𝕷𝖊𝖔.𝕸𝖆𝖑𝖊.

33. INFJ.Usa. I smoke meth. I dont need your money. I don't get paranoid and do wierd shit all over my neighborhood. I dont get drunk and puff up my chest to end nights with black eyes. I'm not a thug. I avoid them altogether. I avoid everyone I can. I dont complain much. Not even on social media. There's nothing more loathsome than needy people desperate for strangers' sympathy on the web. Never begged or schemed for money. Even online. Never took unemployment, even if i needed it. Never robbed for my fix. Ive rejected an offer to live pampered by a millionaire because she catfished me, she was ugly, and because its not what I want out of people. I'm not unemployed or homeless. If I added the amount I've splurged on everything all my life I'd probably own a tiny house by now, but then again, you probably rent as well. And if something can be blamed, fast food has been the harshest to my wallet. I shower daily. Sometimes skip a day or two. Especially when the party is at someone else's. I handle my shit as much as anyone else. I understand my environment much more than your average ivy league graduate godless fuck, and probably know more history. I have 2 meaningless degrees I can wipe my ass with. That's about as impressive as yours would be to me. That's not how I size up anyone I want around me. My IQ is 3 digits, and I fucking hate it. I swear sometimes I wonder if being born retarded would've been better. They always seem happy. I fucking detest political correctness. It's fake and motivated by an agenda. Yet, I try my best to coexist with others. Understand every angle before I accept a truth. I'd rather you despise me, and that you know where you stand with me than to pretend we're friends. I respect my elders. I was taught manners. I'm not even capable of bringing a kid into THIS world. At least not the way it is right now. I know i want to give another soul the opportunity to experience life. But I'm not the best that soul would deserve. Tacky as fuck, I know. So, if it's not too much to ask, id love a badass chick to watch porn and edge with. I can't believe we still live in a world where that is almost as pervy as motherfuckers who fuck kids. Shit, i can't believe we live in a world we deny evil shit happens to kids because the rapists are rich and a goddamn "expert" told us so. ARENT WE FUCKING GENIUS OR WHAT??? Are you beginning to understand my scathing complicated relationship with everything? I know how uncomfortable you are reading this. Apologies, I'm attempting something new. So I'll dial it down a bit. The only differences between me and your kids you stuff with Adderall is that I rather put money in a friends' pocket than a big pharma pricks who doesn't give a single fuck about us. I guess the point is, I've resisted the temptation to be a piece of shit at every opportunity because I didn't want to give the drug war more fuel. The war that ultimately has never been about ending drug use. We've lived long enough to know why. You can only live with your own conscience. I don't believe I would find the words needed to convince you that i were an example of a functioning addict if i was not one. If youre not even asking, why would I tell you? Because transparency begins somewhere, and further down the line, you're not getting caught off guard. It benefits me more than anyone. Because ultimately, time is something we don't get back. It's a beautiful thing to live with exactly what you deserve. I know what I deserve.