the dreamer wakes

I had a colorful HS life, I mean, who didn’t have one? It’s where most of my unforgettable experiences occurred. My first love, my true love, heart breaks, best friendships and the glory days.

I defined myself as a friendly person then. “Then” being an operative word because it changed when I went to college where most of my self-discoveries happened. I realized, I was a people-pleaser and a shy-type for that matter. I love to have friends, but there were only a few I had kept - but at this point, this is moot because it all happens to everyone, you make a lot of friends and slowly, those who are meant to stay they stay while those who don’t they just simply fall away.

In HS, I had a couple of “best friends” and for some reason, we labeled our friendships that way and even had monthsaries to celebrate it because well, it’s a relationship. I think I had four to five when I look back, two of them became my exes. Typical best friends turned into lovers but I don’t regret going that far though. They remain special but both had fallen away.

Anyway, looking back I had two close friends that I even share a table with. They were my seat mates, I even talk to them I think almost everyday for two - three hours on the phone. But I never called or labeled them as my best friends. We just share opinions, thoughts and all. As the years passed, as we went to different colleges, of course those things changed but once in a while we’ll get together and both were always present.

At my current situation right now, having a break means spending so much time at home. My job then was in the city and I rent for my own and seldom come home. My point is, during this break, I have come to realize that these two people, these seat mates I had back in HS were my real best friends. Not because I often spend time with them lately since they work in town, but because of all the friends I had in HS, they were the ones who never ceased communicating. We don’t text much often but when we do, it seems like things have never changed.

I am happy to have a chance at this kind of break, it made me realize a lot of things. Well, it was my intention to begin with. I am 25, and still in a work in progress. It’s true what they say, friendship is also hard work, you reach out until you don’t then it falls apart.

I am just happy to have real friends. These two know my secrets, we're like trios but not really, we talk about anything under the sun, they scrutinize me as I to them and they accept me as who I am.