The Worm Jar

Just got arrested for doing femt while driving

The only thing keeping airplanes aloft is that more particles bump into the bottom of the wing than the top

Women in STEM scare me

Modern military ballistics is just humanity being really far down the rock-throwing skill tree

While there may be only 89 seconds until midnight, why aren’t people watching asking about the quality of the average t-shirt as risen in multitudes?

They say there’s plenty of fish in the sea but they forget most fish don’t fuck each other

People who use whom correctly think they’re the shit until meet someone who uses whermst

Yup is an incrementally more efficient affirmative response as opposed to yes

My toxic trait is forgetting that I would have not chance surviving in a a world before modern optometry

Oil could've been a renewable resource if we had prepped better

If you come across a fork in the road, please remove it to prevent pedestrian harm.

Do I say the things I say because I believe they're right or because I know they're right?

Phones are just really advanced rocks