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I remember starting to tell someone what went on in my head. Once I started telling them how I felt about the plus running through my body, how on certain days I hated it and wanted to end it, I saw their face. I told them I am sorry. I shared a piece of me even I am scared of.

The entirety of my childhood and young adult life I was told to beware of my surroundings. That the most dangerous things in my life will be the outside beings. They didn’t warn me of me. They never told me that I would be my worst nightmare. I was so caught up in what outside force is making me want to die that I didn’t stop to think that maybe, just quite possibly the thing that wants me to die is me. I am no drug. I am no murderer. I am not an alcoholic drink. We did not have a ribbon week dedicated to protect me from me. I had no clue that I would be the biggest threat to my life. I was not raised to. The education system has failed me. I know what to do with a quadratic equation but I do not know what to do when I become scared of myself. I am clueless. I am ashamed. I am discouraged knowing that the education system continues to fail people.