So thanks to the ever so frickin amazing artwork of @angerydj I've been craving to write an au where The Cabal from Avengers Assemble find a baby and have to settle their differences with one another AND get used to being 'dads' I also wanted to do a thing where they're all associated with a different word meaning "male parental figure" Papa - Modok (it was the only one left, prolly gonna make this the baby's first word, directed only at him because he's gonna have a harder time getting used to putting aside his work for this "little crotch goblin") Pop - Red Skull (he's old) Father - Attuma (he didn't want to get fully attached because his daughter's kind of a... female dog) Padre - Hyperion (he thought it sounded cool) Dad - Dracula (daddy drac~) When the Avengers find out why they've been slower with crime and such they try to help out with the baby stuff but get immediately rejected with a tidal wave pointed at the tower, a hyper beam from God knows where that destroys an entire lab, a visit from vampires lead by Hyperion, and some fun Hydra leads that were all false and go absolutely no where. Also no, none of them will be in relationships with one another. But Dracula's wives (from Blood Feud for like 2 second grabbing at iron Man, it's an entire headcanon I don't wanna get into) might show up, Attuma's ex will definitely make an appearance to try to fight off the new girl only to see that the other parents are men, then she'll prolly just laugh at him for a solid 3 sentences. Red Skull, being the old man he is, also has a headcanon about him getting a cat and embracing being a grumpy old fart. Hyperion doesn't think anyone is worthy of 'loving' him and Modok left the dating game out of disappointment a while ago.
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