Be in, be out, be in

Accommodate people who speak slowly/with a different cadence/tone of voice than you and your friend group might…a lot of autistic people imitate people around them so if you use a certain tone of voice (like how art students talk etc) or joke around a lot your friends might be able to keep up for a little bit but it can be draining…so cultivate a judgement free environment around you so your friends don’t feel like they have to take breaks to recharge

my max limit for being in a social environment is like 4 hours…so please don’t guilt your friends for leaving early! try to check in with them to see if they’re still comfortable in the environment you’re in especially if it’s a loud or social space

also on that note…check in with your friends before you extend the plans you made!!! if you made plans to see a show and now suddenly you’re going drinking with people you only kind of know…make sure your friends are ok with that. Give them the option to leave if they want to without judgment. no one wants to be boring and say no outright so checking in is so so important

if someone asks you to explain a joke or meme or whatever…do it!!!! it’s easy and free

A lot of autistic people are sensitive to touch etc. so try to check in with someone before you touch them or at least be mindful of someone’s nonverbal cues…this doesn’t just apply to autistic people this should be the norm for everyone tbh

it is in your self-interest to find a way to be very tender (jenny holzer)

incorporate tenderness into everyday language (gashii)

attention is the beginning of devotion (mary oliver)

consciously study how to be tender to each other until it becomes a habit (audre lorde)