this is the most relatable calvin and hobbes comic i have seen
NASA
Sweet Seals For You, Always
tumblr dot com

pixel skylines

izzy's playlists!
The Bowery Presents

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
KIROKAZE
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hello vonnie

Product Placement

#extradirty

Love Begins
untitled

oozey mess

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
sheepfilms
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Today's Document
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@thevictoriousone
this is the most relatable calvin and hobbes comic i have seen

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jellyfish have to be kept in a round tank because if they're in a tank with corners they'll get stuck in them. I think that's beautiful. god's stupidest little plastic bags (affectionate)
Also when being bred in captivity(this is done at my work and my job is to teach people about it) to get them to reproduce from the polyp stage of life, we have to intentionally cause them enough stress to reproduce but not enough to harm them. Lately we’ve done that by cleaning their habitat extra well, makes them think the word is ending
Free service with ads: Well, if I'm not paying for it they have to foot the bill somehow.
Paid service with no ads: Well, if they're not funding it with ad revenue, they need to charge us something.
Paid service with ads: Well that's bullshit.
"We used to be a paid service without ads, but now we're putting ads in it! If you want the ad-free version you have to pay more for preeeeemium": Fuck you fuck you fuck you
honey is the only food product that never spoils. there are pots of honey that are over five thousand years old and still completely edible
i also want to point out we know it tastes the same even after thousands of years b/c archaeologists who discovered two thousand year old honey tasted it. presumably right after they looked at each other and went “what the hell here goes nothing”
I’m pretty sure they also identify human remains by taste. Archaeologists are straight up freaks.
No, no no… you identify bone from rock or other substances by touching it to your tongue. If it sticks, it’s bone. The taste itself has nothing to do with it. And most archaeologists won’t lick human bones if they know they’re human.
…and I realize that doesn’t actually do much to prove archaeologists aren’t freaks.
mai nam is jane and wen i dig i fynde some roks both smol and big i put my tung upon the stone for science yes i lik the bone
I’m sitting with a bunch of archaeologists and we just laughed so hard we CRIED we’re getting tshirts with this on them
I will never ever get tired of seeing bredlik poems. It is really one of the seminal art forms of the century. I am not being sarcastic.
If I ever don’t reblog this, assume I’m dead and archaeologists are licking my bones.

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Anyone else already dreaming of Autumn? 🍂
I kinda have no reasoning for this one.
You know Jones soda cap, as a tumblr user i can actually say i think I have.
[ID: a picture of a hand holding a bottle cap from a Jones soda. The inside of the cap reads: You haven't seen all the colors of the sky. End ID.]
It’s interesting how diseases rip through schools at incredible speeds despite being in an arguably modern, clean(ish) environment. I wonder if it has something to do with the whole “you need a doctor’s note to excuse your absence of even one day” combined with the average price of going to a doctor, the lack of education on things like “you’re still contagious even after the fever goes away”, and the overwhelming message of “if you don’t struggle through it, you’re a failure!”
On my campus there tends to be a problem where even I you have the doctors note professors will still take points off of your final grade regardless of how sick you are. I’ve seen people show up to class with the stomach flu, pneumonia, respiratory infections and all sorts of other contagious ailments.
Here’s a fun story:
The school system I grew up in put an absolutely ungodly amount of pressure on kids to Show Up Every Day No Matter What. Many schools are like this, but looking back, my town’s was borderline fucking dystopian. They asked me why I didn’t just “postpone” a surgery at one point— when I was fifteen— to give you an idea of how monumentally obtuse these people were.
So, in elementary school, I started having chicken pox symptoms, right? They were mild because I was vaccinated (yay!) but my mom recognized them quickly and took me to the doctor, because my mom is a reasonable human being with standards. The doctor said “yup, you’ve got those pox, it may seem mild but please for the love of god DO NOT take her to school, she is very contagious even though she may FEEL okay.”
So I had to stay home from school until I got clearance from my doctor to go back. I was an angry little gremlin the whole time, because I wanted to go to the school library and read books about the human skull, but my mother said, “no, you cannot leave this house, and do not scratch the bumps please.” So I sat at home and tried not to scratch the bumps, like a good little gremlin.
A few days into my Chicken Pox Related House Arrest, we got a letter from the school. I was far from the only person with chicken pox, as it so happened. Like… a tenth of my second grade class had Confirmed Pox. We all fell ill within DAYS of each other.
So how did this happen, you ask? Well, a kid had chicken pox, and he came to school anyway. “Ah, well perhaps they didn’t know,” you may very well say. “Maybe his parents didn’t notice!” No. No, they noticed. In fact they KNEW it was CHICKEN POX. They sent him to school anyway.
The kid’s parents…….. were, in fact, teachers at the school. And they KNOWINGLY made him go to school sick, because they didn’t want to risk hurting his precious “perfect attendance” record. They figured that since he wasn’t, like, Literally Dying, it was better for him not to miss school. Never mind the fact that they were actively endangering hundreds of little kids.
Fast forward to my freshman year of college. A kid came to class with mumps because he ‘couldn’t afford to miss’. Guess what happened? Mumps outbreak! Diseases are, as it turns out, good at being diseases! Vaccinations are phenomenal, but they can only do so much, and some people rely on herd immunity to not be killed by preventable illness.
This entire attitude needs to die. It’s dangerous. Food service workers are forced to show up sick, little kids are forced to show up sick, college students show up sick because they’re afraid of flunking out.
And on top of it all, misinformation campaigns are encouraging people not to get vaccinations! It’s 2019 and we’re flirting with the plague! Next thing you know some blogger is gonna be like “actually we should all be fucking rats and eating our meat raw, death to all science and god bless america”
Many kids at my school will show up really sick because we only get like three days of excused absences without a doctor’s note.
this is what those in literary academia call “foreshadowing”
(note the dates)
this post aged like an ice cube in an oven
worst part is! IT’S STILL HAPPENING! SCHOOLS AND WORKPLACES ARE STILL LIKE THIS!!! THEY LEARNED NOTHING!!!!!!!
Literally looking like the kind of note you find in a post apocalyptic horror game jesus
If only we as a society learned from our mistakes

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If you get into white work embroidery, you might discover cutwork. And when you start doing cutwork, you might get curious about incorporating detached elements. And before you know it the fabric is gone, you are making needle lace, and there goes the rest of your week.
Buttonhole stitch - not even once.
OP this is gorgeous, holy shit
rapid fire things i learned about my boyfriend this morning.
he has never seen disney's the little mermaid
he thought the song Poor Unfortunate Souls was from phantom of the opera
he has never seen phantom of the opera
he thought disney made phantom of the opera
he thought phantom of the opera was animated
"i couldve sworn i saw an animated hunchback"
...wait do you mean the hunchback of notre dame
he thought phantom of the opera was the hunchback of notre dame
Riga, Latvia
Compulsory Aliveness by Tabitha Lean

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person w adhd experiencing symptoms of adhd: why the fuck can’t I do this thing . I wish there was some explanation for this
I think it's actually essential to children's moral development to be exposed to short stories moderately beyond their reading level where a bunch of fucked up shit happens and then instead of offering a moral lesson or any sort of emotional or narrative resolution it just ends.