❝ ⌗ ﹒ humans constantly feel pain in their hearts. because the heart is so sensitive to pain, humans also feel that to live is to suffer ໒꒱ ❞
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☆ before you follow ☆
🌙 updated : june 1st, 2026
🌙 theme is kaworu nagisa from neon genesis evangelion and was made by @.abudasima
🌙 TW : obsessive themes/behavior , sadomasochism , homicidal/suicidal ideation , self-harm , mentions of stalking , etc. block me if any of these make you uncomfortable, don't report
🌙 DNI : trump/maga supporters , mdni blogs , radqueers , harmful transids , pro genai , "irl darlings" , anti-recovery , etc. do not try to reality check me. I block freely
🌙 I am chronically ill and neurodivergent. due to this, my online activity and replies are highly inconsistent
🌙 I am quite possessive and obsessed with my boyfriend, do not make jokes about us breaking up or jokes about him disliking me
🌙 I condone the things I post about, and I'm strictly yan4yan. my posts are directed
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☆ about me ☆
🌙 you can call me lance. I use he/hymn/it/rot pronouns
🌙 I'm a minor (16), my birthday is june 2nd
🌙 I'm taken by my darling boy @whitecotton22 ♡ dec 5th
🌙 I'm transmasc, biromantic/verian, demiaceflux, and ambiamorous
🌙 alongside being an irl yan, I'm a lifestyle jirai danshi and hikikomori
🌙 I am a kaworu nagisa fictionkin. doubles iwc, sourcemates are welcome
🌙 I'm a (mostly) non-sharing yumeshipper. I am an Astarion (bg3) gachikoi, and he is my main f/o - posts are partially about him. doubles dni
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all the asks from the angelic ask game pretty please !!
I love you <3
Of course, my angel!! I love you more by the way <333
halo : what would you classify your love as (e.g. protective, possessive, dependent, manipulative, self-sacrificing, or something else) ? which trait of yours is the strongest, and which one do you usually try to suppress infant of your darling?
•I would say it's a mix of several of those, but mainly protective. Certainly my strongest trait is being extremely clingy and dependent on my darling, and I try to suppress my possessiveness towards him. I don't want to creep him out ;)
cherub : In what ways does obsession distort the way you interpret your beloved’s actions?
• Surprisingly, it doesn't affect how I interpret him. Of course, I overthink a lot and don't think I'm good enough for him, but I tend to analyze people's tones and actions, so I know very well that everything he says is genuine and comes from the heart. I love analyzing this man so much :)
gospel : what is your philosophy on love? is it destiny, earned devotion, mutual choice, or something you take and guard all for yourself?
• Poetically speaking, I think destiny is truly lovely, but I strongly believe in earned devotion. In fact, it was my darling who stalked my blog first, not the other way around—I don't think I could have interacted first.
holy : if your beloved stopped loving you, would you accept or resist it?
• I hate to say this, but I would definitely resist it. Send him like thirty messages in a row and try to convince him to stay with me. I'd cry a lot, I don't know how to deal with losses well to be honest..
altar : do you present yourself as innocent or harmless to get closer to your darling or are you genuine ? how much of that persona is genuine versus intentional?
• No, I truly present myself as I am. I might hide a lot of my possessive traits, but I could never lie to him. All he knows about me is who I am, so I'd say 90% genuine, because there are things I'm apprehensive about him knowing.
ascension : do you have personal moral limits when it comes to love? what actions would you take?
• That's an intriguing question. Everyone has personal bondaries so I would only do what my darling wouldn't be uncomfortable with. I have a sense of what's disrespectful, and I would never be extreme; I'm such a soft yandere when it comes to love.
divinity : how deeply do you analyze your beloved? do you memorize patterns, preferences, routines?
• I analyze him intensely; I think it must be my love language—analyzing every trait, every pattern in his behavior. Obviously, I do, but not as much because unfortunately we're in a long-distance relationship, so I can't memorize patterns and routines exactly, but I know his preferences and I love to please him.
afterlife : does loving someone make you feel elevated and better, or smaller and more desperate? which version of yourself shows up most in relationships with said beloved?
• Neither of them. Loving makes me feel whole; it's everything I've searched for my whole life. Our love is calming and unhurried, even though we're unhealthy obsessed with each other. I tend to be softer only with him, but in general, I'm very genuine when it comes to feelings.
saint : in your ideal relationship, how much independence is allowed? do you imagine merging lives completely, or maintaining separate identities?
• If it could happen, I'd want to be less independent as possible. Totally merging lives if that was to his liking, of course. I don't want to be away from him at all.
fallen : if they slowly drifted away, would you chase, change or even let yourself silently accept the ending?
• I would chase him relentlessly; I can't be without the person who keeps me going. He's my best friend and everything rolled into one, I love my angel unconditionally and I just hope he never leaves me.
It was really interesting answering this ask game, I like to write so it was perfect for me and I'll love answering more of these, my angel. ꒰ঌ(˶ˆᗜˆ˵)໒꒱
Hello, my angel!! All the questions from the ask game! I'd love to see your answers and also, I should reblog some as well, I'll remember,sorry (T^T)
I love you so much ₊⁺ ૮꒰ •͈ ·̭ •͈ ꒱ა ⁺₊
I love you too, my sweetheart <3 and don't worry, I'll always wait ^^
saccharine ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ - gush about your darling !! what are your favourite things about them? what's a small detail about them you like? - I could write so much about my darling, he's genuinely amazing. I don't need anyone else. I just need him, he's wonderful. he's kind and he's passionate and he's soft and loving. he makes me feel so safe and happy. I can't pick a favorite thing about him, there's too much to adore. this isn't a small detail, but a detail about him I love is how well he understands me, and how much effort he has put into understanding me. I can't describe in words how intently I feel for him. he's everything to me, he's my other half <3
love letters₊˚⊹ 💌 - what made you realise you were an irl yandere? was it something you always knew, or was it something you realised after you developed your obsession? - I think it's something I kind of always knew, and as I grew up I realized that it wasn't how the majority of people felt love. I would cling to my childhood friends, and I have distinct memories of collecting little trinkets from them and getting upset when their attention strayed from me. before I hit double digits, I always had the desire to watch my friends, or anyone I wanted to be friends with. as I got older though, through various medias and seeing how the people around me acted, I realized that my version of love was different. I've never really minded that though
decay ˚⊹𐂯 - do you see a future with your darling? if so, how would you want your life to look like with them? would you travel with them, if so, where? - I definitely see a future with him!! I genuinely see our realtionship lasting, I truly intend to marry my darling. I don't care if it's eloping or a full wedding, I only need him. I don't mind much where we end up, but a lot of our desires align, so I can see me and my darling living somewhere remote/away from others. and I would definitely travel with him, I don't care where. I'd go anywhere he wanted
razorblades ´ཀ` - how much does having a darling impact
your everyday life? and if it affects you a lot, how do you try to cope when your darling isn't around? - it impacts me a lot, my darling is always on my mind. sometimes I genuinely can't think of anything else other than him. when he's offline, I tend to scroll his blog, reread text messages or look at his photos, and just fantasize about having him with me
bloodstains 🩸⊹ ݁˖ - what's your favourite gift you've given / you'd give a darling, and if applicable what's your favourite thing they've given you? - handwritten letters ^^ I've written one for my darling and he's written some for me, I adore them
bittersweet ᥫ᭡.ִֶָ𓂃 - what's your ideal date with your darling? - preferably something just us, like staying in for a movie/anime marathon, or going stargazing. I would like to take him to the aquarium though
carnage𓄧꒷꒦ - are you controlling or more lenient? if your darling acted in a way you didn't like, would you let them because you just want them to be happy and/or view them as perfect, or would you attempt to control or change them to your liking? - I'm not very controlling, I know my darling has his own life, and I see him as an equal, if not superior to me. however, if he did something I truly didn't like or that hurt me, I would simply talk to him. we may codependent but we respect each other and I trust him
chainsaw ˚.🦴 ᵎᵎ - what would be a dealbreaker that makes you lose an obsession with someone? - cheating, I can excuse almost anything, but cheating will make me lose an obsession with someone almost immediately. it's an awful feeling to be cheated on, I wouldn't wish it on anyone
chokehold(っ҂ཀ•)っ - how do you ensure you keep your darling? do you use manipulation, threats, begging etc. - I don't really try to keep my darling, at least not this way. I don't manipulate him or threaten him, although I wouldn't be above begging him to stay if he tried to leave me
blood (＾་།＾)- what's a fantasy you have about your darling that would be unethical or even impossible to actually execute? - I have quite a few, but the most intense one that I have fantasized about is essentially just being kidnapped by my darling, I wouldn't want to leave or have to interact with anyone else. I think this wouldn't really be possible to execute, unfortunately. and for unethical, I admit that I do fantasize about hurting people who consistently interact with him. I don't think I would ever truly act on this, though, unless they were trying to hurt him
guts ୧ ‧₊˚🥩 - how do you express your love? are you upfront, subtle, intense or secretive? do you hide/suppress your yandere traits around your darling to appear more normal, or are you more open about it? - I think I'm pretty upfront with my kind of love, I don't really feel the need to hide my yandere traits. I don't particularly like being subtle with it, either. I want my darling to know how much I love him, no matter how intense it can be
angel cake ꒰ა ♱ ໒꒱ - if you were to make a shrine for your darling, how would you do it? ie scrapbooking, wall shrines, digital shrine etc - I typically make digital shrines, with screenshot of posts, photos, info I have, etc. If I can though I make back-closet shrines, and I do intend to make something like this for my darling when we're irl
scalpel₊˚⊹ᰔ - how do you mark your darling as yours? - unfortunately, me and my darling are long distance, so it's sort of hard to do. I post about him a lot, on all my socials, and I'll always tag him if he has an account as well. in person, with my darlings permission, I'd want matching things like tattoos and scars, or more temporary things like jewelry. I tend to bite people I like a lot, too
switchblade٠🔪ིྀ⭑ -are you more of a dominant or a submissive yan? are you more sadistic or masochistic? - I'm more of a submissive yan, I tend to follow more than I lead, especially with people I have obsessions with. that's not to say I can't be a dominant yan, or that I'll just lay back and take anything, but it's more in my nature to be a submissive one. and I'm definitely a masochistic yan, I like pain. I can be sadistic, but not with my darling
bruised⋆.𐙚 ̊ - how do you react when your darling has hurt you? emotionally and/or physically. do you like hurting them back? - like I said above I'm pretty masochistic, so I'd be fine with my darling hurting me physically. I'd like it, even. emotionally is a little different, I don't particularly like being truly hurt mentally. but I know my darling would never hurt me like that on purpose, so I'd just do my best to communicate that
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
i love when he gets all possessive and jealous, it makes me feel so loved!! yes im all yours!! no i shouldn’t talk to or even look at anyone but you!! not that i’d be interested an anyone else anyway… but i just love when he reminds me that im all his
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
saccharine ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ - gush about your darling !! what are your favourite things about them? what's a small detail about them you like?
love letters₊˚⊹ 💌 - what made you realise you were an irl yandere? was it something you always knew, or was it something you realised after you developed your obsession?
decay ˚⊹𐂯 - do you see a future with your darling? if so, how would you want your life to look like with them? would you travel with them, if so, where?
razorblades ´ཀ` - how much does having a darling impact your everyday life? and if it affects you a lot, how do you try to cope when your darling isn't around?
bloodstains 🩸⊹ ݁˖ - what's your favourite gift you've given / you'd give a darling, and if applicable what's your favourite thing they've given you?
bittersweet ᥫ᭡.ִֶָ𓂃 - what's your ideal date with your darling?
carnage𓄧꒷꒦ - are you controlling or more lenient? if your darling acted in a way you didn't like, would you let them because you just want them to be happy and/or view them as perfect, or would you attempt to control or change them to your liking?
chainsaw ˚.🦴 ᵎᵎ - what would be a dealbreaker that makes you lose an obsession with someone?
chokehold(っ҂ཀ•)っ - how do you ensure you keep your darling? do you use manipulation, threats, begging etc
blood (＾་།＾)- what's a fantasy you have about your darling that would be unethical or even impossible to actually execute?
guts ୧ ‧₊˚🥩 - how do you express your love? are you upfront, subtle, intense or secretive? do you hide/suppress your yandere traits around your darling to appear more normal, or are you more open about it?
angel cake ꒰ა ♱ ໒꒱ - if you were to make a shrine for your darling, how would you do it? ie scrapbooking, wall shrines, digital shrine etc
scalpel₊˚⊹ᰔ - how do you mark your darling as yours?
switchblade٠🔪ིྀ⭑ -are you more of a dominant or a submissive yan? are you more sadistic or masochistic?
bruised⋆.𐙚 ̊ - how do you react when your darling has hurt you? emotionally and/or physically. do you like hurting them back?
