What will you write?

Volt looks over at Lionel briefly as well.

"If we aren't all that different then I do hope they at least figured things out too... Can't say the thought of another person going through all... that... is pleasant."

He sighs and stands up to grab himself a bottle of lime juice... That hasn't changed either then. Volt still likes lime, so Eddie probably still likes cherry.

"Does make me curious how much you two may know from them."

----

Eddie chuckles slightly and purrs quietly.

"Yeah, I think you can learn a lot about medicine by... improper use... But, either way, I love who you are now, so you're past doesn't change that."

More than you may think, but Lio is smart. He won’t bring up whatever you don’t tell, even if he knows. Though, I will say.. he does know why Eddie keeps his sleeves down. He’s not going to mention it, and I won’t mention it further than now, but he understands you both.

He smiles gently, putting a hand on volts shoulder.

He wouldn’t trade it for the world, even if knowing more than he’d like does scare him sometimes.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Lionel laughs slightly, shrugging and leaning against Eddie.

"I... Appreciate you not mentioning it to him. I would say I would handle knowing that you know a bit better."

He pauses a bit longer. Thinking.

"I don't want to know of what you know of me."

He didn't expect either of them to tell him, but he feels the need to say regardless. Subconsciously he knows why. Consciously he just doesn't want to face the questions he doesn't even let himself know of yet.

"I wouldn't trade it for anything either, and it's nice for assurance in that."

He settles back down and sips the drink he got himself.

"Playing a bit of catch up with our other selves then, hm?"

He teases slightly with a smirk.

----

Eddie smiles softly and holds Lionel a bit closer.

"I would guess that taking a medication involves a middle ground."

He purrs quietly for a moment before responding again.

"I... Thank you. Can't say I don't have plenty of moments I had to learn to not let define me. I love you."

He kisses Lionel's cheek when he says that.

Don’t worry. Lionel’s quiet right now but his confusion was.. warranted. Although it seems Eddie has lowered his confusion a little. But, yes, it does calm some fears.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Lionel giggles tail wagging fast at the kiss as he nuzzles closer.

We can both learn to be better together, plus, I’m happy you’re alive too.. I love you too..

He relaxes, not even realizing he’d broken the fourth wall as he starts purring.

"Well, I'm quite glad Eddie was able to help with that even if only a little."

He seems fully content again.

----

Eddie chuckles and purrs more as he enjoys the cuddles with Lionel.

"Learn together, hm?... Anything with you sounds good."

He smirks slightly, but pauses... The wording.

"Lionel? You said you're happy I'm alive too... Which is lovely, but I... Did not say anything for that response?"

He's mainly confused.

[Ronnie takes a deep breath in, deep breath out. Her grip softens as she focuses on the motion of Qubit's hands running up and down her arms. It's unexpectedly reassuring. While it's not her first time having a crisis like this, she's not used to having someone talk her through it... She's not sure how to feel about it yet, but she might as well try and calm down so she can think clearly again.]

[She remains quiet as Qubit speaks.]

I would sure hope so. However, I can't count on sentimental value when the homeowner has kept me locked up inside this safe since the day I was brought here. I suppose that makes monetary value a double-edged sword, doesn't it? I have no doubt that the human feels that it's too risky to let me out, to display me in their home, or show me off to their friends, let alone wear me in public.

If I want to accrue sentimental value, I must convince them to let me be part of their life. I won't have the opportunity to do that if they find out I've been lying to them about what I am.

Even if I manage to earn said sentimental value, what will become of me when the homeowner inevitably dies or gives me away?

[Is it a good life? The answer is easy. No, not so far. Not yet, her brain helpfully supplies. She's been trying to get out of this safe for years -- and now that she's out of the safe, she's trying to get out of this house. But she has to believe her efforts will pay off if she keeps up the facade for long enough. Real Day-Dates get to travel the world, sit on the wrists of celebrities, be photographed for social media, and get pampered by collectors like they're actual royalty. She too wants to be a part of history, to leave a mark on the world, to be acknowledged -- and it all feels terribly unfair.]

It will be, someday. In any case, it won't get any better if I give up and admit to being a Frankenwatch now, will it?

[She grits her teeth, tensing up again. The more she thinks about it, the more the jealousy within her comes close to its boiling point. Realizing that her grip on Qubit is getting tighter again, she lets go and turns away from him to avoid hurting him, instead standing in a corner and rubbing her head with her hands.]

I deserve better than someone else's scraps.

[She spits those words out, barely containing her rage and bitterness.]

How could I live with myself if I simply laid down, accepted the lot I was given, and settled for this mundane, lonely, boring life I've been made to live? Dying in obscurity sounds far more miserably to me than dying surrounded by people who love me, even if they don't truly know me.

[Qubit's reassurances seem to knock the air out of her. It's not often that she's met with so much kindness and gentleness after revealing she's a Frankenwatch... her experiences have shown her the complete opposite so far. It's not like they would have anything to gain from pretending to be kind to her though, so she assumes it has to be genuine. Even if he doesn't fully understand her situation, she softens up just hearing his words.]

I'm not quite sure what I am. But thank you.

[Though she's been avoiding eye contact, she finally looks at them again when they start talking about being an ass. She stays silent for a bit, before responding.]

You have no reason to keep saying that, at least not to me. For the most part, no one cares for a Frankenwatch if not for its own creator, and yet you still care for me, despite knowing what I am, even knowing I'm unable to reciprocate. I'd say that makes you truly special.

That being said, you're encouraging me to drop the act. Are you not concerned about losing me if the human finds out about this?

[She sighs, wrapping her arms around herself, and tries to keep her voice steady.]

I have no reason to exist if not for humanity, and so I'm defined by the way they perceive me. If I want to be more than the collection of broken parts I was made to be, I must prove it to the world first.

"People find out if you're lying regardless. It is only a matter of time no matter how good at it you think you are. Maybe it's easy at first, to make yourself feel easier to be around or accepted, but lies like that are only temporary... You eventually build a web that traps you in your own attempt to escape the truth."

They take a deep breath after those words. Not wanting to think about what taught him that so clearly.

"Sentimental value tends to end with the person. Monetary value fades with time. But even if you keep the act of monetary value with the homeowner, what happens with the next person holding you when the homeowner passes? Will you still be able to keep up the act? What about the one after them, the next, because this act is something that will tire you, and even succeeding in it now does not mean it will last forever..."

"It will not last forever. Even with one person it will not last for every person... You do deserve better, you cannot change what you are, but you fight against it instead of working with it."

He does seem a little saddened when she moves away...

"You say dying with people who love you without knowing the real you is better than with obscurity... But is it? Is it better to die exhausted and having never truly known someone as yourself?... If they don't know you then you won't know them, because each person shows a different facet of themself with every person. You'd only ever see what they felt was right, not how they truly would be with who you truly were."

He pauses briefly again.

"... You are smart. Maybe that comes from your need to survive and read people and use social rules to your advantage, but you are. You are kind. Maybe that also comes from survival, but of all methods to do so you chose to be kind..."

"You are, I would say, more than you think you are... You are... Lonely too. You have people I am sure, but in a room full of people you know, you still feel alone, don't you? You can be in a room of 100 people you know so well, but none know you, and therefore it tends to feel like no one is there at all..."

"You pay attention to what others need more than what you need. More to others wants than your own..."

He takes a deep breath as he thinks again.

"Part of me cannot stand when people don't see how important they are as a person... Especially when it gets to the point they've hidden it in the first place..."

...

"I... Yes, I am concerned about losing you. But..."

He trails off for a few moments.

"Hiding from yourself, forgetting yourself for the sake of survival, making yourself purely for others..."

...

"I... Have lost people through that alone. I wish for that to not happen again, because it is the most miserable deaths I have seen."

His words come out strained with grief as he fidgets with his hands to regather his thoughts.

"Exist for yourself. If people are not going to care for your existence when nothing of your facade remains... Exist for yourself. I think you'd find existing for just the sake of you is far more fulfilling than any dreams of popularity, power, wealth... None of that amounts to learning to be comfortable with who you are. No love of your facade will ever come close to what truly feeling loved and cared for is."

His words not only come out as genuine now, but his emotions leak through the cracks of it. If he is to lose anyone, which he knows is inevitable, he wants them to die happy. Not surrounded by lies. It is a condemning fate.

Is that so? How are you so certain? You might have been able to see through me, but there are much better liars than me out there, you know. Counterfeits these days are so intricate that you might not be able to tell them apart from the original until an expert watchmaker has opened them up to look at their movement. I could have very well been one of them.

[Ronnie plops down on the bed, clearly torn up over what she's saying. A smirk spreads across her face.]

My only saving grace is that I'm the only watch in this household. Most objects are completely oblivious to the most obvious signs that I'm a scam simply because they don't know the first thing about watchmaking.

[She swallows thickly, considering what they're saying about value. He's not wrong, but what's so wrong with wanting to be someone, even if it's just temporary? Nothing she has is guaranteed to last, anyways.]

But I... No. You're correct. I can't keep up this act for much longer. I fear I might not have much battery life left -- and even if I did, it would be extremely unlikely for me to outlive the human. The truth will come to light soon enough no matter what I do.

[She lets out a sad, bitter chuckle.]

Perhaps I shouldn't allow myself to plan for the future when I have so little time left. Here I am talking about my next owner when I don't know if I will still be alive by next week... It seems like I'm only setting myself up for disappointment, doesn't it?

[Her tone becomes sour as she scrunches up her face.]

What good would come out of working with it? Yes, I am fighting my own nature, but aren't you doing the same? Surely you must understand, given your curse and all.

[She sighs. She doesn't seem quite convinced by Qubit's argument about not really knowing others or being known by others.]

Call me shallow if you must, but I respectfully disagree. Sure, I may be faker than most, but everyone's fake to some degree. We all do things for others in hopes that they'll do something for us in return, c'est la vie. I don't really care either way. I wouldn't put this much effort into this facade if it weren't because I want others to perceive me this way.

[Her eyes widen when Qubit starts describing her. She can't hold back a big smile at the compliment, and she basks in it silently for a while before responding.]

Yes, that's right. I had to be shrewd enough to survive in a world that deemed me to be an affront to nature. I had no one to guide me -- only my own wits and adaptability.

[She pauses, her expression becoming pensive as her thoughts linger on the next part.]

However, you're misguided about a few things. I didn't choose to act kind out of the goodness of my heart. It's part of the role I was given. The watch I'm pretending to be was a much better person than I am -- no matter how much I try, I always seem to fall short of those expectations.

[Still, it's clear that the part about being lonely hits her the hardest. When she speaks again, it sounds like she's asking a genuine question, despite the sharp edges in her voice.]

Do I seem lonely?

You must be projecting onto me again. A heartless monster like me does not crave friendship -- and though I make a show of being a hopeless romantic, deep down I don't quite understand what love even is. After all, a changeling does not have the same needs as the human being it replaces, you understand that, don't you? A changeling only cares for its own survival.

[Despite her words, her tone of voice betrays a deep melancholy, maybe even pain. The more she talks to Qubit, the more it sows doubts in her mind... She might consider herself a monster, but the parts she was made of were full people. Maybe echoes of the feelings they felt live on through her... They had loved ones, partners, families, friends before they died. Of course, she can't quite remember what it felt like to trust others, because even if she holds those memories, none of that truly happened to her, but she does remember the sting of rage and betrayal she felt when those people looked at her with disgust and turned her away for being some undead thing.]

[She shakes her head.]

I only help others when I expect something in return. I don't know about you, but that's not exactly what I would call kindness. Make no mistake -- I will drop the act as soon as it's no longer convenient for me.

[She glances at Qubit again, becoming really quiet when they start talking about death.]

I don't understand. How could someone die due to living a lie?

[She says that, but she knows full well she would not hesitate to choose death if that was what it took to keep up the facade. Still, she's curious about where Qubit is going with this.]

[Exist for herself... Isn't that what she's already been doing? Qubit is making logical sense, but those words feel empty to Ronnie, who doesn't truly exist as an entity in her own mind. She fully sees herself as some sort of empty vessel, a shadow of her former self, a shell of the watch she used to be. How can she learn to be comfortable with herself when she's incomplete? She does want to be loved and cared for, but she really has internalized the idea that the only part of her that anyone can love and care for is the facade.]

[Rising from the bed again, she steps towards the mirror, tensing up at the sight of her reflection. She frowns, her tone becoming bitter.]

I don't know how I could care for my own existence if I couldn't convince others to care.

[She stares herself down in the mirror, and though she knows it's her, it doesn't really feel like it. All she sees when she looks at her reflection is someone who died years ago -- but it's not her. Her body feels like a costume she can't take off... but perhaps Qubit has a point. She hasn't even tried yet. But as she stands in front of the mirror, it suddenly hits her: she's afraid of what she'll find if she tries.]

[Even so, she softens up when she hears Qubit is willing to wait for her until she figures herself out. It's unexpectedly... sweet. She couldn't possibly put it into words, but somehow that was exactly what she's been needing to hear this whole time -- it breaks her a little, and it really shows in the tone of her voice. She sounds tense, yet hopeful.]

Do you genuinely mean that? You'd be willing to wait for me, even though you don't know if you'll like whoever I turn out to be?

He motions to the scar on his neck.

"I still lie, but I let it go when it would no longer be temporary or serve a short term purpose... People don't particularly like when they realize the person they've come to deeply care for is nothing like who they know."

"And I have had practice lying for thousands of years. I've fallen to that web enough times to learn the hard way."

There's more hurt behind that than he is willing to share right now. He shares an experience he has at least already mentioned.

Qubit pauses when Ronnie talks about her battery life... Visible grief on his face like they have been here before. An emotion strong enough that they don't even attempt to hide it.

"Is there a way to fix the battery life issue...?"

Their voice slips a waver in it despite them trying to keep that even.

Internally his mind is just begging not again. Not again. They don't want this to play out the same again, especially not with what he is now.

They're different. He's better. They're stronger.

Not. again.

He tenses at the mention of his curse, mask cracked by now, emotional wounds open. The mention of Ronnie's time being limited like that was enough to properly break his resolve. They aren't deflated, tired, or masking. They aren't forcing the mask back, or gluing the cracks together, it's just gone.

"I understand fighting my nature. I do... I just don't want to hurt anyone. I-I don't... I don't hide myself to gain anything. I'm so scared of hurting anyone. If I get close to someone it just makes it all the harder to run away. This stupid fucking curse is more than just uncomfortable or difficult. It can be dangerous... I-I don't want to hurt anyone."

The smoothness to their voice is gone. The elegance is gone. His voice wavers, stutters, breaks... Nothing containing any emotion. Nothing leaking through the cracks that are far gone, just pouring out the broken gate.

He listens, lacking words until the question about dying living a lie.

"Themself... People die living a lie because they make themselves hate life in the first place... Never happy..."

He doesn't say it directly. But it's clear what they mean. Whether it applies to Ronnie in that way or not, it's a sore memory for Qubit.

"I don't want that for anyone."

They take a deep shaky breath and gather their thoughts again. Stop thinking about it. He's just overthinking. There isn't anything to worry about. It'll be fine. He'll make sure it'll be okay... They feel like they need to...

...

"I care about you. I don't think you exactly planned for everything to get to here. You didn't do anything purposeful to make me care. I just do."

He takes a deep breath and smiles softly at Ronnie. Sorrow is painfully blatant on his face and in their voice by now.

"I do mean that, yes. I'll wait. I won't go anywhere... Probably hard to get rid of me now anyway..."

[She's well aware that she probably won't survive if she can't keep up the facade, but she doesn't expect to her death to be nearly half as violent. Still, now that Qubit has put the thought in her head, she can't help but worry that the human might learn the truth and end up smashing her against a wall in a fit of rage or something.]

That seems... extreme. But I understand now why you're so concerned for me.

[Ronnie seems much calmer than Qubit when it comes to the topic of her own death. In fact, she perks up when they ask if there's a fix.]

Why, of course. Replacing my battery should be an exceedingly easy fix. In fact, I'd trust the homeowner to do it themselves, as long as they had the necessary tools for it.

Now, the issue is convincing them that I'm worth fixing, when it would be more financially sound to pull me apart and sell my parts separately. This brings us back to the topic of monetary value and sentimental value, I suppose.

[She pauses, processing what she's saying for a bit. When she lays it out that way, it doesn't sound as unattainable as it feels... But is it a good idea to let herself hope? What will she even do if she succeeds? She's been living her life on the assumption that she's going to die soon, so if she doesn't... she's not too sure what she would do with herself then. She's like to say she'd pursue her dreams, but she's well aware that those things are out of reach for a Frankenwatch like her.]

The Dateviators truly are my lucky break. If I couldn't communicate with the homeowner, I'd have no hopes of being fixed at all.

[She eyes Qubit curiously, observing their expressions. She might not be able to read what's going on in his mind, but the change in tone is too drastic not to notice. Honestly, it feels... good to be cared for like this. She isn't sure how to respond to their concern -- she can't promise everything will be alright, so it would feel disingenous to try and reassure them -- but it still feels meaningful to know she isn't the only one who cares about whether she lives or dies. It seems selfish to feel comforted by Qubit's pain, but she can't help it.]

[She huffs, looking away from him. She's clearly uncomfortable about something but can't place her finger on why.]

Of course. You don't want to hurt anyone. That's reasonable.

My justification for hiding may not be as noble as yours, I'll give you that, but I never claimed it was. I can't deny I only exist as a direct result of harm inflicted onto another watch.

[She sighs. It sounds like this isn't easy for her to say.]

You're a better person than I am. I've said it.

[At first, she doesn't seem to have much of a noticeable reaction to Qubit's explanation about people hating their own lives. After all, she doesn't want to die. How could she? She's clinging to her facade to protect herself... but is that really true? Again, she would throw her life away to protect the facade, so, if anything it seems like it's the opposite. She can't die because then she would be exposed as a fraud.]

[This thought hits her hard. And it shows -- her voice sounds choked.]

My life has never been better. I wouldn't worry about that if I were you.

[It's true, but it's... evasive. She's not ready to ask herself whether she's truly happy or whether she hates her life. Qubit is directly challenging the foundations that her whole worldview is built on, and it's not easy to process.]

[Her voice gets really quiet again after Qubit directly reaffirms that they care about her.]

I hadn't. I thought I could convince you to care for the act I was putting on for you, like everybody else. The more people enjoy the lie, the less likely they will be to believe the truth when it comes out, yes?

[Qubit's smile is really touching. Once again, he's making her wish she were more than what she is... Still, it feels like she can't express herself properly, and so, when she speaks, she sounds tense. But she approaches him again and holds out her hand, before hesitating.]

You have a good heart, Qubit, but I can't make any promises. Even so, I don't want you to go anywhere. Does that make me selfish?

"Okay... I-If I... Can help with that, let me know."

He's not noticable to the homeowner even with the dateviators due to how specific how concept is. He's not easy to find.

They pause at being called a better person that her. The silence that comes from them this time doesn't seem to really be him thinking, but more of processing.

He can't be a better person. They'll never make up for their past, so he'll never be a good person... He pries himself away from his thoughts and says nothing about that comment. He wants to argue against it, but doesn't want to cause conflict. So he says nothing.

"Even if I don't worry about that, I'm still going to worry..."

He doesn't press further about her happiness with life for now. They don't want to apply constant pressure... He could use a moment to breath himself.

They do notice breathing feels oddly strenuous for him right now, but of course he ignores it.

He never acknowledges the reckless self destructive tendencies he has. So as always. He ignores anything feeling wrong about himself.

"I'm not sure I would agree with it being harder to believe the truth in that case... Perhaps sometimes, but that is very circumstantial... It's not something to bet on... It tends to be scary either way. But it's easier to keep a truth consistent than a lie, and so it becomes easier in the sense you have more control... At least with control you're better prepared for what may come..."

They're rather quick to take hold of Ronnie's hand.

"It does not make you selfish, no... I don't want to leave, and I feel you deserve someone who isn't there just for your mask... Even if to just have a break from it."

The way Qubit holds her hand does make their pulse noticable now... He did not have a pulse before. Nor is his pulse slow right now. At all.

But you know, why would he acknowledge that?

Or you know, the way his breathing is ever so slightly unsteady, or the way he holds onto Ronnie rather firmly.

All subtle. He hides it well, but not in this moment it seems.

Unless you can talk the homeowner into replacing my battery or do it yourself, there's nothing to be done.

[She has no idea if Qubit does have any contact with the homeowner or not, but he seems pretty disconnected from the rest of the household. Not that she's exactly in on everything that's going on around here, being relatively new and all, but still. She hasn't heard of them from anyone else, nor have they really brought up the others like that. Maybe this is a good thing for her and her hopes that Qubit will keep her secret to himself.]

[She doesn't push the thing about Qubit being a good person. It was hard enough to say it out loud, and she isn't too bothered about whether they believe it or not.]

[She gives them a smile that's not meant to be patronizing, but still comes across as such.]

It's cute that you're so worried about me.

[Ronnie is able to relax as the silence stretches on. After how much Qubit pressed her to drop the mask, this is a nice change of pace. She does take notice of their breathing, but decides not to comment on it in case that's the straw that breaks the camel's back.]

No, it's not guaranteed, of course, but it certainly improves my chances. Social standing is one of the most powerful forces in this world, after all. If, say, someone of a lesser social standing were to accuse me of being a Frankenwatch with no proof -- his word against mine -- I could appeal to my reputation as an honest, dependable watch to convince others to take my side.

[She raises a brow at Qubit.]

Of course, the more people know that I'm a Franken, the least likely this is to work.

[She sighs.]

I suppose it depends. The way I see it, a lie can be anything you want it to be, as long as you keep track of who you lied to and about what. It may be risky, but it's not possible to have that amount of control over the truth, is it?

[In response to Qubit's desperation, Ronnie squeezes his hand tighter, and offers her other hand. Her voice is soft, and she sounds flustered.]

I'm flattered. I don't know how to let go of the mask, but... I must admit, I never imagine anyone could want me for all the parts of me. You're truly something, aren't you?

[She pauses when she notices Qubit's pulse.]

Your heartbeat...

[She seems unsure about how to respond to that last part.]

Ah, yes. Of course.

[She stops herself before saying something impulsive, however, and clears her throat.]

Thank you.

"I actually could fix it myself... I am a concept, but I... don't technically comply to the typical rules for what I am..."

His words are shaky despite trying to keep it together.

He chuckles weakly at his worry being called cute. By now they gather how she means it.

They're quick to take Ronnie's other hand...

"Something?... y-yeah suppose... suppose so."

They don't understand why they're feeling like this. It's happened before, but he never figures out why.

"Heartbeat?"

He holds her hands slightly firmer with a nervous chuckle.

"Why am I like this."

They mumble that more to themself. He tries to take a deep breath, but it doesn't feel like enough air.

"I'm sorry..."

It's unclear if he's actually saying that to Ronnie... or to just someone not here. They're crying. They don't know why. He takes his hands away and covers their face while getting up. They commented earlier that stress triggers their mobilities issues though...

Now he's just on the floor. He looks confused. And scared of something. All that talk of Ronnie running from herself was so hypocritcal for a person running from his own emotions.

On top of everything he's feeling in this moment. That fear. His own fear of vulenarbility. How much will he hide truths without lies before this happens again? What happens if it happens around the wrong person? What if he can't run? What if he can't hide? What if, what if, what if?

He feels angry at himself, scared, frustrated, sad... part of him even feels disgusted with himself in this moment.

First there was how they were before that stupid game. Piss off a god. Just go and burn down their temple, why would ever that go wrong!? How about even before that when he wasn't there for his friend! Couldn't do a single thing, now could he? Just sat there. Watched.

After the game was even worse, now wasn't it! The arson, the blood, what about how they— Ohhh and he wants to blame it all on his curse, isn't that so convient? Shifting the blame to something he says he can't control?

How about now. So weak. So pathetic. He can't even stand right now! They're just sitting there in his own mind! Can't even win against their own mind or body.

How many times is he going to fail to save someone? How many times is he going to regret his own actions with saying he could't stop himself? How many times will he be the cause for hurt, be the cause for loss and grief, be the cause for his own pain?!

... Qubit's silent.

He's at fault for everything. He deserves everything he was thrown. What other result would he get?

Is that so? Oh dear, you could buy me a few more years if you did that. You realize that, don't you? I'd be indebted to you until the end of time if you fixed me up. Please name your price.

[She looks at Qubit with something like concern in her eyes, but doesn't really know how to address it. It feels weird to see them being so quiet... She doesn't know him well enough to understand why they're having this reaction, but something feels off and she doesn't like it.]

[She stands there holding Qubit's hands, looking more and more uncertain the more he seems to unravel.]

Yes, heartbeat. Is that not normal?

[Her tone isn't the most tactful, but is there an appropriate way to ask about undead matters...? Maybe not.]

[She sucks in a breath when Qubit tightens his grip around her hands. This feels pretty intimate, somehow.]

[She hears them mutter to themselves -- and assumes he must be agonizing about being undead or about the curse. She sighs.]

You can't help it, can you?

[It might not be much, but it's about as reassuring as she can manage to be, anyhow.]

What are you apologizing for?

[Ronnie becomes more restless when she realizes Qubit is crying. She also takes her hands away -- and she freezes when he falls to the ground.]

Oh my god!

[She tentatively holds out her arms, while still keeping her distance. She doesn't want to startle him, after all.]

What's wrong? Let me help you up.

[She can't help but to awkwardly look over her shoulders as if to make sure whatever Qubit is scared of isn't right behind her.]

[She really has no idea how to handle a situation like this... She doesn't exactly enjoy it when people open up to her, but it's easy enough when all she has to do is look worried and nod while someone vents to her. This is completely different. She can't just leave Qubit panicking on the ground, what if they get hurt? It would be her responsibility since she was here and did nothing to stop it...]

[People say the golden rule is to treat others the way you want to be treated, but that doesn't apply to a situation like this. If Ronnie were in a crisis, she wouldn't want anyone to look at her while she's in such a vulnerable state. She'd much rather be left alone... but is that what Qubit would want? When he seemed so desperate to hold onto her?]

[Well then... what should she do? Or, perhaps she should ask, what would he do if he were here? What would... she do if her heart hadn't been taken from her? Go find help, perhaps. But is that really appropriate under these circumstances? Qubit may have trusted her with their feelings, but that doesn't mean she has the right to invite others to watch while he's having some sort of episode.]

[She eventually kneels down to be closer to his level. She does have some vague knowledge of things you're supposed to say when someone's having a panic attack...]

Qubit, can you hear me? Focus on my voice. Everything's alright.

Don't do this to me now.

...

"I won't do it again."

He mumbles to no one here.

"I'm sorry, sorry, I-I'll be better."

He feels like he can't breath. Their head feels so heavy. Their chest hurts, that one he's so very used to, and yet it feels so much heavier in this cause.

"I know I deserved it."

He's not making sense.

"I didn't mean it... I-I'll fix myself, I promise."

...

"I-I'll be pure again, I-I can earn it, I swear, I'm not evil, I-I won't be like them."

...

He just wants to be good. They never could live up to it though. He knew he never would. They were nothing like everyone else, scum.

Qubit flinches out of his thoughts when he hears Ronnie.

Do what again?

[She bites her lip, as if to restrain herself. It's not the right time to ask something like that...]

What are you apologizing for? You haven't done anything to me.

[She's not quite sure whether they're talking to her or not, but that thought only occurs to her after she's already responded.]

[She chokes up a little when Qubit brings up fixing themselves. It still surprises her how alike the two of them are... That's also a feeling she can relate to. Even if she's decided the risk is not worth it, the thought still crosses her mind even now.]

See, you are who you are. You don't have to fix yourself for anyone. It's their loss.

[Maybe it's not what Qubit needs to hear right now. There's a lot she doesn't know about them, after all. But... it's what she tells herself. It's all she can offer.]

[She sighs. Truth be told, she thinks seeking purity is a futile task, but... something about the way he words it stirs some sort of feeling within her. She shakes her head as if to get it out of her head, but she's still tense.]

[Deep down... Ronnie is also looking for some sort of absolution of her own, isn't she? If she can be perfect, the perfect watch, the perfect lover, the perfect companion, then... she'd be able to justify being here instead of him.]

[Her tone sounds melancholic when she speaks again.]

You don't have to prove anything. I'm already on your side.

[When Qubit reaches out for her, she hesitantly takes their hands in hers. She's not shy about touch or anything, but this still feels so... new and affectionate. She makes sure to hold him gently so he can pull away whenever he wants. Her tone is firm -- maybe her confidence will be reassuring to them.]

I'm here. I'm not going anywhere.

He's silent again, but they seem to be calming down now instead of stuck in his own head.

He's silent for a while.

...

Their voice is quiet and... Timid sounding when they finally say something.

"S-sorry— I... I... I don't know... I"

He sounds like he's at such a loss of words compared to any other point in the conversations.

"..."

"I apologize for reacting like that."

Why would he apologize for having a panic attack? That is something completely out of someone's control.

Yet the way he says it carries disgust towards himself...

"Is there a way I can make up for it?"

...

The panic is over, but there's still something he's scared of. Like they were taught this type of reaction is unacceptable.

The way his voice sounds smaller, the way their head is facing the ground, the way they make themself look smaller.

[She snaps back to reality when Qubit speaks again.]

Don't apologize. I simply don't understand what happened. Was it something I said?

Does this happen often? I'm always here to lend an ear if there's anything you'd wanna get it off your chest.

[She raises a brow when they ask if there's something they can do to make up for it.]

Well, if you really must, there is one thing...

[She'd do anything for it. And yet... the words leave a bitter taste in her mouth. Something in the back of her mind is nagging her about how taking advantage of Qubit while he's in a vulnerable state is a morally wrong thing to do. And she's supposed to be a morally upstanding watch.]

But we don't have to discuss that now. You need time to recover and perhaps some more water.

[She's about to let go of his hands so she can go fetch more refreshments, but she stops herself.]

"Bed... Please..."

He honestly thinks even a chair would hurt right now...

He thinks about what she's asking to know. They haven't even asked themself that... They just try to forget and act like nothing even happened.

"..."

He's visibly thinking.

"I... I don't..."

"When it was implied you may not live long..."

They don't say that with blame, just as more matter of fact about the topic.

"... I-I know you didn't mean it in the way they did, but... Monster..."

Closer to the start of meeting, that one word... Who is they though?

He runs his hands through his hair with a groan.

"Things feel foggy, I'm so sorry..."

...

"I-I can't remember how often it happens... I hate that it didn't feel unfamiliar though..."

Often enough for his body to be normalized to it then.

"God—"

He says that out of frustration and then suddenly pauses before taking a deep breath.

"They meant well... I was the problem..."

They don't seem to realize they said that out loud.

"I... I had this friend that... I... They got sick a lot... No one helped, I couldn't either... All I could do was watch..."

He actively knew there was a time limit for that friend. And they couldn't do anything to fix that... That's why he seems desperate to help Ronnie most likely.

"... I had gotten angry when everyone started bad mouthing them... I was already angry about a lot back then..."

...

"Pissing off a god isn't smart... There are worse things than death..."

There's so much he's leaving out. He keeps referring to this same group of people. And the mention of a god seems connected somehow...

They aren't filtering themself right now, but they still would seem to need prompting.

"Water... Water would be nice, yes... I'm sorry."

Make yourself comfortable.

[She sounds breathy, and she does have to take a moment to compose herself now that the tension is finally leaving her body. She places her hands on the wall and lets her head drop, letting out a heavy sigh. It's been an exhausting day, when her energy reserves are running low as it is, and she's not sure how much more can she take before she has to lay down for another nap.]

[Still, she composes herself and looks towards Qubit when he speaks. She doesn't make eye contact, exactly, but she looks in their general direction.]

I see. It was my fault, then.

[Even though Qubit didn't mean to blame her, she seems to automatically take it that way. She's not trying to guilt Qubit about it, but she says it matter-of-factly, as if it's only to be expected for a monster like her to hurt others without even realizing it. She doesn't even sound particularly regretful or torn up about it, she just says it casually, as if it can't be helped. It's just a fact of life, why bother feeling guilty about it when that's not gonna change anything?]

[She makes her way towards the chair so she can sit down for a while. She knits her brows, letting out a sigh.]

Perhaps. I don't know how I meant it. Who's they?

[She wordlessly nods when he describes his memories feeling foggy and his experience feeling familiar even though he doesn't remember how often it happens. That's how Ronnie feels every day... Still, she does take notice of how apologetic they seem.]

Whatever it is, you should stop apologizing. No amount of grovelling will satisfy those who hate you for what you are. Take it from me.

[It may sound harsh -- and, once again, she's projecting her own experiences into the gaps of what she knows about Qubit -- but she's trying to help. Maybe she shouldn't speak like she's an authority on the subject, as Qubit has lived for far longer than she has, but she's pretty confident about what she's saying.]

[She listens intently as Qubit explains, waiting until they're completely done to respond. Something about that last part seems to hit a chord with her, and she balls her fist over her lap in response.]

Is that really so strange? If someone started badmouthing someone I cared about, especially when they were unable to defend themselves, I wouldn't hesitate to retaliate.

Then again, I am a Franken. I don't feel things the same way others do.

[She pauses for a moment, tilting her head to the side.]

Perhaps that's hard for you to believe, since I've been nothing but helpful and kind to you. That's simply what I've found works best for a watch like me.

[In truth, there is very little that a watch like her can do to defend herself or those she cares about in the grand scheme of things. Since the day she was made, she's been subject to the whims of humans, shaped by the attitudes of other watches, and dependent on the approval of the objects around her, but who wants to admit they're helpless?]

You have my condolences.

[She narrows her eyes, trying to connect the dots in Qubit's story.]

Where does this god come into play, though? Did they have some sort of relation to your friend?

[Ronnie hums for a bit, deep in thought.]

Qubit, where do you come from?

[She perks up again at the mention of water.]

Why, yes, of course. Don't go anywhere.

[She hurries out and comes back with the glass of water a while later, handing it to Qubit where he's laying in bed.]

He turns to Ronnie when she says it was her fault, immediately trying to rebuttal that statement.

"No. No, it's not your fault... That wasn't your intent... Even though I had that response I don't consciously feel the same as how I... Internally? Reacted..."

He isn't sure that makes sense. They mean that he doesn't take it personally, but something out of his control still reacted poorly to it.

They tense at the first question, but answer regardless.

"... Family? Or... Village.. I don't know what to call them. They took care of me..."

The last five words would contradict everything else he has said of them... Yet he says that like he believes it.

They pause at being told to stop apologizing as well.

"They... No, they didn't hate me..."

He sounds sure of that, but his statements before would say otherwise of that statement.

"They just wanted me to be better..."

He believes that too.

...

"I-I... Maybe so... I found out they could have helped them, and they just didn't... B-but they said they got sick for a reason... I..."

He seems so conflicted.

"I hate that I liked what I did... I..."

...

"They're dead... Just proved them right... They were just trying to help me..."

He believes everything they told him.

"God..."

He mumbles that before properly answering.

"He protected us. They took me in and wanted what was best for me, and he was a guide. I wasn't supposed to question him, so I didn't. What he said was final... I ruined all that, and he condemned me."

His voice wavers again... He believes this too.

"I was supposed to be good and control myself and be better..."

...

"I don't know the name of where I'm from... We lived far away from anyone else..."

That doesn't sound good either.

I suppose not.

[She pauses, thinking about their words.]

I understand what you mean, too. I thought I was the only one whose mind disagreed with their body, but perhaps not.

[Qubit's answer makes enough sense. Ronnie doesn't know what it's like to have a family, or a village for that matter, so she wouldn't know how to describe it either...]

Others of your species?

[Something about what he's saying sounds off, but it's not like she knows enough about relationships to dispute it... No one has ever believed in her enough to want her to be better after all. She can try to remember what it was like, though before she was turned into a Frankenwatch. In all the lives she lived as other watches before, what was it like to have a family? Did they ever reprimand her to try and shape her into something better?]

[Well, there wouldn't be any need to do that to a genuine Day Date, since that's already the pinnacle of watchmaking. However, even when she was pampered, even spoiled, by her loved ones, if she thinks about family for long enough she also feels the sharp sting of disapproval... and so she shakes off the thought before she can linger on it for long.]

[She has even more trouble trying to remember her other lives, however. Of course her image was always important, as it is for any watch, and her family would have wanted her to learn that from a young age... Either way, she's fairly certain her family situation was never as bad as Qubit's, not before the incident at least.]

[She knits her brows.]

Of course, your family would want you to be the best version of yourself you can be. No one would argue against that. But if you ask me, the way they treated you sounds more in line with the way other watches treated me after I became a Frankenwatch than the way they did beforehand. As if they were trying to turn you into someone you're not. How is that any different to hatred?

[She sighs.]

Not that I know anything about family, nor do I care. I suppose we all do what we must to survive, yes?

[Ronnie scoffs at the mention of Qubit enjoying what he did.]

Why wouldn't you? They -- killed someone you cared about, and for what?

[Anger seeps into her voice. If she could get back at the person who did this to her, she would. Maybe it's insensitive to say it, but no, it's not so surprising to her that Qubit might have sought revenge and enjoyed it.]

Does it matter if they were right or not? The alternative was to let them walk all over you and your deceased friend. Who exactly decided that would've been for the best?

[Her tone is just as harsh as her words.]

Everyone in this world is looking out for themselves and their own. Why can't you do the same?

[Now that Qubit has mentioned how dangerous the gods are, she definitely doesn't want to risk incurring their wrath, but that sounds preposterous to her... When she responds, she looks away, talking to herself moreso than Qubit.]

Well, anyone can tell a lie, especially if they hold your life in their hands.

[Living at some unknown location far away from everyone else sounds off, but once again, it's not like Ronnie knows enough about living beings to dispute that.]

Is that normal for your species? I wouldn't be able to handle the isolation.

[After he takes the glass of water, she walks around the bed to go and sit on the other side, letting out a heavy, exhausted sigh.]

Surely you won't mind if I share the bed with you, yes? I'm absolutely depleted. How I wish I could be wound right now.

"No..."

They take longer to elaborate. They don't want to accept what it actually means.

"I... I never saw another member of my species. I heard about them... A lot. I grew up away from them, but I... I could tell they were close... We have good smell... I... I-I..."

He holds his hands together tightly.

"I rarely smelled them as living, and I never saw them... The-- The other members... They'd refer to us as dirty, monsters... They wanted me to be different... A-and better than them..."

He knows what that sounds like. They know it's true. He doesn't want to accept it. It's easier to not face that reality.

For some reason they automatically find themself defending those people, even if internally he feels so confused.

"N-no... They-- They didn't hate me, i-it was different. I needed to be better, even if it wasn't me. I-It was me... It... Just... I was supposed to be a better version of myself. Supposed to be good."

He can't help the confusion and contradicting thoughts leak through into his tone and words.

He falls silent again. They really and heavily have to think about the implications they have a right to have enjoyed it.

"... I-- but... I--" He genuinely and fully loses his words at that.

Qubit killed them, but they killed his friend, but he hurt so many, but he knows it wasn't the first instance... Was there any right answer? Were both wrong? He couldn't leave without a fight, he knows this. The scene and screams of all that happened linger in his mind, and part of him feels that haunting is deserved.

What should he have done?

He didn't question that before... The taunting in his mind tells him not to.

Why couldn't he be allowed to protect his own back then? Is it any different from being protective now?

They find that same internal battle of his god lying or not... Deep down he knows the god was. Deep down he knows that god was only after power... Yet... He finds it hard to accept just like every single other thing he knows, because it's easier to blame himself than accept everyone else was wrong.

"We were a social species... so no..."

He's so quiet right now, confusion and conflict seeping into anything he does speak aloud.

"..."

"It's your bed... I-I don't mind, no..."

They want to be held, they want to cry, they want to get out their head, they want to end the conflicting thoughts, they want to feel like themself again, they want to know who they really are, where they really came from, who his species really was...

They say nothing more. Just head held low and hands bound together tightly enough to whiten his knuckles.

I understand. I've never met other Frankenwatches.

[But then her tone becomes bitter, as she mutters something under her breath. The vitriol in her voice is palpable.]

Not that I would want to. That's disgusting.

[She gets back on track pretty quickly though, turning her attention back to Qubit.]

But that isn't the same thing, is it? There are other Frankenwatches in the world and I could meet them if I wanted to. You have no choice at all.

[As Qubit goes on with their explanation, she balls her hands into fists, letting out a sigh. She finds the people in his story seem to display an annoying lack of common sense. At least the watches she knew were sensible enough to steer clear of her, knowing what she was. But to be certain that someone is a monster and still choose to take them in? It just seems like a disaster waiting to happen.]

Why would they take you in if they thought you were a monster? They sound like nothing but hypocrites. What else did they expect? You reap what you sow, isn't that what humans say?

[At this point, Ronnie is clearly frustrated. Once again, it seems like she simply can't see get Qubit to see things her way. She's running out of things to tell them, but at this point, if he doesn't want to see the truth, there might not be anything she can say to get him to see it.]

Fine. Perhaps they didn't hate you but they still hurt you, didn't they? What's the difference then?

I truly don't understand you, Qubit. Why are you still trying to justify their behavior? It may be cynical of me to say, but surely nothing they ever did for you could have been as important as the time they let your friend die, yes? Let it go.

[Ronnie falls silent, looking at Qubit, waiting to see if he's able to get the words out. Still, she doesn't try to force anything out of them. She's said her piece, it's up to him to decide what to do with that information, if anything.]

[She seems confused after Qubit's assertion that his was a social species.]

Well then, how did you even wind up there in the first place? Aren't social species generally drawn to others of their own kind?

[Surely there must be some kind of connection between the deaths of his peers and the fact that they were raised by outsiders, or so she assumes, but she wants to hear what he says for himself.]

[She hums in acknowledgment. Yeah, it's her bed. She probably wouldn't take it too well if they didn't wanna share, but it still feels weird that he seems so comfortable being around a Franken like her.]

[She relaxes into the bed, making sure not to touch Qubit. It's a good thing the bed is big enough for both of them. She just stays quiet for a while, resting for a bit and saving her energy while Qubit thinks everything through.]

"I do not have a choice, no."

His tone starts to lose that genuine emotion they had finally started to express. Instead they start to sound more cold... Their hands still tremble.

"They took me in hopes of changing what I was, but I suppose they didn't think that through. I didn't go willingly... So I suppose they should have expected it to go wrong."

His tone returns to before by now. Carrying that unserious chaotic nature again, as if nothing he expressed before was genuine. Smooth elegance in his words returning too.

"There isn't anything to understand about me."

His words come out sharp. They can feel that sense of attachment forming, that sense of more than a bit of care. He can't let that happen. It's not worth the risk, or hurt, or guilt, or anything. So they'll push again... They don't consider the fact they can't physically get up to leave though, or realize their mana is too unstable to use in the moment.

They don't consider any other risks, or consider what he actually wants for himself.

"I don't think that was of importance either. Why would I care, after all haven't I said I don't tend to care for anyone?"

He's contradicting himself, but their words come out so certain and harsh in his attempt to force the lie to seem true.

"They hated my species, because they saw us as a threat to everything they believed. I just happened to be more unpredictable than the rest. They saw me as a weaker one of them all, but they messed up in that assumption... I'm sure they had as much fun killing my whole species as I did burning everything down."

Qubit smiles. He sits up again, forcing his hands to still and his breathing to return to normal and his pulse to return to the nothing it is meant to be in his mind.

"Social species are drawn to each other, yes. I'm sure you can imagine how it can effect one to have no one even before they could remember anything."

His demeanor shifted in a jarring way.

"I ended up being everything they tried to make me not be, and perhaps that is their own doing. Believe someone is a monster and I suppose you make them one."

He faces Ronnie with a small head tilt and smile.

"Would you not think someone like me is a monster as well? I wouldn't care if you did. After all, most people end up scared of me. They'd be rather stupid not to. Why would I try to be any different if trying never goes anywhere?"

Qubit's contradictions from before clearly stemmed from confusion, but his contradictions in this moment are attempting to undo any vulnerability he shared. Attempting to create doubt in how genuine he was before. It's hard to tell if their words now are true and his past words a lie, or if his words now are lies and their past words true.

It really comes across as possibly either. His mask isn't perfect, but it becomes hard to tell if the mask is there at all.

"You sound frustrated."

They say it so bluntly, and with false amusement.

"Did you think you could change what I was thinking?"

... Deep down Qubit wants to be close. Deep down Qubit is scared to be alone. Deep down Qubit can't bare losing anyone anymore.

On the surface they can't get themself to do that. On the surface they rather act careless. On the surface they rather push the people away the moment they start to get through to them.

In his mind he can't help but feel undeserving. In his mind he can't help but convince himself that nothing matters. In his mind he'd rather believe every single lie.

The lies of what he is, and the lies of what they should be, and the lies of Qubit being nothing more than a monster.

Treat everything like a meaningless game and maybe the reality of everything he feels will go away... They have always refused to see that mindset as what breaks him in the first place...

[She doesn't pay mind to the change in his tone at first, instead focusing on the conversation now that he seems to be making more sense than before.]

Exactly. If you play with fire, you'll get burnt. It's that simple.

[She can't tell what Qubit's thinking... She could chalk it up to Qubit being unpredictable because he's the concept of chaos, but she's not above turning on a dime for seemingly no reason either, since she doesn't know who she really is. She's just going with the flow. For all she knows, Qubit might not be lying, but their emotions might be genuinely swinging back and forth. Best not to try and call him out for it.]

Very well, if you say so.

[The increasingly noticeable shift in tone interrupts Ronnie's relaxation. It's a shame -- she was just starting to enjoy the new power dynamic between the two of them. She props herself up in bed to keep her eyes on Qubit.]

Yes, of course. If it's of no importance to you, then, I suppose we have nothing left to discuss, do we?

[The more defensive Qubit sounds, the more defensive Ronnie becomes as well, tensing up and crossing her arms over her chest protectively. It's weird how he suddenly claims not to care when they're only now recovering from having some kind of crisis about it, so she isn't too sure what to say... Maybe she overstepped by asking one too many questions, but it was Qubit who started spilling his guts out to her, so it's not like it's her fault.]

Now, it couldn't have been a reasonable belief if it required exterminating your species just to uphold it. How exactly did they expect to explain this away?

[When he brings up how being seen as a monster might have turned him into one, she mentally chews on that for a little bit. It's scary to think about, but she's only the way she is because humans interpreted her that way, isn't she? In a hypothetical world where all watches were devalued to her level, there wouldn't be any difference between them and her. Still... she's not ready to confront that idea, so she responds as neutrally as she can.]

Even so, for better or for worse, you seem to have a lot of faith on the idea that nurture overpowers nature.

[Qubit might claim he's unbothered by it, but something tells Ronnie it still wouldn't be a good idea to call them a monster anyway... He did very much explicitly ask her not to say that earlier. Of course, it's possible that he might have changed his mind already, but this might also be some kinda test. Perhaps they want to know if Ronnie would fold if given permission. It's best to play it safe.]

Don't put words in my mouth. What should I know, anyway? If you want to know if you're a monster, you ought to ask someone who isn't. Do I not I seem to be as scared as you think I should be? Perhaps. I wonder if there's a reason why.

[She says that last part sarcastically. Between her lack of heart, the certainty that she has already pretty much lived through her worst fears, and the fact that she doesn't know Qubit all that well, no, she doesn't feel scared of them. Maybe that's not a normal reaction, so what? That doesn't make her stupid.]

[She raises a brow when he says she sounds frustrated. She quickly dismisses the notion.]

Do I?

[She shrugs, knitting her brows.]

I don't know. I'm not trying to do anything to you. You talked to me and I responded because I have manners. Take it or leave it, it makes no difference to me. You should listen to me, though, because I'm offering you some excellent advice if I do say so myself.

[She lets out a humorless chuckle, before she leans back into the bed again, hands behind her head. She may not need other watches the way she assumes Qubit would instinctively need others of his species, but she too was completely alone when she was created... She didn't have anyone before she made it to this household after all.]

Yes, I suppose I can imagine. But that's not something that would affect me in the same way that it affects you.

[It might be a good time to bring her battery back up, now that Qubit seems to be stable again, before he becomes too relaxed and forgets that they wanted to help her.]

You still owe me, by the by.

"I don't think they ever had a plain to explain anything. Dead mouths speak nothing, correct?"

He smiles and takes a deep breath.

"Wouldn't a monster know one when they see one? I'd assume you'd know that better with how you say the same, hm?"

His voice sounds condescending now. Even if it is forceful on his end.

"You do, and perhaps that is understandable to be so. You spent a lot of energy and effort to 'help' me, and you got nothing from it, did you?"

That tone continues.

"Oh? You hold your advice in high regard for someone that seems incredibly lost."

He grins and chuckles humorlessly.

"Do I though? What part of anything that transpired makes you think you could demand anything from me? I don't kneel to anyone."

"I do believe that is enough of all this. You'd likely be lucky to not see me again."

He goes to summon his cane. It does not appear. His brows furrow. His mana is practically broken. He tries again, he can't. If he can't even summon something so simple then teleportation is out of the question.

His grin quickly falls as he realizes his legs still won't move either.

"What..."

He's stuck. Everything he just said, how he put it, how he desperately tried to push Ronnie away... And for what? To be stuck in a situation he just blew up?

His mouth parts slightly and he falls silent. His shoulders sag and his arms fall to his sides. There is nothing left he can do except be stuck with his own thoughts. He can't ignore reality in this moment. He can't brush it all off. They are stuck.

Not just physically now... They have nothing remaining to push away any thoughts or ignorance.

There's not tears, or panic, or anxiety, or heavy stress right now. But the silence feels cold and heavy.

Why did he do all of this?

Why did they open up in the first place?

Why did they care at all?

Why did they do all of that and then just attempt to throw it away?

Is this what he really wants? Is this what he really does every. single. time?

"..."

His mouth opens a few times to speak, but the words seem stuck.

When they do speak next, their voice carries no panic, anxiety, stress, anger... Just... They sound genuine, and regretful without undertones of confusion.

"I'm sorry."

[Despite everything, Qubit pointing out that she's a monster after they made a show of caring about her takes her by surprise. It really doesn't matter to her if it's an act or not -- being condescended to rubs her the wrong way and she's not afraid to let it show.]

[... Whatever. She never expected this to end any differently anyway.]

[She huffs, sitting up again. She doesn't hold back her sour tone when she responds, sounding tense.]

Surprise, surprise, not all monsters are the same. Perhaps my monstrous behavior seems normal to me, because I've always been this way, have you considered that?

[She seems indignant when Qubit insists, because, well, his reading of Ronnie is correct. She really feels like they're mocking her for giving them the time of day, for putting up with him when she could have simply thrown him out had she had a bit more sense. Has he been using her all along, relying on her when they need help only to bail as soon as things are good again?]

[She gets out of bed, standing where she can look down at Qubit while she rants.]

You think you're so much better than me, don't you? You must think yourself pretty clever, taking advantage of my kindness and goodwill like this. Fine. Perhaps I was only putting up with you in hopes that I'd receive something in return, but I'll have you know that's what all relationships are like. None of this changes the fact that I've been a damn saint to you this whole time even though you haven't done anything to deserve it. Don't act like a battery replacement is such a ridiculous request now. It would be a one and done procedure and then we'd go our separate ways like we both obviously want to.

[Ronnie lets out a heavy breath, seemingly winded by her little rant. Her words come out in a hiss.]

Shut up. I knew exactly what I was doing until you showed up and started trying to gaslight me.

[It might be a nonsensical accusation, but she's clearly trying to cope now that Qubit is adding fuel to her insecurities. Maybe, with a little luck, if she shifts all the blame onto him, she can push all her doubts aside and go back to her regular life, only more repressed than before.]

[She seems genuinely surprised at his audacity.]

What part, you ask? You cannot be serious! I could walk out that door any time and tell everyone all the secrets you've shared with me today, don't you realize that?

Fine by me. I don't have time to waste on the likes of you anyhow.

[Despite her anger, the tone of her voice becomes genuinely hurt. She seems to try to balance this out by turning her nose up at him, even if it's more for herself than for Qubit, as if to convince herself she doesn't need them anyway.]

[However... she's confused when Qubit's confident attitude falters. She stares at him, waiting for something to happen, until she remembers why he's even in the bed to begin with. She can't kick them out when it's like this...]

[She leans her back against the wall and remains awkwardly silent, waiting until they speak first. When he does, she sighs, looking away.]

Convenient time to apologize.

"..."

"Convenient... Yeah, honestly... It is, but not for the reason you think."

He speaks plainly now, not making his voice sound elegant and powerful, but also not wavering and choked up. This is how they really sound. This how they talk when they drop any act when they aren't a wreck.

"Even if you did tell everyone I wouldn't care... Whether that's sad or not, I don't know. I usually don't care if people hate me... I'm used to that."

He sighs and runs one of his hands through their hair in a repeated motion. They're using it to regulate themself, which they haven't let themself show that behavior around pretty much anyone. It's rare.

"..."

"You didn't deserve any of that... You... You were trying to help."

He pauses for a few moments again. Just genuinely thinking of what is right to say. He can't feel what she feels, but they've spent thousands of years learning what emotions present in situations, how they do, and what it can lead people to think, do, or say...

"I don't know how you feel, I never really know how anyone feels, but I understand what emotions can do. I get overwhelmed by own emotions and yet feel next to nothing about another person's..."

"I don't think you're a monster. And I don't even think of myself as better than you, I think you are better in some aspects..."

He takes a deep breath and taps the fingers on his other hand together repeatedly as well now.

"I think it's odd that I can get so scared of being attached to someone under the pretense of not wanting to hurt when they inevitably leave one way or another... That instead of doing anything to just... I don't know. My response is to push them away, because for some fucking reason feeling hated is easier than ever being loved in the first place!"

Those words come out bitter, yet not to anyone except himself.

"I fucked up. I think I do way too often... This is painfully convenient timing, because of all the times to be stuck, it's in a situation where not only can I not leave, but I'm also not in real danger, trying to avoid any sense of reality and accountability, and already trying to ignore every. little. fact. that I'm the reason I'm fucking hurting in the first place!"

He's just angry at himself. So frustrated... Because at one point is running going to kill a man who can't die? Sure he can't die, but they are well aware everything still hurts like it could.

"... I wasn't using you. I wasn't gaslighting you. I wasn't trying to gain anything... But maybe if you believed that then nothing would matter anymore and I go back to thinking everything is better when I'm miserable. I would bet you do the exact same thing from a different approach."

He sighs and just breathes for a moment.

"And I would bet I'll do this shit to a whole nother person even if you don't end up telling me to fuck off..."

"..."

"As much as I really feel like a monster... That's just a label people give others that they decide are cruel and evil... And not everyone is going to think that of you or me."

He tilts his head up to her even if they have no sight to actually make eye contact with.

"I am sorry... I mean that... I really have no clue what you're feeling or thinking, but I can still understand that shit hurts."

...

"Don't say you forgive me unless you actually mean it either, because you don't need to say that to gain anything from me... I'll help you with the battery regardless. You don't need to do anything, or care about me... Whether I like it or not, I do care, I don't want to leave, and I don't want to be scared of that. You don't need to do anything in return."

They are directly telling Ronnie that him caring is not transactional. That Qubit needs nothing in return form her, or even cares if she does.

Is that so?

[She doesn't bat an eye at Qubit's change in tone. The two of them really aren't so different after all.]

[What she isn't expecting is Qubit's resignation to the idea of his secrets getting out. Even if being hated doesn't bother them, how could it not make him uncomfortable to be exposed and vulnerable in front of everyone, even if only metaphorically? The way Ronnie sees it, the fact that he's used to being hated should only motivate them to put in a bit more effort into making sure they don't end up in the same situation again.]

Perhaps, but once those rumors get out, you will no longer have control over the way others perceive you, don't you realize that? You seem like the sort of person who's spent too much time and effort on the facade to give up on it on a whim.

[Ronnie keeps her sight on Qubit as he tries to pull himself together. She wouldn't have asked them to genuinely apologize, but when he does show concern for her feelings, it stirs something within her. Her tone of voice is softer, despite her words.]

Was I trying to help? I only said what seemed the correct thing to say at the time, all because I knew I had something to gain from you. I don't care either way.

[Qubit has a point, but it's still hard to see herself as kind when she's more focused on being seen as a good person than actually doing what's right. As with any other aspect of her personality, it's a front she puts on for others.]

[It's funny, now that the initial anger has faded, Ronnie doesn't know how to feel. The emptiness she's used to is back.]

I'm not feeling anything. No heart, remember? Perhaps that is of some comfort to you. There is no need to bother reading too much into my feelings, after all. If I am upset, I assure you, you will know.

[She feels things of course, she's not under the illusion that she's completely emotionless -- her blowing up at Qubit was completely genuine, for one -- but she doesn't feel them in the same way that other people do, or at least not the way she did before her heart was stolen from her.]

[A wry smile tugs at her lips when Qubit compliments her.]

That's right. You have no reason to deny my nature, however. Even if weren't a monster in the eyes of others, I'd be a monster to myself. When I have the body that I have, it's undeniable.

[She sits back down on the bed, keeping an eye on him. She thinks about their words for a bit, before she breaks into a smug grin, slipping back into the charming tone she usually takes on.]

What you're saying is that you like me too much. You like me so much that it scares you. Don't worry, my dear Qubit, we can take it as slow as you desire.

[She pauses for a moment and her tone becomes more neutral again.]

Are you scared of change, perhaps? I don't quite feel that way myself, but I understand that, for some, loneliness means safety. Getting attached to someone means you have something to lose. Not that I would know.

[Ronnie knits her brows when Qubit blames himself for their suffering.]

Are you? Unless everything you've told me is a lie, it sounds to me like those around you caused you pain and you reacted accordingly. Then again, it might not be helpful to hear that from someone like me, is it? What would I know about morality anyway?

[She hums.]

It's ironic, isn't it? You were the one who told me it was hard to tell where the mask ended and where I began. Surely you must realize the position you've put me in, then? For all I know you might be cycling through different masks to figure out which one gets the desired response out of me. I don't know what that response could possibly be at this point, but I have no reason to believe you are being genuine now, do I?

I did think something along those lines. But there is no way to turn back time, is there? It can't all simply go back to normal.

[She huffs at the insinuation that she might still tell Qubit to fuck off, seemingly in frustration. When she speaks, she stumbles over her words like she can't decide what she wants to say.]

Don't. You're--

[She sighs, looking away.]

It's not often that someone finds out what I am and decides that it doesn't bother them. Now, I don't know if you were lying about that, but...

[She wants to believe it's true. She doesn't want them to leave, either.]

[Though she sees where they're coming from, she respectfully disagrees. That may be true for Qubit, but she won't entertain the idea that the same thing applies to her.]

Perhaps that's easier for you to say, since you weren't born a monster. But isn't my existence cruel in itself? I'm a scam.

[Her expression falters, as she balls her hands into fists over her lap. She's not the kind to let others push her around, but enough people have drilled it into her that there's nothing wrong with hurting someone who doesn't have a heart... It almost makes it hurt worse when someone does acknowledge her pain.]

You care too much. In fact, though you say you do not understand my feelings, you seem to care more about them than most.

You might even care more than I do.

[She doesn't seem to even consider Qubit's offer for a single second. She sounds guarded.]

That's all well and good, but I don't know that I should trust you with my battery anymore.

How can I be sure you won't try to change me too? Granted, you don't seem like the type to care about money, but there are many other reasons you might want to mess with me. Curiosity, perhaps, or envy.

[Or maybe this is all a misdirection. Maybe Qubit does care that Ronnie knows his secrets now and they're trying to get her onto the operating table so he can neutralize the threat himself. That's probably just her paranoia speaking... but better safe than sorry.]

I thought we had something special for a second, you know, before you switched gears once more, and now I'm not quite sure what to make of you. I want to believe what you say, but I'm afraid I can't.

[A thought then hits her. Is Qubit fawning over her because they physically can't go anywhere? She sighs, frustrated.]

Fine. You don't need to do anything either. If you're concerned that I might retaliate while you're powerless, don't be. I'm not that kind of monster.

...

"I've never had a problem rebuilding the facade for those who don't know me... Have a facade in just the right way and you can make anyone doubt anything... Not a tactic I like, but not one I'm opposed to using. I can't take back that you know, because you have seen enough that gaslighting isn't viable."

They do openly admit to having used those manipulation tactics in the past. What he does and doesn't feel guilt for seems so misplaced and random almost. Guilt of his actions at the cult, and yet no remorse is heard in their voice at that.

"You were trying to help regardless. Is there something immoral about helping people in the hopes of gaining something? Because I would see helping someone as kind regardless. I think the aid itself is what is important..."

They aren't going to tie the want for something in return to a thing as immoral. As if he hasn't the same thing in so many other ways... Maybe he helps because the task is fun, or maybe they help because the offer provides something of use, or maybe he helps because to reward is simply enjoyable.

But when they do genuinely care for someone? He finds that he would do almost anything for them. He doesn't really understand part of him.

"... You feel things. I can tell that, and I also know feeling hurt is a rather easy feeling to face. You say you don't have a heart, but I don't believe that. Maybe things are just hard to feel, it can easier to suppress and ignore them, to shove them to side... And sometimes you end forgetting you're even doing it anymore..."

Which by now they understand he does to himself too, but understanding is different from accepting it and facing it.

"Seeing yourself as a monster is... I understand... But. How does your appearance make you that? I would argue a monster is a label of morals, ethics, and judgement. People jump to conclusions on appearance, but that makes for a label that is far more empty... Morals are often subjective, and that's what makes that label finicky and shallow, because it comes from a place of not understanding a person... Just instead jumping to condemning them."

They sigh.

"No one is a monster by appearance. That's a quick judgement, based on nothing."

They tense and shiver at that tone change. He really did not like the charming tone in this context.

"Please don't talk to me like that—B-but yes, I am scared of the fact I want to be close to you."

He finds it difficult to say they like her. Instead he keeps saying 'care' and 'close' and 'attachment' never truly saying the words they mean.

"I'm not sure being scared of change is completely correct, but that fear of attachment does relate to fear of losing the person. Especially when I'm immortal and the other is not. Losing them is inevitable..."

They sigh and take a deep breath.

"I guess limited time is part of what makes living special though. You only have so much space to be able to enjoy your life... Have too much time, and it feels pointless."

Goals form with no time limit, become forgotten, boredom is endless when everything is experienced, and with no end there is no need to do anything now.

"They may have caused it, but I continued it. I keep running. Which is hypocritical given everything I said earlier. I run from my feelings, I run from what I don't want to face, run from caring, run from understanding myself... I'm used to feeling hurt, used to being along, used to no one caring... So it feels easier. It started feeling safer to be in pain than to not to, because it's familiar."

He feels safe in what is familiar, but it's the pain that feels familiar in the first place.

"I don't expect you to trust me now... I want to try to earn your trust, if that's even possible now... I can say I'm being genuine, that I'm not masking, that I care, that I want to help for no gain... But that's not easy to believe now..."

They pause for a moment to form their words again. He does the same thing of calculating what is right to say, and sometimes they find themself hating that, but at the same time he knows it's not wrong, but can be wrong in how it is used.

"Knowing what you are doesn't bother me so much so to the point I can't even understand why it bother others. I actually can not understand how what you are is wrong. It confuses me... You're a person, so what if you look different, or feel things differently, or even think different? I genuinely can not get myself to understand how in the hell that is wrong."

They've been dwelling on that the entire time, the fact they can't understand how what Ronnie is being wrong. He sees nothing wrong with it in the slightest, and he genuinely feels so fucking confused on how it could be. She didn't choose this, she clearly didn't even want this, so how the fuck can others call it wrong?

He takes a deep breath to calm his tone again, but he finds himself frustrated at the notion of being born a monster.

"No one is born a monster. I don't think people even become monsters of their own will. People fuck others up and make them feel ashamed and wrong... You weren't a born a monster, and if you would still say you are now, can you argue that it wasn't other people's opinions that made that true for you? Why do you think you're a monster?"

"Because all I see is an echo of what other people decided you were, rather that anything to do with reality. What you are doesn't make you a monster, and wanting to gain things from kindness isn't entirely wrong, not feeling things the same as others is not immoral... So what makes you a monster then?"

His voice carries that type of care that sounds painfully frustrated in a way of wanting to truly understand so badly...

They take a deep breath and huff.

"I think people can care without understanding. I can't say I don't completely not understand either... I understand reactions, situations, environments... I understand the typical emotions that rise in those, and how people tend to react, and how their feelings tend to compound into more. I don't understand what it feels like, but I understand what it can do to someone..."

He understands the external results, not what the internal process feels like.

"I understand not trusting me with your battery..."

He thinks for a moment.

"How about a deal with it? Maybe you'd prefer me needing something in return, because I can't exactly get it if I don't follow through... I'll help with the battery, exactly how you want me too, if you simply cook with me."

They sound incredibly certain on that. Just... Just cook with them? That truly is all he wants. They genuinely do like cooking with people, especially since it isn't too easy to do on his own. He could ask so many other things, and yet that's what they choose.

Something of that request sounds desperate too... In a way that he tries to hide, so it'd be hard to chalk it up as purposeful too.

"I want something special..."

He mumbles that quietly. They heavily attempt not have those words sound so desperate that it almost sounds like he's whining.

They chew at their lip for a moment.

"I understand not believing me now... I want to make up for that, if I even can honestly."

They face Ronnie again.

"I want to help... I want to do things for you. All I want is someone to cook with and I'll help with the battery..."

There's a moment of silence for a bit. Proper silence, where the air doesn't feel heavy.

"I'm not scared of the fact I can't move or leave, at least not because of you, and not anymore now."

"... I trust you."

Those three words seem hard for them to say.

"I don't want to leave."

"And if I don't help with the battery. As you said, you don't know how much longer you have... I rather not lose someone I care about when I can help..."

...

I suppose so. Your approach might be more effective than my strategy of endearing myself to others and hoping for the best.

[She sighs, frustrated with herself.]

You may be right. After all, you wouldn't know my intentions if I hadn't told you outright. Even so...

[She seems to have a hard time letting go of this idea. After all... If she isn't a monster, then why does she feel so damaged and different to other watches? It feels easy to cling to an explanation that may sound a little cruel, but at least serves as some sort of anchor -- a monster is something she can be. The alternative is far more chilling to her.]

Being a monster is the only thing that sets me apart.

[She says it more to herself than to Qubit. Though she tries to keep her tone matter-of-fact, those words have a distinct weight to them.]

[Ronnie nods along as Qubit talks about her feelings, though she doesn't look towards them. Despite everything, that's not something she can deny. It's not that she doesn't have feelings -- it's that she's always been convinced those feelings don't matter. Whether it's because they aren't the right feelings, because she doesn't feel at the right times or with the right intensity, or because she's the one feeling them, it's all the same.]

Yes, indeed. I do. I understand if you don't consider me completely heartless because I still show some sort of emotion. However, the consensus in the watch world is that mechanical watches have a soul whereas quartz watches do not. As someone who remembers experiencing both, I can tell you it's true.

[She places a hand over her chest, where her heart should be.]

A part of me is missing.

[She then wraps her arms around herself, nails scrapping against her skin through the fabric of her clothes. It's hard to put the feeling into words, but her body feels constricting, as if she's been stuck into a mold that forcibly shapes her into... whatever this is. When she responds, she says it as if it's obvious.]

What is it that you don't understand? I was stitched together from dead people's remains. Perhaps it's hard for you to imagine since you are not the one who's trapped in this body, but how does that not sound horrifying to you?

[She sounds like she's going to be sick if she thinks about it for too long. Whether she's forgetting that Qubit also tethers the line between life and death or she feels like her situation is uniquely horrible is anyone's guess.]

[She sighs, knitting her brows.]

That's easy for you to say, because you never met me before this happened to me. I'm sure you would feel differently if I had been stitched together from parts taken from your son, your sister, or perhaps your boyfriend's corpse, especially if I were wearing their face and using their voice in an attempt to take their place.

[She huffs, her gaze drifting away from Qubit and downwards. She places her hand on her forehead, as if trying to keep herself levelheaded.]

I can't blame other watches for being disgusted by what I am. How could I? I'm a parasite, living in someone else's skin.

[She says that, but her tone still sounds bitter.]

... But, of course, I haven't done anything like what you have.

[She doesn't expect Qubit to bat an eye when he's clearly killed far more than she has. Still... she's haunted by the ghost of someone who was beloved by his family, by his community, and by the humans around him, someone who was a much better person than she is, someone who was killed just to give her life. Though she acts all high and mighty, deep down she's... well.]

I'm just a cheap, broken copy of him, aren't I?

[She goes quiet for a while, taking in Qubit's words carefully, as he talks about their understanding of feelings. She seems to sink into herself a little, still sitting at the edge of the bed, making herself smaller, with a defeated look on her face. Even that seems to make her more uncomfortable, as she's forced to realize how clunky her body feels, how there doesn't seem a position she can hold that feels right, and she lets out a sigh.]

You may have a point. Others have judged me for what I am because they're unable to put aside their feelings about my existence...

[She smiles a little when Qubit suggests a deal. That sounds quite nice, actually. The fact that he's willing to meet her where she's at, to make plans to make her feel safer, to work around her concerns... she's not sure how to react, but she really does appreciate the effort. When they say they trust her, her eyes widen, and she doesn't know how to respond. People trust the mask, usually, but knowing that she's warned him that they shouldn't trust her, and they've decided he wants to trust her anyway... it feels sweet.]

[She remains silent for a bit, before responding in a soft voice.]

You want to cook with me? Is that all?

[Her smile widens.]

He keeps it more simple, not wanting to push Ronnie too far, but all the same wanting to see if maybe she could see herself differently. At the very least differently.

"You aren't defined by what other people believe though."

Qubit had to break beliefs he was taught, and they still have to break more. He understands that.

He pauses briefly.

"You did not ask for that, you didn't even want that... How can something you were forced into be wrong? You're just a person as much as they were... I do understand the reaction people have to see the face of someone they loved who was gone on another, but... I don't see that as either party's fault. They cannot control that emotion, often people can't, but that doesn't give them any right to treat you as they did."

Emotions vs actions.

"Wouldn't consider you a parasite... You know hermit crabs? They need a shell to protect themself, but they don't have it from birth. They find one. Left behind from something before them. It isn't the best comparison, but... A parasite isn't right either..."

He tries their best to offer a different perspective, but it's almost amusing how he says it. Genuine yet an undertone of him feeling a little stupid with it.

"You aren't a copy. You don't need to be. No one is a copy of another even if they were a clone, because the experiences in a person's life is what makes them, not what they born as."

Qubit chuckles just slightly and a little smile, but seemingly so genuine, forms on his face. Her reaction to the request to cook seems to make him relax a bit more.

"Hmm... Tofu sushi. Can't have meat, and the plain veggie ones are bit bland, but you can fry and season tofu for it."

I don't know. You must understand, since I'm made out of parts from different watches, I can't help but wonder what makes me me. Where do they end and where do I begin? Is it even possible to draw a line between us when I have such overlap with each and every one of them?

[The idea of just letting herself be without putting any labels on herself makes her uncomfortable... What's she supposed to do with herself if she doesn't have some sense of direction?]

[She doesn't immediately respond to that, but the assertion that other people don't define her and that instead she must define herself gives her something to think about. Being an object, especially a watch defined by the name printed on her dial, she's definitely not used to that idea, but for once she's willing to consider it.]

I suppose that, if I ever plan on becoming human, I should figure out what I want for myself before then, shouldn't I?

[She says that more to herself than to Qubit. Still, she makes it sound like a chore.]

[It's true, though, this life was forced upon her. Who would she be if the decision were up to her? She'd be lying if she said she wasn't scared to find out, but part of her is also curious... Her mind goes back to what Qubit said earlier about how surviving isn't the same as living. She owes it to herself to at least try to be more than what she was told she could be, doesn't she?]

Hermit crabs?

[She grows silent for a bit, then glances at the mirror.]

I see. Hermit crabs can change their shell when they outgrow it, can't they?

[She can't hold back a smile at that thought.]

That doesn't sound half bad.

[She takes Qubit's words in as he explains that she isn't anyone's copy. She isn't sure how to feel about that, when she's never been allowed that grace before, but something he says really clicks with her.]

Perhaps that's the root of my issues. I have no life experience to speak of. Even now that I'm finally free to leave the safe, I only ever see the world through someone else's eyes. Quite literally.

[She finally looks over her shoulder to see Qubit's expression, pleased that he seems so happy.]

Tofu sushi! Fantastic. I must make sure I have all the ingredients we need--

[Something catches her attention, however, and she listens for a bit to make sure her ears aren't deceiving her, before her lips curl into a more playful smirk.]

He leaves it simple, wanting to trail off from the conversation by now.

"You only gain experience by continuing to live your life... Takes.. time."

Back to making puns... That smirk.

They pauses at that question though—

"What? N-no of course not!"

Despite their words they do not stop purring.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about!"

A figure suddenly appears out of no where. There was a sound of electrical sparks, and snapping before the figure stumbles out of thin air and falls to the ground.

They appear as about 5'2, have shaggy messy shoulder length brown hair, broad stature, soft but angular face, and their eyes have a rounded more droopy look. Their left eye remains closed.

They have a thick dark brown letterman jacket with a simple black t-shirt, and simple straight cut jeans. Their shoes are just casual red sneakers.

Their open eye darts around when they finally lift their head to look around.

They have no clue where they are, or how they got here.

*Their hand squishes against something cold and wet. A bitter fetor oozes out into the air. Their eyes adjust only to find a hollow socket staring back. The other, hidden behind a crimson mask in the shape of a rabbit, clings to their finger. Surrounding it, completely absent of a body, a human head. One which groans at the intrusion.*

"S-Sorry-- Where the fuck am I now?"

"Coolsville?"

They seem extremely confused...

"Uh... I was in Mangrove City... And... now I'm in some random person's attic..."

... They sigh and huff as they stand back up.

"I was just walking home, man this is some bullshit."

They aren't entirely surprised it seems, but they are confused.

"So... Who are you? I haven't seen something like you before, not that can talk at least."

“Mhm…”

*Shambling out of the darkness on hands and knees, a sallow, headless form. From its neck seeps a noxiously sterile, frothing substance. A nurse’s gown hangs from its bony frame. It hunches before them, sitting in wait. Every laden breath echos through its throat like some macabre pipe organ.*

*It’s stitches seem to disconnected where the lost head’s begins, their patterns a mirror.*

"Oh fuck no!"

They stare for a moment and take another deep breath.

"Ah uh... Okay.. Terri... I'm Alex."

They take a second to notice the stitching matching.

"Oh um... That yours?"

They are so fucking confused...

*The body’s neck jerks in what would be a nodding motion. As its outstretched hand is caught just under the light, Alex can see every screw that holds its bones together. When Terri’s head is recentered, the disorientation is immediate. Gut flinches from the light, stomach audibly roiling. Gut hunches into gutselves, every dry heave pushing guts vertebrae taught against the skin. It’s all the sights and sounds of a particularly gruesome hairball.*

*After what can only be described as a lifetime of discomfort, gut swallows back the rest of guts sickness with a nauseating gulp.*

“…I—I’m what’s left behind. I’m the parts folks want to remember. You could say I tell the history of those that can’t speak for themselves.”

“Well, taxidermy isn’t so different from other history, is it? It’s just putting keeping the pieces together, isn’t it?”

*As gut speaks the word the word “taxidermy”, gut scratches guts chin in such a way to rub the mask of a hare that conceals guts face.*

"You alright? That sounded and looked painful as hell."

Alex pauses and listens to what Terri says. Guts wording seems particularly interesting to Alex.

"I can see taxidermy as such. Kinda like pieces of a time and attempting to keep them forever?... I can get the history of ones that can't speak anymore, but from a very different perspective for me."

They think for a moment again.

"But what do ya mean you are taxidermy? Startin to think I'm not even in my world."

“Happens. Doesn’t hurt so much anymore.”

“All of the smart folks, they say objects have dimensions, you’re circles and your spheres and whatnot and such forth. Can you see it? Now, what about what all you can’t see? What dimension is our soul? What dimensions is our flesh and blood? Now you can. He’s here with you now.”

"Fair enough, been there... Yeah okay I am for sure in a different world." They sigh.

They realize that with whatever is happening here that there really isn't anything to gain from pretending to be an average human.

They do have to pause for a long time to process what was said...

"..."

"Uh... Souls and bodies, huh? Uh... I dunno how different it works here, but kinda get a bit of what you may mean."

They think more.

They may be stubborn about wanting to understand what feels like a bit of jumbled thoughts.

"I guess best question I got is; Who is he? I mean in my world souls do exist, known as fact, so may be biased here... Taxidermy's soul... Suppose I get what ya mean well enough there."

*Every joint groaning, he clambers to his feet.*

*Never taking his eyes from them, he leads Alex backwards. Even if never breaking eye contact means dislocating his head 180 degrees. There, in the shadowy corner, is a taxidermy hare. It plays dead, limp, a hawk’s feather inches from its chest.*

"You know... I don't think I've ever seen a person dislocate their head without help... Kinda wonder if I could do that..." They mumble that last part.

They look at the taxidermy hare and pause.

"Taxidermy hare... Are you like a personified version of this?"

Now they're getting it.

"Well this is interesting... Now I'm curious how this works."

Eddie leans into Remy's hand when he rubs his thumb against Eddie's cheek.

He takes some deep breaths at first they're shaky, but slowly they even out and he relaxes.

His heart rate settles again, and his body loses that tension.

"It was so hard..."

He leans into Remy, face in his neck again.

"I didn't want you to know that yet..."

His purring softens and slows.

"..."

He's quiet for a while.

"Almost lost... Four times..."

He admits hesitantly.

"I... Volt was there."

Only reason he's still here.

"I'm so glad he was... I'm happy I'm still here..."

He takes a deep breath.

"Got to meet Ari... Now you... I have friends who actually give a shit... I got to actually be myself..."

Ari must be who used to live here.

"... Fucking hell that... That wording. Maybe causes I lost so many other fights the thought of winning the worst one hits so much harder."

He chuckles slightly, a bit shaky still.

"A lot still hurts. Some things in your head just don't leave..."

...

"Ptsd..."

He thinks for a while, silent.

He's silent for a few minutes.

He takes a deep breath and then talks.

"... Some things I'm not ready to say still..."

But he would like to share some others still.

"I started this bar I think... 50 or 40 years ago. Time isn't something I remember well— uh... Wasn't very social, but I ended up in this friend group a few years in. Seemed good, but looking back I missed a lot of red flags."

He fidgets with one of his hands by tapping his fingers together.

"Notable context is that I'm trans." That he isn't scared to say anymore. "Which I didn't really accept until a while into that friend group... I... I trusted them... I thought it'd be good to tell them first."

He pauses again.

"Quickly became the joke in the friend group... Then a punching bag pretty much. Was scared they tell people, so I did nothing."

...

"Tried to fight back one day and... Grabbed me. Held me down. Beat me. Hell they set alcohol on fire after pouring some onto me... Few... Stabs, but kinda got lucky to live."

Those are where the injuries happened.

"I kind of just laid there... I don't remember how long. Couldn't go to a human doctor."

He's partially zoned out, wanting to say this, but not wanting to cry.

"I closed the bar, intending to just take time to heal, but... Alcohol started feeling like comfort... Pain killers never did enough..."

He pauses again.

"Wanted to feel anything else so..."

The scars on his arms.

"Volt met me during that time. In the alleyway next to the bar, drunk..."

Hence why they didn't want to say.

"I tried so hard to push him away, but he's a stubborn asshole..."

He takes a minute to breath again.

"He saved me a few times, god he'd watch me for weeks or months after... Really did almost did lose one time... You know how ancient dragon blog can make you immortal? Heals you first."

... Implications are there.

"I think that's when I really snapped out of it... Seeing the way Volt was looking at me in that moment."

He takes a deep breath.

"Sure as hell wasn't linear, but slowly got through that all. I don't drink alcohol at all anymore. No use in painkillers when they don't even work now, so same deal... Volt was there for me when I actually accepted being trans back then, helped me when I transitioned..."

He smiles softly now, actually at better memories.

"God, fell in love at some point... Still some things happened, pretty sure we get anxious as fuck when we can't see the other now."

"Both of us moved into my loft eventually. Got married early december..."

...

"Sudden noise scare the shit outta me because of a lot of that. Get scared of being attached to someone, scared of loving someone... Gotten better... Shattering glass specifically gets to me. Smell of burned meat..."

{his red eyes glowing with his dark black sclera..}

“I’ll kill them..”

{He mutters, his tails swaying dangerously, as if the thought of someone being the cause of Eddie’s pain is hurting him!}

{He growls against Eddie’s neck}

"No."

... He says it sternly.

"Chasing the people who hurt me only makes it feel like I'm not moving on. Thinking about them and the hurt rather than moving forward... I certainly didn't get to where I am today by constantly thinking about that. I did at first... But was never helpful."

He purrs quietly, humming softly, a tune that feels familiar to himself, something he's hummed so often it comes naturally.

...

"And I'm here now. I'm okay. I'm safe... If anything the best way to spite them was moving on... Proves them wrong."

“Your pack left you! Tortured you!”

{Remy.. didn’t seem like he was just talking about Eddie anymore}

He connects the dots here after the few bits in conversations.

"..."

"I have Volt. I had Ari too for a while. I have new friends that make me feel safe... I have you."

He has a new pack so to speak.

"..."

"We won't leave you either... We want you to feel safe too, you know?"

'We.' He refers to Volt as well. They're kind of a package deal.

"It's okay."

{Remy admits, shakily}

“You’re so gently.. so- so brave”

"... Okay, I have one thing I'll ask for right now then."

He pauses briefly, looking at Remy.

"Do it scared... Because part of it will always seem scary. More often than not you can't get past the fear until you do scared."

He smiles softly at Remy.

"You deserve more than you think you do, spark."

“Okay…”

{Remy grows silent}

Volt stays there, still having the two of them pulled onto his lap. He gently cards his hand through Eddie's hair.

If Remy still doesn't up in half an hour Eddie would end up falling asleep. He feels exhausted from all the emotions, but also feels safe enough with Remy to not push himself to stay awake.

Volt smiles softly and looks at Remy.

"He feels safe with you. He doesn't like sleeping around others unless he feels safe with them."

“I’m going to screw this all up yknow?”

{Remy murmurs into Eddie’s hair}

"I think you'll be quite alright... I like to observe how someone treats Eddie before I decide on anything with them."

And he seems comfortable having Remy around.

"I can tell you care for one. You helped me get Eddie back despite the fact he was your bounty. The little thing of swapping plates, the concern... Maybe you get angry on his behalf, but I do too sometimes."

He pauses briefly.

“Thank you Chér… I’ll.. try my best to be good for you and Eddie”

{Remy sighs and looks back up at Volt}

He smiles softly, and then chuckles slightly at the question.

"We're polyamorous. We're perfectly okay being with multiple people. Just that we're both aware and on the same page... Do consider us a package deal though, but perhaps that may take longer~"

That was genuine flirting from him this time.

"Ari actually... Was our wife... Or well didn't quite get that chance. She deserves that title though."

They've had a third in the past.

"I'm not jealous though. Perhaps a little possessive at times, but not jealous."

He smiles a bit more with an idea.

"Hmmm... Could I pet your ears this time?~"

“Sure- you can touch my ears”

{His tails wagging quickly, brushing against Eddie from time to time}

"Even better, hm?~"

He smirks slightly.

"Quite lovely to have you as well then, dear~"

His voice comes out quite smooth, though certainly still partially a mask. Weirdly enough that becomes a bit more obvious now. He's constantly masking, perhaps it even feel natural to him at this point.

"Hmmm... Sure enough~"

He chuckles slightly.

"I'm plenty sure we still have a good bit to learn of each other, but I feel plenty happy to have you here."

{Remy looks up with his eyes, meeting Volts eyes through his slightly messy hair}

“Got any hobbies? You’ the host at the bar, yes?”

"... Sewing. That is primarily my hobby. I do host the bar, yes."

He looks back at Remy as well.

"Quite like makeup too."

For Eddie being vulnerable was primarily his past, and for Volt he seems hesitant to simply talk about only himself.

{Remy notices the hesitancy, but doesn’t comment. Not yet anyways. He will just keep the questions simple}

“Fixin’ or anything when it comes to clothes, I’m clueless about, the last time I tried to alter something manually”

{He gestures to the messy cut tank top he is wearing- despite it looking good with the jagged cut on the bottom to make it a cropped top}

But he stopped for some reason.

"I would say altering clothes doesn't require sewing. Off shoulder shirts are just cutting the collar off the shirt, no sewing. It's not too uncommon for people to make crop tops by cutting part of the shirt off either..."

He pauses for a moment.

"I like uh making dresses the most. I don't tend to show them though. Just to Eddie."

Volt notices the way Remy talks here.

He hums for a moment in thought.

"Hmm, maybe we could do each other's makeup at some point? I'd like to see how you do yours, and you mentioned not doing natural looks. Thought I could show you that too?"

“And I’d love to learn about your style of makeup too”

He's partly thinking aloud right now.

"Do you have a preference for foundation type? Concealer and stuff too. I like the contour sticks, I don't like powder for most things though."

He seems to know a lot about makeup... Even rambling about it a tad.

"I like the liquid or gel eyeliners, Liquid gets the sharpest lines, but is easier to mess up. You should wait for it to dry before removing it though to not..."

He trails off after realizing he was rambling.

Eddie leans into Remy's hand when he rubs his thumb against Eddie's cheek.

He takes some deep breaths at first they're shaky, but slowly they even out and he relaxes.

His heart rate settles again, and his body loses that tension.

"It was so hard..."

He leans into Remy, face in his neck again.

"I didn't want you to know that yet..."

His purring softens and slows.

"..."

He's quiet for a while.

"Almost lost... Four times..."

He admits hesitantly.

"I... Volt was there."

Only reason he's still here.

"I'm so glad he was... I'm happy I'm still here..."

He takes a deep breath.

"Got to meet Ari... Now you... I have friends who actually give a shit... I got to actually be myself..."

Ari must be who used to live here.

"... Fucking hell that... That wording. Maybe causes I lost so many other fights the thought of winning the worst one hits so much harder."

He chuckles slightly, a bit shaky still.

"A lot still hurts. Some things in your head just don't leave..."

...

"Ptsd..."

He thinks for a while, silent.

He's silent for a few minutes.

He takes a deep breath and then talks.

"... Some things I'm not ready to say still..."

But he would like to share some others still.

"I started this bar I think... 50 or 40 years ago. Time isn't something I remember well— uh... Wasn't very social, but I ended up in this friend group a few years in. Seemed good, but looking back I missed a lot of red flags."

He fidgets with one of his hands by tapping his fingers together.

"Notable context is that I'm trans." That he isn't scared to say anymore. "Which I didn't really accept until a while into that friend group... I... I trusted them... I thought it'd be good to tell them first."

He pauses again.

"Quickly became the joke in the friend group... Then a punching bag pretty much. Was scared they tell people, so I did nothing."

...

"Tried to fight back one day and... Grabbed me. Held me down. Beat me. Hell they set alcohol on fire after pouring some onto me... Few... Stabs, but kinda got lucky to live."

Those are where the injuries happened.

"I kind of just laid there... I don't remember how long. Couldn't go to a human doctor."

He's partially zoned out, wanting to say this, but not wanting to cry.

"I closed the bar, intending to just take time to heal, but... Alcohol started feeling like comfort... Pain killers never did enough..."

He pauses again.

"Wanted to feel anything else so..."

The scars on his arms.

"Volt met me during that time. In the alleyway next to the bar, drunk..."

Hence why they didn't want to say.

"I tried so hard to push him away, but he's a stubborn asshole..."

He takes a minute to breath again.

"He saved me a few times, god he'd watch me for weeks or months after... Really did almost did lose one time... You know how ancient dragon blog can make you immortal? Heals you first."

... Implications are there.

"I think that's when I really snapped out of it... Seeing the way Volt was looking at me in that moment."

He takes a deep breath.

"Sure as hell wasn't linear, but slowly got through that all. I don't drink alcohol at all anymore. No use in painkillers when they don't even work now, so same deal... Volt was there for me when I actually accepted being trans back then, helped me when I transitioned..."

He smiles softly now, actually at better memories.

"God, fell in love at some point... Still some things happened, pretty sure we get anxious as fuck when we can't see the other now."

"Both of us moved into my loft eventually. Got married early december..."

...

"Sudden noise scare the shit outta me because of a lot of that. Get scared of being attached to someone, scared of loving someone... Gotten better... Shattering glass specifically gets to me. Smell of burned meat..."

{his red eyes glowing with his dark black sclera..}

“I’ll kill them..”

{He mutters, his tails swaying dangerously, as if the thought of someone being the cause of Eddie’s pain is hurting him!}

{He growls against Eddie’s neck}

"No."

... He says it sternly.

"Chasing the people who hurt me only makes it feel like I'm not moving on. Thinking about them and the hurt rather than moving forward... I certainly didn't get to where I am today by constantly thinking about that. I did at first... But was never helpful."

He purrs quietly, humming softly, a tune that feels familiar to himself, something he's hummed so often it comes naturally.

...

"And I'm here now. I'm okay. I'm safe... If anything the best way to spite them was moving on... Proves them wrong."

“Your pack left you! Tortured you!”

{Remy.. didn’t seem like he was just talking about Eddie anymore}

He connects the dots here after the few bits in conversations.

"..."

"I have Volt. I had Ari too for a while. I have new friends that make me feel safe... I have you."

He has a new pack so to speak.

"..."

"We won't leave you either... We want you to feel safe too, you know?"

'We.' He refers to Volt as well. They're kind of a package deal.

"It's okay."

{Remy admits, shakily}

“You’re so gently.. so- so brave”

"... Okay, I have one thing I'll ask for right now then."

He pauses briefly, looking at Remy.

"Do it scared... Because part of it will always seem scary. More often than not you can't get past the fear until you do scared."

He smiles softly at Remy.

"You deserve more than you think you do, spark."

“Okay…”

{Remy grows silent}

Volt stays there, still having the two of them pulled onto his lap. He gently cards his hand through Eddie's hair.

If Remy still doesn't up in half an hour Eddie would end up falling asleep. He feels exhausted from all the emotions, but also feels safe enough with Remy to not push himself to stay awake.

Volt smiles softly and looks at Remy.

"He feels safe with you. He doesn't like sleeping around others unless he feels safe with them."

“I’m going to screw this all up yknow?”

{Remy murmurs into Eddie’s hair}

"I think you'll be quite alright... I like to observe how someone treats Eddie before I decide on anything with them."

And he seems comfortable having Remy around.

"I can tell you care for one. You helped me get Eddie back despite the fact he was your bounty. The little thing of swapping plates, the concern... Maybe you get angry on his behalf, but I do too sometimes."

He pauses briefly.

“Thank you Chér… I’ll.. try my best to be good for you and Eddie”

{Remy sighs and looks back up at Volt}

He smiles softly, and then chuckles slightly at the question.

"We're polyamorous. We're perfectly okay being with multiple people. Just that we're both aware and on the same page... Do consider us a package deal though, but perhaps that may take longer~"

That was genuine flirting from him this time.

"Ari actually... Was our wife... Or well didn't quite get that chance. She deserves that title though."

They've had a third in the past.

"I'm not jealous though. Perhaps a little possessive at times, but not jealous."

He smiles a bit more with an idea.

"Hmmm... Could I pet your ears this time?~"

“Sure- you can touch my ears”

{His tails wagging quickly, brushing against Eddie from time to time}

"Even better, hm?~"

He smirks slightly.

"Quite lovely to have you as well then, dear~"

His voice comes out quite smooth, though certainly still partially a mask. Weirdly enough that becomes a bit more obvious now. He's constantly masking, perhaps it even feel natural to him at this point.

"Hmmm... Sure enough~"

He chuckles slightly.

"I'm plenty sure we still have a good bit to learn of each other, but I feel plenty happy to have you here."

{Remy looks up with his eyes, meeting Volts eyes through his slightly messy hair}

“Got any hobbies? You’ the host at the bar, yes?”

"... Sewing. That is primarily my hobby. I do host the bar, yes."

He looks back at Remy as well.

"Quite like makeup too."

For Eddie being vulnerable was primarily his past, and for Volt he seems hesitant to simply talk about only himself.

{Remy notices the hesitancy, but doesn’t comment. Not yet anyways. He will just keep the questions simple}

“Fixin’ or anything when it comes to clothes, I’m clueless about, the last time I tried to alter something manually”

{He gestures to the messy cut tank top he is wearing- despite it looking good with the jagged cut on the bottom to make it a cropped top}

But he stopped for some reason.

"I would say altering clothes doesn't require sewing. Off shoulder shirts are just cutting the collar off the shirt, no sewing. It's not too uncommon for people to make crop tops by cutting part of the shirt off either..."

He pauses for a moment.

"I like uh making dresses the most. I don't tend to show them though. Just to Eddie."

Volt notices the way Remy talks here.

He hums for a moment in thought.

"Hmm, maybe we could do each other's makeup at some point? I'd like to see how you do yours, and you mentioned not doing natural looks. Thought I could show you that too?"

Eddie leans into Remy's hand when he rubs his thumb against Eddie's cheek.

He takes some deep breaths at first they're shaky, but slowly they even out and he relaxes.

His heart rate settles again, and his body loses that tension.

"It was so hard..."

He leans into Remy, face in his neck again.

"I didn't want you to know that yet..."

His purring softens and slows.

"..."

He's quiet for a while.

"Almost lost... Four times..."

He admits hesitantly.

"I... Volt was there."

Only reason he's still here.

"I'm so glad he was... I'm happy I'm still here..."

He takes a deep breath.

"Got to meet Ari... Now you... I have friends who actually give a shit... I got to actually be myself..."

Ari must be who used to live here.

"... Fucking hell that... That wording. Maybe causes I lost so many other fights the thought of winning the worst one hits so much harder."

He chuckles slightly, a bit shaky still.

"A lot still hurts. Some things in your head just don't leave..."

...

"Ptsd..."

He thinks for a while, silent.

He's silent for a few minutes.

He takes a deep breath and then talks.

"... Some things I'm not ready to say still..."

But he would like to share some others still.

"I started this bar I think... 50 or 40 years ago. Time isn't something I remember well— uh... Wasn't very social, but I ended up in this friend group a few years in. Seemed good, but looking back I missed a lot of red flags."

He fidgets with one of his hands by tapping his fingers together.

"Notable context is that I'm trans." That he isn't scared to say anymore. "Which I didn't really accept until a while into that friend group... I... I trusted them... I thought it'd be good to tell them first."

He pauses again.

"Quickly became the joke in the friend group... Then a punching bag pretty much. Was scared they tell people, so I did nothing."

...

"Tried to fight back one day and... Grabbed me. Held me down. Beat me. Hell they set alcohol on fire after pouring some onto me... Few... Stabs, but kinda got lucky to live."

Those are where the injuries happened.

"I kind of just laid there... I don't remember how long. Couldn't go to a human doctor."

He's partially zoned out, wanting to say this, but not wanting to cry.

"I closed the bar, intending to just take time to heal, but... Alcohol started feeling like comfort... Pain killers never did enough..."

He pauses again.

"Wanted to feel anything else so..."

The scars on his arms.

"Volt met me during that time. In the alleyway next to the bar, drunk..."

Hence why they didn't want to say.

"I tried so hard to push him away, but he's a stubborn asshole..."

He takes a minute to breath again.

"He saved me a few times, god he'd watch me for weeks or months after... Really did almost did lose one time... You know how ancient dragon blog can make you immortal? Heals you first."

... Implications are there.

"I think that's when I really snapped out of it... Seeing the way Volt was looking at me in that moment."

He takes a deep breath.

"Sure as hell wasn't linear, but slowly got through that all. I don't drink alcohol at all anymore. No use in painkillers when they don't even work now, so same deal... Volt was there for me when I actually accepted being trans back then, helped me when I transitioned..."

He smiles softly now, actually at better memories.

"God, fell in love at some point... Still some things happened, pretty sure we get anxious as fuck when we can't see the other now."

"Both of us moved into my loft eventually. Got married early december..."

...

"Sudden noise scare the shit outta me because of a lot of that. Get scared of being attached to someone, scared of loving someone... Gotten better... Shattering glass specifically gets to me. Smell of burned meat..."

{his red eyes glowing with his dark black sclera..}

“I’ll kill them..”

{He mutters, his tails swaying dangerously, as if the thought of someone being the cause of Eddie’s pain is hurting him!}

{He growls against Eddie’s neck}

"No."

... He says it sternly.

"Chasing the people who hurt me only makes it feel like I'm not moving on. Thinking about them and the hurt rather than moving forward... I certainly didn't get to where I am today by constantly thinking about that. I did at first... But was never helpful."

He purrs quietly, humming softly, a tune that feels familiar to himself, something he's hummed so often it comes naturally.

...

"And I'm here now. I'm okay. I'm safe... If anything the best way to spite them was moving on... Proves them wrong."

“Your pack left you! Tortured you!”

{Remy.. didn’t seem like he was just talking about Eddie anymore}

He connects the dots here after the few bits in conversations.

"..."

"I have Volt. I had Ari too for a while. I have new friends that make me feel safe... I have you."

He has a new pack so to speak.

"..."

"We won't leave you either... We want you to feel safe too, you know?"

'We.' He refers to Volt as well. They're kind of a package deal.

"It's okay."

{Remy admits, shakily}

“You’re so gently.. so- so brave”

"... Okay, I have one thing I'll ask for right now then."

He pauses briefly, looking at Remy.

"Do it scared... Because part of it will always seem scary. More often than not you can't get past the fear until you do scared."

He smiles softly at Remy.

"You deserve more than you think you do, spark."

“Okay…”

{Remy grows silent}

Volt stays there, still having the two of them pulled onto his lap. He gently cards his hand through Eddie's hair.

If Remy still doesn't up in half an hour Eddie would end up falling asleep. He feels exhausted from all the emotions, but also feels safe enough with Remy to not push himself to stay awake.

Volt smiles softly and looks at Remy.

"He feels safe with you. He doesn't like sleeping around others unless he feels safe with them."

“I’m going to screw this all up yknow?”

{Remy murmurs into Eddie’s hair}

"I think you'll be quite alright... I like to observe how someone treats Eddie before I decide on anything with them."

And he seems comfortable having Remy around.

"I can tell you care for one. You helped me get Eddie back despite the fact he was your bounty. The little thing of swapping plates, the concern... Maybe you get angry on his behalf, but I do too sometimes."

He pauses briefly.

“Thank you Chér… I’ll.. try my best to be good for you and Eddie”

{Remy sighs and looks back up at Volt}

He smiles softly, and then chuckles slightly at the question.

"We're polyamorous. We're perfectly okay being with multiple people. Just that we're both aware and on the same page... Do consider us a package deal though, but perhaps that may take longer~"

That was genuine flirting from him this time.

"Ari actually... Was our wife... Or well didn't quite get that chance. She deserves that title though."

They've had a third in the past.

"I'm not jealous though. Perhaps a little possessive at times, but not jealous."

He smiles a bit more with an idea.

"Hmmm... Could I pet your ears this time?~"

“Sure- you can touch my ears”

{His tails wagging quickly, brushing against Eddie from time to time}

"Even better, hm?~"

He smirks slightly.

"Quite lovely to have you as well then, dear~"

His voice comes out quite smooth, though certainly still partially a mask. Weirdly enough that becomes a bit more obvious now. He's constantly masking, perhaps it even feel natural to him at this point.

"Hmmm... Sure enough~"

He chuckles slightly.

"I'm plenty sure we still have a good bit to learn of each other, but I feel plenty happy to have you here."

{Remy looks up with his eyes, meeting Volts eyes through his slightly messy hair}

“Got any hobbies? You’ the host at the bar, yes?”

"... Sewing. That is primarily my hobby. I do host the bar, yes."

He looks back at Remy as well.

"Quite like makeup too."

For Eddie being vulnerable was primarily his past, and for Volt he seems hesitant to simply talk about only himself.

{Remy notices the hesitancy, but doesn’t comment. Not yet anyways. He will just keep the questions simple}

“Fixin’ or anything when it comes to clothes, I’m clueless about, the last time I tried to alter something manually”

{He gestures to the messy cut tank top he is wearing- despite it looking good with the jagged cut on the bottom to make it a cropped top}

But he stopped for some reason.

"I would say altering clothes doesn't require sewing. Off shoulder shirts are just cutting the collar off the shirt, no sewing. It's not too uncommon for people to make crop tops by cutting part of the shirt off either..."

He pauses for a moment.

"I like uh making dresses the most. I don't tend to show them though. Just to Eddie."

Volt notices the way Remy talks here.

Eddie leans into Remy's hand when he rubs his thumb against Eddie's cheek.

He takes some deep breaths at first they're shaky, but slowly they even out and he relaxes.

His heart rate settles again, and his body loses that tension.

"It was so hard..."

He leans into Remy, face in his neck again.

"I didn't want you to know that yet..."

His purring softens and slows.

"..."

He's quiet for a while.

"Almost lost... Four times..."

He admits hesitantly.

"I... Volt was there."

Only reason he's still here.

"I'm so glad he was... I'm happy I'm still here..."

He takes a deep breath.

"Got to meet Ari... Now you... I have friends who actually give a shit... I got to actually be myself..."

Ari must be who used to live here.

"... Fucking hell that... That wording. Maybe causes I lost so many other fights the thought of winning the worst one hits so much harder."

He chuckles slightly, a bit shaky still.

"A lot still hurts. Some things in your head just don't leave..."

...

"Ptsd..."

He thinks for a while, silent.

He's silent for a few minutes.

He takes a deep breath and then talks.

"... Some things I'm not ready to say still..."

But he would like to share some others still.

"I started this bar I think... 50 or 40 years ago. Time isn't something I remember well— uh... Wasn't very social, but I ended up in this friend group a few years in. Seemed good, but looking back I missed a lot of red flags."

He fidgets with one of his hands by tapping his fingers together.

"Notable context is that I'm trans." That he isn't scared to say anymore. "Which I didn't really accept until a while into that friend group... I... I trusted them... I thought it'd be good to tell them first."

He pauses again.

"Quickly became the joke in the friend group... Then a punching bag pretty much. Was scared they tell people, so I did nothing."

...

"Tried to fight back one day and... Grabbed me. Held me down. Beat me. Hell they set alcohol on fire after pouring some onto me... Few... Stabs, but kinda got lucky to live."

Those are where the injuries happened.

"I kind of just laid there... I don't remember how long. Couldn't go to a human doctor."

He's partially zoned out, wanting to say this, but not wanting to cry.

"I closed the bar, intending to just take time to heal, but... Alcohol started feeling like comfort... Pain killers never did enough..."

He pauses again.

"Wanted to feel anything else so..."

The scars on his arms.

"Volt met me during that time. In the alleyway next to the bar, drunk..."

Hence why they didn't want to say.

"I tried so hard to push him away, but he's a stubborn asshole..."

He takes a minute to breath again.

"He saved me a few times, god he'd watch me for weeks or months after... Really did almost did lose one time... You know how ancient dragon blog can make you immortal? Heals you first."

... Implications are there.

"I think that's when I really snapped out of it... Seeing the way Volt was looking at me in that moment."

He takes a deep breath.

"Sure as hell wasn't linear, but slowly got through that all. I don't drink alcohol at all anymore. No use in painkillers when they don't even work now, so same deal... Volt was there for me when I actually accepted being trans back then, helped me when I transitioned..."

He smiles softly now, actually at better memories.

"God, fell in love at some point... Still some things happened, pretty sure we get anxious as fuck when we can't see the other now."

"Both of us moved into my loft eventually. Got married early december..."

...

"Sudden noise scare the shit outta me because of a lot of that. Get scared of being attached to someone, scared of loving someone... Gotten better... Shattering glass specifically gets to me. Smell of burned meat..."

{his red eyes glowing with his dark black sclera..}

“I’ll kill them..”

{He mutters, his tails swaying dangerously, as if the thought of someone being the cause of Eddie’s pain is hurting him!}

{He growls against Eddie’s neck}

"No."

... He says it sternly.

"Chasing the people who hurt me only makes it feel like I'm not moving on. Thinking about them and the hurt rather than moving forward... I certainly didn't get to where I am today by constantly thinking about that. I did at first... But was never helpful."

He purrs quietly, humming softly, a tune that feels familiar to himself, something he's hummed so often it comes naturally.

...

"And I'm here now. I'm okay. I'm safe... If anything the best way to spite them was moving on... Proves them wrong."

“Your pack left you! Tortured you!”

{Remy.. didn’t seem like he was just talking about Eddie anymore}

He connects the dots here after the few bits in conversations.

"..."

"I have Volt. I had Ari too for a while. I have new friends that make me feel safe... I have you."

He has a new pack so to speak.

"..."

"We won't leave you either... We want you to feel safe too, you know?"

'We.' He refers to Volt as well. They're kind of a package deal.

"It's okay."

{Remy admits, shakily}

“You’re so gently.. so- so brave”

"... Okay, I have one thing I'll ask for right now then."

He pauses briefly, looking at Remy.

"Do it scared... Because part of it will always seem scary. More often than not you can't get past the fear until you do scared."

He smiles softly at Remy.

"You deserve more than you think you do, spark."

“Okay…”

{Remy grows silent}

Volt stays there, still having the two of them pulled onto his lap. He gently cards his hand through Eddie's hair.

If Remy still doesn't up in half an hour Eddie would end up falling asleep. He feels exhausted from all the emotions, but also feels safe enough with Remy to not push himself to stay awake.

Volt smiles softly and looks at Remy.

"He feels safe with you. He doesn't like sleeping around others unless he feels safe with them."

“I’m going to screw this all up yknow?”

{Remy murmurs into Eddie’s hair}

"I think you'll be quite alright... I like to observe how someone treats Eddie before I decide on anything with them."

And he seems comfortable having Remy around.

"I can tell you care for one. You helped me get Eddie back despite the fact he was your bounty. The little thing of swapping plates, the concern... Maybe you get angry on his behalf, but I do too sometimes."

He pauses briefly.

“Thank you Chér… I’ll.. try my best to be good for you and Eddie”

{Remy sighs and looks back up at Volt}

He smiles softly, and then chuckles slightly at the question.

"We're polyamorous. We're perfectly okay being with multiple people. Just that we're both aware and on the same page... Do consider us a package deal though, but perhaps that may take longer~"

That was genuine flirting from him this time.

"Ari actually... Was our wife... Or well didn't quite get that chance. She deserves that title though."

They've had a third in the past.

"I'm not jealous though. Perhaps a little possessive at times, but not jealous."

He smiles a bit more with an idea.

"Hmmm... Could I pet your ears this time?~"

“Sure- you can touch my ears”

{His tails wagging quickly, brushing against Eddie from time to time}

"Even better, hm?~"

He smirks slightly.

"Quite lovely to have you as well then, dear~"

His voice comes out quite smooth, though certainly still partially a mask. Weirdly enough that becomes a bit more obvious now. He's constantly masking, perhaps it even feel natural to him at this point.

"Hmmm... Sure enough~"

He chuckles slightly.

"I'm plenty sure we still have a good bit to learn of each other, but I feel plenty happy to have you here."

{Remy looks up with his eyes, meeting Volts eyes through his slightly messy hair}

“Got any hobbies? You’ the host at the bar, yes?”

"... Sewing. That is primarily my hobby. I do host the bar, yes."

He looks back at Remy as well.

"Quite like makeup too."

For Eddie being vulnerable was primarily his past, and for Volt he seems hesitant to simply talk about only himself.

[She stumbles into the entrance of the Breaker Box, turning her back towards the bar as if she were making sure she isn't being followed. Her long black cape covers her clothes, while the oversized hood is pulled over her head, obscuring her features and casting a shadow over her eyes. Most strikingly, however, is the scythe she's holding in her hands.]

@objectidentityfraud

It's rather dark out in this area, and the average person around here seems too busy with themself to quite notice. Maybe a few people give an odd glance, but that would be about it.

While the bar had closed for the night, Eddie and Volt hadn't quite gotten around to locking it up yet. The bar would be empty besides those two right now, which would be rather lucky.

Volt would be sitting on the bar counter itself while talking with Eddie as he cleans up the remainder of the glasses by now. It takes only a few seconds for Eddie to notice the person who walked in.

He locks eyes with the scythe pretty much immediately... Which puts him a bit on edge, but hey, he's probably seen weirder.

He doesn't address her right away either, wanting to assess the situation. He catches on to the tenseness and disorientation pretty quickly. He keeps his guard up, but he at least doesn't jump to feeling threatened.

"Hey, you alright...? You seem on edge."

[Her eyes dart between the two of them, as if expecting something in particular to happen. When it doesn't, she only seems to become more interested in hiding her identity, as she tugs down the hood of her cloak to the point of obscuring her own vision.]

Yessir! The perimeter is clear. There are no signs of intruders. Awaiting futher orders.

[She makes her voice extra gruff, not wanting to be recognized.]

[She has an idea of where she might be (though she can never be too certain when it comes to these things) and she doesn't know what Eddie and Volt are, but if there's one thing she knows for sure, it's that she isn't supposed to be here. The fact that she's been seen sneaking around with a weapon is a problem no matter what.]

He looks back at the person.

"Okayyyy... Uh... Further orders.. How about you just come over to sit? I can get you water or whatever."

He sighs and thinks for a bit.

"You recognized something there, assuming us?"

[For a moment, it seems like her lie has paid off, until Eddie questions her. She immediately drops the act -- maybe it's best to play the part of mysterious stranger instead and see how much information she can wring out of them before her identity is revealed.]

"More than a regular bar? Now I'm curious exactly what you mean by that?"

Well, I have it on good authority that some of your patrons are being investigated for plotting to commit high treason. Word on the street is you might even be protecting them. Now, what do you have to say for yourself, Eddison Watts?

"Do not call me that. You can call me Eddie, but you do not get to call me Eddison, understood?"

Something about that name being used by who he sees as a stranger really pissed him off.

He takes a deep breath before continuing.

"High treason? Talking like we're back in the era where kingdoms were a thing."

He sighs and looks at her more clearly.

"Okay so... You clearly aren't from here. In general. Do you even know what year it is?"

He isn't surprised... Weirdly enough... He is trying to figure out what this person is actually thinking though.

Now, now, I'm not looking to pick a fight. If there's anyone here who needs a reminder of what year it is, it's the ruler of this place, who has seemingly read one too many journals.

[She says that while gesturing vaguely at her surroundings.]

Fine. I do not quite know you. I only know you have information I need.

[She takes a seat at the bar, before giving him a cheeky smile.]

He looks over at Volt again. While Volt doesn't verbally say anything, there is still a conversation between the two before Eddie turns back to the woman.

"Look, I have no clue what you're on about. What information? What journals?... I will... help if I can, but I need you to tell what the hell you're on about first."

He genuinely has no clue.

"As for who I am... I'm one of the owners of this bar. My husband and I own it, and I'm the bartender. I'm nothing more than that."

[She lets out a frustrated sigh.]

Information about the dissidents' whereabouts. Literary journals. The ones that publish stories about time travel and such. I wouldn't know, I don't read such drivel. Why should I? Reality is often stranger than fiction.

[Her expression softens, but she shakes her head.]

If that's the case and you truly are as normal as you claim to be, you may not be able to help me. I may have no choice but to wring answers from your real self.

"I don't think you are where you think you are. Even though I know nothing of what you're talking about, I can guarantee you it is incredibly unlikely that anyone in this realm would know."

He has a slip up with saying the word realm. As if there are multiple.

"What do you mean real self?? You're talking about time travel, using outdated language, and generally, frankly, talking about things that just do not make sense for this era."

At this point he's concerned about letting her into public view, because, to him, this is something to do magical shit, or whatever humans will call, that frankly will not go well in the slightest. Likely for any party.

"Okay. I need a very clear explanation that is said to someone as if they know nothing about how things work. I don't think it would be safe for you or others for you to walk out of here with whatever the hell you think is happening... Probably got lucky that you walked into here out of all places."

Why, of course you wouldn't know. Calm down, won't you? You're causing your husband undue stress.

[She shrugs. She doesn't think twice about Eddie choosing to describe this as a realm, though maybe she should, and she actually decides to use his phrasing.]

You may describe this realm as a pocket dimension of sorts that only exists as a product of someone's mind. I don't expect you to believe me, as this is all real to you, but the two of you are merely a reflection of the real Eddie and Volt. Nothing I tell you here will have any repercussions on the real world.

[She pauses, looking at Eddie with mild interest.]

"Okay! If this will have no repercussions then throwing this at you wouldn't hurt, right?"

Eddie smirks smugly, ignoring Volt when he talks.

"Eddie. Put that shit down."

He doesn't listen.

"If this 'figment of imagination' is so complex, then I'd like to know the limits too~"

Is that all?

[In one swift move, she throws her cloak off her shoulders and adopts a battle stance, her scythe held firmly in both hands. It's hard to catch a glimpse of the white and gold princely outfit underneath before it magically transforms, in a flash, into something a lot more reminiscient of the Queen of Hearts.]

[Her battle outfit consists of a red and black dress with frills and Roman numerals around its poofy knee-length skirt, short black gloves, a queenly crown with heart-shaped jewels, and a black veil falling down her back. She wears a black lace choker with a rose and red jewels hanging off it, almost shaped like droplets of blood. Wrapped around her waist, the big bow on her back is decorated with roses as well. One of the last things to transform is her hair, which grows into long platinum blonde ringlets tied up into a high ponytail in a style that would not have been out of place in the Victorian era. Stitches are visible on her arms and legs, wherever her skin isn't covered by clothes.]

[Her heterochromatic eyes narrow, while her lips curve into a smirk. She sneers at Eddie, overconfident -- it's not that she believes that whatever happens here is completely without consequence (she does expect him to be able to hurt her), but she's been honing her fighting skills for years and Eddie doesn't really seem like a strong enemy. If he's gonna be so smug, might as well show him who he's dealing with.]

"Very fancy outfit there. Clear theme on that, reminds me of that queen of hearts character too."

He genuinely admires the outfit despite the situation... He isn't completely into fashion, but Volt is and that does rub off on him a bit.

"Hmm, okay... I'll let you attack first. I think that's fair."

To her Eddie would seem like the overconfident one. He just stands there. Waiting. He isn't even in any sort of stance. He has no weapon.

Why, thank you, darling. It suits me quite well, doesn't it?

[She then goes back into a battle stance, thinking very little of Eddie's self-assured attitude. He's probably never seen anyone like her before, she assumes, so he must not know what he's in for.]

Not to worry. This will only take a second.

[She holds out a hand, summoning what looks like a tarot card of the Fortune arcana, enveloped in a magical blue glow. She doesn't hesitate to crush it with her hand, letting out a guttural scream that makes her sound like she's in pain.]

Headless Horseman!

[On cue, an unmistakenly supernatural creature materializes out of thin air, taking the shape of an unnaturally large horse with a headless rider on its saddle. The rider holds their head in one hand, which, disconcertingly, seems to have the same facial features as Ronnie, as well as long, pale, straight hair flowing in non-existent wind. The head's eyes are closed, which gives them an air of passivity, almost like they're just being carried around, compared to the horse's aggressive stance. Its angry red eyes provide a stark contrast to its black coat, and it moves restlessly, almost like its rider can't control it.]

He stares at the creature, the head, and back at Ronnie.

"Huh, bit unsettling. Not seen that before! Interesting still."

He doesn't move when the horseman charges at him. Even as it gets closer he still doesn't move.

He seems to simply be thinking instead of reacting right away.

"How do you feel about wires?"

As he says that his hair turns into literal wires and a few shoot out from his head. One wraps around the horses neck, another around the leg, and the last one grabs the waist of the rider. The one around the horse's peg yanks it hard, the one around the neck tightens slightly with a jolt of electricity, and the final attempt to pull the riser off the saddle.

"Tarot cards? I'm so curious how that works for you. I didn't sense any mana, unless you're good at suppressing it?"

[The horse neighs, thrashing wildly against the restraints, but the rider holds onto it tightly. Horse and rider, being one entity, aren't easily pulled apart. Ronnie tenses up, but stares at Eddie intently, taking note of the types of elemental attacks he uses and watching for an opening.]

[The horse jolts at the shock, but, more interestingly, she does too, reaching for her neck as if to pull the cables away. It's plain to see that this isn't some random creature that she has summoned to do her bidding for her, but that her mind and the Headless Horseman's are connected to some degree, and she can at least feel the aftershocks, if not the full extent of the pain that it receives.]

[She scowls at Eddie, bitterly. His seemingly casual remarks, combined with the effortless way he fights, don't sit well with her. Even the comment about finding it interesting only feels condescending to her now. The talk about mana seems to confuse her, though.]

Now what is that supposed to mean?

Have you not heard that curiosity killed the cat? Very well. Allow me to demonstrate!

[With a wave of her hand, she recalls the Headless Horseman, which vanishes into thin air as quickly as it appeared. She then repeats the process, crushing a card of the Magician arcana this time.]

Mercurius!

[This one's a lanky figure in bright striking colors, humanoid but clearly not human, with winged shoes larger than its own body and a long golden staff. It floats in the air, ready to attack.]

Garudyne!

[With a wave of its golden staff, Mercurius unleashes the strongest wind attack in Ronnie's arsenal.]

[She's disappointed that she didn't land the first hit, for sure, but she won't let that deter her. She's watching, she's learning, and she's adapting as she goes. Where she comes from, wind is often electricity's elemental opposite, so it's a good start if she wants to find Eddie's weakness. But, even if it isn't, using elemental attacks means that her Personas don't have to get close to Eddie to attack, and, thus, they might have an easier time evading his cables from a distance.]

So these things are an extension of her...

He just watches. He observes, and thinks, and plans. He doesn't want to go too far, so he needs to know the limits.

He figures using electricity may be too strong. May be...

As soon as he senses the wind coming... Sheer copper feathered wings appear and fold in front of him to block the wind. The wings are light and yet very dense in blocking things... He's pushed back a little, but overall unbothered.

"It's like summoning magic then... Not mana related though... These don't seem like spiritual familiars either..."

He mumbles to himself in thought, unfolding his wings when the wind is done.

He uses his wings to fly up and hovers at the same height as the figure she summoned.

"Interesting..."

He flaps his wings harshly and a lot of copper blade like feather launch towards the figure.

[Of course, she can't hear what he mutters to himself from behind his wings, but when he flies towards Mercurius, she braces herself. She seems defensive -- why is this guy inspecting her Personas so closely? That can't be good. Is he trying to figure out her weaknesses? Find out how he can exploit her powers? She tries not to worry too much, though. All she has to do is to keep switching Personas to keep him guessing.]

[Mercurius recoils a bit with each hit it receives, but neither it nor the human behind it seem all too affected.]

[The copper wings are still a problem though... There's no use throwing any other elemental attacks his way as long as he can simply block them. She recalls Mercurius, summoning a card of the Moon arcana instead.]

Succubus!

[Out of the creatures she's summoned, this one is the most human-looking so far, save for the large demon tail and wings that sprout from its back. It's wearing a black leotard, thigh highs, and long gloves, as it floats above ground just like the last one. It's strong against fire and dark magic, but weak against light magic, which shouldn't give her too much trouble based on what she's seen of Eddie's skillset so far.]

Dormina!

"Damn how many of these guys do you got? Got me curious what..."

The spell actually works. It works way to easily. She doesn't know, but Eddie deals with chronic fatigue in the first place... This type of spell would be a major weak point for him, and a spell he is not used to seeing in the slightest. He falls asleep and falls, but Volt is quick to stand up and catch him. He also moves way too fast for a normal human.

Volt also doesn't take his time to mess around as he lets out his own features. If he gets involved. He gets involved.

He has large draconic wings, white with a blue tint scales and large wide spread membrane of a pure white. His wings look light and yet strong. His hands have claws and are covered in similar looking scales, as well as he cheeks being dotted in the like freckles. His eyes go from a blue to a white. His tail is long, covered in scales, and has glowing white fur at the tip... It almost looks electrical.

The scales on his tail look deceivingly smooth. He's all too calm as he carries Eddie to set him on the bar counter.

Then he turns to the woman.

"Do you want to continue? I do not recommend it."

[She recalls Succubus, but when she sees Volt rushing towards Eddie, that stops her from summoning yet another Persona. She becomes guarded when Volt transforms, expecting another fight, but, when he speaks to her, she relaxes again. She doesn't seem to register his words as a threat.]

As I said, I didn't come here asking for a fight. It's your choice.

[She doesn't need to finish them off. It's best not to waste any more of her energy if she doesn't have to.]

[She steps closer to Eddie and Volt so they can chat, but keeps a reasonable distance, not wanting to startle Volt while also making sure she can back off if he changes his mind and decides to attack anyway. Her chin is held high and her movements are self-assured, clearly feeling cocky about having won the fight.]

I want answers. What are you? You are unlike any shadow or cognition I've fought before, but you're clearly not human either. I don't suppose I can take you on as a mask, can I?

"Stop demanding things. I will tell you, but you are to shut the fuck up for a moment."

He doesn't like her cocky attitude... Clearly.

"I'm an elemental ancient dragon for one. You should not expect to even live if you fight me, so I suggest you be a little less confident in this situation."

His voice is direct, assured, and still cold.

"Whatever you mean by shadow, cognition, or mask, is not relevant where you are now. I do not care where you came from, but I would recommend you not cross further boundaries with me or my husband."

He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes for just a moment to form his words properly again.

"I don't know where you're from to begin with, but I will set some things very. Clearly."

"Eddie and I have nothing to do with illusions, or figments, or whatever you want to call that. This is the mortal realm. It is primarily humans in this realm, and species like Eddie or I do not show what we are here. Not under normal circumstances."

"There is the fae realm, but I feel pretty fucking confident that you are not from there either."

He glares at her for a second before pausing to breathe again. He's trying to stay calm.

"I think you should know that sleep magic is a bit of a cheap shot here. It leaves a person completely vulnerable, and had Eddie been on his own..."

Something about the sleep magic specifically is heavily getting to him. As if it isn't even what Ronnie considers them losing that is the problem, but instead that spell specifically.

"Either way. I would prefer you not pull that shit again even in a fight. Despite my willingness to fight dirty, that type of magic beyond that here."

"Now how about you explain who the fuck you are, hm?"

He whips his tail against the ground. It's loud, and sends sparks of electricity flying.

[Even after he's finished talking, she remains silent for a moment, thinking about what he said.]

Species?

[She's seen dragons and other mythological beings many times before, but they've always been cognitive beings or shadows of some sort. To look at someone like Volt and think he's a real, flesh-and-blood dragon, living and breathing right in front of her eyes... it's hard to believe it. Fae realm? Mortal realm? Are there more worlds out there than she thought? It's not so hard to believe, but that would mean...]

[She steps back again, seemingly trying to keep herself grounded. She glances around as if she's seeing her surroundings for the first time all over again.]

Where am I?

[As if tied to her emotional state, her outfit turns back into what she had been wearing underneath the cloak. She very much looks like 19th century nobility, wearing an elegant suit jacket with a coattail, a jabot on her neck, fitted white pants, tall boots, white gloves, and a golden chain indicating the presence of a pocket watch. Her hair is completely different now, straight and short on the sides with the top neatly combed upwards, albeit still the same blonde shade. She has no crown this time, it would've been impractical to wear under the cloak.]

[She looks away, knitting her brows in frustration. It's easy to see that this is a side of herself she doesn't like very much... When she's the Queen of Hearts, she feels strong, beautiful, and powerful -- even if she's just beating up monsters to overcompensate for the freedom she lacks in the real world.]

[She desperately doesn't want to introduce herself. Revealing her identity is the very last thing she should be doing no matter what. But Volt is already angry enough, and she has no doubt that he might follow up on his threats. It can't be helped.]

[She shrugs in defeat, trying to pretend she's not as bothered about it as she actually is.]

Prince Christopher.

[She smirks a little.]

Beloved by my kingdom and abroad. Even if you have been hiding from humans wherever this is, you might have heard of me, yes? When I'm not rescuing puppies, founding orphanages, or charming foreign dignitaries, I infiltrate my subjects' mind palaces and reap their shadows.

[She gestures with her scythe in hand to emphasize her words.]

[She then sighs, throwing her head back, figuring she should probably apologize for using the wrong spell on Eddie. Her expression is not exactly apologetic or regretful, but it might be best described as grave.]

This may sound absurd to you, but I had no clue I was fighting a real living being. You must understand, most shadows and cognitions can simply regenerate after being killed. Had I realized that your husband wasn't one of them, I assure you I wouldn't have been nearly as careless.

He pauses at her transforming... His expression changes slightly, but it's hard to exactly tell what he's feeling.

"You don't need to hide that. What's your preferred name then?"

He asks completely genuinely. No judgement... Despite the circumstances that is still something he'd always respect. Doesn't matter the situation at all to him.

"There's no kingdoms in this world..."

He pauses again and sighs. Well shit, this isn't great circumstances.

"You aren't in your world anymore then... This is not quite something that's happened before. Considering all that happens here, I'm still not surprised."

He flicks his tail in front of him to fidget with in thought. He seems to consider his words a lot more than Eddie.

"You didn't know, so I don't believe much else could have gone differently then."

He relaxes again and walks over to sit on the bar counter next to Eddie.

"Would you actually like that water now, or are we going to keep bickering?"

Don't be ridiculous. That is my name.

[Well, it's impossible to explain away the dress, isn't it? She feels like she's going to be sick... she usually doesn't have to worry about these things because she has no need to summon her Personas in the real world, so she's able to keep those two facets of herself completely separate from each other. Most shadows are too focused on trying to kill her to judge, and when the occassional shadow does judge, it never has any lasting consequences. This is entirely different.]

[But hey, it's not her world. As long as word about this can't possibly get out...]

[She looks around for a bit until she finds the cloak she had discarded on the ground, throwing it back on.]

Those who don't know my real identity simply call me Reaper. That would be acceptable.

[She's downplaying her feelings a lot... She actually loves that moniker. Not only does it feel fitting, but for someone who has never had anything that's truly her own, let alone a name, being given some sort of codename really means so much more to her than she's letting on. Alongside her battle outfit, it's one of two things that belong to her and only to her.]

[Now that Volt seems more relaxed, she's able to relax as well. She glances at Eddie, considering the offer, before she approaches the bar and takes a seat. She seems tired.]

Yes. That would be lovely, thank you.

[She wouldn't normally accept a drink from a stranger, but now that her secret's been exposed, she might as well drink anything, she can't be bothered about the risks right now.]

I've never heard of such a thing as Mangrove city before, let alone the fae realm.

[That makes her wonder how she ended up here... Volt did mention that nothing like this has happened before, so there's only one reasonable conclusion.]

This may all be my doing. You probably don't know this, but shadows have the ability to warp time and space. Though this has never happened to me before either, I suppose that being sent to a different reality is not outside the realm of possibility.

"Okay... Reaper then."

He stands back up and goes behind the bar to grab a bottle of water from the fridge, then puts it on the counter in front of her.

He listens quietly, tail swaying slowly behind him as he glances at Eddie every so often. He hides it decently well, but he's easily anxious about Eddie...

"Ah I see. I suppose that would make sense then, though there is question of if you're able to do the same thing to get back... If you would wish to. There is no rush in either case."

He fidgets with the fur on his tail more.

[She considers Volt's implied offer, eyeing him with an unreadable look on her face. The idea of staying and exploring this new world is very tempting, but she also has her whole life waiting for her back home... She can't risk it too much.]

My subjects would worry if I were away for too long, although it wouldn't hurt to stay for some time. However, Eddie was right. I'm clearly out of my depth in this world. If I were to stay overnight, I wouldn't even know where to find lodging.

[She sighs. She doesn't like admitting to being helpless, but trying to pretend she's not would make things even more awkward.]

You must be Volt, correct? You and Eddie seem to be inseparable even across different realities. How very romantic.

[She hums, thinking about the differences between the two couples.]

He chuckles at her saying he seems inseparable from Eddie. He takes that as a compliment in some way.

"Yes, I am Volt. I would say we are quite inseparable, indeed..."

He takes a deep breath at the question of hiding from humans. The expression on his face goes through multiple emotions. Some anger. Some frustration. Some disgust, grief, fear, anguish... There's a lot to feel about that question. Not enough facial expressions to describe it.

"I suppose power wise it would be arguable that I am stronger than humans... but humans are quite the stubborn bunch. Give them fire and they make entire forests burn down for the sake of building more housing or factories. Give them the knowledge of atoms and they create the most destructive weapons that exist even beyond magic..."

He sighs and takes a moment.

"There was a time where we didn't hide. Was... A lot of mythical species went extinct, many endangered, some just hunted. Some species thought to be evil would be hunted out of undignified fear. Some species just looked pretty, so they hunted them to use as just decor. Some species were thought grant abilities like eternal life, good health, power..."

"Sure, the fae realm always existed as a place where all of us came from, but thing is that it isn't always the most safe place either... Pick your poison a lot of times."

He doesn't bother sugarcoating any of this.

"My species was hunted because it was thought our blood granted immortality if consumed. I am the last one left."

He picks at his nails absentmindedly as he speaks.

That sounds delightful. Free of charge? You are such a darling, thank you very much.

[She stares at Volt's display of emotions, not having expected her question to bother him this much. Her own expression remains level, and she listens intently as he explains the nature of humanity, the extinction of mythological species, and what happened to his own species.]

It's true. Humans can be quite stubborn indeed. You have my condolences.

[She can't imagine what it was like for Volt to watch his species die out -- she's not even sure what to say, so she keeps it simple.]

[She knows what it's like to live in hiding, though, to have to pretend to be someone she's not, all while knowing that, if someone were to find out, the people who love her now would end up turning against her... for more than one reason. So even though she can't understand what Volt went through, at least she has an idea of what it must be like now that he's living amongst humans.]

[Her eyes grow wide at the mention of immortality, but she quickly forces a neutral expression onto her face. She seems uncomfortable all of a sudden, but forces herself to make eye contact with Volt.]

Based on your wording, I take it that wasn't true?

[She then looks away, fixing her gaze on her bottle.]

Either way, this information seems too dangerous to share with someone you barely know. Of course, no one would believe me if I tried to expose you, but is it truly worth the risk?

He doesn't says no need to thank them for no charge... He just directly implies they do not need money from it. So easily.

"I appreciate the condolences then, though it is quite alright now. Suppose that was a good several thousand years ago now. Stop counting have a while really."

He pauses on the question of his word. This is something to be careful about his honesty with... He should be fine. One person, and he knows no one would ever believe her if she said anything. Maybe it'd be fun to see a more modern person's reaction, even if not from this world. Entertainment is something that can get the best of his judgement.

"The risk is low when it is one person. You also have no documentation here, there would be no records if you disappeared. No one would know. So there is no risk to begin with."

The implications there are said so casually and without guilt.

"You're reaction to the mention of immortality is making me curious though... What would you say if it was true, but not in the way humans thought?"

Is that a threat?

[She's very clearly upset, but something in her expression changes after a few seconds of silence. Without warning, she lets out a breathy, bitter laugh -- not in a condescending way, because she knows Volt is absolutely right, but in a wounded way, almost like she's resigned to whatever he decides to do to her.]

It's all the same, no matter where I go.

[She looks away, standing up, and she starts pacing the room, distancing herself from the bar.]

I would say, leave me out of it. What good would come out of me having this information?

[She sounds very serious. She rubs her face with her hands as if she had a headache.]

Need I remind you that humans would do anything for the slimmest chance at attaining eternal life? For heavens' sake, it sounds like you of all creatures should know that.

[She looks at Volt again from a distance, seemingly bothered by his mischievious expression. He told her about his past, then threatened her for knowing too much, now he's teasing her with the idea that he could hold the secret to immortality... It's almost as if he wants to hurt her.]

"Oh uh— I—"

That's the first time his words stumble. The first time some of that anxiety leaks through. He is so well put together, and the moment that slips he feels anxiety set in so. Easily.

He just tenses and listens, losing eye contact, losing that high demeanor. Swearing at himself internally.

"Look. I do know that. I know it painfully well, but at the same time I know the risk is non existent, so why should it matter in this one case?... Does anything have to come of you knowing anything to begin with?— It's not even that simple to begin with."

His words come out fast and jumbled. He fidgets with the fur on his tail more tensely. Fucks sake get it together. He's supposed to be stronger than this.

"I did not mean for that to... I... It kind of was a threat but— I... It was more of meant as a fact— I do apologize."

God damn it get it together.

"I am not trying to provoke a fight, no... I uh..."

He glances at Eddie. Now would be a great fucking time to have someone who's more blunt. Someone who doesn't put up an act has nothing to stumble over.

He feels like an idiot now. Wrong tone, read the room wrong, something off, what of his tone was it? The words were wrong, but the tone can fix those things so easily, what part can he fix for next time? He's overanalyzing his side of the conversation now, because to him he needs to learn the exact details that went sour so he can fix it.

"How about a drink?"

[More importantly, though, she doesn't have anywhere else to go as long as she's stuck in this world. It's best to play along and try to get on his good side, if at all possible.]

You misunderstand. The risk is non-existent to you.

[She sighs, crossing her arms over her chest.]

Please, you must forgive my outburst. If anything, I should count myself lucky. If somebody else from my reality had wandered here in my stead, this encounter might have turned out quite differently.

[She takes a deep breath, calming herself down. It's fine. She's fine. Nothing is going to happen. There's no need to get stressed out over what could have been.]

[Somehow, when Volt describes it as a fact, it doesn't make her feel any better. It just makes her feel bad in a different way.]

Yes, yes, of course. You're much more powerful than I am. Is that what you want to hear?

[Her tone is bitter. She isn't interested in testing Volt's powers for herself, as she has nothing to gain from fighting him, but the fact that he's so incredibly confident that she would go down easily if he were to fight her is fanning the flames of the insecurities she already had.]

[The question gives her pause. She blinks at Volt quizzically.]

I don't know.

[She's being honest. A drink was the furthest thing from her mind until he asked. She still doesn't know what to make of him, but if he were to pour her a drink right now, she might actually drink it. Might as well. Or she might not. She's still processing everything that's going on... and she's not entirely convinced she isn't having some weird dream right now.]

[Then she remembers she's supposed to endear herself to Volt. Her expression softens a bit, though it's forced.]

"How would it be a risk to another individual for them to know that information? I do not see the sense in that."

His question is genuine.

He pauses at the third statement and though not physically he does mentally recoil from that. Yes, he is more powerful, but he doesn't mean to flaunt it. What is he getting wrong? He's only getting more stressed.

He doesn't get words out for that statement.

Then he directly stares at her when she forces that expression.

"Don't do that."

He probably shouldn't be that blunt, but that anxiety is making it hard for him to be tactful. When Eddie's blunt it comes off so naturally. In a way that just doesn't feel off putting... Volt doesn't get that.

"I don't care if I'm more powerful. One slip up bad enough and that doesn't matter in the end... Don't do that act of apologizing and acting like the only factor is things being unfamiliar. Probably is a factor, but for you maybe not the main one."

He takes a deep breath and gets up, walking behind the bar counter.

"Would you like to try Eddie and I's favorite drink? I'm making the non alcoholic version either way."

He's not giving her alcohol when he knows so little.

"Please just stop reading my words like that."

As I said, some humans would do anything for immortality, correct? This doesn't only include putting themselves at risk, but putting other humans at risk as well.

Imagine, for example, that Their Majesties, the king and queen, were able to harness the power of the shadows to reliably travel between this realm and our own and learned that you might hold the key to immortality. Do you think they would fight you with their own hands? Certainly not.

[She drops the facade when Volt tells her to, leaving her expression flat and maybe a little jaded. Her tone of voice is also flat, if tired.]

How could you tell it was an act?

[She tentatively steps back towards the bar.]

I understand. I'm exceptionally powerful where I come from, yet I know full well that power alone won't protect anybody.

[There's something that intrigues her about his words. If Volt's so sure that he's stronger than her, even though he hasn't seen the full extent of her powers, then what could he possibly be scared of? However, she can tell Volt's uncomfortable and trying to change the topic, so she decides not to press him for more information on that for now. Maybe that can wait until he's relaxed a bit.]

[The offer doesn't get a visible reaction out of her, but she easily goes along with it.]

That's a shame. I could use some alcohol right now.

[She's not too bothered by it, though. In fact, she smiles a little.]

Very well. I'll leave it up to your discretion, but you must tell me what's in it. I can't help but wonder if your alcoholic drinks are really all that different from the ones we have back home.

[That last comment gives her some thought. She didn't think she was reading too much into Volt's words, and even if she was, what's the problem with that? She doesn't make a habit of trusting anyone, why should she start now that she's in a more vulnerable situation than usual? She can try to come off as less combative, but it feels impossible when she's already revealed her identity to him.]

His voice is more calm and even now. He doesn't care to smooth it out anymore at the least.

"Social masks aren't hard to spot for me... The act of charming is such a blatant one to me."

He begins mixing together two sour whiskeys.

"It's a whiskey sour. I'm using an alternative base to the whiskey and adding lemon juice, simple syrup, and egg white. Eddie made it for me a while back... I don't think I liked it at first, but he could probably make me like anything."

You're impossible. Why would you be concerned? I'd be one forced to fight you -- and you clearly seem to think I wouldn't survive, so please, spare me. For heaven's sake.

[She lets out a strained breath, calming herself down, though she's still tense.]

I don't expect you to understand. After all, why should you care about human lives after what humans did to you and your species? I--

[She sucks in air through her teeth, then reaches for the bottle of water and takes a swig, as if to stop herself from saying any more. She sighs.]

Shadows are supernatural creatures. It doesn't matter.

[She looks at Volt's hands as he works, trying to ground herself by focusing on what's right in front of her, but it's clear her mind is elsewhere.]

He is calm... Until Ronnie makes the comment about Volt not caring. He turns around quickly and glares at her as leans over the counter. His hair sparks up slightly.

"You do not get to imply I should or do not care. Just because in the past that shit happened, does not mean I lack care for the people of today. They had nothing to do with that. There is a difference between hate and caution."

He takes a deep shaky breath steps back again.

"..."

He just breathes for a moment. His hair calms back down.

"I apologize about that. I will not be changing my mind on the alcohol, no."

Is that so? How would you know the difference?

[She then pauses, thinking about it some more. She says her next words quietly, as if she were worried someone might overhear.]

Are you implying you would target whoever is ordering those people around instead?

[She starts a little when Volt glares at her, especially because of the way his hair sparks. She takes another deep breath, once again trying to stay level and think rationally about this situation.]

... My apologies. I suppose you're right.

[Despite her insistence, she doesn't seem to mind too much.]

He turns back around and set down the drink in front of her as he moves to sit on top of the bar counter instead of an actual seat. He'd be to left of her right now.

"I have experience knowing who is in charge... Go after them. No one deserves to die for being forced into that."

He sips his drinks and sighs as he glances at Eddie again.

"..."

He's silent for a bit again. So unpredictable to know when he'll wake back up... It gets anxiety inducing after a while.

"..."

[The idea that Volt would go after the person in charge makes her smile, but she then pauses for a moment and a haunted look crosses her eyes when she hears no one deserves to die for being forced into that. Her voice when she responds is heavy with emotion, but it's not too clear which one. Fear of death, perhaps, or powerlessness at her circumstances. Maybe she's touched that someone has acknowledged how unfair her life is. It could be a mix of all of the above.]

... Yes. I would agree.

[Now more relaxed due to Volt's reassurances, she's more open to the discussion they were having before. There's still a few things she's curious about, after all.]

You mentioned immortality doesn't work exactly as humans assumed it would, though, didn't you? In that case, even if someone did take you down, they might not become immortal, would they?

[She notices the way Volt glances at Eddie.]

"I did, yes... There is two reasons though."

He sighs and decides on moving Eddie before explaining. He picks him up and walks into a different room for a few minutes before returning.

"To become immortal with my blood I actually have to give it myself. Harm by others changes that property."

He sips his drink while he thinks for a bit again.

"There are also three types of immortality. I think humans tend to not realize it isn't just not dying..."

"Functional immortality simple means you can't die from natural causes. You can still be killed by outside means... Technical immortality means normal methods of being killed and natural causes cannot kill you. You can still die from specific methods."

He doesn't elaborate on that one for now.

"Then true immortality, which is the one everyone assumes to be the case. Having zero way to die. Nothing at all can kill you. But there is only one cause for it."

He says cause as if it isn't a thing of benefit...

"It can only happen to people with low mana tolerance... I could elaborate, but I will warn you that it is not pretty."

I see. How curious. I don't suppose you tend to give your blood out easily though, do you?

[She nods along at the explanation, decently interested.]

Functional immortality...

[She mutters that part to herself.]

If someone were biologically mortal, but were come back to life after each death, what would you call it? Of course, I'm assuming such a thing is possible in this world.

[She chuckles a little at Volt's warning, not mocking him or anything, but politely, as if this were simply small talk. She's not concerned as long as it doesn't happen to her.]

... Huh, wonder who?...

"I suppose that exists in a way here... Just means someone would keep reviving you after every death, which is not pleasant. It would probably wear down a person's soul if I had to guess."

He chuckles at being told to go ahead.

"Okay then... True immortality is only caused by an infection of mana. If a person with low mana tolerance is suddenly put into a mana dense area there is a chance they'd absorb the mana so rapidly that instead of dying from it would fuse with their soul. This leads to the mana crystalizing within the person's body, binding their soul to it completely."

He lets that sit for a moment.

"This can lead to rapid sudden bodily changes. Sprouting wings, or an extra set of limbs, horns, really any feature another species could have... Not only is the mana rapidly crystalizing in your body painful, so is gaining those features. Say you sprout wings, they tear through your flesh to form followed by your flesh immediately mending itself back together which is also painful. You'd never form scars beyond the bodily changes in the start."

There's more!

"A mana infected person cannot die, yes, but they become very fragile at the same time. They can also use unlimited amounts of mana. Expel and hold. That doesn't mean their spells can't hurt them though."

"Their body can practically shatter, be completely destroyed, and they do not regenerate their body mends itself. The pieces of their body are never gone, they just come back together and fuse. Imagine breaking a bone and its shattered pieces rapidly snap back together."

This is worse than death.

"While they can use unlimited mana, there is also a high chance their larger spells can just explode in their face. Not to mention the chronic pain from crystalized mana so close to your nerves, heart, and brain."

...

"One of the things that is common for these people gets referred to as 'repetitive bodily death.' They can essentially feel their body die every time it is injured in a way that would be fatal before they mend back together... There are cases of them being forced into wars."

Your husband, I presume?

[She then tilts her head as another thought hits her, her lips curling into a playful smirk.]

Is that why neither of you were worried I'd be able to hurt you?

[She nods as Volt talks about revival, as if that bit of information doesn't surprise her. The bit about a person's soul clearly gives her something to think about, as she looks away while taking a sip of her drink, solemnly, but she keeps herself from saying anything.]

[She listens to the whole explanation in silence. At first it's not too clear if she's even paying attention, but then she responds.]

Wings and horns... Interesting.

That sounds incredibly painful. I suppose you might describe it as giving up your comfort in exchange for eternal life, correct? It can't be easy, but I'm sure there's no shortage of people who are willing to make that sacrifice.

[She smirks at that thought, her voice becoming more mischievous.]

Fitting end for humans who'd dare to play around with forces they do not understand.

[She drops that tone quickly, however, returning to that mild curiosity and detachment that might make her seem a little too confident that she's not in any danger even though she's in this world now for who knows how long.]

Does that happen often? Surely there must be some way to protect humans from it, yes?

[It doesn't sound like it happens often, but it's not like she would be able to identify an environment with a high density of mana anyway. The fae realm sounds like something that shouldn't be easy to access, but she might be wrong. For all she knows, watching someone become mana infested might be just another Thrusday for the humans in this world.]

[When Volt starts talking about repetitive bodily death, however, her gaze drifts away, as she stares at nothing in particular with a far away look in her eyes. Her drink remains on the counter, her hand placed around it, and she stays silent for a moment. Suddenly, her eyes widen as if in an attempt to snap her out of her thoughts and wake her up, and she takes another couple of seconds before speaking as if she had to process the words Volt said again.]

Would something like that be useful in war? They might be able to survive anything, of course, but it sounds like their bodies might be so easy to break they probably wouldn't get very far.

There's just this weird undertone of sadness to it. Like giving Eddie his blood was not done out of want, but need...

He continues.

"And, no. We'd be functionally immortal, perhaps heal faster, but we aren't unkillable. Even technical immortality is rare, only with a few select species."

"I wasn't concerned, because I believe with strategizing I'd win... You seem strong regardless."

He laughs at her statement of people willingly doing that.

"Oh heavens no. I have never seen a single person want that, especially since you either know what happens or it is accidental..."

"It does not happen at all anymore. There are strict laws against it in within the fae realm... That law was heavily enforced after the war. Anyone who was mana infected during that time was often stolen by the angels and used as a weapon. Not many, but the angels were desperate back then..."

He pauses briefly.

"They have since been... Sorted for war crimes. Probably a large amount of laws made specifically because of them."

The fuck happened?

He sighs and adjust the way he sits.

"They don't need to be mobile. They can use any magic they wish. Teleport, puppetry, revival, healing. Simple explode their body... Their strength of mana is one of the only ways souls can be truly shattered. They can kill technically immortal people. It's why they were used..."

...

"They deserved better. Some were kidnapped, accidentally taken in a mistake... Some happened to wish to go somewhere they'd feel was better than here... Don't make deals with random people here, you never know what they are."

To be subjected to constant death and pain, forced to kill others in a war not even from your world... The constant guilt they'd feel after. Not just survivors guilt, but so much they did even though they were given no choice... Does the physical pain still echo through their body after too?

[She can't help the wide smile on her face as he recognizes her strength.]

Indeed. I wouldn't have made it this far if I weren't strong. However, you shouldn't underestimate my ability to strategize, either. If I expect to inherit the crown, I must be as a clever as I am strong.

[Her expression is hard to read when Volt clarifies that no one would ever willingly do that. She looks almost... disappointed? She clears her throat awkwardly, readjusting her response.]

Why, yes, of course, when you word it that way, yes, no one in their right mind would be willing to make a sacrifice that great. Not to mention those who care about immortality generally want to keep their bodies young and healthy as well.

[There's a lot more she wants to ask about the fae realm, who governs it, who the angels were at war with, how can the law be enforced against magical beings, and what happened to those humans, who presumably couldn't go back to their regular lives after being infected, but she figures this will probably be easier to understand after Volt has explained mana to her.]

[At this point, she's not even sure she can say she only wants to know this as intel. It might be some kind of... misplaced desire for escapism. As long as she's trying to figure this world out, she doesn't have to worry about the world that's waiting for her back home.]

[Her eyes widen as Volt lists different types of magic.]

That's incredible. There's no teleportation in our reality. Shadows can explode, certainly, but such a thing would not be physically possible in the real world. Revival, though? That would certainly make them irreplaceable, not only in the battlefield, but in general.

And if they refuse to do their captors' bidding... nothing is lost, because no matter how much you hurt them, they'll never die. Sooner or later, you could force them to do anything.

[She goes silent for a bit, brows knit. Wishing to go somewhere better... She's all too familiar with that feeling. Her powers may not be all sunshine and rainbows, but she should be grateful that her calls for help were answered by her Personas, instead of... angels, apparently.]

[She nods, genuinely thankful for the warning.]

I'll keep my guard up.

[She takes a sip of her drink and smiles amicably.]

"I'll start with the base to make understanding it easier. There are two base forms of magic. Dark and light... Light magic targets one's soul while dark targets the body."

"Light magic can involve revival as it brings the soul back while healing the body. It can purifying illnesses as well... However, light magic tends to be a lot more harsh when it is used to harm. It can shatter a person's soul. Not only destroying the body but also the entire being. This is an extreme case, often only mana infected people are capable of that much damage."

"Dark magic can destroy people's bodies, but can also heal and aid in its own way. Puppet magic being used to help those who are immobile, poison used in small doses for medicine. Acid used to get rid of trash for environmental protection. Illusion magic used for art shows... However, dark magic is the only type that can kill technically immortal people. Those cannot die, they often can still take damage. Destroying every ounce of their body and all that remains is their soul. Light magic cannot chatter an immortals sould beyond functional."

He takes a deep breath before continuing.

"These bases were general at first, and then forms of specific spells were developed later. Angels founded light magic, while dark magic has no specific origin point. It was founded through several species together."

"Historically there used to be a lot of people specialized into specific spell categories, but as magic became more widely used and easier to use it was quick for people to generalize their spells rather than specialize."

"There are spells that fit into neither as well. Such as elemental spells, and disarming spells. Disarming spells are widely frowned upon."

"Magic uses mana in a way of bending and manipulating it. Magic and mana are separate... Alchemy also uses mana, and its origin point is completely unknown. It uses mana in order to create false matter. The matter is no different from naturally occuring things, but is simply made through converting to energy of mana itself into matter... No one knows who founded that, but it is a type of mana use that does mot require a mana vault. It can also be used by people with lower mana tolerance, but a minor amount is still needed."

"Mana is also a heavy influence on how fae evolved over time. Though I am not qualified in explaining that."

He pauses briefly.

How interesting. In my reality, light and dark magic are simply considered to be two more types of elemental magic, not unlike fire, ice, and all the others. Neither of them target anything specifically, as they merely inflict damage the same way as anything else.

Let me guess. A war broke out between the forces of light and dark magic. Angels against everyone else, then?

When you say disarming spells, you mean those that inflict sleep, brainwashing, amnesia, confusion, and dizziness, correct? Am I missing any?

That's amusing. You say those are frowned upon, but the ones that cause physical harm aren't?

We had alchemists in our reality as well, but their pursuits came to be understood as more of a pipe dream and the practice died out. That may be for the best, as I imagine the economy would crumble if people were able to freely replicate precious metals whenever they wished. It must not very well known in this world, is it?

You speak about souls as if they're a physical entity and their damage can be measured. That's fascinating. Do you know what happens to someone's soul after their body is destroyed?

[She grasps her scythe with one hand, as if on instinct, while she leans in towards Volt with a smirk on her face.]

"... More to that. Angels were a major part of it, but there were some faeries, certain draconic people, some pixies. Angels were a primary, but I would not dumb down the war to light and dark. Angels decided the morality of things. There is no difference in the morality of light and dark, but angels back then wanted an enemy... They wanted to have full control."

He sighs.

"Either way. The people who used dark magic actually never did anything wrong to instigate it. They just lived differently."

He's outside those two groups though.

"Disarming spells are generally consider anything that completely prevents an enemy from fighting. Confusion is fair as they can still have some autonomy. Brainwashing is consider as manipulation category... Which... Is uh also... Frowned upon."

The mention of brainwashing magic seems to make him extremely uncomfortable.

"Uh... Ahem... Physical harm ones are not, as they are considered standard use in fights. People are going to fight regardless, but we try to respect it to an extent."

He chuckles at the mention of alchemy.

"It is known my fae, but not well understood. Very few use it, and even less teach it. From my understanding it is more risky. You can make false matter, even organic matter if you have such extreme skill, but it is very easy to accidentally alter yourself by playing with it."

... Alter yourself?

"Souls are sort of physical. Some people can see them. Species or with spells. And their damage can be measured, yes... There is also a known after life. Lady Death has visited here a few times."

That's ominous.

"Yes."

He answers to the last question.

Eddie leans into Remy's hand when he rubs his thumb against Eddie's cheek.

He takes some deep breaths at first they're shaky, but slowly they even out and he relaxes.

His heart rate settles again, and his body loses that tension.

"It was so hard..."

He leans into Remy, face in his neck again.

"I didn't want you to know that yet..."

His purring softens and slows.

"..."

He's quiet for a while.

"Almost lost... Four times..."

He admits hesitantly.

"I... Volt was there."

Only reason he's still here.

"I'm so glad he was... I'm happy I'm still here..."

He takes a deep breath.

"Got to meet Ari... Now you... I have friends who actually give a shit... I got to actually be myself..."

Ari must be who used to live here.

"... Fucking hell that... That wording. Maybe causes I lost so many other fights the thought of winning the worst one hits so much harder."

He chuckles slightly, a bit shaky still.

"A lot still hurts. Some things in your head just don't leave..."

...

"Ptsd..."

He thinks for a while, silent.

He's silent for a few minutes.

He takes a deep breath and then talks.

"... Some things I'm not ready to say still..."

But he would like to share some others still.

"I started this bar I think... 50 or 40 years ago. Time isn't something I remember well— uh... Wasn't very social, but I ended up in this friend group a few years in. Seemed good, but looking back I missed a lot of red flags."

He fidgets with one of his hands by tapping his fingers together.

"Notable context is that I'm trans." That he isn't scared to say anymore. "Which I didn't really accept until a while into that friend group... I... I trusted them... I thought it'd be good to tell them first."

He pauses again.

"Quickly became the joke in the friend group... Then a punching bag pretty much. Was scared they tell people, so I did nothing."

...

"Tried to fight back one day and... Grabbed me. Held me down. Beat me. Hell they set alcohol on fire after pouring some onto me... Few... Stabs, but kinda got lucky to live."

Those are where the injuries happened.

"I kind of just laid there... I don't remember how long. Couldn't go to a human doctor."