this blog is a relic of a really dark time

my talent is knowing the exact coping skills that will help me feel better at any given moment and then deciding not to use them anyway

okay i lied 3. Attention

like no offense… but the past most definitely just feels fake. like it just feels like it didn’t actually happen. like it just feels fake. i don’t like remembering things. it’s just a blurry little snapshot in my head. it just doesn’t seem real.

bpd is a trap: either you bottle everything up and become self-destructive or you express how you feel and people call you ‘manipulative’ and tell you you ‘overreact’   

if more than two inconvenient things happen to me in a 24 hour time period i automatically wanna kill myself

Bpd feels like you’re screaming “I’M NOT OKAY, PLEASE HELP” at the top of your lungs over and over again, but everyone’s just pleasantly ignoring you.

*experiences the most mild form of rejection possible* im gonna fucking kill myse-

so hey who else was taught as a kid that “”””wanting attention”””” in any way was wrong and shameful and has grown up unable ask for help or support even in great distress/suffering