Why Must Things Always Happen

Superhero team as a metaphor for online friendship

I've known you for years, but don't know your name. I trust you with my biggest fears, but you'll never even know how I look. I wish I could take you to my favourite coffee shop or park, but I'll never be able. If something were to happen to you I would never know. You are one of most important people in my life, I wish I could introduce you to others

so i put my hands up theyre playing my song the evil skull flies away

it's meee I'm your guardian angel hiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 so. in about six months, you're gonna die of starvation. 🥺 and if I don't protect you, I will get: #fired! 🫢 and that is No Good 🙅‍♀️ hahaaa So. 🙏 I looked into causes of starvation, and it turns out: Your death is totally preventable! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 There's more than enough food to sustain you without interfering with anyone else's survival, but you're not allowed to have it! 🤨 Whaaat? 🤷‍♀️ Apparently, your death is premeditated by thousands of things called "shareholders." So. 🙏 I've been killing people,

i hate everything..... i wish i was a beetle....

hey guysss so unfortunately the rumors are true and im leaving the narrative. Buttt the good news is my absence will create such a gaping hole in your lives that it will become a sort of presence itself, and so in a way it will kind of be like i never left! But i am. Leaving just to be clear.

Let’s all actually do this

using my autism power (Focused Analysis) to locate the closest narcissist and immediately befriend them to increase our joint slay