☄ 𝕤𝕦𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕟𝕠𝕧𝕒

That was the other issue though. Brie. Sure, Brie was dating Gabriel or whatever, but Nova didn't know how she felt about actually stepping on the woman's toes when it came to Elliott. That was a line she wasn't sure that she wanted to cross, even if she kind of already had. Plus, she had no idea how Elliott saw her. Was she just a friend, like a sister, or something more? They never really talked about it. Sitting in limbo was a hell of a thing.

Sighing out gently, she gazed up at Colette and chuckled. "You can touch my hair." The thought of Colette knowing better made her giggle from the depths of her. "Only you though. I'd absolutely punch someone else out," she laughed.

"That's true." Settling now, Nova relaxed once more in her friends lap. "I feel the same honestly." Thinking on it, time and time again Colette had proved to be more than a friend. She was family. "We're just safe with each other. No matter what." Closing her eyes, Nova let out a hum. "I always got you Lette. You know that right?" Nova knew that Colette kept things from her, but she figured it was for her own good. She knew that her friend had a tendency to get dark sometimes and she likely was just trying to save her from spiraling as well.

"I know..." It came out in a whisper. "The older I get... the more I think I've never really been in love either." It was an admission that she was sure Colette already knew. "In lust... sure... love... I guess, but in love that's something completely different. I think that when you're in love you never fall out of it." Opening her eyes, she looked up at her friend again. "I just think that it'll happen when you least expect it Lette. In the wildest way you'll just fall head over heels in love." Nova was beaming cheesily now. "And you'll be just like all the rest of us love stuck foolish woman." She poked her friend in the side now before her smile grew even brighter.

"Oh reaaally." Before she went on, her lips pulled in a tight line to stop herself from going any further, though her eyes were sparkling as she wiggled around happily against the cushions. Finally she just couldn't hold it anymore and she gushed. "You missed me. You looooooove me."

"I know you have me, bèbè. It is why I will always have you." The French came out thick then. Perhaps it was something about Colette's feelings and emotions that caused the accent to deepen, or was it the comfort she had around Nova? Either could be true. Or both, "But do not let it go to your head."

Nova was one of the only people Colette could be around for long periods of time and not end up in a tirade; she could sit and be her softest self (as soft as Colette got anyway) and not have to worry about someone taking advantage. It didn't mean her guard was ENTIRELY down but it meant a fuck of a lot more than it did with others, so there's that.

"I doubt any of us have. It is hard to scope out. Everyone, in the moment, thinks that they are in love. It's a chemical reaction in the brain meant to make things seem perfect so we'll crap out a bunch of kids..." She paused a moment, biting her tongue and pulling back her tangent. Nova had been good to her all the time they'd known each other (well, after they'd gotten through their rough patches) and she kind of owed her something more concrete, "I mean... I have never even felt anything like it. No one has ever made me feel as if I was their world or they were mine? I mean, present company excluded, this is entirely different."

Colette paused for a moment, drawing her fingers down to trace the bridge of Nova's nose, inhaling very deeply and offering, "If anyone deserves to get the true love story, it's you, Nova. " Again, such vulnerability and such raw honesty... she wanted her friend to know she'd be loved and should continue to be loved.

Then Nova had to go and Colette the whole thing and fuck it all up.

While she didn't actually throw her friend to the floor, she leaned over and bit the bridge of the nose she'd just been stroking, letting out a tiny, almost feral puppy growl, "Tu es une scorie," the French was given without any real venom to it, and the growl itself had ended in a very small, very strained laugh.

There was likely some level of Colette that would literally start to melt if she were too nice. Too long spent hating everything meant that when she loved someone it would be so hard to express at first and be almost painful. Maybe that meant she shouldn't ever get to be loved like that.

Tucking hairs behind her ear that had fallen out of her pulled back low bun, she ripped the page off her notepad and tossed it in the trash before she headed back out on the floor. Just another 30 minutes before she was free. Walking to the man sitting at one of the tables in her section she paused, listening to him whine before she put on a smile and asked. "Was there anything else I could get you?"

It wasn't good for Nova to put so much of herself out there. She was burning at both ends, and since Colette cared for her, she saw it and didn't like it. She knew she could never convince her to be as laisses faire about things like Colette is, but baby steps were good enough.

Colette's fingers shifted to settle on Nova's forehead, stroking there — tracing small patterns and touching near the hairline but never truly fucking with her hair because she knew better — and managed a small smile; tiny, but genuine. The truth was, Colette might have never been in love or never been hurt but both of those things are life-changing experiences; maybe she was missing out on some kind of growth in avoiding them, but in truth she just hadn't found anyone worth the effort in the romance department.

She was surrounded by philistines, generally.

"I mean we've sort of had to adapt. I'm not used to giving a shit about people like I give a shit about you and eventually I realized I had to tell you things." Anything Colette hadn't told Nova hadn't been out of wanting to lie to her, but more that it just hadn't occurred to her to bring it up. She didn't think it at that moment, but that was likely one of the ways a Gossip Girl blast would fuck her up.

"I mean you know this but probably have never heard me admit it: I've never been in love? I understand the concept of it, I mean, and I get that my constant complaints about it seem ignorant because of the fact that I haven't actually been in love in that romantic, gooey way, but at the same time maybe my brain's evolved to the point that I will avoid these things because I know what they are." She shrugs. Anything to justify her own choices in life, really.

She'd watched her parents marriage. She'd watched the divorce and the remarrying and the infidelity. She'd watched a lot of things happen in her life revolving around love and had seen what it did to the people who experienced it. Maybe that made her feel like some creature in the wild evolving gills because of the sudden shift in climate heralding a flood of her habitat; she's smarter than she looks, at any rate.

That was the other issue though. Brie. Sure, Brie was dating Gabriel or whatever, but Nova didn't know how she felt about actually stepping on the woman's toes when it came to Elliott. That was a line she wasn't sure that she wanted to cross, even if she kind of already had. Plus, she had no idea how Elliott saw her. Was she just a friend, like a sister, or something more? They never really talked about it. Sitting in limbo was a hell of a thing.

Sighing out gently, she gazed up at Colette and chuckled. "You can touch my hair." The thought of Colette knowing better made her giggle from the depths of her. "Only you though. I'd absolutely punch someone else out," she laughed.

"That's true." Settling now, Nova relaxed once more in her friends lap. "I feel the same honestly." Thinking on it, time and time again Colette had proved to be more than a friend. She was family. "We're just safe with each other. No matter what." Closing her eyes, Nova let out a hum. "I always got you Lette. You know that right?" Nova knew that Colette kept things from her, but she figured it was for her own good. She knew that her friend had a tendency to get dark sometimes and she likely was just trying to save her from spiraling as well.

"I know..." It came out in a whisper. "The older I get... the more I think I've never really been in love either." It was an admission that she was sure Colette already knew. "In lust... sure... love... I guess, but in love that's something completely different. I think that when you're in love you never fall out of it." Opening her eyes, she looked up at her friend again. "I just think that it'll happen when you least expect it Lette. In the wildest way you'll just fall head over heels in love." Nova was beaming cheesily now. "And you'll be just like all the rest of us love stuck foolish woman." She poked her friend in the side now before her smile grew even brighter.

"Oh reaaally." Before she went on, her lips pulled in a tight line to stop herself from going any further, though her eyes were sparkling as she wiggled around happily against the cushions. Finally she just couldn't hold it anymore and she gushed. "You missed me. You looooooove me."

NAFESSA WILLIAMS

while brie has threatened to sabotage nova, she had no plan to actually mess with the woman's career. while nova isn't someone she likes, brie doesn't typically mess with someone's literal business if they aren't metaphorically standing in the way of her moving up. but now that nova's actually pulled the plug, brie's happy to spin any lie to both cover her own ass, and shift the blame. while nova may be up and coming -- brie's word held more weight, especially when it came to what happened at the magazine. "sure," brie agrees, the sarcasm evident despite her level tone.

a chuckle passes her lips at the words sloppy seconds, eyes rolling. "i think you forget who called things off." brie points out, before adding: "and who he left you for." now, that wasn't necessarily the truth -- frankly, brie didn't care about the timing of gabriel and nova's break up, considering her 'relationship' had been for show. but, out of pettiness, she was more than happy to push the narrative that he'd left nova for her. "you know," she begins again, taking a half step forward. "i should have believed gabriel when he said you'd be unprofessional. since he has first hand experience of it." it's a lie, but she doesn't care. at least, not in that moment. nodding the remnants of the sd card, brie continues. "you’ll be hearing from the magazine’s legal team for that little stunt. security can escort you the rest of the way out."

Value yourself more, babe. The voice of her best friend rang in her head as she did just that. Nova knew her worth and the quality of her work rather Brie saw that or not. Getting harassed was not something that she signed up for and she was positive that she could make a complaint to HR but wasn't sure it would be worth it. Brie Barlow had everything under her crusty little thumb, especially at Q. Her complaint likely wouldn't even reach the ceiling.

Slinging the bags over her shoulder, her lips tucked inward at Brie's words. Oh she'd done it. Nova was sure to receive flack for this but at this point it would be worth it. Walking up to Brie, Nova stared at her hard before a smirk tugged at the corners of her lips as she whispered. "Say's the woman that got left at the alter." With that Nova turned waving the threat of Q's legal team off. "Oh bite me. I'm shaking in my boots."

So, upsetting Nova was not what she had intended. However, instead of immediately apologizing, she just got internally angry at herself and said all the awful things she usually reserves for others in her head to chastize herself. All while offering, "Your care should be selective, Nove. That's just how it should work. There should be no such thing as unconditional love, it should always be conditional and you should let go of it if it stops serving your fucking purpose otherwise you're just going to get torn to shreds."

As she's asked how she does it, she lifts her shoulders in a shrug, "Value yourself more, babe. That's really the best advice I can offer. No one is worth you being miserable, I don't care how cute their smile is or how often they bring you scones. You make them show you you matter or you leave."

Colette could very well be telling her best friend to leave HER at this point, but she'd shown Nova she loved her in her own way. More than once and often at the expense of her general aura of disillusionment. Nova mattered to Colette.

Not easily unnerved, Colette still balked at the mention of her secrets, but sank into the couch across from Nova with her feet tugged up beneath her, heels still on because she didn't have the patience to unstrap them, and exhaled. She didn't honestly know what Gossip Girl might have on her, but she was almost positive that Nova knew everything.

Case and point Colette. Nova loved Collette with her whole heart and a part of her left lung too. There was nothing in the world that Colette could do to shake her - and sometimes Nova felt like Colette tried. She knew that her friend wasn't used to the love and care that she showed, so it could be fear inducing and often times Colette ran from it but Nova would always be there for her friend, no matter what. It just felt natural to her.

"I value myself." The words came out more like a thought than a statement but she meant it. "I just know that love is healing and the world definitely needs more of it. You're right, not every one deserves a hundred percent of me and I'm going to work on that but spreading love is so beautiful and you know it Lette." Nova couldn't help it, she was born with a big heart and she wore it on her sleeve, despite how dangerous and devastating it could be.

She was lucky. Despite this huge flaw, she'd never truly been hurt. Yes, her sister passing was devastating but that's different. That's familiar. Blood and bone. Romantically, her most vulnerable place, she's just been coasting by. Yes, this is due to the fact that she'd been with Gabe for years and while their break up hurt her it wasn't earth shattering. She honestly had no idea how a heart breaking split would change her. Hopefully she never had to find out.

Nodding along to Colette, Nova shifted with a small hmm until she was laying down with her head in her friends lap, looking up at her. "That's true. We do know everything about each other, huh?" Shaking her head, she sighed out. "I'm not exactly ashamed about my dirt, I just don't want those snobby bitches to have yet another reason to turn their nose up at me, ya'know?"

brie hates the way the woman in front of her seems to think she has a leg up on her, as if nova has the upper hand. her composure remains, poker face intact as she crosses her arms over her chest. there was a certain truth to her words -- thanks to gossip girl, she can't exactly hide from the gory details of her love life. even worse, she can't hide from everyone's opinions on the matter, either. it was infuriating, and she'd spent the last week snapping at interns and giving death glares to any coworkers her uttered the words gossip girl. "is there a particular reason you've taken such an obsession with my sex life, nova?" she asks simply, as if she's truly looking for an answer. "i can see why you'd be jealous of me, but green isn't your color, dear." clearly unimpressed, brie looks the other up and down before continuing. "it looks fairly pathetic on you from my stand point, too."

Nova knew that Brie's word held a lot of weight, but she trusted her odds. She was well known and well respected in the film community. She'd be okay, even if Brie trash talked her. She'd be okay. That she knew. She was resilient. "I truly do not care," she told Brie as she grabbed her camera bag and unscrewed the camera from dolly. "Jealous? Girl you got my sloppy seconds." Breaking down her dolly, she placed it into it's bag as well. "I'd just think a little dick would break off some of that ice but I guess not," she scrunched her face at Brie. "Such a shame."

before brie has the chance to make quip about the 'professionals', nova points out the elephant in the room -- gabriel. it was only a matter of time before they found themselves in this conversation, the clear tension living between them being spoken into the world. brie doesn't know a lot about gabriel's relationship with nova, aside from the fact that it'd be on and off before their final break up. the woman in front of her had fucked gabriel over in some capacity, though brie didn't know how. (yet, at least) that, paired with the confusing connection brie now shared with him left her resenting nova, jealous of her. some mixture of it all that manifested itself in snide comments and hits to the ego. "excuse me?" a brow arches, choosing her words carefully given that a coworker or two is surely listening to them. "whatever do or don't do with gabriel is none of your business." brie settles on, giving nova warning look before adding: "i didn't sleep with him, if that's what you're so concerned about."

Slowly her eyes shifted from being focused on the camera to Brie, watching her closely as her body language shifted. She could tell the blonde was a little uncomfortable and it made Nova's own body sing. It served her right. At this point Nova didn't care. She was a little jealous of what Brie and Gabriel had but it was only because she was lonely. Right? That was the only reason. "Oh, honey it's everybody's business, haven't you heard? You're the talk of the town right now thanks to you know who." Shaking her head, a smirk tugged at her lips. "Of course you didn't." The words were just dripping in sarcasm. While she didn't know Brie very well, she knew Gabriel intimately. He was passionate and a lover. A very accomplished lover at that. There was no doubt in her mind that he and Brie slept together after the KOTL's party. "You can spit that lie to everyone else but I know the truth."

"Was the getting back 100% mutual? You strike me as the kind of person who likes to... Take the reign and not let go." The two girls were in a very classic stand off and Indiya was used to dealing with people who thought they had the power when in reality, Indiya would come from under them and pull the rug. "If there's one thing I can promise you, it's him not getting back together with her."

The question stuck her and Indiya had her cornered. Of course, the break up wasn't completely mutual. He'd told her he was done and left. That was the extent of it. She didn't exactly want to be done, rather they had a deep love connection or not. Nova hated being alone and if nothing else, with Gabe she wasn't alone. Ignoring the question, she asked one of her own. "Why do you care if they're in a relationship or not. How does it affect you in the slightest?"