The Stupid Helmet

Hi Anon!

I'm not sure I would agree that people "give Jack a free pass", or at least to my knowledge I've never seen anyone suggest that. I also don't think he "provides the most money" after Pam runs away to Mexico. Jack Burkhart is being accused and charged with financial related crimes, he likely wouldn't have access to most of his assets by the time he goes to jail.

Likewise, he's going through a legal process and probably paying for the best lawyer available to him. If anything Jack Burkhart would be hemorrhaging cash from S5-S6 (until he's presumably sentenced, as Hyde mentions he's officially in jail in S7, the timelines a mess but whatever). And we can assume Pam and Jack get divorced at some point (which means more lawyers). My point is, lawyers aren't cheap and the legal process isn't swift.

I've never seen someone claim that Jack isn't emotionally neglectful, and I agree that any attempt to suggest otherwise lacks logic. Being an absentee father and supplementing time/affection with material things is a form of emotional neglect.

I feel like you might be speculating that people think he's a good parent because he loves his daughter. Unfortunately, a parent loving their child does not automatically mean they are a great (or even a good) parent. I say this not as a parent myself, but as someone who has imperfect parents whom I love very much (though I welcome any parents to add their perspectives).

Parents are not infallible, they do not always do the best thing or the right thing, but that also doesn't mean they're always bad/wrong or that they don't love their children. Parents are people, and people make mistakes (both big and small).

Does this excuse Jack being an absentee father? Absolutely not. But just because I don't personally agree with his parenting style or his priorities, doesn't mean I'm not going to look at his character from a full picture and try to understand why he might behave/think a certain way.

Good characters, much like real people, are multi-faceted. Jack can love his daughter and be so distracted by his own career that he doesn't notice how absent of a father he is (or what damage he's doing). Both things can be true.

As for an in-depth dialogue about absentee fathers and society's lack of criticism about it, that's a little beyond the scope of my intentions with this blog -- though I don't disagree with your sentiment.

With respect to Jack Burkhart though, could I use him as a narrative vehicle to communicate my views on a complex father/daughter dynamic or have him experience remorse for his actions in a fic I'm writing? Yeah totally. But saying "Jack Burkhart is a terrible father" and just leaving it there doesn't really do anything. He's a fictional character, he's not capable of feeling shame unless a narrative is woven around him to explore it, if that makes sense.

These are just my views on it, though!

Hi Anon!

Assuming there'd be a subplot involving a means with which Kitty (or someone else) could discover Hyde's birth certificate earlier and connect them sooner, this would be an interesting development -- although perhaps even more soap opera-y than it already is. Abusive mom abandons son, only for him to discover a rich, cool dad shortly after almost gives one whiplash!

In that same vein, I feel like Hyde would (initially) be far more anxious about living with W.B. than the Formans'. He would find the situation almost "too good to be true" and would be constantly waiting for the second shoe to drop. He would definitely feel like he doesn't "fit" with W.B.'s rich lifestyle and would struggle to adjust. He may act out in an effort to find boundaries or prove to himself (and his new family) that W.B.'s love is conditional and that he is unable to meet those conditions. These could be possible reactions Hyde may experience with the shock of meeting new family he previously didn't know, while coping with Edna's abandonment (which would still be very fresh in his mind).

Luckily for Hyde, I think W.B. is a good parent, who would be willing to put in the work to earn his trust and reassure his son that he's ready to make up for lost time and take care of him. It would be a slightly bumpier road, but I think they'd be able to build a strong father-son relationship, much like we see the beginnings of in the original show.

Part of why I think Hyde was able to transition so easily to an amicable relationship with W.B. is because of his time living with the Formans' though. By S7 he knows that even if it turns out bad, that the Formans' will support him as they have through other things (i.e. Edna, Bud, his 18th birthday, etc).

As a perhaps more comical aside, I could see Jackie trying to associate herself with Hyde more often, with them now being the two defacto "wealthy kids". Hyde would find this extremely annoying, but it could result in some funny exchanges (i.e. "Hyde, now that you're rich and no longer a common peasant, let me know if you want any lessons on how to comport yourself accordingly," to which I'm sure he'd say "Get bent").

Hi Anon!

Haha this is a wacky scenario indeed! I'm not sure the basement would be big enough to withstand the ego of two Jackie's being in the same room (a joke that someone on the show would undoubtedly say)! I think they'd probably react in the following way:

Eric: Most likely to make the above joke -- along with some comment about how the frequency of their combined voices may trigger a collapse in the space-time continuum (or something equally dramatic and snarky). Definitely wouldn't find her cool, and would be seeking a way to get rid of S6!Jackie as fast as he could (i.e. "Having one of you around is bad enough as it is").

Donna: I think S6!Jackie (knowing all the crap that happens to Donna in S4), would be inspired to try and cheer her friend up. Donna, in turn, would appreciate the support/attention -- which I think would make S4!Jackie jealous and then they might compete for "which Jackie is the better best friend". Which would come full circle back to Donna being overwhelmed/annoyed, and cause her to avoid Jackie and spend more time with Casey (ultimately not solving anything as far as that goes).

Hyde: He's in love with S4!Jackie who is (seemingly) in love with Kelso, while S6!Jackie is in love with him but he has no reason to believe/trust anything she has to say. In S4, to our knowledge, Hyde's still messing around with different girls every other week or so, which would be difficult for S6!Jackie to tolerate. He'd probably avoid her or band together with Eric in an effort to banish her from their timeline. I see Hyde being stressed out by S6!Jackie's attempts at reassurance or affection towards him, a lot of hijinks ensue, etc.

Kelso: Would automatically assume this means he has two girlfriends and which means he could possibly land a threesome (sort of?) -- neither of the Jackies are amused by or interested in this suggestion, and in fact he ends up making both of them incredibly angry with him. S4!Jackie pinches him and says "Michael!" admonishingly a lot. S6!Jackie kicks him in the shin and demands he keep away from her.

Fez: Is currently in a happy relationship with Rhonda in S4, and would most likely be the most "cool" with S6!Jackie. He'd treat her as much a friend as he treats S4!Jackie, and would try to get her to tell her all the secrets of the future. She would give him vague comments that aren't exactly helpful, but may warn him away from listening to Casey Kelso (we can only hope).

Jackie: Sort of already mentioned in Donna's blurb, but they would obviously be very competitive with each other. They'd bicker with each other about almost everything, I'd imagine. S6!Jackie would call S4!Jackie a fool for dating Kelso, while S4!Jackie would act defensively and be frustrated (especially considering how rocky her relationship was with Kelso). They might get heated enough to physically fight with each other, which I imagine Hyde and Donna having to help break up (Kelso would be egging them on, Fez would be suggesting they dump water on them -- again, and Eric would be too scared to get involved).

I'm not sure they'd come around to seeing eye-to-eye, unless they started saying complimentary things about each other (i.e. "Objectively, Jackie's style is impeccable", "Why, thank you, Jackie! I love what you've done with your hair by the way", etc.) which should that come to pass, S6!Jackie might be able to have a heart-to-heart and convince S4!Jackie not to debase herself in an effort to appease Kelso and salvage their toxic relationship. She might be able to settle some of S4!Jackie's worries and tell her something like "It'll hurt right now, but you're going to be so much happier with the next guy you date".

Overall I think it'd be a funny scenario with a lot of ridiculous moments -- but maybe a few heartfelt moments, too! 😉