The Beast of Thorns

Oh. He hadn’t even considered that. The poor thing.

“Just because you’re dead doesn’t mean you can’t eat. Look at me! I downed almost all the pineapple and I’ve been dead for over a thousand years.” Mortem paused, and gently grabbed one of Theodore’s hands. “If it helps, that body of yours is pretty functional. You have a heartbeat, functional lungs, the works.”

He gave the hand a smooch. 

“I think you forgot the fish and salad.” He muttered, a small smile on his face. “And I suppose that is true, it is just a little unsettling for me to have a body again but not truly be alive...” 

He scooted over a bit and ran a hand over Mortem’s face. “Thank you very much for helping me, my love.” 

“Oh. Well then. This makes things awkward. Forgive me,” he stammered.

Mort resumed eating his salad, less sad this time, just… kind of in awe at what this day had turned into.

“Not awkward from my perspective, although it does make me a bit excited for our next date.” Theodore chuckled, returning his attention to his own meal. He picked up his fork and prepared to finally dig into his salad, but then he paused.

I... I don’t feel hungry. Why, why don’t I feel-

He raised an eyebrow at Theodore, somehow ignoring the rather delightful finger kisses, and then his smile grew even wider.

“Theo, I’m gonna ask you point blank, you wanna fuck? I… I’m sorry, I just can’t believe you used a cherry joke. I thought only I did that,” he laughed.

Theodore started blushing madly. “Er, I was not making a joke I was being serious...” 

He glanced off to the side and ran a hand through his hair, face still bright red. “Well I suppose I would like to at some point but I doubt this is the right setting for such a thing, besides I doubt you are finished lunch.” 

“Immensely, my… Theodore.” 

Thinking of a new pet name was going to be difficult, wasn’t it? Ah well, he could do that later. Mortem gave him an impish smile, and picked up a smaller chunk of pineapple in his claws. He then gently shoved it into Theodore’s mouth, eagerly waiting to see how he would react to its interesting flavor.

He blinked at the sudden fruit but did not recoil, biting into it and taking a moment to savour its taste. “Well that was certainly strange, I do not think I’ve ever had that kind of fruit before.” 

Theodore, what the heck!? He couldn’t kiss you back with his mouth full of food! He had to break the kiss for a moment to swallow, and then promptly resumed making out with him. 

He pulled Theodore into his lap, and crooned in contentment. Lunch had been completely forgotten as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, hands slowly rubbing his back in gentle circles.

The one eyed prince grinned at seeing that his kiss was well received. After the kiss had gone of for a couple more moments he broke out of it and rested his head on Mortem’s shoulder. 

He snuggled up to him as best he could and sighed happily, one hand reaching out and tracing circles on the king’s chest. 

Mortem’s face fell.

“…Okay.”

His earlier giddiness faded, and he just decided the salad was more appetizing than any more conversation.

Oh heck no!

He blushed an intense shade of green, and… was that orange light seeping through his shirt?

“So are you, Theodorable!” he roared.

And with that he slammed his fist into the table, launching a spoon into the air and onto the floor. 

“I am going to kiss you so much after you eat, you cute… I don’t have the word!”

He stuffed a fish into his mouth and swallowed it whole. Much grace, much class, wow.

An awkward snort escaped him at the sight of Mortem being such a dork, but it soon fell when he recalled the nickname that he had been called. 

Theodorable...

“Erm, Mortem I would... I would ask that you not call me by that name please.” He muttered, nervously scratching at the back of his head. “I understand what you mean by it but it.... it brings back painful memories for me.” 

“Ha! It definitely is, but last time I checked, frosting isn’t exactly something served with an entree, is it?” Mortem teased.

He was glad it was just the two of them, because was definitely not appropriate talk for the dining table. He didn’t care, he was going to escalate it as far as Theo would allow him to.

Theodore threw his head back and started roaring with laughter. “You, you-” 

Mortem shuddered and nearly choked on his slice of pineapple.

“Now now, dessert has to wait, Theo-dork,” he purred.

It didn’t stop him from slithering a hand underneath the table and slowly running it up Theodore’s abdomen. Two could play at this game.

A loud, startled squeak escaped the one eyed man and he nearly fell out of his chair in surprise. His fork landed on the table and it took him a moment to settle himself, a faint blush on his face from both the touch and the words that had been spoken. 

Mortem led Theodore upstairs and into a lavishly decorated room. A table made of mahogany had been dragged into the center, and a meal fit for a king and his consort plated on it. Their lunch contained fish, fruit, and even a salad. There was a bottle of wine, should they wish to drink, along with a pitcher of tea. Unfortunately for the pair, the ice had long since melted.

“Oh, by the sun, it smells good… That pineapple is mine!” Mortem purred.

He rushed over to claim one of the chairs (and said pineapple) for his own. He did set a plate down in a chair next to him for Theodore though.

Theodore snorted at the adorable sight and rolled his eye. He was unable to stop himself from laughing as he spoke, teasing the king. “Tsk tsk, I see where I stand in terms of our relationship.”

He quickly joined Mortem and happily sat down beside him. He grabbed some salad and fruit. After placing them on his plate he grabbed a fork with one hand while the other stealthily reached down and caressed Mortem’s thigh.

“Our lunch. It’s gotten cold!” The King scrambled to his feet. “We can kiss later, come on!”

Mortem grabbed Theodore by the hand and began to drag him toward the stairs in an attempt to put the date back on track.

Mortem broke the kiss and snuggled up to Theodore, almost knocking him over with his weight. He was still purring. This was one very happy and semi-relaxed fishman. Either way, the King was content to bask in Theo’s affection for the time being.

Theodore chuckled and made sure to keep his scritches up. “My my, you are quite the needy beast after all~”

He leaned down, face close to Mortem’s. “Although I have to admit all of this... activity has left me feeling famished~” 

He did not expect that. At all.

He had expected him to run, or to turn him into the next entree with his powers. Not to kiss him. Mortem wrapped his arms around Theodore, and leaned into the kiss. He was not sure he deserved it right now, but he would take it.

…he may have also started purring. Hopefully the other man wouldn’t be put off by that.

Theodore blinked at the sudden purring but he did not pull back. Instead, his smile grew and, without breaking out of the kiss, reached out and started running a hand up and down Mortem’s chest. 

“I cannot. I lack the power, and I am not afraid!”

The look on his face proved otherwise.

“I told you the truth. I will bring an end to war, to violence, to murder… No one will suffer again under my reign! Call me insane all you wish, but this is the only way. I just wish Lucien had not insinuated things so early.”

Theodore paused and then tears started to fall from his eye. He kept his arms wrapped around Mortem nice and tight. “Mortem I am sorry, I am so very, very sorry.” 

“Their bodies must be suitable for a world full of water. And their minds survive! All I take is their energy should I consume their flesh.”

He dares not look at him. He can’t show weakness. He dare not show any more than he has already.

A world full of water...

Horror, fear, and hurt. “Mortem that does not make sense! You cannot... drown the world, even if you change people into fish! The natural landscape, the forests-”