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Downloaded Lifesum app, made my life difficult by choosing Extreme Fat-Burning diet plan but desperate times call for desperate measures. Started right away, with lunch. Fended off temptation for kids' calamari and french fries. Gave my husband withering glares as he helped himself to the fried stuff. Resentment much?

Studied the case at the donut shop pathetically and walked away with only coffee. Really wanted that ham croissant though...

I re-heated baked ziti because I thought I was hungry, then I pretended I made it for A, who didn't want it so I ate it. Because I'm a fat asshole.

My dumb husband bought a package of Oreos and left them in the car for the kids, who each had one while I channeled Pema and stared my desire in the face. I had a whole internal conversation with myself about whether I really wanted the Oreo or the smell was making me think I wanted one. I allowed myself the space to let the moment pass. I should do that more often...

Girl Scout cookies + no self-control = 200+ lbs. FML

Reading a book on Ayurvedic cleanse and I want to believe that the author is genuine in her assertion that weight loss is just a happy side effect of the cleanse, and that it's more about mental clarity and overall good health. Skeptical that it's just another diet trap that I'll fall into and spend money on besides. All the herbs and spices---is it any different from any other MLM diet scheme just because she's not selling a product?

Ok. I did not have to have the cheesecake. Or the cookie. Shit. I've fallen into the virtuous trap, irresponsibly. Drinking a smoothie at breakfast then using that to justify a damned cookie and a piece of cake. It's not just mindfulness that matter but also plain old will. Also, the moderation rule does not apply when you're fat. It doesn't.