The Salty Spitoon

oh my fuckning

UNMUTE THIS

What?

Black holes.....the ultimate succ

literally nothing is stopping you from putting on a petticoat and getting a damn milkshake how many times do we as a society have to go though this

Like I swear to fucking god, you can have the aesthetic without wishing for everything from an awful time period to come back.

calm your tits. there's still milkshakes and racism 

Yoooooooooo

I hate that it’s the right note so much

concept: instead of hedwig, Harry goes into the pet store and this little snake in the back of the store talks to him, obviously gets his attention more than the other animals, and harry feels sorry for it so he takes it home. Then the snake helps Harry throughout his years at hogwarts as harry carries it wrapped around his hand all like “pssssst, haaarryyy, the dark lord isss coming sss” or just petty shit like “haaaarrryy, now is the time, assskkk out cho chaaannngg”

Third year he eats Scabbers and saves them all a lot of time

So sweet

A demon that writes messages on your mirror with blood but they’re useful messages. Like “remember you have yoga at 6 tonight”

“You need to leave him, Karen”.

I am so here for this

I just spit water all over my desk… this is amazing

Listen to Rh'lygh, Brenda.