Good Morning Fire Eater

I’ll lay my gun down I’m done with this one I’ve lost my home Do you feel the same way? You never speak so I’ll never know Let’s try to keep our voices down instead Of making these messes we can’t take back

I’m only a man I’m not a god And I’m only afraid of all my faults because I’m not And maybe I’m a mess I’m not mistaken I’ll break my plans I can’t stop shaking All my troubles seem so far

Did you leave me blinded? Oh I couldn’t see straight No I couldn’t see straight I’m only trying to breathe the same way I’m not making you promises That I can’t keep today Cause I’m only a man I’m not a god

I didn’t walk away because I wanted to, or because I didn’t want to deal with things anymore. I had to leave because I couldn’t go another day feeling the way I did and I knew that nothing would ever change, and every single day it was killing me just the tiniest bit more.

Every day they add words to the dictionary, and have yet to add a word that incapsulates the way I felt, or the way I feel, and if the people that invent words couldn’t think of one, I sure as hell cant.

20 months of my life that I wouldn’t change for the world. If I could forget it all, and play it over and over again I would because everything that happened was beautiful.

My world, the love was real, there’s no denying it on either end I’m sure but things didn’t fall into place the way I sort of always hoped they would, you’re my best friend and always will be, and at the same time my kryptonite. I would fly across the world and back again to make you smile if you asked me to, I would show you all of the beautiful things the world has to offer and make sure you know that you’re the most precious gift the world has given me.

You’ve changed me in a lot of ways. I know when to joke, and I know when to be serious. I know how to be responsible, but also know what it’s like to have a good time. I’ve grown into a man that I would never have been if it weren’t for you, and if I could have you here by my side I would without a second guess.

My girl.

You never really were, at least not on paper, maybe not to you, maybe not to anybody.

I could never replace you, and I wouldn’t even know where to start if I decided to. I love you more than you’ll ever begin to know.

I couldn’t tell you the last time I cried so much, or cared so much about any one thing. I felt my heart being crushed when I last spoke to you, and it was an uphill battle to even speak at all, my throat closed, I could hardly speak. Forced to make a decision I didn’t want to make, because if I didn’t I don’t know how much longer I could have taken it before I lost my mind.

If I could have stayed just one more day I would have.

I love you, I always have and I always will. You’re the girl of my dreams, and you always will be.