Court Ordered Smackdown Booking

My fiancé (on and off WWE fan since childhood) accidentally dragged me into wrestling fandom and now I’m like committed.

Currently not watching WWE due to Obvious Reasons (lesnar, and on top of that just a kinda depleting satisfaction with quality, you know how it is) but I may still comment on current happenings (particularly the dogshit booking). There are a lot of wrestlers I really adore there and want to see succeed…and, you know, be in a promotion that actually gives a shit.

Pretty well into my AEW arc at this point, also getting into ROH! And trying to watch more indies.

Have seen WWE (smackdown) and AEW (dynamite+collision three hour thang) live, ideally seeing ROH (death before dishonor) live!

I don't have a real tag list yet it just kinda happens how it happens, generally speaking i try to tag wrestler-specific stuff with "file under: [gimmick name/epithet/related thing]", you'll know 'em when they come up. also "hot take station" which is me complaining about wrestling twitter being fucking obtuse.

i loooooove yapping about kayfabe and booking decisions i am so sorry. once a given broadcast ends analysis brain turns on.

85% of any shipping jokes i make are jokes. but also 100% of them are purely intended as part of kayfabe. the balance between kayfabe shipping and rpf is so fascinating and such a delicate line so i just wanted to note that here.

I guess secondary note I said the above but also the swerve/hangman feud has ruined me for most “enemies to lovers” fics, if they’re not burning each other’s houses down or drinking their blood or whatever what are we even DOING

i do occasionally lapse into discussion of fanbase misogyny/racism/other forms of bigotry. again, analysis brain.

Sorting the "proper" lists by promotion because good lord so many. i've given up on sorting but generally whoever's listed first is my number one.

Despite no longer watching WWE i still have a soft spot for: Damian Priest (I’m gay and also a sucker for older brother types independent of the gay aspect), Rhea Ripley (I’m still gay), Sami Zayn (what are we doing), Bayley (GIRL JUMP SHIP!!!!), Liv Morgan (love to hate her), Jordynne Grace (women….), Bianca Belair (made me cry at Elimination Chamber and also LIVE ON SMACKDOWN), Naomi (has done nothing wrong ever, made me understand what divorce feels like), Lyra Valkyria (she’s birb).

Current AEW List is: Maya World (i love her so much), Willow Nightingale (have you SEEN her), Kris Statlander (what a WOMAN), Toni Storm (yeah.), Speedball Mike Bailey (nonbinary solidarity), Bandido (the 21plex is so fucking good) and Brody King (abolish ICE!!!!!) and thus also Brodido as a duo (I love them), Hechicero was originally for the memes but actually he RULES, Ace Austin (i get way too excited when he shows up), There Will be more.

I admittedly still have a soft spot for hanger (mainly because there are more pressing issues (ospreay) but he’s in fave jail for being an irl idiot.

I don't have a real list for TNA because LOLTNA but I am very fond of Mike Santana and he dESERVES BETTER

Special unnumbered honorable mentions: party girls (fka Kayden Carter and Katana Chance) (Lacey Lane showed up in ROH please let this mean they’re going after the tag belts), Carmelo Hayes (DESERVES BETTER), MJF who I want to punt like a damn football every time i see him, Hyan, Rina, and plenty of AEW folks (and non-AEW folks) I’ve seen in passing but cannot truly rank until I actually watch them enough