A Stranger's Moments

Writer's Note: This post is created by a hopeless and romantic (pun intended), bitter and loveless lady who have not found a lasting and happy relationship in the arms of her dream prince charming. (Did I mention that this lady is romantic?). In short, I will be ranting.

Someone should have warned the 14-year old me, that finding love at this age is next to impossible. And I mean this age of TInder, Badoo, Whisper, and so many other hook-up applications. Or maybe it has already started with the rise of texting and chatting.

What would I have done at 14 if I knew that this will happen?

No,  I don't regret any of the failed relationships that I've had. I don't regret breaking up with someone whom I thought didn't care enough about me. I don't regret being cheated 4 times by 4 different guys over their exes. And I will never regret ending a long-term relationship with someone who put his ego first over me. Then what could the 14-year old me have done? I guess nothing but try to learn to be happy without depending on the presence of a guy in my life. Go out more and meet new people, spend more time with friends, and DO NOT download any dating applications that I will hear about. Lastly, do not dwell on any book with a romantic genre! (So you could guess that I am a romance novel addict, and won't read any book unless there is romance in it.)

Chivalry is long dead..

Like 14 years ago. Nobody taught the boys then and men now that in riding any source of public transportation, they should let the woman in first! Or when crossing a street, stay on the side where cars are likely to come from, to shield a woman from them (just in case!). They should know that texting a woman is not the most romantic gesture in the world. That it shouldn't take much effort to make a woman feel important and beautiful. That in times when things have gone further and love-making (hopefully it is love) has already taken place, a woman needs a cuddle. She needs to be reassured in the morning that what transpired is not a one-night thing. That she is not just some object used to get laid. They should have known that there is still a woman out there searching for a serious relationship. Not this thing this age of dating has called Hookup.

The Hookup System

When I've learned of all these dating sites, and yes I have tried a lot, I thought I will be seeing my prince charming in AT LEAST one of them. But the only thing they have done for me is change and pollute all the things that I used to know about dating. They have taken the romance out of it. What do they call the system now? Hookup. Wikipedia defines it as something like an electrical connection. Then there is the Hookup Culture (and I still insist on calling it system because it is truly disgusting to call it culture) which according to Wikipedia "is one that accepts and encourages casual sexual encounters, including one-night stands and other related activity, which focus on physical pleasure without necessarily including emotional bonding or long-term commitment". As I've said, it's disgusting.  Up until now, I still don't get how people can separate physical pleasure from emotional bonding. (Writer's middle of the post note: This is me again ranting. So no hate.)

How?? (Seriously, I don't know so this will all be just questions.)

Someone tell me, how can you provide passion to love-making, the light touches, the hot kisses, the smooth strokes of hands, the warmth of bodies touching, the emotion brought by an eye contact, if your heart is cold? How can such beautiful bonding happen with the thought of just getting through the night? How can anybody do it and forget such event the day after? How can you forget the face of the person whom you just spent a night (or day?) making love with? (you don't need to answer this if you were just drunk that day, you may excuse yourself) How can you ignore the feeling of intimacy you just shared with that someone? And if you choose to sleep with someone, I believe you have to be attracted first to initiate any intimacy, so how can you just keep the attraction and not let it to blossom into something deeper? Can we really control it like that? Just how does this society do it??

I actually don't want to know

I don't like what this society has become.

So, should I lose faith?