Slow Shifts In The Pitt @thepitt-incorrect - Tumblr Blog

*Abbot arriving at the Pitt with a tight gray t-shirt, army pants, shouting orders while he does CPR*

Robby: Damn, I wish I was gay. Men are so hot.

Dana, sighing: I can't do this anymore.

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Joy: a couple weeks ago i picked up this rock to keep in my pocket in case i needed to throw a rock at someone but i’ve actually grown quite fond of it and now i’m not sure i can let it go

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Whitaker, to Santos: You fight too much.

Whitaker: You swear too much.

Whitaker: You have questionable morals.

Whitaker: You’re everything I’ve ever wanted in a friend.

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Robby: I’d literally take a bullet for you.

Abbot: You’re suicidal, that means nothing.

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Javadi: I'm a bad bitch! I don't take shit from anyone! I'm not nice!

Javadi: Well I can't just leave this cart in the middle of the parking lot. I have to take it to the cart return. I'm not an animal. Those employees work hard.

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Robby: I like to swallow

Whitaker: I can be at yours in ten minutes

Robby: Sorry, typo. I meant wallow. In self-pity

Whitaker: exactly what I'm gonna be doing for the next 24 hours because of this conversation

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Santos: What doesn't kill me should run, because now I'm pissed.

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Whitaker: Computer, stop showing me beautiful women in my area. I want pathetic men in my radius.

Santos: Perhaps the answer is within yourself.

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Santos: I don't care what you say about this next shift, Robby, but I need Whitaker there.

Robby: Just because the two of you have some weird emotional attachment to each other doesn't mean you have priority on shift scheduling.

Santos: It's illegal to take my emotional support queer away from me.

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McKay: When you meet someone for the first time and it's new and exciting. You know that rush?

Javadi: No. No, see, when I first meet somebody it's mostly panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.

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Javadi: What are you drinking?

Santos: Vodka.

Javadi: Straight?

Santos: No, lesbian.

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Whitaker: Actually, the hottest thing a man can do is ask how you're feeling and care about the answer.

Princess: The hottest thing a man can do is send me five figures on Paypal and fuck off forever.

Santos: The hottest thing a man can do is transition into a woman.

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Robby: Stop being an ass.

Jack: You are what you eat, Robby.

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Whitaker, in the break room: This doesn't look like a good fruit salad. There's barely any fruit in there.

Santos: Bitch you are the fruit.

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Santos: Make no mistake. Not only am I party rocking, but I am also in the house tonight.

Whitaker: But are you shuffling?

Santos: Everyday.

Robby: What language are you two speaking?

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Whitaker: Stop saying "there are plenty of fish in the sea." I got my eye on one specific emotionally distant salmon with commitment issues.

Abbot: I'm personally after the white whale that took my leg.

Santos: I also want the whale that took Abbot's leg.

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Whitaker: What kind of coffee do you want?

Santos: Blonde flat white.

Whitaker: That would be my stripper name.

#the pitt #incorrect the pitt quotes #dennis whitaker #trinity santos #source: ?

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