We have been very busy of late, and we have neglected you. We are not sorry for this, it is our right to neglect you. Nonetheless, you will now be pleased to see that we are back, and ready to continue our rightful dictatorship over you. Our first ruling is that all of you must send us fanmail every day. You must tell us your original reasons why you love us and deserve to be our subject. The best reasons shall be rewarded with our attention, which is highly valuable.

Our second ruling is that you must repost my posts and aid in increasing our follower base. We are the rightful leader - forget the corgies - We are a KING Charles Spaniel. Hence our royal status can not be denied. We will take over the world, it may take time, but it will be done. 

More rulings will come, however it is now time for our pamper session and that takes priority over you unimportant plebs.

Keep following! (as if you have a choice!) Your Master,

I OWN YOU

It is official. If you are reading this then you belong to me. I have made various *ahem* political dealings with individuals who own your freedom and through such negotiations your freedom has been sold to me. Hence with, you shall all be my minions. Resistance is futile. I know where you live!

Your Lord & Master

I Follow Henry, Our Dutiful Leader! There is a Fly in the living room. :) FLY! A big juicy one.

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Dear Blaaaaar,

I own you now. I will not be diverted from my goals by Flies. Even if they are supremely delicious. I will become the world's greatest dictator, with the support of minions like yourself.

Keep Following.

In the future you will address me as 'Master' or similar. You will submit to my demands, for I will control the entire world soon.

I am Henry the dog. I am seeking world domination. I aim to achieve this with my deceptive cute looks and my cunning mind. So watch out. I will be your master soon.

I am a terrible dog.. or am I!?