Will give juice for books

Bill Nighy

Hugh Laurie

James McAvoy

John Lithgow

Katherine Parkinson

Keira Knightley

Kit Harrington

Leo Woodall

Mackenzie Crook

Mathew MacFadyen

Matt Berry

Nick Frost

Paul Whitehouse

Peter Serafinowicz

Riz Ahmed

Shirley Bassey

Simon Armitage

Simon Pegg

Stephen Fry

Stephen Mangan

ao3 doesn't have an app because for it to have an app, appstore will have to approve it first. and if, hypothetically, ao3 needs appstore to approve it, it will also have to abide by appstore's pro-censorship stance and start banning dark and taboo fics, which is against its own core principle of being completely against censorship.

ao3 doesn't need an app. it works more than fine without an app. the reason ao3 can allow dark and taboo fics, the reason it can allow the most disgusting and shockingly vile fics, and be completely against censorship is because it doesn't need appstore's approval. it stands on its own as a non-profit organization with functioning site and a team of lawyers protecting its platform, its users, and every single fanwork on its platform.

everybody say thank you ao3

me: yeah, i posted on tumblr

publisher: .........tumblr?

me: that's where the gays are.

publisher: And what is your marketing strategy on... tumblr?

me: idk, i shitpost at 2am?

publisher: .....and it works?

me: depends on what the gays find funny at that point in time.

publisher: Could I have a link to your tumblr?

me: .......absolutely not.

publisher: I've been looking into tumblr, have you thought of using Blaze to promote your book?

me: NO

publisher: But it seems like an efficient way to get this in front of more eyes-

me: people on tumblr hate Blaze.

publisher: There is no algorithm and you can't pay to promote a post? I don't understand how anyone advertises anything on tumblr.

me: That's the best part. They don't. They can't.

(trying to make him understand that we do not control the attention. We just have to show something shiny and gay enough and if people are interested, they'll reblog.)

This is Cosmos, my publisher's dog.

He barks at my publisher's phone notifications. So every time a book is sold, Cosmos barks.

It's been days.

I think you guys would love to know that when you buy a book, a dog barks in Vancouver, Canada.

It's called "Runaway Brain" :3 Disney has a love/hate relationship with it because it's extremely beloved and held in high regard but also it does NOT fit their modern image so they can't promote or release it to any wide capacity because it would 100% terrify children.

Anyway

Shoutout to this Binface graphic for being hilarious, but I feel like we should also draw attention to the other reason Farage is (hopefully!) fucked. It's emerged that he apparently didn't know resigning his seat wouldn't end the investigations, just pause them, when he forced this by-election.

What that means is he can very probably be done not only for any financial offences, but for contempt of Parliament (when you interfere with Parliamentary business or investigations- Boris Johnson was kicked out of Parliament because he did that with Partygate).

And even better, if the investigations show he could have criminal charges brought against him, the fact he did that means that they could also potentially find him guilty of perverting the course of justice (trying to sabotage a criminal investigation), which is an even more serious crime than any of the financial fraud he's probably done.

And then, even if none of that happens, he's basically Streisand effect-ed himself into oblivion. The first thing you're likely to hear now after Farage's name is 'took £5 million from a crypto billionaire and £1 million from a convicted fraudster'. And he's freely admitted he took all that money and 'can spend it all on Ferraris' if he wants to.

Shoutout to this Binface graphic for being hilarious, but I feel like we should also draw attention to the other reason Farage is (hopefully!) fucked. It's emerged that he apparently didn't know resigning his seat wouldn't end the investigations, just pause them, when he forced this by-election.

What that means is he can very probably be done not only for any financial offences, but for contempt of Parliament (when you interfere with Parliamentary business or investigations- Boris Johnson was kicked out of Parliament because he did that with Partygate).

And even better, if the investigations show he could have criminal charges brought against him, the fact he did that means that they could also potentially find him guilty of perverting the course of justice (trying to sabotage a criminal investigation), which is an even more serious crime than any of the financial fraud he's probably done.

And then, even if none of that happens, he's basically Streisand effect-ed himself into oblivion. The first thing you're likely to hear now after Farage's name is 'took £5 million from a crypto billionaire and £1 million from a convicted fraudster'. And he's freely admitted he took all that money and 'can spend it all on Ferraris' if he wants to.

The noble suitors, who have never sewn a thing in their lives, sabotage themselves by their own ambitions: they choose difficult fabrics to work with and cut huge, elaborate patterns and select gems and pearls and beads to sew onto it, and snip such long bits of thread that they lose time detangling their stitches, and ultimately resort to pinning bits together as they run out of time, so that their offerings initially look beautiful and flashy, but when the princess tries them on they stick her with pin ends and fall apart as she moves.

The humble protagonist uses a very simple pattern without embellishments and sews using short lengths of thread (snipped off and threaded for him by little birds of course) which don't tangle and therefore save time. His dress is plain by contrast, but holds together and the princess is able to move freely in it, and so he wins the contest and her hand.

I particularly think about the bit about threading the needle with shorter lengths of thread, needing to tie off more often but avoiding tangles and thereby saving time.