Yuey'tirea★

"Jakesully, I know this causes great turmoil inside of you, but we do not have the luxury of time. We must act fast." Tonowari finally shatters the silence, moving to stand beside Jake.

"I've been fighting so hard to hold them off... I didn't want it to come down to, you know, like before. What happened at the Hallelujah Mountains, it was a greater sorrow than the destruction of Hometree. So many Na'vi were killed, and yes, it was for the greater good, for our home; but they died because of me. I was the one who went to their families and pulled them away, and I was the one who had to go back, to tell them that their loved ones didn't make it. I spent weeks pulling bodies out of the woods; I was the one who identified every single one of them so they could have a proper burial. Because I was Olo'eyktan, it was my duty. But I'm not anymore; I sacrificed my title for the sake of my family and my people, in hopes that the RDA would give up, leave us alone. It seemed like all they wanted was me, and I thought if I disappeared, they'd back off. They got their side, we have our side, you know?"

Tonowari's ears twitch, and he sets his lips in a firm line. Leaders don't give up; they don't back down. They fight until their dying breath. Jake was a coward; he knows that the others frown at the thought of forfeiting the title, but he was doing what he thought was best.

And it didn't do shit.

"But the humans have betrayed what boundaries we have set. And they will continue to do so, until they are stopped. You know this, so why do you fight it?"

Because I'm fucking terrified of watching my family die. Because my sons will try to be out there with me, and I can't protect them all at once. That's what he wants to say, but instead, he says, "If I'm going to rally the clans again, then I'll need every fighter we've got. And I'll need more time. I can't just rush out like last time. This needs to be planned."

"You will have your warriors. And as far as time, I will do what I can to pacify the other clans, for now. The presence of the demonship has them on edge."

"No, I mean, the Outsiders, the ones that we saved, I want to train them to fight with us."

Finally, Tonowari was losing control over himself, and he huffs out an angry hiss of air. "Train them as warriors, in our ways? No. They are outsiders, and to give them the knowledge that has been passed down for generations by my people would be an insult to our culture. I will not allow this."

"Then we might as well give up now! Look, we've got their leader, well, her right-hand-man. Quaritch knows everything about that base, about their weaponry, their numbers, their tactics, everything. But he's not gonna help us just 'cause we ask, or even demand. Where I come from, we have a phrase; you gotta give a little to get a little. You know what that means? Compromise."

"Compromise? With the very men who took our children, held them under their weapons, and killed our Tulkun? Compromise?"

"Yes," Jake huffs, just as put out by the idea. He didn't want to do it, but it was a necessary evil. All of a sudden, he was feeling like his old self, back in Hell's Gate, living a double life. How did he get back where he started? "We show them that they're one of us, earn their trust, and then they'll help."

"Can you guarantee this? How do we know that it would not be a trick to meet their own goals? Make us blind to their plans so they can sneak away and betray us to the humans, hmm? This plan could fail or succeed both ways."

He had a good point. Jake still isn't sure that he can fully trust Quaritch. He wouldn't put it past him to pretend to be one of the people, only to turn everyone in at the last second. Quaritch always has his own agenda.

But then again, if the two of you are- he shudders at the thought- mated, then you would be able to see his deepest intentions. You would know if he was planning a coup... unless you were in on it too. But no, there was no way that you would betray the Na;vi to the RDA. You'd rather die.

Jake's gaze wanders to the opening of the tent where you had stormed out. You were right, of course. Right that they should stand up and fight, right to be angry, right to want justice. You may not have been around for the war before, but you were around to see the aftermath. Around to see how the humans have changed this world already, enough to know how much worse it will get if they are allowed to continue.

"It's our best chance of winning this thing, Tonowari. But I will only proceed with your blessing."

Tonowari stares hard, mulling it over, even though he isn't really left with much choice. Then, he holds out an open palm, and Jake grasps him at the elbow, above his widened forearm. Tonowari grips his arm tightly, pulling him closer. "I will allow this, but you will train them with our weapons, in our ways. I do not want to see any of those demon weapons in their hands that you took from the demon ship, understand?"

"Yes, Olo'eyktan."

Tonowari grunts, releasing his hand, dismissing him with a wave. Jake knew that this was the end of the conversation, and it was now his turn to leave. Now, all he had to do was tell Neytiri.

She'll be so fucking happy.

MILES QUARITCH

At first, he absolutely hated being babysat.

It was demeaning and humiliating to have a boy bossing him around, telling him when he could eat, sleep, and shit even.

But as the days progressed, he got more... acclimated? Used to it? Neteyam wasn't so bad, after the initial shock of it all wore off.

There was no denying this boy was Jake's kid. He saw it not only in his features, but in his attitude. He was exactly how he remembered Jake when he first landed on Pandora, fresh off the boat, unsullied by the wiles of the native women. Of course, that was old Quaritch's thinking. 

And as soon as you were up and moving on your own, his attitude improved significantly, and all of a sudden, things were looking up. He was happy to help build canoes, erect new marui's, and even fish. Although he was only allowed to use a net, he still enjoyed it. It was simple, easy. Monotonous. One could almost forget they were in the middle of a war, living like this.

He could see why Jake fled here.

But between the hard labor and long days, all of it was made bearable by catching even just a glimpse of you.

Every now and then, he'd catch your scent on the breeze, and he'd stop and inhale as deeply as he could, wishing he could have you in his arms again, like that night in the canopy. Before everything went to absolute shit. He'd stand and savor your scent, and he'd close his eyes and picture your body against his, your warmth, your softness; all the parts of you that you've been hiding since he basically ripped your heart out and betrayed you.

Again.

He's not sure how much you remember of the days from before- as in, the Human Days- but he remembers them painfully clear.

Specifically, he remembers that day in Hell's Gate when he tried to convince you to spy for him, when he asked for you to betray basically all of your friends and allies, just so he could get the higher ground on squashing the natives for pushing back on the developments of the mines.

He'll never forget that look on your face. The hurt. The betrayal. It was the same exact face you'd given him on the ship when he gave the green light to hunt for the Tulkun. When he locked you away for causing a scene. When he kidnapped the kids.

Damn, he fucked up a lot. And yet, somehow, you've forgiven him.

You let him kiss you, hold you, comfort you. Even when he was barely holding himself together, when the only thing that got him out of bed was the chance that he'd get to make things right again, he still spared the energy to make sure you were okay because half of everything that's happened to you was directly his fault. Well, maybe more than half.

But still, you were forgiving him, and slowly- painfully slowly- he was rebuilding what the two of you had. Because he was slowly realising that he really is nothing without you; you're his only redeemable quality.

Although he could sense that that might be about to go out the window as Jake comes storming up, glaring at the ground as he speaks, dismissing Neteyam for a few minutes. A full day has passed since you and Jake had your little spat, and you know for a fact you haven't spoken a word to him. You didn't even sleep in Jake's tent; you came crawling in with the other Recoms in their marui. You didn't sleep in his bed, of course. You just curled up by the door. So he knew you were serious about being angry at Jake.

"I got a proposal. Tonowari has informed me that he's tired of feeding and sheltering you guys, and that you now have a choice: join the clan or be outcast." Well, at least he didn't pussyfoot around when he had a point to make; that much Quaritch could appreciate.

"'Join the clan'...?" Lyle is the first one to speak up, rubbing his face against the crook of his elbow to wipe away the beads of sweat that were gathering on his forehead. He and the others were currently in the process of descaling the fish that were to be cooked for dinner tonight, and Quaritch glances up at him, smooth scaling stone in hand. He tosses it in the air, as if contemplating this news, but he already knew his decision, because he knew what your decision would be.

"As in, you complete iknimaya, become one of us, train as a warrior. Because if you don't, then we've got no use for you, and you'll need to leave."

The others look towards him, waiting to hear what his decision would be. Even though he's got no title now, they still treat him as their Colonel, a loyalty that even death couldn't shake. He clears his throat and then asks what choice you had made. 

"She's not gonna become a warrior. We'll find something else for her to do, but I'm not fixing to send her out into a fight." Jake finally looks Quaritch in the eye, his jaw twitching in anger. "She's a civilian."

"Does she know that yet?"

"She will, eventually." Oh, you're not gonna like that. Not in the slightest. Quaritch can already hear your furious tirade when you discover that Jake is planning on keeping you sidelined. You were already chomping at the bit to make a stand, to Do Your Part. No way in hell are you going to let Jake tell you otherwise. Maybe it will be fun to watch this play out. How long does Jake think he can keep you under his thumb?

A sly smile spreads across Quaritch's lips as he jerks his head in a nod. "Alright then. We'll do it. When do we start?"

"Now."

Jake spins on his heel, stomping in the direction of Tonowari's marui, where most meetings are held with the Olo'eyktan. Through the doorway, he spots several warriors already standing inside, one of them being Tonowari's son. Quaritch has seen this kid around the village. Every time they meet eyes, the boy always makes a taunting face, hissing and flicking his tongue, like an insult. And now he's gotta take orders from this punk?

Great.

"Outcasts, please show your respect to these warriors, as they will be teaching you our ways," Tonowari states as they push through into the tent, and Jake elbows him in the side, showing him how to bow his head. Quaritch knows the motion, and he touches his fingers to his forehead in the gesture of respect, saying, I see you. 

The son grins, scoffing under his breath as he rolls his eyes, earning a chuckle from his gang. "This will be fun," he says with a laugh.

Old Quaritch is probably rolling in his grave. Here he is, at the hands of a bunch of fucking kids.

Oo-rah.

YOU

The rest of that week, you avoid Jake like the plague.

Maybe it was childish, but he'd hurt your feelings, and you wanted him to feel the sting.

Especially after Lo'ak came running to tell you that Jake was deliberately keeping you out of training with the others because he feels you aren't ready, and that Quaritch and the other Recoms are actively learning the ways of the Metkayina.

The very thought makes you want to claw his eyes out.

The two of you had fought in the past; it wasn't anything new. One minute, he could be comforting you, and in the next, he could be calling you stupid. It had always been that way, and a small part of you was glad to see that death and fifteen years hadn't changed that about him. But it also made you realize all the more that he saw you as a child. Not his sister, one year younger than him, but a child. Maybe even his own.

Since he felt your place was with the children, you followed Lo'ak, Kiri, Tuk, and Tsireya around as if you were one of them. 

Tsireya taught you how to swim. Not that you didn't already know how, but she taught you the breathing techniques of the Metkayina, and how to control yourself so you wouldn't panic under the water- now that was harder to learn than holding your breath. 

Although your body was that of a Na'vi, your brain was still hardwired as a human, and it was hard to fight past the urge to struggle to the surface to breathe after the first minute. On average, a human without any training can hold their breath from one minute to maybe three. Expert divers have been recorded to go so long as eight minutes. But since the Na'vi are designed to handle higher levels of CO2 in their bloodstream from their native atmosphere, they can also metabolize it better and hold their breath for longer. Their greater lung capacity helps, which in turn makes it so that a Na'vi's natural ability to hold their breath can range from ten to fifteen minutes, untrained. Tsireya, on the other hand, seems to be able to breathe under the water. She still manages to swim circles around the kids, even though they've been doing this longer than you have, and you embarrassingly still struggle to stay down for ten minutes.

Lo'ak has been teaching you knife techniques while you build strength in your arms, but said that when he feels you're ready, he'll teach you the bow and arrow. Even though the Metkayina use spearguns over bows and arrows, you want to learn the ways of the Omatikaya, because they were the People Jake's family belonged to.

Kiri was all too happy to share with you her knowledge of the local flora and their healing capabilities. Although she was also learning from Tsireya about the herbs of the Metkayina, she was eager to pass the knowledge along.

Neteyam was busy herding the Recoms during their training with the Metkayina warriors, although even he would come by every now and then to drop in his two-cents when Lo'ak was showing you some moves. Of course, he hadn't finished his iknimaya yet, since they were abruptly moved from home; he was just as eager to learn as you were. And somehow Jake never noticed where his sons ran off to during the day when they weren't doing their assigned chores, and he never questioned the strange bruises on your arms when you'd go crawling onto your floor mat for bed.

Even though you still aren't on speaking terms, you can't exactly blame him. He's got a lot on his plate.

With the threat of Bukowski's return looming over the heads of the Metkayina, and the frequent return of the demon ship, Jake and Tonowari have been going back and forth about what to do. Like right now, they're back in Tonowari's tent, nearing an almost nuclear argument about the next steps that should be taken. 

Tonowari's argument is always, "This is a problem that the Great Toruk could fix. If you would reclaim your mount, we could meet these aliens head-on, and destroy them. Make them never return." He wanted to attack the demonships again, not so much their city fortress.

"No! We did that already! Fifteen years ago, we defeated them, and yet they just came right back!" Jake always hisses, pinning his ears and pursing his lips as he paces the room. "I'm not ridin' Toruk again. You don't... It's not just win the battle and be done, when Toruk is involved. The beast craves blood, and when he's fighting, he wants to consume everything and everyone. There can only be one, in his mind. No room for anything else." Meaning, Toruk wants them all gone. Not just back to Earth, but gone.

They would go back and forth like this for a while, before they both got too riled up and frustrated and gave up. Not that you were allowed to be present for such meetings, but the kids tend to drag you into their eavesdropping, and since it kind of involves the safety of an entire people, you don't want to be in the dark about it.

You agree with Tonowari.

Hell, you agree with Toruk.

They should all be killed. They don't even deserve the honor of returning. If it were up to you, you'd be all too happy to see them burn. There's not a single good one among them.

"Again!" Lo'ak barks, ordering you to repeat the sequence of moves he'd taught you earlier. The blade feels heavy and foreign in your hand, made of a polished stone blade instead of the lightweight metal that was standard for RDA. You pant softly, wiping the beads of sweat off your forehead as you resume your stance.

With the blade in hand, you slash up, then downswing to the right, then across to the left, and then up to the right once more, lunging forward as you do. Lo'ak said that you need to work with your feet, which you've never been known for being very swift, but claims that these motions will help you learn to find your balance when you're in constant motion. And muscle memory with a knife will come in handy if you're ever in a fight. Which you fully plan on doing, Jake be damned.

You and Lo'ak were as far from the village as the small island would allow, seeking privacy and cover. Lo'ak knew that his father would put a stop to this if he ever saw him training you how to fight, and you didn't want anyone seeing just how bad at it you are. You'd had a few weeks to train with Quaritch back in Bridgehead, but he never actually showed you how to use a weapon; it was only ever hand-to-hand. And even still, you were more distracted by the feel of his body on top of yours to really learn much of anything.

Despite Lo'ak being the same height as you, and several years younger, he had no problem flinging you over his back and to the ground. He showed no mercy, surgery and all, and a part of you feels like training you was a way to get out some of his frustrations with Jake.

He barks at you to do the motions again, but with your non-dominant hand, and you obey, switching the knife over and repeating the moves. You do this over and over again, until your muscles burn. 

"That's enough of that for now. We should probably get back, before someone notices," Lo'ak huffs, holding out his hand. You place the knife in his open palm, and as he grips the hilt, he holds his closed fist out for you to bump. 

"I think we should swim back. The water sounds like heaven right now, and also, I am filthy." Again, Lo'ak put you on the ground multiple times, and you definitely looked as if you'd been rolling in the dirt. That would raise some questions that you didn't plan on answering, and he nods his agreement.

When you finally make it back to the village, Tuk comes running to find you. "Hurry, Dad is meeting with Tonowari again, and this time, they've got the Colonel with them!" She huffs breathlessly, grabbing your hand, despite the water that was dripping down your skin. She yanks on your arm, tugging you along until you are trotting beside her. It doesn't even hurt your scar to do so anymore.

She drops into a crouch as she nears the edges of the tent, and you follow suit, with Lo'ak on your tail. You creep up to the seam along the back of the Marui, peeking through until you can find the three of them gathered together. 

You are immediately hit with a wave of jealousy as Quaritch stands there, talking with the others like he belongs. And Jake is listening.

Of course.

He'll take a Marine seriously, but he'd never dare to listen to his sister.

"No matter what, it wouldn't be wise to let this go ignored. We need to spread the word about what the RDA are planning." The rumble of Quaritch's voice floats to your ears.

Tonowari nods his agreement. "It is time the clans come together."

"Let's just start with the Omatikaya," Jake huffs, crossing his arms over his chest, setting his brows into a firm frown. His tail swishes angrily around his legs. "I can catch Tarsem up on what's been happening out here, and he can tell me if he's noticed anything new about Bridghead."

"I'm sure Ardmore has gotten more aggressive about her colonization initiative. It's the whole reason they're here. Something will be going on, we just need to find out what."

"Is their city of stone not enough?"

"No. Nothing is ever enough for her. She won't stop till she has it all. The humans won't stop until they have it all," Quaritch growls, and Jake scoffs.

"What happened after Hell's Gate... it'll be nothing compared to this war we're fixing to start."

"Jakesully," Tonowari steps forward, clasping his hand around Jake's shoulder, "it is they who started this fight. Perhaps at once point, there was a chance for peace. But not now."

"So, how do we get there?" Quaritch's ears twich, and his nostrils flare, and your heart stutters in your chest as his eyes flick in your direction, locking in on you instantly. How the hell did he know you're here?

"Norm's transmission said it was urgent, and I told him to only ever reach out if it were an emergency. If what you're saying is true, and what they're bringing in is a precurser to a full blown invasion... then we have to act now." Jake's veins were throbbing along his neck and temple, a telltale sign that he was at his Shit Storm Limit.

This led to more arguments, back and forth, each one ping-ponging off the other of what to do.

Miles was trying to convince Jake that they should at least return to High Camp to properly warn the Omatikaya about Bridgehead, and update them on the Bukowski situation and whatever this transmission was about. In turn, Jake would get mad, because the whole reason they left High Camp was to get away from Quaritch. And he sounds a little too eager to get there. Of course, Quaritch swears that isn't the case anymore, he couldn't care less about where it's at, so long as it's still safe and hidden from the humans.

The only problem with leaving is that Ronal refuses to let you and the other Recoms be left behind, and since both Lyle's and Z's ikran were killed in the Battle at Three Brother's Rock, and you don't have one at all, there weren't enough mounts to carry the entire group.

Neytiri refused to leave the kids, and Jake said he'd never let you out of his sight again, and you said you won't be going anywhere without Miles- so here you all are, days later, watching as your last solution comes flying in.

Big, beautiful, breathtaking creatures drift over the ocean, and the Metkayina flood to the shore, waving and cheering as the creatures drop down massive ropes with anchors tied to them, weighing the beasts down until they were sure they wouldn't be going anywhere. A long time ago, you had read an article about the medusoids; after all, anyone who doesn't see a ginormous flying jellyfish and not stop to figure what the hell that's all about would have to be insane. 

From what you can recall, the massive membranous sack is filled with helium gas, allowing it to float, although the only control it has over itself is the big sail-like fins at its sides, allowing it to turn and steer. But it cannot propel, it just drifts, floating over oceans mostly, using its long tentacles to immobilize and catch prey at the surface of the waters, before dragging them to its mouth.

But these Na'vi, the Tlalim, as you've learned, have harnessed these creatures and turned them into a sort of primitive blimp, with a different kind of creature at the bow, tied in place by harnesses and ropes, and ridden by a Na'vi who is connected by their kurus to navigate. Below the Medusoid is a massive saddle, the equivalent of a caravan from the old days, filled to the brim with goods from all over the moon, with Na'vi jumping along the rails, waiting to hit the sand.

It's ingenious.

You didn't realize you were gawking until Lyle comes strutting to your side, shielding his eyes against the harsh sunlight as he whistles lowly. "You know, I thought this place couldn't hold any more surprises, but damn, have I been proven wrong!"

"If you think you'll ever not be surprised, you're more stupid than I took you for. Take all your expectations and experience, and throw it out the window. Nothing can prepare you for what you will see out here," you laugh, punching his shoulder lightly.

You watch as who you assume to be the leader steps down a gangplank, and he and Tonowari grasp for arms, greeting each other warmly. His voice is raspy and warm, and his lips pull back into a wide smile. "It is good to see you again, old friend."

"I hope your travels have been well and fruitful," Tonowari laughs in response, and they drop hands.

"Not as well as I'd like," the man sighs, placing his hands on his hips. His head is mostly shaved, aside from an elaborate braid that twists around his head. The rest of his kuru, instead of dangling down the length of his back, is wound around his neck and hidden behind a high, stiff collar. He wears a shawl, which sits half-open, exposing the rest of his woven clothes, which look to be from various different origins. "The Mangkwan have been growing more aggressive."

Mangkwan? Who are they?

"Peylak, these are my comrades," Tonowari gestures to Jake and Neytiri, who were standing stoicly behind him. "And I think we have answers to both of our problems."

The rest of the clan push past, carrying baskets, nets, and crates of all sizes, overflowing with goods for trading and selling. Beads, blades, woven linens, cloths, food, tools; anything and everything you could think of, and all of them vastly different from each other, obviously, from all over the world.

The leaders walk away, disappearing with Jake and Neytiri back to the marui, and as tempted as you are to follow and listen in, you decide that you want to shop.

After all, you are a girl at heart.

You catch Lo'ak and Tsireya picking their way through the crowd, hand-in-hand, and you smile softly, watching them as she begins to pick through the goods before they even have a chance to set up.

"So, you think they'll let us go with them?" Lyle quirks his brow. You had almost forgotten he was standing beside you. He looks better now that his hair is starting to grow out, making him look more Na'vi than Recom. You shrug, gaping wordlessly.

"I don't know what we'll do if they say no."

You distract yourself with the traders, browsing through the goods and wares, asking what would be an appropriate trade. These people have no currency; they purchase things based on value and significance, not from anything monetary, and since you have pretty much nothing to your name, it was hard to haggle.

You wound up literally selling the clothes off your back in order to purchase a new top, this one more solid than your previous beaded top. The woman who sold it to you said it was from the Olangi clan, which explained the stitching across the piece. It was a solid square of fabric, with Pa'li sewn in one long line, as if the horses were marching together, nose to tail. The textile was made of multiple colors, mostly red and brown, and a solid braided string ran from corner to corner, which wrapped around the back of your neck. Wooden beads dangle like tassels from the bottom, weighing it down enough so it hangs off your body, jangling softly as you move.

You slide it on, pulling your kuru through the string, fluffing out your hair. The Na'vi don't have mirrors, so you do your best to look yourself over. You turn towards Lyle, who was still trailing behind. Z-Dog was busy talking to a few of the Tlalim women- she had them giggling over something- so you chose to ask Lyle for his opinion. "How does it look?"

"Uh," the tips of his ears turn a shade of pink, and he shifts on his feet. "Like... a top, I guess?"

You scoff, passing your old top over to the woman, and she thanks you warmly, although you don't miss the way her eyes seem to linger on your hands. Right.

Alien.

You make sure your necklace is still secure around your neck before you push away, moving on down the line, running your fingertips over pretty much anything you can get your hands on.

That is, until the air shifts around you, becoming almost electric as Quaritch glides in close. You can hear him dismiss Lyle. So that's why he was following you around. Like a guard dog.

"Sorry, I knew you would've objected to it if you knew why he was sticking around, but I needed to get a read on these people before I felt comfortable letting you wander alone."

"There's nothing to worry about. These are good people. Otherwise, Tonowari would not welcome them as he has."

He hums, disbelieving. Your skin tingles at his nearness, and you finally turn to face him, steering yourselves behind a wooden pillar between tents. The chaotic noise of the crowd drowns out your voices, so you have to lean in close to hear him properly.

"What was going on in Tonowari's tent? Jake won't tell me anything, and the kids don't know either. I hate being kept out of the loop."

"I knew you were eavesdropping," Quaritch chuckles, shaking his head. His fangs poke past his bottom lip as he grins. "I can smell you anywhere."

Your cheeks burn. "That's- that's beside the point, not what I was asking about. Focus. What transmission?"

Quaritch sighs, his gaze sweeping the area, before turning his attention back to you. "Apparently, your old buddy Norm Spellman has reached out to Jake over a secure line about concerning new shipments to Bridghead. Less weapons, more building supplies. He's calling Jake back to look over some of the things they salvaged from the wreckage of their last raid. He wouldn't say anything else, in case the line was bugged. And Tonowari says this would be the perfect opportunity to start going to the other clans to rally them and make a plan of attack."

"And why were you in there?"

At this, he shifts on his feet. 

"Miles?"

His eyes snap back to yours, and his ears twitch. You hadn't called him by his first name since, well, his betrayal on the ship. Your delirious near-death ramblings don't count.

"Jake let it slip that he needs my knowledge of Bridghead to stage a proper assault. I made it clear that attacking them directly would be a major mistake. Tonowari doesn't understand why, and Jake says it is our best bet at getting the upper hand."

Bridgehead is huge. From what you can recall, it's somewhere near six miles wide, full of thousands upon thousands of angry mercenaries, just waiting for the excuse to pull the trigger. Since SciOps was shut down, SecOps is in full control of all of Pandora's on-world operations. And with Ardmore at the helm, you know she will ruthlessly stop at nothing to win. She doesn't care about ethics or bad press. Low quotas mean nothing to her. It's not like Hell's Gate. Not like when Parker Selfridge was in charge. At least he made a vague attempt to establish good relations with the Na'vi before he started tearing everything up.

But Ardmore made it clear to you that she is above all of that.

"Attacking Bridgehead would be like walking into a trap. There's no way to do it, right?"

"Not easily. Their only weak point is the ocean-facing gates. There is a marine killzone, but an aerial assault would be their only chance at maybe breaching the city. But I wouldn't push it. What threw me off was that he wasn't asking for details. He didn't ask about weapons or supplies, or maps or anything. He pretty much just asked for my opinion on Bridghead's security, and what I would do if I were planning a full-scale assault. It was... strange."

"Hmm," you hum, looking down. Your fingers play with the fabric of your new top thoughtfully. "That doesn't sound like Jake. He's not a conversationalist."

"My thoughts exactly. And then giving us the chance to become warriors with the clan, to be accepted, if we meet all of their challenges? Something is up."

The thought makes your blood boil. What the hell is Jake playing at? One minute, he's spewing hate about the Recoms, and in the next, he's getting all buddy-buddy with them?

"This is giving me a headache. I don't want to think about Jake anymore, or the war. I just want to enjoy this," you gesture towards the crowd, "for a bit. Pretend I'm just a regular Na'vi, doing regular Na'vi things. Like haggling over some very pretty polished stones."

You push against his chest enthusiastically, stomping towards the man who was holding out handfuls of stones, showing them off to every wandering eye. Your ears catch the sound of Quaritch's soft laugh as he follows after you, watching from a distance as you haggle with the handful of shells of the pouch attached to your waist.

Reluctantly, the wind traders agree to give you and the others safe passage, with the promise that those with ikran will act as guards. Apparently, the Mangkwan are an aggressive clan of raiders and are a general nuisance for the traders. You've never heard of them before, but it isn't unknown for there to be hostile clans. Yes, the Na'vi aren't nearly as aggressive as the humans, but they do still have clan disputes from time to time.

Quaritch is one of the riders who will stand guard, although Jake still doesn't trust Miles with any weapons. 

When Miles tries to argue, Jake cuts him off with a hiss. "A warrior does not lose his title just because he loses his weapon; he becomes the weapon."

When Jake came back from serving overseas with the Marines, he was a changed man. Something in him broke when he came home, and he was never the same after that. But now, seeing him fifteen years older, father of four, and former Olo'eyktan, you can see that that was nothing compared to now. He was wisened, bitter, and cranky.

Old man.

The windtraders do not linger long. Peylak claims that they have many more villages to trade with, and by the end of the day, they've already got their things packed and are ready to set sail once more.

Jake urges the kids to gather their things quickly, and as you're rolling up your sleeping mat, you can hear the murmur of his voice as he argues with Neytiri. You know it's about you. It's always about you.

From what you've gathered so far, she's upset that Jake seems to care about your well-being more than that of his own children, because all he seems to talk and fret about is you. Thankfully, the children don't feel the same resentment. In fact, Lo'ak has told you multiple times that he's glad you're around, because now Jake isn't riding his ass about every little thing.

"It's like he would wait for me to mess up, just so he could yell at me, no matter how hard I tried to impress him," Lo'ak had told you once, between training sessions. "Ever since the humans returned, he changed. Like he's not my dad anymore. He's a, what's the human word?"

"Drill sergeant?"

"Yes. Asshole," Lo'ak also likes to curse. A lot. Especially in reference to his father.

But deep down, you know all he wants is Jake's approval.

Just like Jake did with your father, when he was a kid.

Jake used to fight so hard to make your dad proud, to pull him out of his drunken stupor by following in his footsteps, only better. He was the tough sibling, the strong one. The leader. He only joined the Marines because it was what your dad served in when he was young. You tried to convince Jake not to do it, because that's why your father was the way he was, but he insisted that he would be better.

Now look at him.

It's like watching your life on an uncanny loop.

Jake, trying to make Lo'ak and Neteyam tougher by being harsh, just like your dad did to him and Tommy. "I'll turn these boys into men, but you can't keep kissing their asses, LeeAnne!" Your dad would always scream at your mother after dishing out some punishment on the boys.

You'd heard Jake tell them something similar. "You gotta be tough. We can't afford a weak link right now. Or else our whole chain will crumble."

And then Neytiri would always swoop in to soothe the burn of his words when he would leave, all the while glaring at you.

"Mom says that Dad's moodiness got worse when you showed up," Kiri had told you.

And it seems like all they do is bicker.

That's why you try to disappear with the kids every chance you get. 

The Metkaina gather at the shore once again, waving and cheering as the Tlalim file back into their gondolas, baskets overflowing with new things to trade and pass on. The children cling to the ropes as they lean over the railing, waving in return. Tuk's enthusiasm is infectious, and you try to hide your smile as she waves to the small group of friends gathered below. Lo'ak specifically moves down the length of the vessel until he spots Tsireya, and you bump him playfully as his ears turn pink, saying his goodbyes. Tsireya's eyes are sparkling, even from this distance, and she continues to wave until the vessels start to rise.

It is an incredible thing to watch. You bend over the rails to see ports open along the hull, and gallons of water pour out, allowing the medusoid to lighten and return to the sky. Peylak calls out the orders as the Na'vi work in perfect unison, almost like a dance. They scramble to untie the rigging, allowing the sail-fins to fan out and catch the wind current, and the Na'vi on the wingray's back yips, commanding the beast to fly forward. The thick ropes groan in protest as the wind causes the gondola to shift, and the air grows colder as it rises hundreds of feet above the open waters. From here, all you can see is turquoise ocean, until is disapears on the horizon. Alpha Centauri haunts the sky, not nearly as bright with the glare of the full sun, but distinguishable enough you can still make out her giant gas swirls.

The windray's wings make a strange flapping sound as it flutters to the side, steering the medusoid away from the islands, slow but steady. You inhale deeply, breathing in the salty breeze one last time, knowing that soon, you'll be back over the continents. You tilt your head back, allowing the sun to warm your skin as the air cools with your rising height.

"It's been a while since I've seen that smile," Miles says to your left, and you jump softly.

"Well, there's not been a lot to smile about."

He clears his throat and changes the subject.

"So, after all this time, I'm finally going to get to see High Camp?" Miles attempts a joke, the corner of his mouth twitching into a smirk, but it misses the mark.

You deadpan, flattening your ears with a glare. "Really?"

He falters, and then reaches out to brush your elbow with his fingers. You pull away, turning your back to retreat into the vessel as the windtraders mill about. Just because you've forgiven him doesn't mean you've forgotten all the things he did to try to find High Camp, to find Jake, even though at the time, you had no idea that was the goal.

"Really, Colonel? Come on, use your brain. Don't joke about that," you hear, and you're pretty sure it was Z-dog, because she comes sneaking up behind you after you find a comfortable, out-of-the-way spot to sit. She drops down beside you as you pull a necklace from the bag Tsireya had gifted you to hold your few belongings.

She doesn't say anything as she pulls out her own bag, brandishing a small dagger from the sheath at her waist. She begins to weave waxy cord around the hilt, which was the final touch to the blade before it would be finished. She must have been making it in secret, because the Recoms aren't supposed to have any weapons.

Something tells you it was Lo'ak.

After a heavy moment of silence passes between the two of you, you break it, looking over at her with a sigh.

"What's your real name?"

"Beg pardon?"

"You know, your real name. I only know your last name, and everyone else just calls you Z-Dog, so what's your real name? I know Lyle, Miles...?"

Zdinarsik sighs heavily, and her hands fall still as she stares into the distance, gathering her words.

"My dad was a real asshole. Abusive. You know, every typical Marine's sob-story. Bad home life, daddy issues, yada yada," she rambles, resuming her work on the hilt. "Anyways, he always wanted a son. Said he needed a strong boy to carry his legacy. His name."

You listen patiently, carefully weaving and knotting the threads in your hands as you work on your bracelet. "Well, Mom got pregnant with me, and they couldn't afford any of the prenatal care, so she shows up at the hospital the day I'm coming out, and when the doc passes me over to my dad, he said 'this wasn't what he wanted'. Got real mad, threw a huge fit, almost got kicked out of the room. Fast forward to my mom asking me where she signs the papers for my name, and Doc says, 'Oh, your husband took care of that already'."

She levels you with a hard look.

"He claims it was an honest mistake, that he was drunk. Which he always was; that part wasn't a lie. But signed my name as Emilio. Mom wanted to name me Emilie, after her mother. Mom tried to have it fixed, but the doc had already sent the paperwork to the Social Security office, so there was nothing to be done about it. Mom always called me Em, or Emmie, but Dad insisted on Emilio."

She scoffs and shakes her head. "I did everything I could to try to make him proud, you know? Like I learned how to hunt, learned how to shoot, always settled my own fights. Got bullied for being butch, which there's no shame in that. The world had bigger problems for me than worrying about what kids thought. But nothing I did was ever good enough... and mom just let him do it. It was always excuse after excuse with her. She cared more about that asshole than she ever did me, because I didn't make him happy, so she couldn't love me. 'Cause that would make him unhappy."

You're caught off guard with her honesty, but it's like the floodgates have opened, and you can see that she's never talked about this out loud. She'd been holding it in all these years, and now she can't stop herself. 

"Then she got pregnant again, and had a son. He died in the hospital; he was only a few days old. Something about his lungs not being fully developed. They kicked me out not long after, 'cause I was causing too much trouble. Dad said the stress was too much for my mom; that's what caused her body to not grow my brother right, or some made-up shit like that. Acting out was the only way I could get either one of them to even talk to me, but after that, I said I never wanted to hear from them again. So I lived on the streets for a while, fought like hell to stay in school, and as soon as I graduated, I joined the Marines. My whole life, I was always trying to prove myself to my father, so I thought, hell, I'm gonna prove to myself that I'm worth somethin'. So I scratched off my name, made sure that the name Emilio was nowhere to be found, and I took my mother's maiden name, so my father's 'legacy' would die with him."

"Then what happened?"

"He died. Liver shit out finally, and mom realized what she'd done, tried to get me to come back, but I was already boarding the flight for Pandora. Never looked back, since."

She goes quiet, but after a few breaths, she continues. "All those years, I thought I was doing something good, you know, fighting for a cause? Turns out, I was the asshole. Made me feel like my dad. The more I think about it, when I was human, I took joy in watching the Na'vi suffer. It made me feel strong. Then, after we caught those kids in the jungle, it didn't make me feel good. I felt like shit. Seein' how scared Tuk got... I recognized that look in her eyes, cause I saw it in the mirror when my dad would come storming into my room lookin' to let his anger out on me 'cause of something I didn't even do."

"Oppression feels different when you're on the other side of the fence, huh?"

"Psh," she laughs humorlessly, stuffing her blade back into the sheath, finished fiddling with it for now. "Anyways, so yeah. I'm Zdinarsik. Nothing more, nothing less. But I like that you call me Z. It sounds... kinder."

"Now isn't really the time to be kind though. We're still fighting for our lives out here," you give her a sideways glance, adding a bead to the threads that Kiri had helped you carve, as well as the small polished stones you had gotten from one of the traders.

"I know. I'm just glad to finally be doing something I can actually be proud of."

The silence returns, and after a while, you clear your throat and offer her a smile. "Thank you for telling me that, Z. I know it probably was hard."

"Kind of, but also... not. Like, I can look back on it, but it's like someone's put glasses over me, you know? Seeing it all different?"

"That's because they're technically not your memories. You're not that woman anymore."

"I'm starting to get that now," an easy chuckle escapes her lips. "I've always been told who I need to be. I'm struggling doing it myself, now."

"I guess that's where you and I are different. I've always been told who not to be."

And all this time, you've been preaching at the Recoms about how they're not the same person as they were when they were human, and it leaves you to wonder... how have you changed?

That evening, as the sun sets and night consumes the world, the Tlalim build fires in special chambers in the gondolas, allowing warmth and soft orange light to flood the chambers. All around, the People sing and dance, playing instruments you don't recognize. Each one hails from a different clan, and it's interesting to see the way the Tlalim perfectly blend elements from each Clan, combining them into one Clan, all their own.

Kiri and Tuk were dancing around one of the fires, and a great gust of wind blows against you as Miles, Lo'ak, and Neteyam land their ikran on the open deck, before ducking into the chamber. The brothers join their sisters, taking up a plate of food that's offered to them, while you carry your own to Miles.

You offer him a truce in the shape of food and a smile.

"I'm sorry."

"Me too."

"Think we'll ever get over it?"

"What I did... it's not really something you just get past, don'tcha think?"

He's right. And every time you think you can finally let it all go, something comes up to remind you that, no, it's not okay. He'll be paying for those mistakes for the rest of his life. The Na'vi will make sure of that.

You shake your head to pull yourself from your thoughts, reaching into the small pouch at your waist so you could pass him the gift you had made him. "I made this for you. Thought you needed some more decorations to make you look more like the Na'vi. Before they tossed your knife, I cut the paracord off of it and used the threads to make the detail, and the beads are made from driftwood and seashells."

You join him on the floor, crossing your legs and curling your tail around yourself as you pass him the bracelet. It's a thick bangle, with one braided cord on top and one on bottom, and long thin wooden beads in between, dispersed by polished bits of seashell and stone in an alternating pattern. The pure white threads from the paracord glint in the light, twisting and curving around the thin leather strips you'd woven them with. Kiri showed you how to do it, and the first thing that came to mind as you started it was him, to repay him for the necklace.

"You just had to one-up me, didn't you?" He attempts another joke, and you scoff. "So, what's it mean?"

"What?"

"Neteyam said jewelry usually tells a story. So, what's the story for this one?"

"Oh, I... didn't think about that. I just- made it." You look down at your hands, and then your own necklace. "Wait, then what does this one mean?"

"The big shell in the center is you. The shells to the right is your family: Jake, Neytiri, and one for each of the kids. And then the shells to the left is us; me, which is why I'm bigger, then Z-dog, then Lyle. So you can keep us all close to your heart."

You feel like an idiot. What you thought was his blindness to good design was actually a choice, because each piece was symbolic. Stupid.

"Wow, okay then. Give it back, I can fix it, give it a story," you reach for the bracelet, but he snatches it away, holding it just out of reach. You claw at his wrist, but he pushes you back. You can't help but laugh. 

"No, it's mine now. You can't take it back," he glares, although his grin gives it away. His tail swishes mischievously around on the floor; the bristly hairs at the end tickle your legs.

"That's what I thought. Enjoy it."

He stares down at it wordlessly, running the pad of his thumb over the cords, studying it. Finally, he looks up at you, his expression... soft. Vulnerable. "Thank you. I never thought you'd- well, I didn't let myself hope that we would- I... don't know what to say." You find it sweet when he struggles to put his words together.

"Neither do I," you huff, tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear. Your braids were in need of tending, getting loosened and frayed by the strong winds in the medusoid.

Instead, the two of you sit in companionable silence after you help him tie it onto his arm. You run your fingers over the beads, and then smile, looking away to laugh and clap along as the song switches to one that tells a story, and the dancers illustrate the tale with their bodies.

When it was over, Kiri leaps to her feet, jumping over to where you were sitting to snatch you by your wrist, dragging you up with her, forcing you to dance beside her as the music swells.

You don't resist, twirling and leaping alongside her, waving your arms and banging a tambourine on your hip as one of the Tlalim dancers passes it to you, losing yourself to the moment. Miles' eyes never leave you.

The next morning, you wake up next to Miles, his arm draped lazily over your waist as the two of you cuddle in a hammock at the lowest deck of the gondolas, just above the water reservoirs. You sit up carefully, but he's already awake, watching you.

"Mornin'," his voice cracks, still thick from sleep, but he manages to offer you a grin.

"Morning. You good?" You question over your shoulder as you rise to your feet and stretch, and he does the same, yawning loudly.

"You know, I've slept on pretty much every kind of surface you can imagine, and that damn hammock is by far the worst."

You gape, slapping his arm playfully. "Are you kidding me? Worse than the cave?"

"Oh yeah. Most definitely." You can't tell if he's teasing you or being serious, so you ignore him, shaking your head incredulously. 

As you move to the higher decks in search of breakfast, Jake hunts you down, his eyes zeroing in on Miles. Your ears twitch as you glance between them as the air changes.

"What's going on?"

"I caught a scent on the wind. We tried changing course, but it didn't do much good. Pretty sure we got trouble coming." But Jake isn't talking to you.

He's talking to Miles. Miles the warrior, Miles the fighter. The one who could actually be of use in a fight.

Unlike you.

Finally, Jake looks your way, giving your arm a quick squeeze and a peck to your forehead, as if forgetting that you had been ignoring him for the past week. "Go find the kids, stick with them."

"Is it to keep them safe, or the other way around? I don't need a pack of babysitters, you know!" You call after him, and he offers you a glare before yipping for his mount, which clings to the side of the saddle as he climbs on.

But not before you watch him pass a rifle to Miles.

Shit.

As much as she hated to admit, Rakxe was in love with Quaritch.

She hated the man's guts at first...but she grew attached...and fell in love...

It didn't help that the man liked her back.

He took a lot of firsts from her.

The worst part was the RDA. No one liked her. She was Na'vi, a savage, the enemy.

The only kept her around because Quaritch wanted her around.

They tried to treat her with respect, take care of her for the colonel. But Rakxe saw the disgust, the disdain, the fear, the hate. She saw it all.

It made her sad.

Usually, she'd run to Quaritch for comfort, but he was gone. Decided to hike all the way out to the Mangkwan village. And he brought Lyle too.

She was alone.

This should be good. She should be trying to escape. She hasn't been home in so long.

But she stays. She stays in the little enclosed room with the weird beds and the window to the metal outside.

She cries.

She shouldn't cry. She shouldn't miss this man. Quaritch was horrible. He destroyed the land, burned the villages, killed the people, just so the sky demons could live here. He was in control of all of it.

Yet she still wanted to be held by him.

He did have a heart. It was selective in it's love and empathy, Rakxe supposes, but it's there, and he showed it to her.

This was all so stupid.

He was so much older than her anyways. He's got the memories of a dead man, the voice of an old man, but the body of someone closer to her age.

It was a perfect blend in her opinion. The sweet drawl and stupid teasing of an old man, and the hot body of a 20 year old.

Rakxe didn't know what she was doing anymore. She sounds like she's trying to justify all her emotions for this sky demon dreamwalker.

Her parents would hate her for this.

So she cries harder. Her emotions too big for her body. She was only 17, she was stupid and emotional. She's not sure what about that appeals to Quaritch, but it does. –––––– A few days later, Quaritch returns with Jake Sully and the whole Mangkwan clan.

Rakxe watch through a window, towering over the humans. Quaritch holds hands with the Tsahik and her stomach twists.

It's all chaos outside. Everyone's focused on Jake, meanwhile the Mangkwan make a camp.

Quaritch finally steps foot in the base, looking for her.

When she sees him, she runs up to him, burying her face in his torso as she hug him tightly.

"Woah! Hey there, cupcake," he says, hugging her back.

Those stupid feelings come back and she feels herself get teary eyed.

"I missed you," she mumbled. Rakxe was certain of that. She didn't know if that was good or bad, if what they had was right or not. But she knew she missed him.

He chuckles.

"I missed you too, sugar," he says, pulling her face back to kiss her.

The kiss felt right.

I started writing in first person in the end i had to change it lmaoo 💀

You're lying on your back in Ronal's tent as she checks over the scar on your lower abdomen, her fingers probing around the flesh as she inspects how your wound is healing. She's not exactly being gentle, but she's also not intentionally trying to hurt you as she teases your skin, ensuring that everything inside was still where it was supposed to be.

You wince softly as she presses on the tender scar, and she scoffs under her breath, not meeting your eyes. "You may start helping around the village. But don't strain, or you will tear inside."

You know exactly what she's talking about, because you are a doctor. You've made sure not to lift anything over a few pounds, 'cause you don't plan on giving yourself a hernia any time soon. And you really don't want to reopen the wounds, so you've been doing your best to take it easy.

Her fingers continue to probe around your skin, and you sit up to watch her, wondering why she seemed to be following a pattern, down past your navel, away from the scar left behind by the knife. "What's wrong?"

Her ears twitch in your direction, and you sit up fully, tilting your head to get her attention.

"You are barren." She says after a heavy minute, still avoiding your gaze. You glance at the swell of her stomach, which is almost touching your leg as she leans over you.

"That's good, though, right? I wasn't planning on having a baby any time soon." How could you when you're in the midst of a war? Then again, you never had time to think about it in the first place. You're not exactly against the idea, but you also have to ask yourself, do you love Quaritch enough to give him children? Hell, have you forgiven him enough to start a family with him?

"You do not understand," Ronal hisses, snatching your hand and pressing it below your belly button, fingers digging into your flesh. "Barren. You have no womb."

Your brows furrow and you press into your skin just as she had done, probing around and tracking what organs you can feel. You majored in Xenobiology, with a minor in Homo Pandorus, the Latin name the humans coined the Na'vi. You know both the Avatar and Na'vi bodies like the back of your hand; you could do this in your sleep, and you close your eyes, picturing the diagrams in your mind, making note of what organs you can feel through your elongated abdomen.

But it isn't what you're feeling that bothers you.

It's what you can't.

Your eyes pop open, and you look down at your skin, scrutinizing your flesh, until you make out the faintest line along your navel, between your hip bones, following the seams of your lighter-colored stripes. It was just as faint as the scar in your shoulder where the tracker had been. But it was there.

Barren.

The RDA had... had sterilized you?

Ronal reads your face and jumps away, not one to give out much comfort. She's wearing a strange look on her face, and you feel like her avoidance is intentional. Because there she is, heavily pregnant, blessed with what will be her third child... something that you will never know. Never experience. "You are healed. Speak with Tonowari, and he will help you find purpose in the Clan."

She steps away from you so she can tend to another, but you lay there motionless, processing what you'd just learned.

Had they really taken your womb? Surely not, right? That's just- that's beyond inhumane. To sterilize a person without their consent-

But you're not a person, now are you? Ardmore had always made it clear that you are property;  a walking, talking piece of biomechanical hardware, a scientific miracle. Recombinant human DNA fused with DNA extracted from captive Na'vi, turned into this. You.

Why are you even surprised?

You jump up suddenly and charge out of the tent to hunt down the others. Miles, Z-Dog, and Lyle were all sitting in a circle in their Marui, their hands deftly tying the knots into a new net when you came barging in.

"Z, can you stand up?" You usher her to her feet, pulling her to the mouth of the Marui where the light was better. She looks at you questioningly but follows along, eyeing you cautiously as you crouch in front of her, checking the skin below her stomach. She fidgets under your touch, her skin pimpling with goosebumps as your fingertips ghost over her skin, until you can see the same faint scar, just like yours. You press into her skin, feeling her bladder, but nothing else above it.

"Care to explain?" She asks as you rise to your feet. Your fingertips feel numb and tingly, and you blink away tears as you make sense of this.

Not that you ever thought you ever would have kids one day. With the way you grew up, you were too afraid to screw up on parenting, as your own had done. And when you died, you were barely in your thirties; you still had plenty of time to decide if you wanted children of your own, or if you'd prefer to adopt. There were so many children on Earth in need of families, you thought it to be selfish to just go and make more, but that's just it.

It was your choice.

But now the RDA has stripped that away from you, with no chance of getting it back.

Even this far away, the RDA can still reach you.

Miles calls your name softly, and you hadn't realized he'd come to stand beside you. You avoid his questioning stare and shake your head, turning away from him.

"Nothing, just... just checking something. I'll see you at dinner." You whisper, pulling your arm from his grasp as he catches your elbow. Your skin burns from his gentle touch, and you can feel his concerned gaze burning holes in your back as you all but run away.

You can't talk about this right now. You need time to process.

Jake finds you at the end of a dock on the outskirts of the village about an hour after you had left Ronal's tent. Your feet are dipped into the water, but you do not swirl them around. Instead, you stare out into the ocean, your tears long dried by now, leaving behind streaks that stain your skin.

He groans softly as he crouches to the ground, dropping beside you, close enough that his shoulder brushes against yours. He doesn't say anything at first, choosing to stare out at the water in contemplative silence.

You are the first to break it. "Fuck the RDA."

Jake lets out a wry chuckle, nodding softly. "You can say that again."

"Fuck the RDA," you attempt to flash him a grin, but your lips tremble, and your eyes well up with tears, even though you thought you didn't have any more left to cry. Your voice cracks as you whisper his name. "Jake, they... they-"

"I know, baby girl. I know." He wraps you in his arms, squeezing you tight against his chest, one hand rubbing your back while the other cups your head. You close your eyes and listen to the strong, steady thumping of his heart, sucking in a shaky breath as you calm yourself down.

Even as a kid, Jake had always been your comfort. He filled the emotional void that your father left behind, which was why it was so devastating for you when he left to join the Marines. You understood, of course, because it wasn't his job to raise you; he did it out of obligation. But you were old enough to take care of yourself, at that point, and it was time he spread his wings. And look at where the wind had carried him; a husband, a father, a leader of a great people.

He's selfless. Loving. Fiercely loyal. And above all, he has always listened to his heart, even when his brain tries to convince him otherwise. Although that fact has gotten him into trouble more than once, it was one of the things you loved about him most. His children are lucky to have him as a father, and once more, you feel like you've been robbed.

"How about we get you something to eat and drink, huh? Then I'll take you to Tonowari, and we can find something productive for you to take your mind off things?"

"Sounds like a plan," you mumble, pulling away from him so you could wipe away your tears. "What are my chances of working in the healing tent?"

Jake levels you with a look, and you finally manage to let out a weak chuckle. "Yeah, I thought not."

He pushes off the dock and rises to his feet before offering you his hand. Instinctively, you hold your free hand over the wound on your stomach before realizing that the pain has pretty much disappeared completely. Ronal's herbs have worked wonders on speeding up your healing, and what would normally take a human six to eight weeks to recover, you were back to normal within four.

You straighten your spine, square your shoulders, and trudge along beside him, deciding then and there that you will not let the RDA control you any longer. The damage is done, but that doesn't mean you have to let them have the upper hand and control how you react to it.

Jake swings you by the Marui so he can find you a water bladder and a few fruits still hanging in the basket by the door. You drink and eat your fill, and then follow on his tail as he steers you through the maze of bouncing woven walkways, until you are standing before the largest Marui in the village, opposite the gathering place. Voices float through the door, and Jake holds back the strings of shells for you, ushering you inside with an arm.

The air crackles with nervous energy, and Jake's ears twitch in response as he glides up beside Tonowari, who dismisses a small trio of warriors with a wave of his hand. His lips are pursed in a hard line, and his eyes dance between you and Jake. He turns to the ladder, addressing him first. "Jakesully, I have just received word from some of my hunters."

"What'd they see?"

"Another demon ship passed through our ocean this morning."

"Was it... hunting?"

"Not this time," Tonowari sighs, resting his hands on his hips. "After we sank the last demon ship, the humans know now to stay away. I do not think they will dare to tread these waters again."

"That's where you're wrong," you find your voice, and his eyes track over your face to study you, a flash of concern marring his features. 

"Why do you say this?"

"The RDA doesn't fear anyone. And what's worse, they have no respect for life. The RDA only cares about power and money. Meeting quotas- that's all they want. So if you think sinking one ship out of their entire fleet will make them stop, then you're wrong. They have machines that can make another ship in just a matter of days, and more and more humans fly in every week."

Jake hisses then, flattening his ears as he presses into your side, lowering his voice. "You forget your place. Watch your tone when you're talkin' to the Olo'eytkan."

Then, he turns to Tonowari. "She's still learning our ways here. We're not trying to monger fear; she just means-"

"No, you both need to listen to me," you glare, ignoring him. "The reason they are hunting the Tulkun is to harvest Amrita, a special chemical found in their brains. The humans are using it to fabricate some kind of serum that hinders their aging. To them, it's worth billions. In Na'vi terms, it's as valuable as a soul tree. You would stop at nothing to protect your sacred sites, yes?"

Tonowari nods solemnly, his lips set in a grim line. Jake lets out a frustrated huff of air from his nose, his face hardening.

"It's the same for them. They will stop at nothing to get what they want. The first step was taking down the demon ship, but more will come. We need to hit them before they can hit us-"

"All right, that's enough!" Jake snarls, snatching your arm forcefully, cutting your words off once more. "You can't just come in here and start preaching about startin' a war! There are lives at stake here, innocent families that will get caught in the crossfire if we go pissin' off the RDA more than we already have!"

"No, Jake. The young Sully is right. I was wrong to say that this was not our war when you first came to us, and I was wrong to fear it coming to our waters. But it has been with us, all this time. I will no longer stand by as they slaughter our brothers and sisters for this chemical," he spits the words out as if it were acid on his tongue, "for their souls to be ripped away, their lives cut short. Wasted, for nothing. And if we do not rise up, they will continue to stomp on us, crushing us beneath their pink feet, because we are mistaken in believing they are anything more than what they are. Murderers. Destroyers."

Tonowari steps forward, placing his wide, flat hand on Jake's shoulder, tilting his head respectfully as he acknowledges Jake's title. "I have said it before, and I will say it again. This is the time for Toruk Makto to ride once more. To rally the clans, and remove the pink skins from this world. We must push them out before they destroy us all. It is our duty to defend Eywa's children, and the humans have lost their right to protection when they started this war, all those years ago."

"Jake, why are you against this? I've heard the stories of what you did at Hell's Gate, I know-"

"I don't want to hear it!" 

"You can't hide from who you are, Jake-"

"That's enough!"

Tonowari looks visibly uncomfortable, his eyes dancing between the two of you as your voices rise to shouting. A vein starts to pop out of Jake's forehead as his blood pressure rises, and you can feel your face redden with anger as you try to get it across his thick fucking skull. Why is he not listening?

"No, we have to do this, you have to-"

In the blink of an eye, Jake is in your face, teeth bared, snarling ferociously as he grips you by your arms. "I said enough!" He roars, pushing you backwards until you're stumbling for the door. 

"How could you possibly understand what it's like to be in a war, huh? You died before the last one. Right in front of me. You have no idea what it's like to watch as thousands of Na'vi are slaughtered all around you, because you asked them to! Because I asked them to! Thousands of lives, all that blood, and it's on my hands! And what good did it fucking do? Nothing! Because they came back, fifteen years later, but they fucking came back! And now everyone is telling me to do it again, but it's nothing like last time! Because it ain't just me anymore; this is my home, my family, and if I fuck up again, it will be their blood!" He was seething now, almost nose-to-nose with you, his harsh tone causing tears to spring up around your eyes, because right now, you don't see Jake.

You see your father, the human man from Earth, who wasted every penny on beer, and every breath on screaming harsh words at you. Who never said a nice thing to your mother, who never took the blame for himself, because every problem in his life was your fault. Jake has that same look in his eye. As if asking him to rally the clans is the same as asking to kill his family, and somehow its on you.

Jake is talking down to you, and you're just about fed up with it.

"Jake, I'm sure the People understand the sacrifices that they made when they agreed to follow you, because this is their home. How can you expect them to sit back and watch it be overrun by the humans?"

"I don't want to hear any more of this from you. Go and find the kids; we'll regroup later when you can clear your head."

"My head is clear, and stop trying to brush me off! You're treating me like a kid!"

"Then stop acting like one! You're not Olo'eyktan, you don't get to make war plans, and your voice won't be heard by anyone but me because you're not even really one-"

And then his eyes widen, and your heart drops into your stomach.

He sucks in a breath, as do you, and you both stare at each other, the words hanging in the tense space between the two of you. There was no reigning them in; they were out now. You don't get to make war plans, because you're not even really one of the People. He didn't have to say it, you knew exactly where that sentence was going before it even left his mouth.

"You're right, Jake. I'm not one of the People. I'm not Na'vi. I'm an alien, made in a lab by the same fucking pink skins that are destroying this place, that are trying to kill the Great Mother. I don't need you reminding me."

With that, you storm away, slapping the strings of shells away from you as you step through the doorway. Footsteps follow behind, and you walk faster to avoid Jake, until two small voices call your name in hot pursuit as you flee from the Marui, hot tears streaming down your cheeks. You'd thought you'd cried everything out already, but apparently not. Today has been one long emotional roller coaster, and you've reached your limit of shit for the day.

"Slow down, wait for us!" Kiri whisper-yells, jumping from behind the tent where she and Lo'ak had been eavesdropping. 

"I just... want to be alone right now, guys." Your voice wavers as you flee, but they catch up easily enough. You still need to rebuild your strength and stamina, and by the time you navigate the winding walkways to the edge of the water, you're wheezing. They are embarrassingly unfazed by the exercise.

"Listen, Dad shouldn't have said that about you," Lo'ak huffs, dropping down beside you as you pounce off the walkway, landing in the soft sand below as you make a beeline for the shore.

"Yeah, he's got no place talking about not being one of the People. So what if you are not full Na'vi, neither is he." Kiri jumps to your defense, and in the back of your mind, you whisper, so are you two. They understand. All one has to do is look at the pinky on their hands, and they are marked as half-breed.

"Besides, we all agree with you. We can't just sit back and do nothing. Payakan has been speaking with the Tulkun, trying to get them to understand that they can't keep letting themselves be murdered, that it's time to fight back. If we can get the Metkayina to rally with him, then the Tulkun might listen. We can take the fight to them, and put a stop to what they are doing." There's a twinge of hope in Lo'ak's voice, and Kiri nods.

"We push the humans back, and then it will be safe to go home. But Dad won't listen, none of them will. And Mother only ever takes his side."

The cold water greets your toes, and you sink down into the water, sitting with your legs tucked beneath you as you bury your hands into the wet sand, sucking in a few steadying breaths to ground yourself, calming your racing heart.

"I get it, his fear. He's got a lot more riding on him than he did before; I know that. But this is also your futures we're talking about. What kind of world is he going to force you to grow up in if he lets the humans take over? Trust me, I've seen Earth. I've seen what the humans can do, and so has he. Why would he run the risk of them doing the same here, when he can do something now? Before more of them get here?" You think aloud, vocalizing your feelings before they roil inside of you, like the sea. "He still treats me like I'm a kid. Like I don't know anything. But I lived in Bridgehead, and Quaritch knows it even better than I do. He knows schematics; he knows what they've got hiding in their armory. With his knowledge, we could plan an assault so great and sudden that they wouldn't stand a chance! We could end this... but he's scared!"

They both remain silent. Lo'ak sits to your left, Kiri at your right. She reaches over and finds your fingers, still buried in the sand. She wraps her small hand around yours, clasping it hard enough that you look over at her. Despite her youth, there's a certain wisdom in her eyes that can only be acquired by time. Grace's eyes. "All we can do is have faith that Eywa will speak to him, send him a vision. Maybe then he will listen. But he's not exactly known for his brilliance, you know?"

At this, you laugh, so sharp and sudden that you wind up snorting. And then it bubbles up before you can stop it, more laughter. Your shoulders shake, and you look away from her as she cracks a huge grin. Even Lo'ak was shaking his head, hiding his smirk.

"You know," you mumble tearfully, wiping your eyes with the back of your arm to avoid getting sand in your eyes, "Tommy and I used to make fun of him so much because he's just so... dense."

"Why do you think Mom calls him skxaung? She always has, all the time. His mouth moves faster than his brain, and he just says the dumbest things sometimes," Kiri chuckles.

"He's always been that way. Do first, think later. It's saved his life many times, but it's also got him in lots of trouble. I know he didn't... mean it. I know he was just heated, and he got carried away. But I'm serious. I'm done standing by while people get hurt. I want to help, I want to do something." And most importantly, you want to be accepted.

"Well, let's start with training. You need to get your strength up anyway, and you need to start learning our ways. No offense, but you don't exactly scream Na'vi when you barely know how to weave a basket." Lo'ak finally chimes in, and you glare playfully, your tears finally dried. You feel tired, the kind that rests deep in your bones. You feel heavy, but you feel ready.

"I want to prove to him, and to everyone, that I belong. That I'm not weak. Not anymore."

"We can help," awkwardly, Lo'ak pats your shoulder. "But first, we're supposed to be helping prepare the fish for the feast tonight. Let's go find Tsireya."

He spins on his heel and all but bounds away at the mention of the girl's name, and you and Kiri share a look behind his back. He'll go running anywhere, so long as Tsireya is involved.

A creeping headache starts to throb at your temples, and you massage them as you walk, weaving between the Metkayina people as they move along the walkways, like a flowing river. You follow closely behind Kiri until a hand reaches out from the crowd, pulling you to the side.

You'd recognize the warm, calloused touch of Quaritch anywhere. He pulls you aside to a narrow passage between two Marui, smoothing his palms down the length of your arms. "I heard you and Jake had a fight. Wanted to check on you."

Beads of sweat are gathered on his forehead, and the tops of his shoulders are tinted purple from overexposure to the sun, but his attention is solely on you. You inhale sharply, nodding as you avoid his gaze, your cheeks turning a shade of pink as you flush.

"You heard about that?"

"No, I heard it, we were on the other side of the gathering place, laying down wood for the fire tonight. I couldn't make out the words, but I knew it was your voice. And you ran out of there pretty fast, so I assumed it was something bad."

"It was just Jake being... Jake." You grumble, crossing your arms over your chest. The wooden beads and twisting knots of your top dig into your arms as you do, but you don't mind. You have to keep your hands busy; otherwise you'll find yourself touching him. And you want to, so bad, but now isn't the time.

"Hey," he murmurs, and you look up suddenly as he grips your chin, tilting your head back until you're forced to meet his stare. "What was that all about, with Z earlier? You seemed really upset, but you ran away from me. And even now, you're hiding. I thought we were... fixing stuff, you know?"

Your lips part as you let out a soft sigh, and you don't miss the way his eyes flicker down to your mouth. The muscle in his jaw twitches as he keeps himself in check.

"When Ronal was checking my wounds for the last time, she discovered a surgical scar along my lower pelvic region. Since I don't have the equipment to take a deeper look, I had to rely on feel. From that, we discovered that the RDA took preventative measures when it comes to conception." You default to the technical terms, because that was easier for you to say. His brows furrow in confusion, and you continue. "In other words, they performed a sterilization surgery on me and Z-Dog. A hysterectomy, probably only partial, since I'm pretty sure my cervix is intact."

"Care to explain that like you're talking to a normal person of average intelligence?"

You know he's trying to use humor as a way of softening you up, but your lips barely twitch in response. "They took my uterus. Made it so I can never get pregnant. Not that I'm sure if I even could get pregnant, I mean, sure they can create Recombinant avatars, but as far as a functional reproductive system... that's territory they haven't attempted to explore yet. So I don't know, maybe they just did it as a precaution so there wouldn't be some horrifically mutated creatures being born on base, or they did it because they're awful bastards with no souls, but either way, they stole all of that from me, so I guess we'll never know-"

He cuts off your frantic rambling with a kiss, stifling your words with his mouth. His tongue smoothes over your bottom lip, and you relax into him, wrapping your arms around his waist. His own snake around your shoulders, and he breaks the kiss before it can get too heated.

"I'm sorry," he starts. "Ain't got nothin' better to say than that. I'm sorry."

You shrug, because what else is there to say?

"I'm so sick of decisions being made for me. I'm tired of being handled."

He scoffs. "I get that. Neteyam reminds me of my first drill sergeant back in Basic. It's like talking to a rock."

He kisses the top of your head, pulling away reluctantly. That awkwardness returns because you feel like you should say something, but you're not quite sure what that something is. he clears his throat, and then reaches into the small pouch tied around the waist of his tewng. From it, he pulls out a braided string. From the center, a large pink scallop shell dangled as the main charm, surrounded by smaller beads on both sides.

His ears turn a shade of pink as he holds it out, not quite looking at you.

"I was informed by my drill sergeant," meaning Neteyam, "that it is a traditional courting practice to provide your partner with jewelry, so... I made this." Gingerly, you take it in your hands, unable to hide your smile as you look it over. The braided twine started off with one pattern, but somewhere halfway through, he must have miscounted or forgotten his place, because it turns into an entirely different braid. The main shell was off-center, and there were three extra beads on the right than on the left, but you hold it to your chest, thanking him.

You wrap it around your neck and tie it, doubling the knot so it was secure. Your mouth falls open, and then you snap it shut.

"See you at dinner?" He finally shatters the silence, and you nod, just as Neteyam shouts for him to return to the group.

"See you at dinner," since it was the only place you were allowed without a chaperone following your every move.

quaritch never admitted it out loud to you, you knew either way that he wouldn’t, but he had a thing for fucking your thighs, either when he was tired, or you were, but both needed something.

you weren’t in a relationship with quaritch, it was more of a fuck buddy situation, ever since he’s a recom now, his sex drive has been to where you can’t keep up with him at times.

so, that’s when quaritch started fucking your thighs.

he settled his cock between your legs, one large and calloused hand holding your ankles together with your legs raised in the air, he had placed two pillows under you, one for your head and one for your back, the beds at the rda base weren’t that comfortable, especially for this.

“Comfortable there, sweetheart?” Quaritch asked, already giving impatient and shallow little thrusts in between your thighs that were pressed nicely together.

“Mhm, I’m all good,” you replied with as a soft moan slipped past your lips when quaritch’s cock had brushed right against your folds, “Jus’ keep fucking my thighs,” you teased as you dragged your hand along quaritch’s chest and grabbing at his dog tags lightly in your fingers.

a heavy groan slipped out of quaritch’s lips before he placed his right on your thigh while the other remained locked around your ankles and started pumping his hips back and forth, his cock disappearing for a moment only for the head and then the rest to reappear between your thighs. “That’s the plan, sugar,” he answered as his nails dug into your skin while his ears flattened, his dog tags swinging back and forth against his chest while he pumped his hips like an animal.

each time quaritch had pumped his hips, his cock head thrusted right against your already swollen pink clit, each time he had done that, a whine slipped past pouty lips, you could feel yourself getting close to coming, “mh— gonna come” you started babbling, even without penetration, just with quaritch pumping his hips back and forth wildly, his leaking tip jumping at your clit was enough to make you come.

“I know, I know baby, got a feelin’ you were boutta come,” quaritch mumbled, sweat starting to bead on his forehead as his cock continued to piston between your thighs and rub at your clit over and over. “go on, ‘s alright, you can come.”

It all started with small inconsistencies in their world. Memories they never lived through. And a voice that didn’t belong to any of them.

Finding out their entire lives were never real broke something inside them. Everything that has happened to them was all a story now. Nothing was ever truly real.

Except for one thing you. The only truly real thing they had left.

And that led them to a dark obsession

They searched endlessly for anything from your world. Everything they found find became precious to them. Every piece of media, every piece of art, every article was like gold to them.

But their attention never drifted far from you. Everything they found somehow kept finding its way back to you. That’s all that consumed their minds not humanity just you.

They watched you through screens. Trying to remember every part of you.

One thing was clear

It all started with small inconsistencies in their world. Memories they never lived through. And a voice that didn’t belong to any of them.

Finding out their entire lives were never real broke something inside them. Everything that has happened to them was all a story now. Nothing was ever truly real.

Except for one thing you. The only truly real thing they had left.

And that led them to a dark obsession

They searched endlessly for anything from your world. Everything they found find became precious to them. Every piece of media, every piece of art, every article was like gold to them.

But their attention never drifted far from you. Everything they found somehow kept finding its way back to you. That’s all that consumed their minds not humanity just you.

They watched you through screens. Trying to remember every part of you.

One thing was clear

Of course the commander wasn't at all bothered by Spider's sudden cooperation and was pleased when told about the Ikran ceremony. Quaritch got praises from everybody but they just fell on deaf ears, even Lyle, who was there for the outburst, tried cheering him up by getting him a burger and a beer from the cafeteria.

“Some food that doesn't try to kill you.”

Quaritch just stared, even when Lyle left, the man couldn't believe himself as he wasn't wanting a burger and beer but those stupid little fruits you had given them that tasted amazing. Even the meat of those strange Pandoran animals made his mouth water more than human food, but was it the food he was missing or you?

The Colonel took a very long shower and just lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling. He was so pissed at everything.

Some native managed to burst their way into his mind simply by always questioning his authority, someone who spoke their mind but he also saw the softness that they had.

You were an enigma since the start.

Quaritch eventually flicked off his bedside lamp causing the room to plunge into darkness. The Colonel just closed his eyes, thinking that sleep would cleanse his mind of you.

He was wrong.

You felt sick.

After you left the others and returned to your home in the floating mountains you didn't sleep at all without Spider being next to you, you couldn't eat most foods without thinking about how much Spider loved helping you with dinner prep, you couldn't even weave without the image of the boy showing off a wonky replica of what you were working on. Your whole life revolved around Spider, at least most of it, so you threw yourself into the one thing that Spider couldn't infiltrate into. Fighting.

You took every offer of patrolling of taking out RDA supply trains, Scorpions that were getting too close to the floating mountains, even taking out RDA patrols that had multiple AMP suits. Anything and everything that you could do you took, you pushed your body to its limits but ignored any pain you felt, if you stopped for a moment then images of Spider would flash through your mind along with that stupid Colonel with their matching smiles and the way you all looked like one happy family.

When you weren't.

You weren't family.

Spider and Quaritch were family by blood but you spent over a decade raising the boy, teaching him how to survive despite his body not being built for Pandora, does that all go up in flames just because of blood relations?

You were so deep into thought you didn’t notice the shadows at the door and it wasn’t until someone cleared their throat that you tensed up on the spot.

“Oel ngati kameie.” (I see you.)

Your head snaps to look behind you and you see Tsarem standing there, you quickly turn and raise your hand to head. “Oel ngati kameie Olo'eyktan.” (I see you clan leader.) You quickly turn to hide your bandaged arm, not wanting him to see the injury.

“I just came to check in..you seemed out of it recently.”

A lot of things have changed recently.

Not only did the whole argument with Quaritch happen but when you returned apparently the whole Sully family left, and Jake had passed down the title of Olo'eyktan to Tsarem. He was a good warrior, he was softer than Jake but still led with an iron fist.

“Thank you for stopping by but I am fine.” You turn back quickly and return to packing up Spiders things, it broke you every time you pick up one of his items as each one reminds you of a specific memory.

“You say that yet you are packing up Spiders things and last time I checked he did not want to join the scientists.”

You could feel the Olo'eyktan’s eyes burning into the back of your head and your movements became more harsh. “With all due respect, Spider should not concern you.”

“You are right, it shouldn't.” Tsarem’s voice stayed flat. “But it does because he is your son and he is part of the Omatikaya just as you are.”

You stopped.

You stared down at the toy in front of you, it was of a wooden ikran you had made for Spider when he was little, it was very poorly made as your hands werent used to carving but the boy loved it even once he got past the age of playing with toys. Your vision began to blur as unshed tears lined your eyes and you felt your own tail wrap itself around your leg and you did everything in your power to hold in the sob that threatened to come out of your mouth.

“So I will say this, not as your Olo'eyktan but as your friend.” You felt a hand come on your shoulder and you turned to look at the man.

“Spider loves you, you may not be his birth mother but that boy does nothing but boast about you when you arent around and I know how you act when you are away from the boy too long, whatever is happening will not last forever. If I know anything its that you two need each other even if it makes some of the others unhappy with a human being here.”

You couldnt stop the stream of tears that poured from your eyes as you let out small sobs.

You felt arms wrap around you and you didnt hesitate to do the same as your body racked from your sobs alone and you hear Tsarem whisper.

“It is alright my 'eylan.” (friend)

You stood there for a few moments just sobbing, letting out everything that has been bottled up since you adopted Spider and Tsarem stayed there with you the entire time, you have never been more glad that you had Tsarem as a friend.

“Come.” Tsarem gently begins to lead you to the outside of your home.

“What? Where are we going?” You use a hand to wipe away your tears and to hopefully clean up the mess that you are.

“We are going on a flight! Not as a leader and warrior but as two friends!” Tsarem grinned at you and you couldnt help the small laugh that escaped you.

“You’re going to get us in trouble!”

“I am Olo'eyktan! No one is going to yell at me!” The Na’vi man then stops and rubs the back of his neck. “Except for Mo’at, she will most likely do it.”

You couldnt help the laugh you let out as you followed Tsarem more and soon you both were on your ikrans soaring through the sky, laughing together as you shared stories of Spider from when he was younger and Tsarem sharing some of Tsu’tey when they were younger.

When the sun set and the moon began to rise was when you both returned to the floating mountains, he invited you to sit with him and you accepted, you spent the next few hours eating and chatting with fellow Na’vi before you returned to your home for the night.

You stared at the box of Spider things and it was when you started thinking back to when you had that moment with Quaritch. You could feel the realization slowly wash over you as you know why you got so upset at Quaritch.

It was not because he basically confessed to you without realizing.

It was because a part of you hoped he knew.

A part of you wanted him to mean it, to mean that he was going to court you.

You felt your heart pounding in your chest as the realization washed over you.

You had fallen in love with a sky demon