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bagelbarr0n

Really funny one two punch on my dash this morning

utopians

stepped on a plum (overripe plum) (barefoot) it was on the driveway got out of the car and accidentally (didn't know it was there) stepped on the plum (warm) (on the ground) (it had fallen from the tree) barefoot (no shoes) wearing long pants (too long) (need to hem them) plum viscera got on them (the pants) unexpected plum on the driveway (hot plum) (97 degrees out) already super hungover (throwing up all morning) (should not have been driving at all) and I stepped out of the car (black car) (97 degrees out) and onto the plum (unexpected) (didn't know the plum was there) and it burst (plum nightmare on my only good pair of sweatpants) still we find ways to keep ourselves going from day to day

utopians

guess what post just got read aloud in poetry club tonite by an unknowing club member as I watched on in terror

jelloapocalypse

Someone asked me a while ago if I still had a photo of the worst sink I had ever seen while apartment hunting in Los Angeles. I assumed I deleted it so I didn't answer the ask and now it's gone, but as it turns out, yes, I do still have a photo of it.

villainessbian

impressive! it's ugly, impractical, gets water everywhere, makes too much noise, and the quote with shit kerning says you don't think music is even real

kuttithevangu

The thing about the moon is maybe you don’t need to write a poem about the moon. The moon’s been done, we’ve discussed it. It’s a coin a mirror an eye a lantern in the darkness. It’s a rock in space. It’s the dang moon we’ve all seen it! Is there something you can notice that’s is more surprising than the moon???

creekfiend

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piratedllama-art

Quarters only, please [x]

(done in procreate)

wanderingnelipot

thecollectibles

Uncle, how to get to the beautiful country? by Xiaoyu Wang

mareusu

what is it about things being gender neutral having to also be ‘masculine’. like, why can you wear a suit and tie and call it gender neutral but not a dress cause that’s feminine. why can you call people dude or guy as a gender neutral term but not girl cause that’s feminine. short hair is neutral but long hair is feminine. i mean i know why this is fully a rhetorical question but let’s think about that

theshehulkproject

last year, Pride in my city was held indoors for the first time. Instead of the traditional gender neutral port-a-potty, organizers had to contend with a building that had distinct men’s and women’s restrooms. They decided to fix it by covering up the signs with gorgeous sketches of gender nonconforming celebrities………. Which led to a few interesting problems, namely:

To parse what the new bathroom signs meant, you had to a) be able to identify Sam Smith and Janelle Monae from nice but ultimately pretty rough line drawings, b) be online/interested in celebrity gender enough to know what they have in common, and finally c) make the connection that these signs indicate gender neutral bathrooms

All of the celebrities were wearing suits, leading to some confusion that they had just made all of the bathrooms men’s bathrooms

#The art was good! It was just… not ideal as parsable signage #Pride

spreadassholesdotorg

theshehulkproject

Herb Alpert and His Tijuana Cat

#Music

zechery-deactivated20220114

Send me to Mars with party supplies before next august 5th

thebaconsandwichofregret

No guys you don’t understand.

The soil testing equipment on Curiosity makes a buzzing noise and the pitch of the noise changes depending on what part of an experiment Curiosity is performing, this is the way Curiosity sings to itself.

So some of the finest minds currently alive decided to take incredibly expensive important scientific equipment and mess with it until they worked out how to move in just the right way to sing Happy Birthday, then someone made a cake on Curiosity’s birthday and took it into Mission control so that a room full of brilliant scientists and engineers could throw a birthday party for a non-autonomous robot 225 million kilometres away and listen to it sing the first ever song sung on Mars*, which was Happy Birthday.

This isn’t a sad story, this a happy story about the ridiculousness of humans and the way we love things. We built a little robot and called it Curiosity and flung it into the star to go and explore places we can’t get to because it’s name is in our nature and then just because we could, we taught it how to sing.

That’s not sad, that’s awesome.

*this is different from the first song ever played on mars (Reach For The Stars by Will.I.Am) which happened the year before, singing is different from playing

shadows-ember

This is humanity

siawrites

Happy Birthday, Curiousity.

labelleizzy

Happy birthday, Curiosity.

the-cimmerians

Happy birthday, Curiosity.

icarus-suraki

Happy birthday, Curiosity!

lesnby23

Happy birthday, Curiosity!💕

emmathefanficgal

Happy Birthday, Curiosity

writedreamlie

Happy Birthday, Curiosity!! 🎉

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poast-bot

its not reccomended amd probably not legal but in a pinch a coyote can be your plus one to most events

roycohn

inspired by a rant i was going on elsewhere bc someone tweeted something very stupid and uninformed about hamlet and it got my back up as someone who took two single-text-focus english literature courses in college and they were on wuthering heights and hamlet, i now put it to all of you on here:

what's "your" shakespeare play?

hamlet

macbeth

the tempest

merchant of venice

midsummer night's dream

twelfth night

richard iii

othello

julius caesar

king lear

another not listed (specify in tags) (i really just put my own top 10 here nbd)

i have no particular feelings about any shakespeare play/results tag

Remaining time: 7 hours 7 minutes

#This is wild #Macbeth has the highest result??#Mine is Julius Caesar

lyraisnotonfire

favorite thing about tumblr is having a fandom in law. no i haven't watched this show and i'm not planning to. but my moot is having fun!! look how much they love it!!! i'm supportive from the sidelines!

lyraisnotonfire

it's like, i don't go here! but my friend does! so i know a bit about what's going on there even if i'm in a different school

palis-delon

I suddenly have feelings and opinions about a ship on a show I've never watched (I'm only 90% sure I have the names correct).

dykeselfcest

recent epidemic of adaptations that take lots of liberties with the source material and also, separately, are bad. but then if you say "this is bad" you get hit with "you're just being a source material purist and you don't understand the vision"...like. well actually I think it rules when people do new and different things with classic works. I just think these particular new and different things suck ass.

#Bring!!! Back!!!! High school AUs of Shakespeare plays and classic lit!!!!#10 things i hate about you #she’s the man #Clueless #Let’s throw lbd in there too!

areax

“ugh why is moby-dick so long”

ishmael is telling you a story about how all his friends died and how he was the sole survivor of the disaster, why wouldn't he want to delay getting to that point of the story as long as possible?

the odyssey

the length of the book parallels the long amounts of time that whalers were away from home with long periods of boredom punctuated few and far between by brief bouts of frenzied action

you don't like cetology? whalelore? kys

since when have you ever complained about a dick being long. ungrateful

the-golden-vanity

@artcorevelay

#Moby dick

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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rozieramati

lazy-toad

Moby Dick is great. It's like if an encyclopedia was a tragedy

#moby dick

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